Verboticisms

Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: in-ten-dun-eye-tis

Sentence: Bill was right back where he started: on the couch next to a half-eaten box of meat-lover's pizza. But this time, he was unable to lift his arm to point the remote on account of his intendonitis. You see, earlier in the day he saw an infomercial about how to lose all that flab and he decided he was motivated enough to waltz into the gym and start off where he left the last time in college 15 years and 70lbs ago. He thought he begin with benching 240, the weight he used to do, but could only muster 3 reps of 80lbs. He didn't even need to use a pin to set the weights on the equipment circuit and didn't last 5 minutes on the treadmill.

Etymology: intend, to have in mind + tendonitis, inflamation of the tendons, often because of overuse

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COMMENTS:

xcellent - galwaywegian, 2008-05-06: 07:47:00

He might finish up with Adonitis! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:47:00

Good one, as they say, the path to Hell is paved with good Intendonitis... - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 19:58:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in ex zer sha

Sentence: Randy decided that five years away from his fitness club was too long. Inspired by infomercials and a waistline that kept thickening, he decided to re-enroll and get back the hard body he once proudly showed off at the beach. He carefully parked his car as close as possible to the gym - no sense risking a fall on icy pavement before he even started. When he arrived, a cute redhead was working out on an exercise bike. Without stretching or warming up, he mounted the bike beside her and peddled like the wind. After 10 minutes, he threw his leg up to dismount and pulled his groin muscle so hard that 3 attendants had to pull him off the machine and lay him on the floor, where he waited in agony until the ambulance arrived. What did this inexertia end up costing him altogether? $100 gym fee; $500 ambulance ride;$2,500 hospital fees;$500 for pain meds; $200 for having his car towed; $500 to reclaim it later at the impound yard; new shorts $50 (the old ones had to be cut off);and a date with the cute redhead who had visions of her potential suitor being unable to give her children: Priceless!

Etymology: inertia (the tendency of a body to maintain a state of rest or uniform motion unless acted upon by an external force;a disposition to remain inactive or inert) & exertion (use of physical or mental energy; hard work)

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COMMENTS:

Makes me hurt all over just reading it. lol GOOD word!! - Mustang, 2008-05-06: 04:48:00

Oh, that's just perfect. - ErWenn, 2008-05-06: 11:24:00

Muscles come and go; flab lasts. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:46:00

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈdʒɪmˌdʒuɹ/ /JIMM-Joor/

Sentence: They told me to stay away from the free weights to avoid gymjury, but nobody warned me not to lean into the turns on the stationary bike.

Etymology: from gym + (in)jure

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COMMENTS:

you must be feeling a bit ginger after that. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 03:38:00

gym gyminie, gym gyminie, gym gymjury (where's purple when you have an annoying song reference) - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:27:00

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: strech/arms/st/rong

Sentence: Sam had a difficult time explaining why one of his arms was longer than the other after returning from his fabled lunchtime workouts. His only explanation was he stretcharmstwrong.

Etymology: stretch arms wrong + Stretch Armstrong

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /jim-PARE-ment/

Sentence: Nathan was determined to be able to squeeze himself into his old Speedo bathing suit by summer, and he returned to the gym after a five year hiatus. But, as out-of-shape as he was, he gave himself a gympairment within five minutes of beginning his workout. He was gymbarrassed and felt like a gymposter in front of all the bodybuilders who had to help carry him out to his car. He was a total gymbecile for thinking he could still bench press his body weight like he used to.

Etymology: Gym - athletic facility equipped for sports or physical training (short for gymnasium; from Greek, gymnásion "gymnastic school") + Impairment - damage that results in a reduction of strength or quality (from Middle English, empeiren "to make worse")

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COMMENTS:

gympressive...most gympressive...but you are not a gymjedi yet - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-06: 12:24:00

It's gympossible not to love it! There are so many great words today, too bad we can only pick 2! Makes one feel gympotent! - Nosila, 2008-05-06: 20:02:00

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Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation: an-yoor-iss-ize

Sentence: I thought I could manage one more rep but I ended up anuericising myself in quite an inconvenient place.

Etymology: Derived and extended from the Latin 'anueri' which was used to described self-abuse in all its unpleasant forms.

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COMMENTS:

Nice word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:41:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: natch hurt o path ee

Sentence: Arnold's naturopathy exercises turned into nathurtopathy exercises when he strained himself on his dumbells...apparently they were aptly named.

Etymology: Naturopathy (a method of treating disease using food and exercise and heat to assist the natural healing process) & Hurt (sore, in pain)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: fit - nus - slump

Sentence: Edgar had every intention of quickly regaining muscle tone and getting back on the conditioning routine but found he'd experienced a major fitnesslump and decided to forget the whole thing and return to his couch.

Etymology: Blend of fitness and slump

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COMMENTS:

That sounds like a nasty sort of lump. Should get it seen to. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 03:37:00

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: press-frak-chur

Sentence: Dan sustained a pressfracture when he tried to lift more weights than he should for a guy his age and shape. Adding insult to injury, he would have to endure the ribbing of the guys at the office and the constant "I told you so..." from his wife.

Etymology: press: a weight in weightlifting, to apply force or pressure + fracture: bone break or rupture in the cartilage -- stress fracture: fracture caused by undue stress or pressure on a bone

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Created by: Ismelstar

Pronunciation: [pind] or [pwind]

Sentence: Determined to defeat his winter love handles, Mark finally returned to the gym only to be pwgymned by the chest press machine for five minutes, like a gnat under a toothpick, while he waited for a trainer to rescue him.

Etymology: A combination of 'gym', a building or room designed and equipped for indoor exercise, and 'pwned', a corruption of the word 'owned' denoting domination by an opponent or situation, especially by some god-like or computer-like force. The combination sounds like 'pinned', meaning to hold something fast in a spot or position.

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