Verboticism: Computard

'Honey? Honey! Can you hear me?'

DEFINITION: n., A slow computer with insufficient memory; also, a slow-thinking husband. v., To take an extraordinarily long time to respond to a relatively simple request.

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Nimpcompute

Created by: jrogan

Pronunciation: nim-com-PUTE

Sentence: He was such a nimpcompute that would not respond to non-electronic communications

Etymology: nincompoop + compute

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Cronstipated

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: kron-sti-pay-tid

Sentence: I guess I added too many bells and whistles to my computer, as it became quite cronstipated upon booting up.

Etymology: cron - A Unix command for scheduling jobs to be executed sometime in the future; constipated

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COMMENTS:

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-01-07: 12:07:00

great sentence! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-07: 18:13:00

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Calcuwait

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: cal-cyou-wait

Sentence: My computer, my husband, my boss, and my kids, drive me crazy with their calcuwaiting.

Etymology: A play on calculate,you and wait ... calcuwait ... a verb to describe any thing or anyone who is slow to respond!

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Amigamigo

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: am eee gam eee go

Sentence: she was unhappy with her amigamigos memory, anniversaries, birthdays always crashed. Also, there was the issue of his floppy thing.

Etymology: amiga amigo

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Datasaurus

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /dah-tuh-SAWR-uhs/

Sentence: Sarah complained to Jerry, again, that their computer was such a datasaurus, she could take a shower, do her hair and make-up, prepare breakfast, eat, and do the dishes, all before the 'darn thing' was finished booting up. Apparently, he was still plodcessing over that information, after several months of her complaints.

Etymology: data - information (Latin, plural of 'datum') + -saurus - suffix used in the names of extinct reptiles; e.g. brontosaurus (Greek, saûros "lizard")

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Compudurrh

CrayonWarrior

Created by: CrayonWarrior

Pronunciation: Kom-pyu-derrh

Sentence: oh no. Lisa's compudurrh had crashed AGAIN. it would break at random times, and it drove her MAD.

Etymology: Computer. Durrh - sound made when mocking a stupid person

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Obslowlete

Created by: gemmgemms

Pronunciation: ah-b-sloh-leet

Sentence: My brother is such an obslowlete. He is one of the older makes.

Etymology: obsolete:meaning unusable+slow

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COMMENTS:

It's not easy to embed one word in another! Kudos for this creation! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-11: 14:16:00

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Pokeyman

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: po kee man

Sentence: When Polly could no longer wait for her slow computer, she complained to her husband, Paul. He took forever to process her request and so she decided she could not rely on her pokeyman to help her play her Pokémon anytime soon. Polly has now upgraded her computer and her husband.

Etymology: Pokey (slow) & Man (male spose) & Wordplay on Pokémon (Video games series)

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Eonator

Created by: HollisWoods

Pronunciation: ee-uhn, ee-on eyt or

Sentence: Francesca is a researcher for various clients in Wash, D.C. Most of the research required needs to be done online and is usually accompanied by,"I need this yesterday!" There is a power failure in her office, so she is going to have to work from home. Now she is in a near panic because her home office doesn't have the sophisticated equipment she has at the downtown office. Francesca's hubby promised he would either upgrade or replace most of her equipment as a gift to her. This is a promise and process long overdue. Now she is in a bind and is concerned she won't meet her clients' deadlines. She is tired and frustrated by her eonator of a husband and her eonator of a computer. She will have to rely on her collegue, Susan, to help her. At least she finds some relief in the knowledge that she will have Susan's assistance and access to state-of-the-art equipment to meet the deadlines due. While traveling to Susan's office, Francesca couldn't help but wonder if her husband was home eonating on how and when to start her office upgrade.

Etymology: eon: an indefinitely long period of time ate: cause or make

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Decelermate

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: de sel er mayt

Sentence: Allegra had never quite gotten used to the fact that her hubby, Dell, could decelermate any discussion or activity. He appeared to act and think and speak in slow motion and with age, this lethargy became more noticeable. When she asked him about replacing her very slow old computer, he was actually slower than the computer in responding. It is little wonder why he was dropped off at the recycling centre with all the other useless equipment.

Etymology: Decelerate (lose velocity; move more slowly) & Mate (spouse, partner in marriage/relationship)

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