Verboticism: Jackask

'Hey, do you work here?'

DEFINITION: v. To ask someone who is clearly in a store uniform, perhaps on a ladder creating a display or running a cash register "Do you work here?" n. A person who doesn't know how to ask for assistance in a retail store without asking a stupid question.

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Klutztomer

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: kluhtz tom errrrrr

Sentence: If another klutztomer asked him if he was the manager despite his large laminated photo I.D, has $500 dollar suit, his genuine crocodile shoes and his hide briefcase, he would cut out their liver and bring it home to mother for dinner.

Etymology: customer, klutz

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COMMENTS:

LOL Mine is a MORON and yours is a KLUTZ! Everybody is being hilarious on this word :) - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 05:17:00

muchly enjoyed the humor in your sentence and your word - funtastic! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:35:00

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Klutztomer

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: klutz tum err

Sentence: The klutztomer is always riot

Etymology: customer klutz

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Retaildundunce

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: re tayl dun duns

Sentence: Chad was what we call a retaildundunce. He'd come into the store, approach a clerk who was obviously wearing a uniform, complete with name tag and ask them if they worked here? He did this in every department he went into and yet he never bought anything or asked about our merchandise. It turned out that Chad was a "Mystery Shopper" who was hired by an agency to check on our customer service levels. How did we find out what he did? When our security department apprehended him, under his jacket he wore a uniform complete with name tag that said, "Chad, Mystery Shopper!" DUH!

Etymology: Retail (the selling of goods to consumers; usually in small quantities and not for resale) & Redundant (repetition of same sense in different words; use of more words than required to express an idea) & Dunce (these words are used to express a low opinion of someone's intelligence)

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Staffinvection

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: staff in vek shun

Sentence: When George the patient asked the man in the hospital with the white scrubs; the stethoscope, mask and chart whether he worked there as he took George's vitals, he got himself a case of staffinvection.

Etymology: Staff (employee) & Invection (. An expression which inveighs or rails against a person) & Wordplay on Staph Infection (A spherical gram-positive parasitic bacterium of the genus Staphylococcus, usually occurring in grapelike clusters and causing boils, septicemia, and other infections).

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Cusdumber

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kus dum mer

Sentence: If you have ever worked in retail or other service jobs, you know who they are. Sure, not the nice 95% of Customers who actually pay your wage, happily, but the 5% who are the Cusdumber...the ones that usually don't end up spending, just making your life harder. They cannot read signs (like "Final Sale, No refunds"; "One per Customer" or "Do not Open Packages"). They ask foolish questions, "This is the only one in my size, will it still be here next week?" or "Do these emeralds come in any other colour but green?" or "It's 9:00 pm, does that bell ringing mean you are closing? But I just got here!" Sometimes they are rude and say hurtful things like,"Don't you know how to operate a till?" or "When I ask for a sparkly rainbow thingy with bright lights on it, you should know what I mean...did you flunk your training class?" After one of these frustrating encounters, I console myself with the fact that I am not that person and try to not be a cusdumber myself when it is my turn to be a consumer!

Etymology: Customer (someone who pays for goods or services)& Cuss (swear at)& Dumber (slow to learn or understand; lacking intellectual acuity)

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COMMENTS:

Awesome job! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-27: 04:16:00

"Do these emeralds come in any other colour but green?" LOL!!!! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 05:19:00

great word!! - mweinmann, 2009-03-27: 14:45:00

Did she wish the cusdumber went right on buyher? Super marketing word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:07:00

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Moronicretailist

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: more-ron-ik-re-tail-ist

Sentence: Teddy was in the video store perusing through the latest video games when he saw a lady in a red and white uniform with a name tag of Pamela. Teddy asks,"hey do you work here Pamela?" Pamela stared hard at the man and under her breath she called him a "moronicretailist" and points to her Action Video name tag and says,"Well let me see...I'm in Action Video in this ridiculous red and white uniform talking to cutomers and you see my name tag clearly showing I work here and you called me Pamela! "So sir, what can I help you with? "Teddy asks Pamela,"are these the latest video game releases?" Pamela just points to the big red sign right in front of the kiosk where Teddy was already looking...that clearly spells out "latest video games." She shakes her head and walks off mumbling..."that "moronicretailist" must never get out of the house!"

Etymology: Moron;disused term for a person with a mental age between 8 and 12, slang for a stupid person. Retail; Retail comes from the French word retaillier which refers to "cutting off, clip and divide" in terms of tailoring (1365). It first was recorded as a noun with the meaning of a "sale in small quantities" in 1433 (French). Its literal meaning for retail was to "cut off, shred, paring".[2] Like the French, the word retail in both Dutch and German (detailhandel and Einzelhandel respectively) also refer to sale of small quantities of items. Ist; added to retail to show one who buys retail merchandise.

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COMMENTS:

good one - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-27: 12:23:00

Thank you very much Jabberwocky :) - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 22:43:00

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Cusdumber

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kuhs-duh-mer

Sentence: If there is anything that a store clerk hates, it has to be the cusdumber who can't seem to do anything without asking a stupid question or making an ignorant statement. "Do you work here?" "This item is scratched (they just scratched it). Can I get a discount?" The only hope is if they get just a little dumber, they might forget to breath or how to get to to the store.

Etymology: customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another) + dumb (lacking intelligence or good judgment; stupid; dull-witted)

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Duhblivious

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: duh-BLIV-yuss

Sentence: Vernon was so bad about overlooking the obvious and asking lame questions his friends had labeled his lame practice as duhblivious and even that was something that got by him.

Etymology: Blend of 'duh' (used to express annoyance at banality, obviousness, or stupidity) and 'oblivious' (unmindful; unconscious; unaware)

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Querylyevident

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: kweer/lee/ev/i/dent

Sentence: Even though Sam stood at the crosswalk in his bright orange vest with the yellow reflective stripe which said Crossing Guard, holding a giant stop sign, pedestrians would still pose the querlyevident question "Are you the Crossing Guard"? Sometimes it made him feel like running amok in traffic.

Etymology: query + evident + 'clearly evident'

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COMMENTS:

LOL! made him feel like running amok in traffic. GOOD ONE! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 22:49:00

Funny! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-28: 00:00:00

play on the oft said 'fairly evident', too. Excellent word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:00:00

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Duhblivious

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: duh-BLIV-yuss

Sentence: Germaine was so bad about overlooking the obvious and asking lame questions his friends had labeled his lame practice as duhblivious and even that was something that got by him.

Etymology: Blend of 'duh' (used to express annoyance at banality, obviousness, or stupidity) and 'oblivious' (unmindful; unconscious; unaware)

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COMMENTS:

Duhlicious word, Mustang! - Nosila, 2009-03-27: 13:12:00

perfect! - mweinmann, 2009-03-27: 14:46:00

Good one! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-27: 23:59:00

Awared winning word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:11:00

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