{"id":1336,"date":"2011-11-08T12:00:11","date_gmt":"2011-11-08T17:00:11","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/?p=1336"},"modified":"2011-11-08T12:00:11","modified_gmt":"2011-11-08T17:00:11","slug":"hapline-please-listen-carefully-as-our-menu-has-recently-changed","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/?p=1336","title":{"rendered":"Hapline: Please listen carefully as our menu has recently changed&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>DEFINITION:<\/strong> <em>v.<\/em> To call a phone &#8220;help line&#8221; and spend 45 minutes pushing buttons and screaming at dumb voice-recognition system, before being automatically disconnected. <em>n.<\/em> A push-button or voice-activated phone menu system designed to irritate those who use it. <\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" src=\"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/jimage400\/pushed.gif\" alt=\"Please listen carefully as our menu has recently changed...\" width=\"400\" height=\"400\" \/><\/p>\n<p><strong>VERBOTICISMS:<\/strong> <em>(Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>Hapline<\/strong>:  \/<em>hap-line<\/em>\/ I called up customer service trying to resolve my issue.  Navigating the Indo-audio maze, I eventually surrendered to the hapline and just hung up. <em>Etymology:<\/em>  hapless- ill fated + helpline- customer service via phone <em>Created by:<\/em> youmustvotenato.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Vexchange<\/strong>:  \/<em>veks chaynj<\/em>\/ When Rory got the usual runaround on the voice-activated system of his telephone provider, he went crazy pushing numbers, trying to connect to the complaint department.  He figured that this was their main vexchange and it took him 20 minutes of phone aggro before he was finally cut off.  It is just as well that he did not reach a real human voice, as he would then have discovered that the agent worked half a world away and spoke English he had just learned in the past 6 months!Ma Bell was now Ma Dumbbell in his books. <em>Etymology:<\/em>  Vex (cause annoyance in; disturb, especially by minor irritations)&amp; Exchange (a workplace that serves as a telecommunications facility where lines from telephones can be connected together to permit communication)<br \/>\n <em>Created by:<\/em> Nosila.<\/p>\n<p>To see more verboticisms for this definition go to:<br \/> <br \/>\n<a href=\"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/verboticisms.php?jid=pushed\">https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/verboticisms.php?jid=pushed<\/a><\/p>\n<p>Be Creative, <\/p>\n<p>James<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"http:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\">www.verbotomy.com<\/a><br \/>\nthe create-a-word game<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>DEFINITION: v. To call a phone &#8220;help line&#8221; and spend 45 minutes pushing buttons and screaming at dumb voice-recognition system, before being automatically disconnected. n. A push-button or voice-activated phone menu system designed to irritate those who use it. VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers) Hapline: \/hap-line\/ I called up customer service trying &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/?p=1336\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Hapline: Please listen carefully as our menu has recently changed&#8230;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[3],"tags":[90,83,82,93,84,89,27],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1336"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1336"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1336\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1336"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1336"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.verbotomy.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1336"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}