Verboticism: Chronologre

'Don't tell me your trying to sneak out early?'

DEFINITION: n. A type of frustration created by a manager who never notices when you work late, but always nags you for leaving early whenever you leave on time. v. To carefully monitor your subordinates to ensure that they never leave work a minute early.

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Whorology

Created by: Jamagra

Pronunciation: whore/ol'/uh/gee

Sentence: Daphne felt that Phillip, the new manager in the Department of Silly Clocks (afternoon watch), was a bit... alarming. She frequently heard him tocking to himself outside her office door. His imprecise movements infuriated her: only yesterday he had slopped quartz and quartz of water all over her timesheet and she'd had to redo it! Lately he'd taken to fobbing his unfinished work off on her just when things should have been winding down for the day. Quite often she had to wrist-le with the urge to clock Phillip upside the head. So far she'd proven resistant, but who knew how long that would last. Sometimes she fantasized about setting her hands around his windpipe... The man never seemed to notice all the nights she stayed back, but if she left work before 6pm, he would spring forward and reprimand her. She simply had to face facts: time had changed him from a horologist to a whorologist.

Etymology: whore + horology (the art or science of making timepieces or of measuring time)

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COMMENTS:

Face it, it's crystal clear that's my kind of story...Philip obviously has not had a good movement for some time, which is bound to wind him up and make him cuckoo! You'd be ticked, too. Oh well, even a broken clock is right twice a day...Cheers - Nosila, 2008-04-23: 01:28:00

dialightful! - galwaywegian, 2008-04-23: 06:10:00

Can the hands of a clock ever clap? great sentence - ticked all the boxes - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-23: 09:01:00

Don't forget the "Ho" in horology! Luv the sentence - OZZIEBOB, 2008-04-23: 17:54:00

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Tocktickrelationship

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: tok tik ree lay shun ship

Sentence: The interaction, which had always borne the hallmarks of a tocktickrelationship ended badly. The subsequent surgical attempts to reverse the offense which led to its demise proved unsuccessful, leading to extreme embarassment every time her now ex-boss had to travel abroad. He would regularly be stopped and stripsearched at airports and advised by security staff that it was the first time they had found somebody trying to smuggle a twenty dollar watch out of the country using that particular technique.

Etymology: tock tick, toxic relationship

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COMMENTS:

reminds me of the crocodile in Peter Pan but then that would be a croctocktickrelationship - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-23: 08:59:00

But this is just pretend so it is a mocktocktickrelationship, but if it was in the clinic, it would be a doctocktickrelationship or in a gym, a jocktocktickrelationship or in a hosiery store, a socktocktickrelationship...it's endless possibilities! - Nosila, 2008-04-23: 20:34:00

...or between sports acne physicians, a pockmarkjockdoctocktickrelationship - stache, 2008-04-23: 21:57:00

What have I begun? - galwaywegian, 2008-04-24: 04:40:00

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Hourgrass

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: our/grass

Sentence: Stan was the company hourgrass and would tattle on anyone who took a minute longer for coffee breaks or lunch. He had a special alarm that would sound if the door was opened before 5:00 p.m.

Etymology: hour glass + grass (as in tattle)

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COMMENTS:

Stan sounds like a grasshole! - Nosila, 2009-06-16: 10:48:00

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Clockants

Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: klok-ants

Sentence: Angie had been working late for the past few weeks without any complaint or second thought. That is, until she had to leave on time to get home to fix dinner for her fiance's parents. She was clockant as she tip-toed past her boss's office. Breathing a sigh of relief when she cleared the doorway, she looked up and he was right in front of her. "Leaving, are you?" he said in a snooty voice. She pretended not to hear him and slipped out the door.

Etymology: clock, a device for noting the time + ant

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Metermaidservant

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Rita is a lovely metermaidservant who worships the clock.

Etymology: meter maid + maid servant

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Timestapo

youmustvotenato

Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: time-stop-po

Sentence: Michael, the manager, immediately asked why I was walking out the door at 4:58. Of course, the TIMESTAPO don't understand that when your work is complete and your computer is shut down that its pointless to sit around twittling thumbs.

Etymology: time stamp + gestapo

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Bossitch

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: bos-itch

Sentence: Mr. Needler Nosey was such a bositch to his employees and only noticed what he presumed was bad behavior.

Etymology: Boss- A person in charge of the company employees. *itch- Slang for a person who complains about everything.

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Slackervise

Created by: stache

Pronunciation: slak'-ər-vīz'

Sentence: Fred's secretary Ethel had arrived seventy-seven seconds past her forty-minute allotted lunch period, so Fred made sure to slackervise even more diligently than usual to insure she made up the time at actual work before leaving for the evening; at her claimed typing speed of 110 wpm, that should work out to an extra 141.16667 words for the day.

Etymology: 'slacker,' less taut; 'vise,' device for holding objects firmly in place.

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COMMENTS:

Nice word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-04-23: 17:50:00

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Timepeeper

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: time-peep-er

Sentence: Helen suspected that Tom, the manager, was a timpeeper when she saw him standing by the coffee machine watching every move she made and checking his watch to make sure her break wasn't too long. He was always at the door in the morning with a creepy look on his face watching her take off her coat and he was there in the evening when she put her coat back on to go home. He was seen peeping over the top of her cubicle to make sure she wasn't on Ebay instead of working and wasting company time. One day, however, he went too far and followed her to the ladies room to see that she didn't take too long. He was caught on a surveilance video and her attorney had no problem filing a harassment suit.

Etymology: play on timekeeper -- peeper: voyeur (Peeping Tom)

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COMMENTS:

The peep became a purp! Good word. - Nosila, 2009-06-16: 10:45:00

Excellent - Mustang, 2009-06-17: 00:45:00

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Clockjock

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: klok jok

Sentence: Hal was a clockjock. He eyed his staff like a hungry lion at a zebra watering hole. If they tried to sneak away early, he'd confront them to the point, they'd never do it again. One day, young Mindy raced to the door to escape and was caught by Hal. "Where do you think you are going?" he charged. "My water broke and I need to get to hospital." she cried. "Nice try", he countered. "You've been here long enough to know that all deliveries are made at the rear of the building, after 6:00 p.m.".

Etymology: Clock (a timepiece that shows the time of day) & Jock (a person trained to compete)

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COMMENTS:

karenanne "...deliveries are made at the rear of the building, after 6:00 p.m." - HA - priceless - karenanne, 2010-06-29: 19:43:00

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