Verboticisms

Created by: ohwtepph

Pronunciation: not-thees [thin]

Sentence: Mr. Crooks always had a problem with his ears. One day, he went to the doctor and asked, "Doctor, my ears are semi-deaf. Hell, I can't even hear my own farts." The doctor gave him a wonder medicine that was described to miraculously heal the ears. One day, the meds kicked in and he was rushed to the emergency room with the wife screaming, "Notthis! Notthis!" The emergeny room was in a mess when the medicine that the doctor gave Mr. Crooks intensified his flatus rather than aid his hearing.

Etymology: not this

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Created by: ajcor

Pronunciation: as it sounds

Sentence: Cyril suffered delightedly from PhonyPubePoints after taking his herbal remedy for hair loss and ingrowing toe nails.

Etymology: Phony - as in fake Pube as in pubescent = youth Points as in an unexpected hardening of personal protubing muscle = tent pegs

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Created by: guesser

Pronunciation: Amor + oops

Sentence: Jenny, bothered by her husbands new "condition", called his Doctor to ask, "How many more mornings am I going to have to put up with his desire for Fruit Loops and Amoroops for Breakfast"?

Etymology: Amorous ( passionate ) + oops ( mistake )

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Created by: Mrgoodtimes

Pronunciation: Pu - bes - cebo

Sentence: Martha would not have told her husband that she added a multivitamin to his breakfast if she could have foreseen the pubescebo effect it would have on him, resulting in a trip to the doctor after his back went out.

Etymology: Pubescent - Placebo

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: rijoōvəninē

Sentence: Walter was having issues with his circulation. A side effect of his new prescription is increased blood flow to certain underused parts of his anatomy. His wife amused and bemused by his rejuveninny behavior.

Etymology: rejuvenate (make someone or something look or feel younger) + ninny (a foolish person)

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Created by: Pythias

Pronunciation: vi-a-tro-gen-e-sis

Sentence: Your husband's behaviour may result from a rare side effect sometimes referred to as clinical viatrogenesis. This is not necessarily a bad thing.

Etymology: Viagra + iatrogenesis ( means "brought forth by a healer" )

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Created by: jermainechambers44

Pronunciation: Tie-ger-wood-ical

Sentence: Agnas wanted to light a little fire in the bedroom,not burn down the town.She knew then that it could be nothing other than a case of Tigerwoodical,that been plagueing the old-folks home since they got the golf channel.

Etymology:

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Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: re/act/ten

Sentence: Istead of giving him Reactin the pharmacist gave him Reacten. His wife couldn't figure out why he was dressing like Denis the Menace

Etymology: reactin + ten

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: medidātng

Sentence: Since Edith passed Richard has had little interest in re-kindling his love life but his doctor has introduced him to a new sport; medidating. A couple of little pills give him the redumb to seek out the company of women with confidunce.

Etymology: medicate (administer medicine or a drug to someone) + dating (a social or romantic appointment or engagement)

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COMMENTS:

clever... - mweinmann, 2010-01-12: 07:41:00

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Created by: sanssouci

Pronunciation: Ree Flick Sir Lies

Sentence: I hesitated outside the brightly decorated shop and peered through the window. The shop was called Medimagic, it had only been trading for a month but already the business had got quiet a good reputation here in our little village of Greenwood, especially amongst the older community. Just the other day, while I was sitting on my wooden bench, relaxing in the afternoon sun outside my old little cottage. I was flabergasted to observe an energetic figure running towards me, my old mate Harold, 85 years old and there he was full of life like a sixteen year old lad! "They sell this herbal remedy George! They call it Relixerlize, I don't know what they put in it. It must be magic, look at me! I'm on fire" he loudly proclaimed, dancing around on my daffadils. Now here I was, curiosity got the better of me and I wanted a bit of what Harold had got. I stepped inside, I was getting myself some Relixerlize.

Etymology: reflex + elixer + revitalize = relixerlize reflex 1. noting or pertaining to an involuntary response to a stimulus 2. occurring in reaction; responsive. elixir 2.A substance believed to maintain life indefinitely. Also called elixir of life. 3. A substance or medicine believed to have the power to cure all ills. revitalize 1. to give new life to. 2. to give new vitality or vigor to.

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