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'Computer programmers do not make mistakes.'

DEFINITION: n. A computer programmer who corrects software problems by bugging the users, rather than debugging the software. v. To pinpoint the blame for any defects in a product, especially a software product which you have created, on "illogical" end-users.

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Verboticisms

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Softwarespecialass

Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: soft ware spesh ial ass

Sentence: Hank's new income tax software’s many glitches prompted him to call technical support. However, the softwarespecialass maintained his program was flawless. He suggested Hank give the software another try while completing another random task, such as juggling oranges or counting sheep.

Etymology: From software specialist and ass.

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Condoscending

Created by: tmcg5625

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Displaim

Created by: stache

Pronunciation: dĭ-splām'

Sentence: "Clearly user error." Gaylord concluded. "You simply can't correctly interface with the connection-oriented data access arrangement..." "Don't displaim me," Marta interrupted, "I only hit 'start' and the thing locked up."

Etymology: displacement, psychological defense mechanism that transfers affect or reaction from the original object to some more acceptable one; display, to output (data) on a CRT or other screen, or, in non-computer usage, to reveal or betray; aim, to intend or direct for a particular effect or purpose.

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Macintoldyouso

youmustvotenato

Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: mack-in-told-you-so

Sentence: "The debug error of your .doc file has corrupted .dll operating systembytes," said Herbert, the IT guy. "Sooooorry Mr. Macintoldyouso," I muttered under my breath.

Etymology: Macintosh+Told you so

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Technillogicrat

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: tech - neh - LODJ - uh - crat

Sentence: Having an overblown ego and chutzpah to match, Cranston was a technillogicrat in the extreme who would never admit ignorance but would always blame everyone and everything else for things he could not remedy.

Etymology: Blend of 'technical' and 'illogical' with suffix '-crat'...member of a dominant class

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Softwarrior

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /sawft-WOR-ee-er/

Sentence: Bert, the department's IT Specialist, was a fanatical softwarrior, who would attack any of the mere users who dared to question the quality of their software. He fancied himself a sort of cyber-paladin, defender of the virtuous programmers who constructed such intricate code. Of course, Bert was sure that he could have joined their ranks, and that the brotherhood of programmers would welcome him with open arms, but he believed that his calling was here, at the front lines, keeping the unappreciative and discontented mobs of peasants... er, users, at bay.

Etymology: Software - the programs used to direct the operation of a computer (back-formation from the word 'hardware' as applied to computer equipment) + Warrior - one who is engaged aggressively or energetically in an activity, cause, or conflict (from Old North French, werreieur "one who wages war")

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Nincomputable

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: nin/com/pute/abul

Sentence: Our IT department always makes me feel like a nincomputable.

Etymology: nincompoop + computable

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Dissinformation

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: disinfərmāshən

Sentence: Lawrence is quite sure of his programming skills. When something doesn’t work the way he expects, he is preemptively sure that it is caused by user error. He has been known to spread dissinformation, belittling anyone who would dare question his skills.

Etymology: diss (act or speak in a disrespectful way toward)+ misinformation (false or inaccurate information, esp. that which is deliberately intended to deceive)

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Proctechnalgia

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: PROK-tek-nel-juh

Sentence: Bob, aka Cranston, was a technillogicrat whose proctechnalgia was the bane of all IT end-users.

Etymology: Blend of TECHNOLOGY, PROgram & PROCTALGIA:a pain in the ass.

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COMMENTS:

Blend of TECHNOLOGY & PROCTALGIA:a pain in the ass. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-14: 17:41:00

Oops! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-14: 17:42:00

funny - you must have put this in very late - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-14: 21:04:00

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Technoway

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: tek-no-way

Sentence: The office staff all called Hubert the tech 'technoway' for the way he tried to dismiss just about every service call by saying 'no way is this a computer error, it's operator error'.

Etymology: blend of technician and the phrase 'no way'

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COMMENTS:

artr Nice combo! - artr, 2009-06-26: 10:58:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-05-14: 00:03:02
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-06-26: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James

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