{"id":1022,"date":"2010-09-08T12:00:04","date_gmt":"2010-09-08T16:00:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/?p=1022"},"modified":"2010-09-08T12:00:04","modified_gmt":"2010-09-08T16:00:04","slug":"desktopdysfunction-i-dont-let-my-laptop-date","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/?p=1022","title":{"rendered":"Desktopdysfunction: I don’t let my laptop date!"},"content":{"rendered":"

DEFINITION:<\/strong> v.<\/em> A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n.<\/em> To stall out a computer by installing a software “upgrade”.<\/p>\n

\"I<\/p>\n

VERBOTICISMS:<\/strong> (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)<\/em><\/p>\n

Desktopdysfunction<\/strong>: \/desk top dis funk shun<\/em>\/ You know the embarrassment, the guilt, the feelings of inadequacy, the viagravvation. Yes, we’ve all seen the commercials to go to your doctor. But where does your computer go when it suffers from desktopdysfunction? There’s no self help groups, no printed literature. All it can do is surf the net and hope for an antidote to the new patch you’ve installed. The one which was supposed to increase memory and speed, but which instead creates internet impotence. Maybe somewhere there’s a cure, but until there’s a celebrity spokesperson or a telethon to raise funds and awareness, what’s a lowly desktop to do? It’s hard-breaking… Etymology:<\/em> Desktop ((computer science) the area of the screen in graphical user interfaces against which icons and windows appear) & Dysfunction ((medicine) any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part). Play on erectile dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man’s inability to have or maintain an erection)<\/p>\n

Created by:<\/em> Nosila.<\/p>\n

Upgreyed<\/strong>: \/uhp grayd<\/em>\/ she started the upgrade five hours and the screen was still upgreyed. Etymology:<\/em> upgrade greyed Created by:<\/em> galwaywegian.<\/p>\n

Floptimize<\/strong>: \/flop-tim-eyes<\/em>\/ The decision to floptimize my computer was a wrong one, seeing as it can now barely perform addition. Etymology:<\/em> Flop-optimize Created by:<\/em> FreakyDeak.<\/p>\n

\n

Comments on Floptimize:<\/strong><\/p>\n

FreakyDeak<\/a><\/strong>, 2010-09-08: 02:53:00<\/em>
It was either this or stoptimize<\/p>\n

galwaywegian<\/a><\/strong>, 2010-09-08: 08:57:00<\/em>
nice<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Arthridical<\/strong>: \/<\/em>\/ You have an arthridical patient. Etymology:<\/em> Created by:<\/em> letty.<\/p>\n

To see more verboticisms for this definition go to:

\nhttps:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/verboticisms.php?jid=update<\/a><\/p>\n

Be Creative, <\/p>\n

James<\/p>\n

www.verbotomy.com<\/a>
\nthe create-a-word game<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software “upgrade”. VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers) Desktopdysfunction: \/desk top dis funk shun\/ You know … Continue reading Desktopdysfunction: I don’t let my laptop date!<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[90,83,82,93,84,89,27],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1022"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1022"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1022\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1022"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1022"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1022"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}