Verboticism: Laintracks

'Why do you iron our sheets every night?'

DEFINITION: n., The deep red lines and/or furrows, which appear on a person's face after they have slept on wrinkled or creased bed sheets. v., To wake up and discover that your face matches your wrinkled bed sheets.

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Visaginen

Created by: LotusB

Pronunciation: Vis-AHGE-in-en

Sentence: When he awakened, Carl noticed his face and neck were hurting. Thinking he had been bitten by a bug, he ran to the bathroom mirror only to find he wasn't attacked by bed bugs, but rather visaginen! His sheets attacked him in the night!

Etymology: Visage (Face) + Linen (Sheets, Linens, etc) = Visaginen

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Sheetfaced

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: shētfāst

Sentence: After a late night of partying and a very short stint face down on the bed Lillie found that she was again sheetfaced.

Etymology: sheet (a large rectangular piece of cotton or other fabric, used on a bed) + face (the front part of a person*s head from the forehead to the chin) a play off sh*tfaced

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COMMENTS:

aha - Nosila, 2010-03-20: 00:06:00

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Cheekprints

contiki

Created by: contiki

Pronunciation: cheek prints

Sentence: I woke up with some crazy cheekprints this morning. Looked like a treasure map on my face.

Etymology:

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Discomforter

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dis kom for ter

Sentence: Each morning since she turned 40, Mary had woken up with a discomforter, not a comforter, with her in bed. The pain was caused by the wrinkle tracts left on her face from her bedding. It took her face an hour to pop out these furrows and Mary was very worried that one day soon, they would stay permanently.

Etymology: Discomfort (an uncomfortable feeling in some part of the body) & Comforter (bedding made of two layers of cloth filled with stuffing and stitched together;quilt;duvet)

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Linedament

thegoatisbad

Created by: thegoatisbad

Pronunciation: lin-ed-e-ment

Sentence: Ever since daylight savings time had destroyed her life, Kimberly napped during her lunch break. She was not a peaceful sleeper. Often, Kimberly woke up with a start and once woke up to realize that the weekly office meeting was starting; she rushed to the conference room unaware of the drool on her blouse and the paperclip embedded in her face. She burst in asking "what'd I miss?!" frantic and breathing heavily. Zinnia calmly leaned toward Jared and whispered "I think she missed her linedament."

Etymology: lined (marked or covered with lines) + lineament (features and contours of a face)

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COMMENTS:

good one - Nosila, 2010-03-20: 00:06:00

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Naplication

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: nap-li-ca-shen

Sentence: Naplication is a perfect excuse for my wrinkles. At this age, it's hard to tell if the wrinkles are from the pillow or if I really look like that.

Etymology: nap: + plication: the act or process of folding

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Creasipitation

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kree-sip-i-tey-shuh n

Sentence: Tonight's forecast; dark with an 80% chance of creasipitation. That's right, those wrinkles are just gonna rain down on your face.

Etymology: crease (a wrinkle, especially one on the face) + precipitation ( rain, snow, sleet, dew, etc, formed by condensation of water vapour in the atmosphere)

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Dermalinenitis

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Der ma lin en eye tis

Sentence: Lyle was groggy when he looked in the mirror but he had such a major case of dermalinenitis he couldnt help but see it even in his stupor.

Etymology: Linen and dermatitis

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Slumberumples

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: slum ber rum pulls

Sentence: On the morning after their honeymoon started, Wilma awoke with a bad case of the slumberumples...big red lines all over her face. Her groom, Will, thought it cute and endearing. Wilma ran to the bathroom and spent over an hour doing her ablutions. When she emerged, her smooth, creamy complexion had returned. She turned off the lights before she joined him in bed each evening. It took Will many years to realize that Wilma's skin had slumberumples 24/7 and during her morning routine, she was actually applying enough war paint and concealer to hide the awful truth. Yes, she had been born with what looked like a road map imbedded on the largest organ in her body...

Etymology: Slumber (be asleep)& Rumples (become wrinkled or crumpled or creased;to gather something into small wrinkles or folds)

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Sheetpleated

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: shētplētd

Sentence: Joan had a very difficult time applying makeup to her sheetpleated face this morning. After her skin relaxed, she had more streaks than a ten-year-old windshield wiper.

Etymology: sheet (a large rectangular piece of cotton or other fabric, used on a bed to cover the mattress) + pleated (a double or multiple fold in a garment or other item made of cloth)

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