Verboticism: Stupormarketing

'Hey, do you work here?'

DEFINITION: v. To ask someone who is clearly in a store uniform, perhaps on a ladder creating a display or running a cash register "Do you work here?" n. A person who doesn't know how to ask for assistance in a retail store without asking a stupid question.

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Assking

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: ass king

Sentence: On his shoulder, the huge brassy button said in big letters: assistant manager. Therefore, everyone was asstounded and asstonished to hear Stu Pid, assking, "Do you work here?"

Etymology: ASS, KING, ASKING. Asking redumbdant (redundant) questions makes one an assking. ASS - offensive term that deliberately insults somebody's intelligence. KING - the greatest and most powerful leader of a people who are united by a common tie, in this case, by their level of intelligence. ASKING - to question.

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COMMENTS:

Very funny! And very good! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-27: 04:18:00

Well there's an Ass----,Klutz---- and a Moron---- for today...we're all in the same mood :) Good one there! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 05:36:00

terrific - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-27: 12:24:00

I know Stu....worked with him....tried to avoid him...couldnt. - Mustang, 2009-03-28: 03:32:00

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Excusemebutt

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: ex-kuse-mee-but

Sentence: Karla was still stinging about losing her job at the securities firm when she started her shift at the discount store. Not only did she have to give up her salary and benefits, but instead of having a latte with the girls in mailing she was stuck with spending her days trying to communicate with the idiot teenagers who worked there. On top of everything else she was ready to take a swing at the next excusemebutt that came up to her to see if she was an employee when she was obviously wearing a disgusting brown shirt with a moronic pink and orange logo on it. They would look directly at her name tag and say, "Excuse me, but, do you work here?" She wanted to scream,"Do you really think someone would intentionally go out of the house in this shirt?"

Etymology: Excuse: pardon, forgive; Butt: (slang) buttocks

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COMMENTS:

Very funny! - splendiction, 2009-03-28: 11:12:00

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Cusdumber

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kus dum mer

Sentence: If you have ever worked in retail or other service jobs, you know who they are. Sure, not the nice 95% of Customers who actually pay your wage, happily, but the 5% who are the Cusdumber...the ones that usually don't end up spending, just making your life harder. They cannot read signs (like "Final Sale, No refunds"; "One per Customer" or "Do not Open Packages"). They ask foolish questions, "This is the only one in my size, will it still be here next week?" or "Do these emeralds come in any other colour but green?" or "It's 9:00 pm, does that bell ringing mean you are closing? But I just got here!" Sometimes they are rude and say hurtful things like,"Don't you know how to operate a till?" or "When I ask for a sparkly rainbow thingy with bright lights on it, you should know what I mean...did you flunk your training class?" After one of these frustrating encounters, I console myself with the fact that I am not that person and try to not be a cusdumber myself when it is my turn to be a consumer!

Etymology: Customer (someone who pays for goods or services)& Cuss (swear at)& Dumber (slow to learn or understand; lacking intellectual acuity)

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COMMENTS:

Awesome job! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-27: 04:16:00

"Do these emeralds come in any other colour but green?" LOL!!!! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 05:19:00

great word!! - mweinmann, 2009-03-27: 14:45:00

Did she wish the cusdumber went right on buyher? Super marketing word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:07:00

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Interrograte

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: in TER ro GRATE

Sentence: As Emma would pose her redundant and asinine questions to wait-staff, store-clerks, and other service industry employees, it became clear she was posing in more ways than one. She would interrograte these poor unsuspecting workers with her snobvious questions to show her tiny bit of power over them. Then she would quickly send them off to answer to her whims. One day we sat at a restaurant table where there was a buzzer to bring the waiters. She had them come about ten times. “Is this water in this jug? Are these organic lemons? Is the coffee fresh? Freshly ground? What is that song playing on the radio right now? Does your boss also own the franchise across town?” She just wouldn’t stop.

Etymology: INTERROGATE: GRATE: to get on someones nerve; irritate

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COMMENTS:

like it kate - galwaywegian, 2009-03-27: 10:45:00

It's a grate word! - Nosila, 2009-03-27: 13:10:00

Great blending! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:30:00

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Jackask

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: jack-ass-k

Sentence: Jill wandered around K-mart looking for help with door hinges. Eventually she went to the service desk to ask a question. The assistant called over the speaker system "Hardware to the service desk, Hardware to the service desk". When the hardware expert appeared at the service desk, Jill made a total jackask of herself saying "do you work here?"

Etymology: jackass (fool) + ask + K (as in kmart)

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COMMENTS:

mrskellyscl laughing out loud...great word - mrskellyscl, 2009-03-27: 08:58:00

super word - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-27: 12:24:00

Hilarious! THanks for such great word! - splendiction, 2009-03-28: 11:14:00

Easy to remember, meaning apparent, great blending, clever pun, ... Superb Won! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:32:00

petaj thanks all - petaj, 2009-03-30: 06:40:00

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Staffinvection

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: staff in vek shun

Sentence: When George the patient asked the man in the hospital with the white scrubs; the stethoscope, mask and chart whether he worked there as he took George's vitals, he got himself a case of staffinvection.

Etymology: Staff (employee) & Invection (. An expression which inveighs or rails against a person) & Wordplay on Staph Infection (A spherical gram-positive parasitic bacterium of the genus Staphylococcus, usually occurring in grapelike clusters and causing boils, septicemia, and other infections).

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Moronicretailist

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: more-ron-ik-re-tail-ist

Sentence: Teddy was in the video store perusing through the latest video games when he saw a lady in a red and white uniform with a name tag of Pamela. Teddy asks,"hey do you work here Pamela?" Pamela stared hard at the man and under her breath she called him a "moronicretailist" and points to her Action Video name tag and says,"Well let me see...I'm in Action Video in this ridiculous red and white uniform talking to cutomers and you see my name tag clearly showing I work here and you called me Pamela! "So sir, what can I help you with? "Teddy asks Pamela,"are these the latest video game releases?" Pamela just points to the big red sign right in front of the kiosk where Teddy was already looking...that clearly spells out "latest video games." She shakes her head and walks off mumbling..."that "moronicretailist" must never get out of the house!"

Etymology: Moron;disused term for a person with a mental age between 8 and 12, slang for a stupid person. Retail; Retail comes from the French word retaillier which refers to "cutting off, clip and divide" in terms of tailoring (1365). It first was recorded as a noun with the meaning of a "sale in small quantities" in 1433 (French). Its literal meaning for retail was to "cut off, shred, paring".[2] Like the French, the word retail in both Dutch and German (detailhandel and Einzelhandel respectively) also refer to sale of small quantities of items. Ist; added to retail to show one who buys retail merchandise.

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COMMENTS:

good one - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-27: 12:23:00

Thank you very much Jabberwocky :) - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 22:43:00

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Inquisidolt

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: in-QUIS-i-dolt

Sentence: Just got this one in "under the wire"...(electrified cattle fence)...I don't really know if this is "appropriate", but i TRUST all you crazy Verbotomists not to judge me too harshly... PAMBO wore his best "hoodie" while out shopping, and when he spotted the slinky young lady sporting a semi-commercial looking outer garb reminiscent of his favorite Progressive Insurance Representative (Stephanie Courtney), PAMBO cast all caution to the wind and asked her if she could get him a discount. PAMBO was rejected like a transplanted baboon heart, but it didn't cramp his style, because he was a dyed-in-the-wool INQUISIDOLT!

Etymology: One who makes obviously redundant inquiries....INQUISITION: a severe questioning;Middle English inquisicioun, from Anglo-French inquisition, from Latin inquisition-, inquisitio, from inquirere .....DOLT: a stupid person; probably akin to Old English dol foolish 1553....

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Where can i get a fish license? - metrohumanx, 2009-03-28: 00:19:00

Excellent....Pambo was master of the duhblivious... - Mustang, 2009-03-28: 03:29:00

Maybe you can get a fish license at the office of the justice of the deeps. - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:17:00

Great job of using James' cartoon for the basis for your sentence. Pambo is lucky he's not facing a sentence for his inquisidolt! You put a fresh spin on an old thing and got a big grin! As the old man in the old tv show Laugh In used to say "very interrrresting!" - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:29:00

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Parleyfool

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: parh-lee-foolh

Sentence: This is a true story. It must be documented! During the 70s, while a hippie, wandering around Quebec, nervous about having to speak what little French I had absorbed in high school, I stuck my head into the door of a pub somewhere near Sherbrooke and spoke to a row of men sitting in semi-darkness at the bar, "Parlez-vous Francais?" They turned in unison, like a row of cows, and mooed, "Ooouui." Needless to say, I let the door slam shut and was too mortified to correct myself. What a parleyfool I was...

Etymology: Combining PARLEY, a discussion (from Fr. parler, to speak) + FOOL. Could be spelled ParlerFou!

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COMMENTS:

Cute story. :) - kateinkorea, 2009-03-27: 23:55:00

Enjoyed your sentence. Your create is a great blending plus a great fun pun on parle vous, too! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:41:00

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Cusdumber

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kuhs-duh-mer

Sentence: If there is anything that a store clerk hates, it has to be the cusdumber who can't seem to do anything without asking a stupid question or making an ignorant statement. "Do you work here?" "This item is scratched (they just scratched it). Can I get a discount?" The only hope is if they get just a little dumber, they might forget to breath or how to get to to the store.

Etymology: customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another) + dumb (lacking intelligence or good judgment; stupid; dull-witted)

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