DEFINITION: v. intr. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to pay attention.
VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)
Agendabender: /ah jenda ben der/ Todd was a first class Agendabender. He hated meetings with a passion and felt they were a waste of time. Sometimes they had meetings just to decide when the next meeting would be! He was considered a renegade for not wanting to attend the meetings, he felt it cut into his time at work. Iromically, those persons who convened meetings ad nauseum, just want to hear their own voices and ideas and apparently did not have enough real work to do, nor deadlines to meet. Todd analyzed what these meetings comprised: “Minutes” of the meetings should actually be called “Hours”; The “Board Room” should have been renamed The “Bored Room”; the “Chair Person” should be called the “Stare Person”…’cause they always managed to spear the attendees with their eyes; and Preparation for a meeting?…the only one anyone really needed was “Preparation H” for the long periods of time spent sitting on the hard wooden chairs! Yes, it was obvious to Todd that some people in his firm got their MBA’s specializing in congregation and mind-numbing rhetoric. Unbeknownst to the other attendees, Todd’s days attending these mindless marathons were soon to be ended. He had just inherited the company from his uncle and his first order of business would be to agendabender the hell out of these pointless meetings! Etymology: agenda { a list of matters to be taken up (as at a meeting)} & bender (someone who modifies the rules to suit themselves) & genderbender (for rhyming purposes, not that there’s anything wrong with that!) Created by: Nosila.
Comments on Agendabender:
silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 01:35:00
I admire your witty word plays in quotes, and your story, for they very humorously and successfully convey the feeling of frustration. Perhaps before his agendabender to ease his frustration, he went on another kind of bender!OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 02:26:00
Perhaps Todd is a “Boy George” fan? Clever word; luv the sentence!
Contratendant: /ˈkän-trÉ™-ˈten-dÉ™nt/ Lars spent the entire meeting paging through the Wall Street Journal and humming absently to himself, to his son’s 5th grade teacher’s great consternation. “Mr. Beauregard!” she exclaimed, “I can’t believe you would be such a contratendant to this parent-teacher conference!” Etymology: From the Greek, contra, meaning an illegal association with a Middle-Eastern dictatorship; from the Kusumapura, ten, meaning “of brace-wearing age”; and from the Irish, dant, meaning, “shall not,” or, literally, “dare not.” Created by: doseydotes.
Comments on Contratendant:
stache, 2008-03-24: 14:30:00
Your etymologies are always so very enlightening. Superlatively done. Keep up the good work!OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:50:00
Close to the mark!
Spectraitor: /spec-tray-tur/ John attended the morning meeting merely as a spectraitor. He successfully sabotaged establishing the agenda for the day. Etymology: spectator (onlooker) + traitor (subversive element) Created by: Jabberwocky.
Comments on Spectraitor:
silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:32:00
Wow! I admire the way you select words and put them together in your sentence and verboticisms so that we don’t just read and understand … they also evoke feelings and emotions … of all kinds. Not only is your sentence and word right on the definition, but evokes that antipathy we all feel when it happens. Outstanding verboticism!OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:49:00
Cleverly constructed word.Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:16:00
…now if he could only get the competition to pay him for sabotaging the meetings. Hmmm. Nice word!
Muteinear: /mutineer/ Lara’s selective deafness was not causing as much of a problem in the Dyslexia Association meetings as she would have liked. As a muteinear she had only lent half an ear to proceedings and the minutes she prepared appeared to be written in anagrams. She thought this would show them all the contempt she felt for the meetings. However, as most of the attendees were dyslexic they found her anagramatic minutes actually made easy reading. Etymology: mute (not speaking as one does in a meeting) + in ear (not listening either) + mutineer (one who rebels) + the whole word looks like the minutes have been sabotaged to make them difficult to read. Created by: petaj.
Comments on Muteinear:
silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 01:47:00
I admire the interplay between your pronunciation and etymology as well as the words you chose to blend so cleverly and the way you defined them. Muteinear and mutineer really nailed the definition, too. Outstanding word!petaj, 2008-03-24: 06:33:00
Minuteering can be as difficult as climbing a mountain! when you have a mute in ear. Thanks silvery for the thoughtful comments you make on verbotomies.purpleartichokes, 2008-03-24: 08:29:00
Great word!Tigger, 2008-03-24: 21:19:00
Dyslexics Untie! Funny sentence, petaj.
To see more verboticisms for this definition go to:
https://www.verbotomy.com/verboticisms.php?jid=board
Be Creative,
James
www.verbotomy.com
the create-a-word game
Definition Comments:
Verbotomy – 2008-03-24: 00:01:00
Today’s definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ Jamesarrrteest – 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:Meeting Hell
By David E. SelvinAs I sit here in this meeting,
My mind’s attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.But from the clock, it’s click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.Still, although, I’m stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out “dead,”
An indication not all is well.I’m not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it’s pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.
Verbotomy – 2008-03-24: 08:40:00
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ JamesJamagra – 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, “Nevermore!”silveryaspen – 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!silveryaspen – 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I’m so glad you shared it with us.arrrteest – 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/”trainings” that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with “activators,” “capture sheets” and “group participation.” Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let’s just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don’t sit next to me. LOL!purpleartichokes – 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.Jamagra – 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!arrrteest – 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
“inherent”-ah an errant moment