Verboticisms

Created by: balku4

Pronunciation: pai-nohr-mee-ca-le-si-stic

Sentence: i got Painormicalasistic yesterday by jumping up and down.

Etymology: none

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: dor/mi/dent

Sentence: Last week I went to bed perfectly normal, but sometime during the night I had a dormident and woke up with severe back pains and it took me fifteen minutes to get out of bed.

Etymology: dormant + accident (an unfortunate event in the act of doing something)- dormident (an unfortunate event in the act of doing nothing)

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: orto-BASH-full

Sentence: "Have you been in a car accident?" she asked on seeing the family with plaster casts, limps and bruises. Autobashfully he replied, "no we were just having a cup of tea on the verandah when the kids called the dog and it came charging up, knocking me off my seat. I stood up pushing the table back and it fell through the decking and down went the rest of the family too".

Etymology: auto (self) + bash (hit hard) + bashful (embarrassed)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: mort - iff - im - payrd

Sentence: Morton was completely mortifimpaired, suffering both injury and embarrassment at his being wheelchair bound thru an injury acquired during foolish horseplay.

Etymology: Blend of mortified and impaired.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: harm ill ee ate

Sentence: Stanley felt like he was born with a large "L" for Loser on his forehead. No one could harmiliate themself the way he could. He had lost every job he had ever worked at and injured himself over and over in the process. Like the time he got 3rd degree burns working at a fast food place, bobbing for French fries. Or the time he crashed his taxi cab by backing up at great speed into the police car that had pulled him over for speeding. The impact had caused him to crack his nose open on his own steering wheel and get 2 black eyes. Or the time he was sitting on the glass of the office photocopier to copy his bare bum, when the glass shattered and splintered into his flesh. Or the time he had worked at the bowling alley and got his fingers stuck in the holes of the ball that he was demonstrating for some kids. He went flying down the alley and into the pinsetter machine. He now knew where the terms "spare tire","gutter mouth", "pins & needles" and "split lip" came from. Yes, Stanley spent so much time at the local emergency room, that the staff had bought him his own coffee mug, just so they could take turns cracking up over his incident reports. But all that was about to change. Stanley had been hired to do his dream job. No more harmiliation for him...it would be someone else's turn. Yes, Stanley had been hired as a consultant for the Workers Compensation Board!

Etymology: harm (any physical damage to the body caused by violence or accident or fracture etc. or the act of damaging something or someone) & humiliate (cause to feel shame; hurt the pride of or embarrass)

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COMMENTS:

Yes, but will Stanley now get a paper cut on his eye, stab himself with stapler, or even smash his finger on the copy machine lid? - pieceof314, 2008-04-15: 13:17:00

Most likely given his track record...I forgot about the time he worked at the butchers and accidentally backed up into the meat grinder, which made him get a little behind in his work...Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-04-15: 20:41:00

Good one! - Mustang, 2008-04-16: 05:15:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hak sid dent

Sentence: Although in full body cast after his mishap, Steve was lucky to be alive. He had accessed secret Defense Dept. records and his hackcident was as a result of a professional visit by some burly, zealous Marine MP's. Semper Fi!

Etymology: Hack (To gain access to (a computer file or network) illegally or without authorization) & Accident (a mishap; especially one causing injury or death)

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Created by: dochanne

Pronunciation: Ped-est-rain

Sentence: Greg lived a very beige life and enjoyed it's banality. He went to work, did his grocery shopping and walked his dog. He occasionally visited family and had dinner with friends but that was the extent of his excitement. Greg was a cautious man who didn't want to get hurt, so no snow-boarding, rollerblading or motorbike riding for him. "Oh my god what happened to you?" blabbered his secretary Janine when he came in for work in casts one day. "I slipped down the stairs with my groceries when my dog ran passed me out the door. The detergent bottle I had bought burst open and I slid and fell all the way from the sixth floor to the foyer in the detergent." He said blandly. Janine burst out laughing. "And then I crashed into the floral display, which fell on me. The rose thorns got stuck in my skin." "Wow." Said Janine giggling. "That's a real pedestrain," but Greg didn't get it.

Etymology: Pedestrian - banal, boring, hum-drum, mundane, insipid and prosaic. Also referring to the boring act of walking somewhere.. Strain - injury usually induced by using a part of your body in a way it's not used to. Also happens when you're doing very little but doing it alot. I note that this verbotomy is found quite frequently on google due to the sad fact that many people can't spell pedestrian. I think that makes it all the more poignant.

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Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: ax-e-dumb

Sentence: After tying my shoes, I stood up too fast and got an accidumb as my leg cramped up.

Etymology: accident+dumb

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: zip lash

Sentence: When Henry accidentally caught himself in the fly of his pants(ouch), he jerked his head down so quickly to see what he had done, that he gave himself ziplash.

Etymology: Zip (zipper, fly, fastener of clothing) & Whiplash (an injury to the neck as a result of rapid acceleration or deceleration)

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: in/jur/sheea

Sentence: Mark suffered from chronic injurtia. He often injured himself surfing the internet or changing stations on the remote.

Etymology: injure + inertia

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