DEFINITION: v. To injure yourself while performing a normal everyday activity, such bending down, standing up, or turning your head quickly. n. An self-inflicted injury which occurred during a period of physical inactivity, and so is somewhat embarrassing to explain.
VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)
Harmiliate: /harm ill ee ate/ Stanley felt like he was born with a large “L” for Loser on his forehead. No one could harmiliate themself the way he could. He had lost every job he had ever worked at and injured himself over and over in the process. Like the time he got 3rd degree burns working at a fast food place, bobbing for French fries. Or the time he crashed his taxi cab by backing up at great speed into the police car that had pulled him over for speeding. The impact had caused him to crack his nose open on his own steering wheel and get 2 black eyes. Or the time he was sitting on the glass of the office photocopier to copy his bare bum, when the glass shattered and splintered into his flesh.
Or the time he had worked at the bowling alley and got his fingers stuck in the holes of the ball that he was demonstrating for some kids. He went flying down the alley and into the pinsetter machine. He now knew where the terms “spare tire”,”gutter mouth”, “pins & needles” and “split lip” came from.
Yes, Stanley spent so much time at the local emergency room, that the staff had bought him his own coffee mug, just so they could take turns cracking up over his incident reports. But all that was about to change. Stanley had been hired to do his dream job. No more harmiliation for him…it would be someone else’s turn. Yes, Stanley had been hired as a consultant for the Workers Compensation Board! Etymology: harm (any physical damage to the body caused by violence or accident or fracture etc. or the act of damaging something or someone) & humiliate (cause to feel shame; hurt the pride of or embarrass)
Created by: Nosila.
Comments on Harmiliate:
pieceof314, 2008-04-15: 13:17:00
Yes, but will Stanley now get a paper cut on his eye, stab himself with stapler, or even smash his finger on the copy machine lid?
Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:41:00
Most likely given his track record…I forgot about the time he worked at the butchers and accidentally backed up into the meat grinder, which made him get a little behind in his work…Cheers!
Mustang, 2008-04-16: 05:15:00
Good one!
Accedentary: /ack-said-in-tear-ree/ The first thing Robert noticed when he regained consciousness after the accedentary was that he had lost the race. Then he noticed the large glinting shards of the glass coffee table, reflecting images of tiny go-carts zooming past an imaginary camera. He slowly righted himself, his face crusted in blood and glass. There on the screen, displayed in repeating 1080p glory was the turn on Koopa Troopa Beach where he had lost the entire affair. Upon hitting the shortcut ramp dead on and rocketing into the dank tunnel, his excitement overwhelmed him, and with his hands thrust toward the heavens, mocking Zeus with his three-proged controller like a vengeful Poseidon brandishing his trident, he knew he alone reigned over this beach. Every crab and palm tree must now pay fealty to his awesome might. He triggered his stored lightning item for effect and basked in the power. And that was when he had the stroke. Etymology: accident + sedentary Created by: Banky.
Comments on Accedentary:
Jabberwocky, 2008-04-15: 10:49:00
clever
Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:52:00
Great story
Inadvertadent: /in-ad-vert-eh-dent/ You would think Roger would have been better served if he had stayed in bed this morning. Or perhaps that wouldn’t have mattered either. That is because Roger was a schlemiel. It seemed as if every normal everyday thing he did, he got injured. He was so clumsy that the he didn’t have to show his insurance card at the local hospital. In fact, the emergency room looked more like the bar at Cheers whenever he was rolled in for some inadvertadent, real or imagined. They couldn’t wait to hear what mundane activity happened this time. Would it be his toothbrush needing to be removed from deep within his nasal cavity, like the last time he came? There was a running bet within the facility. Etymology: inadvertent, not attentive; heedless + accident, something that happens by chance, mishap Created by: arrrteest.
Comments on Inadvertadent:
Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:44:00
Haven’t we all known guys like Roger…good story.
Magnedent: /mag neh dent/ Phil was a congenital magnadent. To say he was accident prone would be an understatement. Accidents seemed to find him in the most mundane and safe places. It was a good thing he had insurance, because otherwise he’s be in quite a bind. His policy has several riders on it that prohibit him from climbing steps, riding bikes with any amount of wheels, crossing the street, eating while walking, and hundreds of other scenarios that indicate a troubled past. Etymology: magnet + accident Created by: pieceof314.
Comments on Magnedent:
Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:49:00
Phil probably could not walk past a fridge without sticking to it…Good One!
To see more verboticisms for this definition go to:
https://www.verbotomy.com/verboticisms.php?jid=crash
Be Creative,
James
www.verbotomy.com
the create-a-word game
Definition Comments:
Verbotomy – 2008-04-15: 00:01:00
Today’s definition was suggested by Tigger. Thank you Tigger. ~ James
Banky – 2008-04-15: 15:48:00
Excellent definition, Tigger. I actually had this happen before one of my first dates with my wife, and I didn’t tell her the real story until a couple months after we were married.
Verbotomy – 2008-04-15: 18:24:00
Hey Banky, what was the injury? And how did you hide it from your future wife? ~ James
Tigger – 2008-04-15: 22:43:00
Oh, good words everyone. I couldn’t wait to get home and see what everyone came up with. I’m currently nursing a pulled stomach muscle that I got while I was reaching for the phone, when I happened to sneeze at the same time. So, I’m the idiot that inspired the definition.
