Tag: Verbotomy

DEFINITION: n. A momentary feeling of relief mixed with lingering dread, which occurs when your boss marches past the piles of unfinished work on your desk.

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Loproductingle: /lo-PROD-uct-EEN-gull/ Sensing an evil presence nearby, Casper threw a spreadsheet over his Minesweeper game just in time to see the Library Director sweep past like the grim fog from a defiled graveyard.
Slowly, a LOPRODUCTINGLE spread over him as every cell in his database quivered like a child caught in a lie.
“I hope you’re working on those usage reports.” Pat said with a pseudofriendly voice that belied the hateful look in her cold grey administrative eye. “OH YEAH !” He stammered, only to regret his lack of a more creative reply. Casper’s eyes never wandered from the monitor until she floated wraith-like into her office. Relieved that the moment had passed, he began to relax, but the LOPRODUCTINGLE returned like the rising tide of fear he felt in his coffee-filled bladder. An out-of-body sensation stupefied his mind as he catalogued all the woes this encounter could bring to his pleasantly mundane life. He minimized the screen which mocked his defiance and resumed play in the minefield of academic employment…
Etymology: LOw+PRODUCTivity+tINGLE=LOPRODUCTINGLE
low: relatively small BS output….
productivity: a measure of useful work….tingle: to feel a ringing, stinging, prickling, or thrilling sensation Created by: metrohumanx.

Comments on Loproductingle:

metrohumanx, 2008-08-04: 06:33:00
The above incident is a product of fiction and bears no resemblance to any persons, living or undead.

metrohumanx, 2008-08-04: 06:34:00
http://www.ifla.org/I/humour/humour.htm

metrohumanx, 2008-08-04: 06:35:00
Live it or live WITH it!

metrohumanx, 2008-08-04: 06:44:00
WOW! Verbotomists get up pretty early !

Nosila, 2008-08-04: 17:52:00
Loproductingle…I thought it was a stroke (of genius!)

Nosila, 2008-08-04: 23:39:00
Some of us verbotimists go to bed late…depends on your time zone!

Wordotwist, 2008-08-05: 10:56:00
Sounds like a jingle!

Squirmpile: /SKWURM-pahyl/ As files began to stack higher and higher in Bob’s in-tray, fellow workers realized that it was a clever ploy to avoid the boss’s glare and hide his own squirmpile. Etymology: SQUIRM: to feel or display discomfort or distress, as from reproof, embarrassment, pain, etc & PILE: an assemblage of things laid or lying one upon the other: a pile of papers. Created by: OZZIEBOB.

Comments on Squirmpile:

metrohumanx, 2008-08-04: 06:40:00
SQUIRMPILE…disturbingly vivid image.

pungineer, 2008-08-04: 09:18:00
Is that also what you get from cold office chairs and too many donut runs?

Nosila, 2008-08-04: 17:48:00
Good word…I think most people have squirmpiles at work!

Perplexfiles: /pur plecks fyles/ Suzy had that perplexfiles feeling again. What to hide away, what to look busy doing and what to let her boss see her working on. Her boss, Alvin, was on one of his rampages again. It was his idea of motivating and supervising his staff, he thought. He’d roam through the office, looking for flaws and then act all dramatic about what he found. Most of the staff kept out of his way when he went on these rants…bathroom breaks, lunch at 10:00 am or going to that doctor’s appointment. Alvin was such a diva, like he was the one upon whom all productivity depended. Luckily for Suzy and staff, he only did it when he was sober, so it did not happen very often! Etymology: perplex (bewildering, mystery,complcated) & files (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & for rhyming X Files (The truth is out there…I want to believe…) Created by: Nosila.

Comments on Perplexfiles:

metrohumanx, 2008-08-04: 06:38:00
The grunts are gruntled. Good worl, Nosila!

pungineer, 2008-08-04: 09:22:00
It must be a case for Moldy & Scolder!

Shirkload: /shirk+load/ Elijah realised the open plan office vortex of no to slow productivity had struck again and that there were actual dust particles on the shirkload piled up on his desk. The Henderson files on the top were supposed to have been completed an hour ago and on the bosses’ desk by now – ‘Oh look a paper clip on the floor!’ – he dived and held his breath as his stomach churned – he could smell the halitosis…his boss was back from lunch… Etymology: shirk – to avoid honest toil
+ load – a unit of honest toil
[used as a noun and or a verb – a heavy shirkload or to be caught shirkloading]
Created by: pungineer.

Comments on Shirkload:

metrohumanx, 2008-08-04: 06:42:00
SHIRKLOAD- nice ring to it…

To see more verboticisms for this definition go to:

https://www.verbotomy.com/verboticisms.php?jid=gust

Be Creative,

James

www.verbotomy.com
the create-a-word game

DEFINITION: n An invented language similar to baby talk, used by pet owners to communicate with their pets. v. tr. To speak to an animal using such a language.

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Animalate: /an-uh-muhl-ate/ Sophie was proud of the way she could animalate with her dog. “Who’s a good boy?” Why you are my poopy doo..YES YOU ARE!” Give mommy kisses” OH such big, sloppy, puppy kisses! Yes they are…Oh YES THEY ARE! Etymology: Blend of animal and relate Created by: hooterbug.

Schmalliewallieschmoopsdedo: /Fuckin sound it out!/ Jesus, if I type this sentence for reals, I’ll never get laid again. Etymology: Meet me and my bitch, appearing in Austin.
704 bitches Created by: idavecook.

Geekinese: /geek-in-eez/ As far as after school jobs go, Sheila was happy enough at PetsRUs. She didn’t really mind the poop runs, or even hosing down the cages. There were days however, when she felt if one more potential buyer stood at the puppy window tapping and speaking geekinese, that she would definitely fill out an app over at Orange Julius! Etymology: geek: A person with an unusual or odd personality.

ese: Suffix meaning the language or dialect of.
Created by: lumina.

Comments on Geekinese:

Nosila, 2008-08-03: 00:51:00
OMG talk about Pulp Friction…at least at OJ they only pups she’d see would be Pizza Dogs!

Pronehoundsiation: /prone hownd see ashun/ Maggie used pronehoundsiation when speaking to her pet dogs. She was sure they had a simpler grasp of our language and therefore litterally spoke to all of them as though they were stupid, hard of hearing and/or impervious to the teasing of other pets. Her schmoogie-woogie Schnauzer; her oodly-noodly Poodle; her chewzie-woozie Chihuahua; her orky-dorky Yorky and her musky-wusky Husky were all equally embarrassed by her linguistic torture. So they made a pact, every time Maggie used her verbal offensives on them, they would respond in cat-talk. When she used her endearments on them, they would reply with various impersonations of “Meow” “Mew” “Yowww” “SSSSSSSSSSS” and “NoooWWWWW”. Maggie was so impressed that she bragged to her friends that her dogs had become bilingual. Isn’t that itty, bitty, kitty nifty??? Who’s feline better? Etymology: Pronunciation (the manner in which someone utters a word)& Hound ( any of several breeds of dog) Created by: Nosila.

Comments on Pronehoundsiation:

metrohumanx, 2008-08-01: 06:26:00
PRONEHOUNDSIATION ! PEALS of uproarious laughter, Nosila.

To see more verboticisms for this definition go to:

https://www.verbotomy.com/verboticisms.php?jid=puppy

Be Creative,

James

www.verbotomy.com
the create-a-word game

DEFINITION: n. A self-image disorder characterized by an inability look at, share, or even recognize pictures of yourself, unless they have been photoshopped to perfection.

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Mugsaphobia: /mugz a fo beea/ COP:”Name?”
FRED:”Prints Charming”
COP: “Funny…that’s right, we’ll need your prints, Charming! Occupation?”
FRED: “Self-Photographer. Officer, What are the Charges?”
COP:”Indecent Exposure…You were seen flashing people! Your aperture was open. We are running a background check on you now. Your statements are in sharp contrast to the witness statements.”
FRED: “No, I wasn’t doing that…I was shooting myself, in order to get the most perfect image I could. You see, Officer, I suffer from a mental disorder called Mugsaphobia! It’s a rare disorder that lens itself to misunderstandings like this.”
COP:”Yeah, such a filmsy excuse and this is a Kodak moment. We’ll lock you up in a cell and see what develops!”
FRED: “No, you can’t…I’ll tell you I’ll snap! I’ll blow-up. Besides, if I have to sit in a cold cell,I’ll shutter, I’ll get polaroids!”
COP: “Don’t be so negative. Your lawyer will soon get a resolution for you, if you don’t pose any more problems for us! Quit crying and focus or you’ll get red-eye.”
FRED: “HELP, I’VE BEEN FRAMED!”

Etymology: mugs {mug shot:a photograph of someone’s face (especially one made for police records)}and phobia (an anxiety disorder characterized by extreme and irrational fear of simple things or social situations)

Created by: Nosila.

Comments on Mugsaphobia:

metrohumanx, 2008-07-31: 00:44:00
Hey, Muggsy! Good word.

OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-01: 03:23:00
Good word & interesting tale.

Pixosis: /pix-os-is/ Jenny’s psychiatrist’s treatment of pixosis was to get her, over time, to use older and older versions of Photoshop until she weaned herself of the program.

Etymology: pixel + osis Created by: Stevenson0.

Comments on Pixosis:

OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-01: 03:33:00
Clever.

metrohumanx, 2008-08-01: 06:33:00
Great treatment regimen for PIXOSIS ! I wish that cure had been available when I unfortunately tried Americansingles. (the site, not the cheese)

Photochopic: /Pho’to-chop-ick/ Suzy’s Photochopic tendencies have led to many disappointments. She couldnt quite understand why her “matches” from Hookup.com always seemed to never call her back.
**Disclaimer** While this word is somewhat similar to Adobe® Photoshop® registered trademarks or trademarks of ®Photoshop® Company® Inc®orporated® in Nigeria*, Finland® and/or any other country. Violation of this trademark may result in personal injury, death, and a poorly photoshopped picture. Say photoshop and you will go to jail. Etymology: Blend of Photograph – Chop (To cut into pieces)- Manic (outbursts of drunken violence and manic activity) Created by: hooterbug.

Comments on Photochopic:

lumina, 2008-07-31: 12:31:00
I love it!

OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-01: 03:18:00
Good one.

metrohumanx, 2008-08-01: 06:44:00
You clearly have Suzie JPegged.

happyhippy, 2008-08-01: 13:21:00
very well thought out. u seem to understand suzy better than herself woo to photochopick

Fabsnapic: /Fab-snap-ik/ As Roxie’s descended further and further into a fabsnapic starry-eyedess, her personal photo-album began resembling a who’s who of supermodels. Etymology: Blend of FABULOUS(fab:informal): Beyond belief; exceedingly great; exceptionally good; extremely pleasing; almost impossible to believe; incredible ; SNAP .n a photo; vb. to take a photo; emotionally meltdown; PIC, a picture, a photo & -IC: state or condition. Created by: OZZIEBOB.

Comments on Fabsnapic:

metrohumanx, 2008-08-01: 06:30:00
FABSNAPPIC came in late on my 486- mabye it went into da buffer. But I love it.

To see more verboticisms for this definition go to:

https://www.verbotomy.com/verboticisms.php?jid=ps

Be Creative,

James

www.verbotomy.com
the create-a-word game

DEFINITION: v. tr. To make the same mistake over and over again even though you know it’s stupid. n. A compulsively repeated mistake.

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Duhhplicate: /DUHH-PLIH-KATE/ Rosco stepped out of the minimum security correctional facility into the pounding sun.Sitting at the bus stop with his cardboard suitcase, he now had to admit that he might just “suck at life”…After three failed marriages and encounters with every known STD, he began to consider that his past dating choices may not have been the best.Foxy english professors were his weakness,but he also harbored a soft spot for lady charter boat captains,tattooed carny babes, radical Irish lassies, Goth chicks and women in any stage of recovery.But his moment of enlightenment passed like a partial eclipse,and his loneliness overtook him yet again. He would rent a room,hold up a gas station and look up his old flame Babs….Yes, that’s the ticket! He was sure she’d take him back, and together they could DUHHPLICATE all the great times they had before he got cirrohsis and she fell off the Harley.Yes! Yes! Rosco would DUHHPLICATE his old life-only this time he wouldn’t get caught. A cloud of dust enveloped the inter-city bus as it stopped in front of him,and then he saw her stumble off: the most radiant creature ever to corner the nose ring market…. Etymology: DUH+DUPLICATE
DUH:der ofr Created by: metrohumanx.

Comments on Duhhplicate:

metrohumanx, 2008-07-30: 01:16:00
http://zoomquilt.org/

lumina, 2008-07-30: 04:03:00
Who doesn’t love a tatooed carny babe? 🙂

Nosila, 2008-07-30: 20:59:00
Never a DUHll moment, eh?

Mustang, 2008-07-30: 22:14:00
Rosco was a duhhfus

OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-31: 02:25:00
I kike it.

Rebonerr: /ree bone air/ Pete Ayr was one absent-minded dude. Since his attention span was zip and he never paid attention to what he was doing, he programmed himself to rebonerr regularly. He always lost keys, forgot what to do and generally spent his days in a vortex of making goofy mistakes, from which he learned nothing. He was not always this way. His distraction was not due to chemical abuse, dementia or stupidity, but more plausibly due to being in love. He had met the woman of his dreams, Jill, and since then his head was in a swirl. His rebonerr was charming but at times annoying to Jill. As a result of his behaviour, she nick-named him Re-Pete Ayr. I guess that was better than being called Fatal Ayr. Etymology: re (do again); boner (stupid, embarrassing mistake); err (to make a mistake or be incorrect) rhymes with debonair(having a sophisticated charm-NOT!) Created by: Nosila.

Comments on Rebonerr:

hooterbug, 2008-07-30: 11:20:00
-Love it!

metrohumanx, 2008-07-30: 17:30:00
Hilarious! lovortex…been there, dumb that.

OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-31: 02:25:00
Good one.

Dumbasstrophy: /dum-bass-tro-fe/ Johnny had a dumbasstrophy when he got crabs from the same girl twice. Etymology: dumbass- english for dumbass, and trophy from catastrophy for a bad event. Created by: s6guy72.

Comments on Dumbasstrophy:

lumina, 2008-07-30: 16:55:00
Hee…that was a little “nasterous” but still funny AND great word!

metrohumanx, 2008-07-30: 17:19:00
If you get caught by the crabs twice, you deserve to die.

Numbskulligan: /-nÅ­m’skÅ­l-i-gÉ™n-/ Darrell was about to take a numbskulligan. Apparently he hadnt been convincing enough on his first try and he thought that by drinking just one more beer- he might just convince one of the fine ladies playing pool to take him home. “Alright, Gals!” Darrell staggered back over to the pool table. “Which one of you fine fillies wants to be my future ex-wife?” Darrell had a long walk home. Etymology: Blend of “Numbskull” – A stupid person; a nitwit and “Mulligan” – Most simply put, a “do-over.” Created by: hooterbug.

Comments on Numbskulligan:

metrohumanx, 2008-07-30: 17:24:00
Darrell Numbskulligan-wasn’t he related to Patty O’Furniture?

Nosila, 2008-07-30: 20:58:00
Numbskulligan has a nice ring to it!

Mustang, 2008-07-30: 22:14:00
Very good!

To see more verboticisms for this definition go to:

https://www.verbotomy.com/verboticisms.php?jid=refill

Be Creative,

James

www.verbotomy.com
the create-a-word game

DEFINITION: n. The horrible pain that comes from pulling a band-aid off of hairy skin.

VERBOTICISMS: (Invented words created by the Verbotomy Writers)

Sasquouch: /ˈsas-ËŒkwouch/ Nurse Betty motioned silently for her young Candy-Striper student nurses to gather ’round. “Sshhhhhhhh” she whispered. “Up ahead you will see a Perfect specimen of Genus Sasquouch in Room 3”. “Listen girls, as Nurse Greta removes the bandage from his hairy arm. “You will learn to identify this Medical Oddity by the upcoming scream of “Kelly Clarkson” Etymology: Sasquatch – large hairy humanoid creature said to live in wilderness areas of the United States and also known as bigfoot (pronounced big baby)and Ouch- Used to express sudden pain or displeasure Created by: hooterbug.

Comments on Sasquouch:

lumina, 2008-07-29: 12:25:00
Ha! “KELLY CLARKSON!” 🙂

Nosila, 2008-07-29: 17:19:00
Love it,hooterbug! Best One Yeti!!!

metrohumanx, 2008-07-30: 01:18:00
Positively inspired, hooterbug!

OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-30: 05:40:00
Crazy, yeti like it!

metrohumanx, 2008-07-31: 03:55:00
ABOMINABLE SHOWMAN!

Rippermortis: /rip-per-mor-tis/ Deathly afraid of rippermortis and the possibility of embarrassing himself by crying like a baby, John had convinced himself and others that he was just a very slow healer, very prone to infection, and in need of wearing bandaids until they fell off on their own accord. Etymology: Derived from rigor mortis: A medical condition that occurs after death and results in the stiffening of muscle mass. Created by: lumina.

Comments on Rippermortis:

metrohumanx, 2008-07-29: 02:03:00
Hahahahaa…”fell off on their own accord”…good one!

OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-30: 05:41:00
Jack the Ripper lives.

Ripillatory: /rip ill a toree/ Gavin was such a big baby about anything medical. No wonder men didn’t have the babies or the human race would have died out long ago. He fainted at the sight of blood, so Blood Bank donations were nightmares for him. The way he told it, getting a blood test was a major psychological drama for him. He’d had no choice…doctor’s orders. Get that blood test or else!
Gavin summoned what little courage he had and had the blood work done. He pressed the cotton ball on the spot and when it was deemed safe, the nurse put a bandage on the afflicted area. He was told in an hour he could remove the bandage. Sure enough, an hour later, he talked his wife into gently please removing the bandaid. Naturally, the revenge she felt for all his crybaby acts was strong, so she pulled it off fast and nasty. The ripillatory agony he experienced was only surpassed by the phone call from the lab, saying they’d accidentally dropped his blood vials and he would have to return in the morning for retests! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Etymology: rip (to tear or be torn violently;the act of rending or splitting something) & ill (an often persistent bodily disorder or disease; a cause for complaining)& depilatory (something used to remove hair;able to remove hair or render hairless)
Created by: Nosila.

Comments on Ripillatory:

metrohumanx, 2008-07-29: 01:54:00
Ripping yarn, Nosila…I like the way you worked the revenge angle in…LOL

OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-30: 05:45:00
Bloody ripping yarn.

Agonistick: /A-gon-is-stik/ Dave was such a big baby, when Lisa offered to rip his plaster off for him he sat down and made such a fuss she had to shout at him to sit still. But he kept on fidgeting as he remembered how agonistick it was the last time he had to do it, he pulled out so much hair it took weeks to grow back. Etymology: Agony(extreme suffering) ORIGIN Greek agonia from agon ‘contest’ + Stick (adhere or cause to adhere) = Agonistick Created by: TJayzz.

Comments on Agonistick:

lumina, 2008-07-29: 15:13:00
LOVE this one!

To see more verboticisms for this definition go to:

https://www.verbotomy.com/verboticisms.php?jid=bandaid

Be Creative,

James

www.verbotomy.com
the create-a-word game