Verboticism: Duhblivious

'Hey, do you work here?'

DEFINITION: v. To ask someone who is clearly in a store uniform, perhaps on a ladder creating a display or running a cash register "Do you work here?" n. A person who doesn't know how to ask for assistance in a retail store without asking a stupid question.

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Retaildundunce

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: re tayl dun duns

Sentence: Chad was what we call a retaildundunce. He'd come into the store, approach a clerk who was obviously wearing a uniform, complete with name tag and ask them if they worked here? He did this in every department he went into and yet he never bought anything or asked about our merchandise. It turned out that Chad was a "Mystery Shopper" who was hired by an agency to check on our customer service levels. How did we find out what he did? When our security department apprehended him, under his jacket he wore a uniform complete with name tag that said, "Chad, Mystery Shopper!" DUH!

Etymology: Retail (the selling of goods to consumers; usually in small quantities and not for resale) & Redundant (repetition of same sense in different words; use of more words than required to express an idea) & Dunce (these words are used to express a low opinion of someone's intelligence)

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Cusdumber

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kus dum mer

Sentence: If you have ever worked in retail or other service jobs, you know who they are. Sure, not the nice 95% of Customers who actually pay your wage, happily, but the 5% who are the Cusdumber...the ones that usually don't end up spending, just making your life harder. They cannot read signs (like "Final Sale, No refunds"; "One per Customer" or "Do not Open Packages"). They ask foolish questions, "This is the only one in my size, will it still be here next week?" or "Do these emeralds come in any other colour but green?" or "It's 9:00 pm, does that bell ringing mean you are closing? But I just got here!" Sometimes they are rude and say hurtful things like,"Don't you know how to operate a till?" or "When I ask for a sparkly rainbow thingy with bright lights on it, you should know what I mean...did you flunk your training class?" After one of these frustrating encounters, I console myself with the fact that I am not that person and try to not be a cusdumber myself when it is my turn to be a consumer!

Etymology: Customer (someone who pays for goods or services)& Cuss (swear at)& Dumber (slow to learn or understand; lacking intellectual acuity)

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COMMENTS:

Awesome job! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-27: 04:16:00

"Do these emeralds come in any other colour but green?" LOL!!!! - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 05:19:00

great word!! - mweinmann, 2009-03-27: 14:45:00

Did she wish the cusdumber went right on buyher? Super marketing word! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:07:00

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Staffinvection

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: staff in vek shun

Sentence: When George the patient asked the man in the hospital with the white scrubs; the stethoscope, mask and chart whether he worked there as he took George's vitals, he got himself a case of staffinvection.

Etymology: Staff (employee) & Invection (. An expression which inveighs or rails against a person) & Wordplay on Staph Infection (A spherical gram-positive parasitic bacterium of the genus Staphylococcus, usually occurring in grapelike clusters and causing boils, septicemia, and other infections).

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Customyeranidiot

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kəstəmyoŏranidēət

Sentence: Spring has come to the Mall. There is a sense of renewal as the new product lines are displayed. Gone are the Winter doldrums of the Christmas left-over sales and inventory sales. Maybe, just maybe the next customer who comes through the door will be engaging, funny, insightful, interesting... but alas each entrant into the customer-of-the-year competition seems to find a way to transmogrify from patron to customyeranidiot with insipid questions like, "Do you work here?" "Are these (the display with the strobing 50% off sign) the sale items?" or "This item that I just dropped on the floor has a chip. Can I get a mark-down on it?" The clerk soon retreats to thoughts of after-work diversions and mentally seeks a "happy place" instead of the "uzi on the rooftop" place. Retail is swell!

Etymology: customer (a person or organization that buys goods or services from a store or business) + "You're an idiot" (self- explanatory)

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Duhblivious

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: duh-BLIV-yuss

Sentence: Vernon was so bad about overlooking the obvious and asking lame questions his friends had labeled his lame practice as duhblivious and even that was something that got by him.

Etymology: Blend of 'duh' (used to express annoyance at banality, obviousness, or stupidity) and 'oblivious' (unmindful; unconscious; unaware)

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Jackask

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: jack-ass-k

Sentence: Jill wandered around K-mart looking for help with door hinges. Eventually she went to the service desk to ask a question. The assistant called over the speaker system "Hardware to the service desk, Hardware to the service desk". When the hardware expert appeared at the service desk, Jill made a total jackask of herself saying "do you work here?"

Etymology: jackass (fool) + ask + K (as in kmart)

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COMMENTS:

mrskellyscl laughing out loud...great word - mrskellyscl, 2009-03-27: 08:58:00

super word - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-27: 12:24:00

Hilarious! THanks for such great word! - splendiction, 2009-03-28: 11:14:00

Easy to remember, meaning apparent, great blending, clever pun, ... Superb Won! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:32:00

petaj thanks all - petaj, 2009-03-30: 06:40:00

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Moronicretailist

Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: more-ron-ik-re-tail-ist

Sentence: Teddy was in the video store perusing through the latest video games when he saw a lady in a red and white uniform with a name tag of Pamela. Teddy asks,"hey do you work here Pamela?" Pamela stared hard at the man and under her breath she called him a "moronicretailist" and points to her Action Video name tag and says,"Well let me see...I'm in Action Video in this ridiculous red and white uniform talking to cutomers and you see my name tag clearly showing I work here and you called me Pamela! "So sir, what can I help you with? "Teddy asks Pamela,"are these the latest video game releases?" Pamela just points to the big red sign right in front of the kiosk where Teddy was already looking...that clearly spells out "latest video games." She shakes her head and walks off mumbling..."that "moronicretailist" must never get out of the house!"

Etymology: Moron;disused term for a person with a mental age between 8 and 12, slang for a stupid person. Retail; Retail comes from the French word retaillier which refers to "cutting off, clip and divide" in terms of tailoring (1365). It first was recorded as a noun with the meaning of a "sale in small quantities" in 1433 (French). Its literal meaning for retail was to "cut off, shred, paring".[2] Like the French, the word retail in both Dutch and German (detailhandel and Einzelhandel respectively) also refer to sale of small quantities of items. Ist; added to retail to show one who buys retail merchandise.

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COMMENTS:

good one - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-27: 12:23:00

Thank you very much Jabberwocky :) - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-27: 22:43:00

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Klutztomer

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: klutz tum err

Sentence: The klutztomer is always riot

Etymology: customer klutz

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Interrograte

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: in TER ro GRATE

Sentence: As Emma would pose her redundant and asinine questions to wait-staff, store-clerks, and other service industry employees, it became clear she was posing in more ways than one. She would interrograte these poor unsuspecting workers with her snobvious questions to show her tiny bit of power over them. Then she would quickly send them off to answer to her whims. One day we sat at a restaurant table where there was a buzzer to bring the waiters. She had them come about ten times. “Is this water in this jug? Are these organic lemons? Is the coffee fresh? Freshly ground? What is that song playing on the radio right now? Does your boss also own the franchise across town?” She just wouldn’t stop.

Etymology: INTERROGATE: GRATE: to get on someones nerve; irritate

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COMMENTS:

like it kate - galwaywegian, 2009-03-27: 10:45:00

It's a grate word! - Nosila, 2009-03-27: 13:10:00

Great blending! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:30:00

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Stupormarketing

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: stoo + por + mark + keting

Sentence: As a retail clerk, Jonah could vouch for all of the stupormarketing that is occurring in his town. It is difficult for him to reign in the sarcasm when asked if he works in the store while he mops up a spill or stocks the shelves from a pile of boxes.

Etymology: Stupor (the lack of critical cognitive function) Supermarket( A large self-service retail market that sells food and household goods) marketing (shopping at a market)

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COMMENTS:

heh - galwaywegian, 2009-03-27: 10:45:00

stupendous! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-28: 15:42:00

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