Verboticism: Mistech

'Computer programmers do not make mistakes.'

DEFINITION: n. A computer programmer who corrects software problems by bugging the users, rather than debugging the software. v. To pinpoint the blame for any defects in a product, especially a software product which you have created, on "illogical" end-users.

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Nincomputable

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: nin/com/pute/abul

Sentence: Our IT department always makes me feel like a nincomputable.

Etymology: nincompoop + computable

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Techsuppose

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: tek-sup-pose

Sentence: Jean hated to call Techsuppose. Not only would it take half the day to reach someone, but the smarmy voice on the other end of the phone assumed that she was an imbecile and asked the same stupid questions, "Is it plugged in?" "Did you restart it?" Eventually, she discovered that someone neglected to use the "Mother-May-I" command during set-up and now she'd have to spend the rest of the afternoon downloading various patches, drivers, upgrades and fixes. Another day sacrificed to the tyrannical techgods.

Etymology: (play on techsupport) Suppose: to believe, especially on uncertain or tentative grounds; to consider as probable or likely

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COMMENTS:

So true! - splendiction, 2009-06-26: 22:53:00

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Buggle

Created by: jrogan

Pronunciation: bug-gull

Sentence: Jonathan was a real buggle and depended on user feedback to make sure all his software worked as expected... Whatever they said he'd feed it back to them as user errors.

Etymology: bug + gle

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Dissinformation

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: disinfərmāshən

Sentence: Lawrence is quite sure of his programming skills. When something doesn’t work the way he expects, he is preemptively sure that it is caused by user error. He has been known to spread dissinformation, belittling anyone who would dare question his skills.

Etymology: diss (act or speak in a disrespectful way toward)+ misinformation (false or inaccurate information, esp. that which is deliberately intended to deceive)

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Technillogicrat

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: tech - neh - LODJ - uh - crat

Sentence: Having an overblown ego and chutzpah to match, Cranston was a technillogicrat in the extreme who would never admit ignorance but would always blame everyone and everything else for things he could not remedy.

Etymology: Blend of 'technical' and 'illogical' with suffix '-crat'...member of a dominant class

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Macintoldyouso

youmustvotenato

Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: mack-in-told-you-so

Sentence: "The debug error of your .doc file has corrupted .dll operating systembytes," said Herbert, the IT guy. "Sooooorry Mr. Macintoldyouso," I muttered under my breath.

Etymology: Macintosh+Told you so

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Developastard

Created by: scissorlips

Pronunciation: duh-vel-op-AHS-turd

Sentence: "It's crashing when I hit the spacebar!", screamed Ms. Yewser. "That's probably because you've damaged my software by mashing the return button one too many times!" was Arman Gheddon's reply. Being a developastard of considerably little patience, Arman then simply left her office.

Etymology: developer: as in, software developer + bastard: insulting term of address for people who are stupid or irritating or ridiculous.

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Computerpogrommer

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: com pew ter po grom mer

Sentence: Java a minute to hear about the Computerpogrommer in our office? His name is Seymour Fawltz and his Modem Operandii is to belittle you in front of your peers and Excel at making you feel like an idiot about your inferior computer skills. It was by sheer chance that someone found out he had entered the local Click&Drag Queen Contest, under the name Ana Log Macintosh, a Domainatrix. Now he knows we know his secret, so his bark is not worse than his byte. We found his Encryptionite!

Etymology: Computer Progammer & Pogrom (organized persecution of an ethnic group (in this case, non-Geeks)

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COMMENTS:

LOL! A great creation. - splendiction, 2009-06-26: 22:52:00

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Custoculpate

Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: CUSTOmer+CULPable+ATE

Sentence: His first reaction to any reported application problem is to custoculpate, not wanting to think the code could be incorrect, even when that has proven to be the case over and over.

Etymology: CUSTOmer+CULPable+ATE

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Criticompados

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Krit-ee-komp-a-doss

Sentence: The criticompados was insistent that the blame lay with me, but I was sure I was not in the wrong, and he knew it!! He tried the same trick on my colleague only last week.

Etymology: Criti(Critisize,blame) comp(computer) dos(Disk operating system)

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