Vote for the best verboticism.

'Our boss said I had to attend this meeting.'

DEFINITION: v. To arrive at a meeting completely unprepared and then work diligently and obviously to distract yourself from the proceedings. n. A person who attends a meeting but does not believe that they are paid enough to actually pay attention.

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Verboticisms

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Brattendee

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: brat-tend-dee

Sentence: At every meeting, except for those where pastries were served, Joel was either the designated particican't or brattendee, believing he was worth more to the company due to his liberal arts education and extensive sales experience at Toys 'R' Us.

Etymology: brat, attendee

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COMMENTS:

Joel sounds like one who could be destined for fame and fortune.....among Hollywood's 'intellectual elite'. - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 05:45:00

Brings new meaning to the expression toy boy. Great choice of words and great job of blending them. Brat fits plus brings out all those feelings that go with it. Using 'brat' in your verboticism was brilliant! Exceptional verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 10:38:00

Good one and an added bonus of particican't. Love it. - arrrteest, 2008-03-24: 11:34:00

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Doesntapplytameister

Created by: diyan627

Pronunciation: doesn't apply ta meister

Sentence: Rachna arrived at the meeting 10 minutes late sipping on her Starbucks coffee from a green straw, and set her cell phone on the conference table. Meanwhile the rest of us were contemplating how to merge the access databases so as to not lose the 10 months of research data and who was going to work on making the copies of the files before the merge. Her cell phone rang, and she excused herself. By the time she came back, we had assigned her a large portion of the inter-rater reliability data entry. After the meeting, she complained, "I have a Masters degree in public health; I shouldn't have to do data entry!" The Doesntapplytameister has been getting stuck with all the dirty work for so long now, and she can't quite figure out why.

Etymology: does not apply + to + me + meister

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Recalcityroaf

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: ree-cal-sit-TIE-roaf (recalcityroafette)

Sentence: The Library Dominatrix had forced Jeff to abandon his personal feifdom and attend a typically bogus meeting at the Megastructure. Unkemp and unconcerned, Jeff was only a RECALCI-TYROAF compared to the rest of us who had suffered through endless vapid meetings totally devoid of meaning or productivity. Jeff's casual insolence marked him for what he was...a mere amateur at the subtle art of boss-baiting. His five-minute Pornopoint Presentation only brought him a week in the cooler. Years of administrative harassment had converted our workplace into an academic version of a prisoner of war camp, and our subtle sarcasm, subliminal suggestions and underground campaign of disinformation had led to the total breakdown of more than one camp administrator. Totally lacking subtlety, Jeff's blatant insolence and goon-baiting drew the Commandant's attention while we discreetly falsified memos, released budgies, and planted several alarm clocks timed to disrupt our annual Staff Appreciation Day. So even a RECALCI-TYROAF has a place in the great SCHEME of things. They never DID discover the tunnel.

Etymology: RECALCItrant+TYRo+OAF=RECALCITYROAF....RECALCITRANT:: obstinately defiant of authority or restraint,difficult to manage or train,not responsive to treatment; Late Latin recalcitrant-, recalcitrans, present participle of recalcitrare to be stubbornly disobedient, from Latin, to kick back, from re- + calcitrare to kick, from calc-, calx heel.....TYRO:a beginner in learning,one inept at insubordination;Medieval Latin, from Latin tiro young soldier, tyro.....OAF:a stupid person, a boob,a big clumsy slow-witted person; alteration of auf, alfe goblin's child, probably from Middle English alven, elven elf, fairy, from Old English elfen nymphs; akin to Old English ælf elf.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Rats! The word "city" seems too pronounced- I wanted more emphasis on "tyro". I'll try to do better, gang. - metrohumanx, 2009-01-14: 01:21:00

metrohumanx Free online books here: http://www.gutenberg.org/catalog/ - metrohumanx, 2009-01-14: 02:05:00

I tried to say that three times and broke my tongue....but I still like it. - Mustang, 2009-01-14: 17:57:00

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Misfittendee

Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: miss-fit-tend-he

Sentence: There is always some misfittendee there who is obviously not with the program.

Etymology: misfit+attendee

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Dissforum

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Diss-for-rum

Sentence: Tony thought he was worth much more than his salary so when he had to attend a meeting he decided he would dissforum it by attending but paying no attention whatsoever.

Etymology: Diss(disrespect) + Forum(a meeting or exchange of views) = Dissforum

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COMMENTS:

as soon as I saw your word I thought of decorum which would work well in your etymology - great word - Jabberwocky, 2009-01-14: 16:17:00

Great create! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-15: 01:41:00

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Attentiondeficitdisbursement

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: at/ten/sion/de/fi/cit/dis/burse/ment

Sentence: Whenever Joe showed up at a meeting and found out that he wasn't being paid enough per hour for his computer expertise his ADD (attentiondeficitdisbursement) condition would suddenly act up until he felt he was being properly compensated.

Etymology: Whenever Joe showed up at a meeting and found out that he wasn't being paid enough per hour for his computer expertise his ADD (attentiondeficitdisbursement) condition would suddenly act up until he felt he was being properly compensated.

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Nontributor

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: non - trib - you - tore

Sentence: When Lenny didn't get the raise he thought he deserved, he became a nontributor at all of the meetings he was forced to attend. He brought in nothing that could be interpreted as a contribution to the meeting. Instead, he brought in crossword books, playing cards or even his Nintendo DS. Once in awhile, he would say something like "does anyone know a four letter word for someone who misbehaves in company meetings ending in the letter K?" Or "Yes, the Red Jack goes on the Black Queen", just to irritate those who made him attend.

Etymology: Contributor (To help bring about a result; act as a factor, giving in common with others for a common purpose) + Non (Negative form of a word or group of words)

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COMMENTS:

excellent - Jabberwocky, 2009-01-14: 11:31:00

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Slacktendant

Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: slak-tend-ent

Sentence: Everyone who arrived at the meeting on time took a poll as to see what Jeff would bring with him to prove he was worthy of his slacktendant title. Two out of the four members who were there thought he would bring a copy of the latest anime or manga magazine he was sharing with Whistler from accounting. One said he would probably write emails and text his girlfriend on his Blackberry, while another said it had been a while since the last time he clipped his fingernails and toenails and plucked his nosehairs. Last Monday he brought the New York Times crossword puzzle and kept shouting out the words when he got them or muttering the clues under his breath.

Etymology: slacker (one who shirks work) + attendant (one who is present)

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COMMENTS:

Your sentence and word fit together, and fit the definition, like a hand in a glove Very well done! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-24: 01:40:00

You've no doubt met my brother in law, Mervyn? Great word! - Mustang, 2008-03-24: 06:13:00

Sorry, Mustang, I misspelled 'Mervyn' in my sentence. - stache, 2008-03-24: 10:10:00

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Innattention

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: In at ten shun

Sentence: Oliver worked for Hilton Hotel Chain as it's IT Chief. He never felt he had to be part of the boring day-to-day matters. Holding them hostage with his superior electronic intelligence, he attended the meetings he was summoned to and ignored everyone and everything. He was guilty of innattention. In fact he had a history of it...when he worked for the sanitation department, he was guilty of binattention. When he worked for the Symphony, it was violinattention; for Lufthansa, it was berlinattention. And when he worked for Tanqueray, he was guilty of ginattention; for the bank, pinattention and for the Las Vegas Tourist Board, it was sinattention. Do you think this is maybe why he'd been fired so often?

Etymology: Inn (hotel) & Inattention (lack of attention)

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Contratendant

Created by: doseydotes

Pronunciation: ˈkän-trə-ˈten-dənt

Sentence: Lars spent the entire meeting paging through the Wall Street Journal and humming absently to himself, to his son's 5th grade teacher's great consternation. "Mr. Beauregard!" she exclaimed, "I can't believe you would be such a contratendant to this parent-teacher conference!"

Etymology: From the Greek, contra, meaning an illegal association with a Middle-Eastern dictatorship; from the Kusumapura, ten, meaning "of brace-wearing age"; and from the Irish, dant, meaning, "shall not," or, literally, "dare not."

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COMMENTS:

Your etymologies are always so very enlightening. Superlatively done. Keep up the good work! - stache, 2008-03-24: 14:30:00

Close to the mark! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-24: 19:50:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-24: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 07:46:00
This is a poem I actually wrote in a meeting:

Meeting Hell
By David E. Selvin

As I sit here in this meeting,
My mind's attention span is fleeting,
I contemplate actually retreating,
From this place in meeting hell.

But from the clock, it's click and clocking,
My state of mind, it keeps on mocking,
My inner scream, to me, is shocking,
As I hallucinate the ending bell.

Still, I came with no allusion,
Complicit in my blind collusion,
For my schedule’s planned intrusion,
That I’ve come to accept, but dread.

I arrive and check the seating,
Politely smile and say a greeting,
Knowing sanity will take a beating,
Within the confines of my weary head.

Still, although, I'm stuck here sitting,
My stomach lining must be pitting,
A straight jacket soon just might be fitting,
And only time will surely tell.

I hope a response is not required,
They might notice sanity expired,
And ability to reason duly mired,
My interest level a labored sell.

I awake: Is it a nightmare?
I catch myself with an insipid blank stare,
Hearing talking though the stale air,
Not all sure where it’s coming from.

Try to focus. What is the topic?
The planner’s plans were quite myopic,
My mind is on an island tropic,
My body sits here limp and numb.

I hope I don’t get called to answer,
My pulse would rise as if a dancer,
My body pained as if full with cancer,
Reacting like a hammered thumb.

A sympathetic nod of head,
Seems to follow just what is said,
But an EEG would read out "dead,"
An indication not all is well.

I'm not sure what I gain from training,
For what topic that it's pertaining,
The whole experience is very draining,
My angst is what I need to quell.
My angst is what I need to quell.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-24: 08:40:00
Excellent poem arrrteest! It insubordinuttily captures the disenwaged spirit of a slacktendant agendabender. ~ James

Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 09:19:00
Quoth the employee, "Nevermore!"

silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:07:00
Remistram and James, your definition and cartoon are a big hit! They not only inspired great verboticisms (not a bad one in the bunch again) but even poetry! Laughter, too! Great job!

silveryaspen - 2008-03-24: 11:10:00
Did you write your poem in a meeting hell, arrrteest? It is a wonderfully well done rhyme and adds much to our time here today! I'm so glad you shared it with us.

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 13:36:00
Write it in meeting hell? Yes, I did! It was a mind numbing, pointless, poorly thought out, going through the motions, no followthrough afterwards, dead in the water, series of meetings/"trainings" that is enherent within large organizations. It was complete with "activators," "capture sheets" and "group participation." Aaaah phoey. You bet. Am I sarred for life? Well let's just say the poem saved me from $$$$ of therapy. If you want to be productive and positive in a meeting, don't sit next to me. LOL!

purpleartichokes - 2008-03-24: 16:00:00
Great poem arrrteest! I think I was at that meeting.

Jamagra - 2008-03-24: 16:41:00
Wow Arteest! Glad you have writing as an outlet from meeting hell! I really do NOT miss those days!

arrrteest - 2008-03-24: 17:22:00
"inherent"-ah an errant moment

wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:40:00
but your word is not in your sentence...

wayoffcenter - 2009-01-14: 04:46:00
Sorry, comment in wrong spot (and I used to laugh at people who made this mistake) Comment was meant for Illoiterite.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-31: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James