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'I thought you'd want a head on a platter'

DEFINITION: n. A punishment which does not fit crime. v. To assign a punishment which is bizarrely inappropriate, and seems totally unrelated to the crime which has been committed.

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Verboticisms

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Inmaterial

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: in - mate - tear - e - all

Sentence: After Barney jaywalked near the general store, Andy meted out a sentence that was inmaterial to the crime. He threw Barney in the slammer for three days....Barney got to see what it was like being an inmate, except that Aunt Bea brought him supper every evening.

Etymology: Inmate + Imaterial >> Inmate (convict: a person serving a sentence in a jail or prison) Imaterial (extraneous: not pertinent to the matter under consideration)

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COMMENTS:

love the Mayberry reference - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-06: 09:39:00

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Funishment

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: fənishmənt

Sentence: When the starlet got caught for the fifth time her funishment was very severe. She was sentenced to 30 days in frizzon — that’s right, she was locked up in a place that didn’t have proper hair products. She could do nothing but throw on a scarf, dark sunglasses and steer clear of places where paparazzi might catch a glimpse.

Etymology: fun (enjoyment, amusement, or lighthearted pleasure) + punishment (the infliction or imposition of a penalty as retribution for an offense)

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COMMENTS:

was just about to write that down :) - galwaywegian, 2010-09-17: 08:16:00

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Convictimization

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kon vik tim ize ashun

Sentence: It was pre-ordained. His name was Rob and by gosh, that is what he did for a living. He also wrote very bad checks. When he was caught and sentenced to 25 years in the pokey, he thought he had fallen prey to convictimization. He was incarcerated at Sing Sing, where contrary to the name, they did not sing, often or well. Warden Gordon Borden thought it would be ironic if Rob wrote the new Prison Newsletter, since he was so good at writing (bad checks). Rob called this literary marvel, "Sentences" and worked hard at it to make it informative and entertaining. He carried regular features, such as a column on advice to the lovelorn..."In-Mates" with such pertinent features as "Are you suffering from Penal Dysfunction?";The Daily Horrorscope ("Your life has settled into predictable routine but just wait, the new screw in Cell Block 4 has his eye on you. Prepare for excitement."); a singles column "Cell-ABC" and recipes from the prison kitchen, "The Garden of Pleadin'" ...for Chili CON carney...take 500 pounds of ground meat, throw in 18 cups of saltpeter,...etc. He also added news items that affected his readership: "Care and feeding of your pet Cockroach"; and he used the digital camera to get candid snaps of daily life column, "I've been framed". Rob became a publishing ty-con and made the most of his pun-nishment!

Etymology: Convict (a person serving a sentence in a jail or prison; a person who has been convicted of a criminal offence; find or declare guilty) & Victimization (adversity resulting from being made a victim; an act that exploits or victimizes someone (treats them unfairly))

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COMMENTS:

written with conviction!! - galwaywegian, 2009-03-06: 05:56:00

Top Notch Job creating this 'con' job and 'con' verbotomy! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:15:00

So funny!!! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-08: 10:30:00

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Higohoamercement

RightOnTheWin

Created by: RightOnTheWin

Pronunciation: (Hig-o-ho\mər-smənt);Hig-hi-ho\a-merce-ment

Sentence: John was sentenced to pay a fine of fifteen thousand dollars for speeding; however the judge ruled this higōhōamercement as unconstitutional.

Etymology: Orgin:Higōhō(Japanese romaji), adjectival noun. Illegal; Unlawful. Amercement, noun. To punish by a fine whose amount is fixed by the court.

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Perverdict

Created by: rombus

Pronunciation: pur - vur - dikt

Sentence: Judge Malloy handed down a perverdict in the swindling case against Margorie Vandenspit. After stealing millions of dollars from unsuspecting victims of phishing schemes; stealing their identities and sending them fishheads in the mail, Marjorie got off with community service. If this wasn't a case of perverdict justice, then I have lost more than my sense of humor.

Etymology: preverted and verdict -- perverted: distorted or deviating from what is usually considered to be normal or correct -- verdict: A decision on an issue of fact in a civil or criminal case or an inquest

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Nonsentence

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: nohn sen tensss

Sentence: the judge told the pervert that he would have to wash miss jones' underwear for a year. complete and utter nonsentence

Etymology: sentence, nonsense

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Sissyfine

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: siss eeeeeeeee feye nnnnh

Sentence: He walked into judge Draco's courtroom with the sinking feeling that a sissyfine decision was on its way.

Etymology: fine, Sisyphean challenge" "wikipedia" As a punishment from the gods for his trickery, Sisyphus was compelled to roll a huge rock up a steep hill, but before he could reach the top of the hill, the rock would always roll back down again, forcing him to begin again.[2] The maddening nature of the punishment was reserved for Sisyphus due to his hubristic belief that his cleverness surpassed that of Zeus.

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COMMENTS:

oooh!! very cerebral today - Jabberwocky, 2009-03-06: 09:38:00

Wow! Sissyfine was just fine as a simple combine of sissy and fine and a great create. Then I read the etymology, enjoyed the Greek myth new to me. Not quite an eponym for you spelled it differently from the Greek, but that just made it better. Double meanings are not easily created. Absolutely Brilliant! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:30:00

Very clever! - kateinkorea, 2009-03-08: 10:20:00

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Punytivedamages

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: pewnee/tiv/dam/aj/es

Sentence: Punytivedamages amounting to a cutback of .025% of the Bank President's bonus for the year seemed unfair to the dispossessed living under the bridge who had been sold useless investments by his bank.

Etymology: puny (feeble, undersized) + punitve damages

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COMMENTS:

It makes you lose interest in banks! - Nosila, 2009-03-06: 18:44:00

Master of the one letter change to form a perfect verbotomy! Brilliant! - silveryaspen, 2009-03-06: 19:11:00

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Ojsimpsoned

Created by: whazat29

Pronunciation: o.j. simpsoned

Sentence: o my gosh, I was so o.j. simpsoned for dating becky's mom.

Etymology: o.j. simpson

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Penrong

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pen rong

Sentence: When the judge gave the sentence of 30 days in a luxury penthouse jail to the CEO of the biggest con job of the century, the defence lawyer filed an appeal called a penrong. Afterall, it was a victimless crime, no blood was spilled and such a sentence was cruel and unusual punishment for a mere bookkeeping error. Forcibly placing his client in such a primitive environment constituted a penal implant, which undermined his client's basic human rights and dignity.

Etymology: Pen (short for penitentiary or jail) & Enron (Billion dollar fraud scandal)& Wrong (incorrect)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-03-06: 00:01:01
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-09-17: 00:22:00
Today's definition was suggested by metrohumanx. Thank you metrohumanx. ~ James