Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. To remain calm, steadfast and ploddingly systematic in the midst of a huge freaking disaster. n. A person who systematizes everything from their morning routines to personal relationships.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Calmandant
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: colm man dant
Sentence: His real name was Edward Edwards, but we called him Steady Eddie. His middle name was Danger, you just knew it. He was the Safety Officer at work. You know, the guy they have to have on staff by law, who has weekly boring meetings, who arranges first-aid classes ad nauseum, who sends out zillions of safety tips and preventative brochures. You know, the guy who loves to organize fire drills, creates emergency preparedness policies, who lives for Fire Prevention Week or news of the Pandemic,who arranges yearly flu shots, who handles bomb scares, suicide preventions, does random drug testing and tries to beat his last timed evacuation record. He can't wait to have to call the CDC in Atlanta, the FAA, ER, SWAT,Interpol, WCB,EPA, FireRescue, Coast Guard, National Guard and any other agencies on his speed-dial. He lives to test our flashlight batteries, extinguishers, carbon monoxide detectors and the oxygen masks that he has installed over our desks, like the airlines. Don't get me wrong, we need guys like Steady Eddie, but did he have to enjoy a career based on potential tragedy so much? Although excited by the prospect of a looming calamity, he always remained cool, calm and efficient. Steady Eddie was the Master of Disaster; he was the AntiCrisis; the Apocalypse Mao; The Tragically Equipped; Genghis Yes-You-Can; Attila The Nine-One-One; Napoleon Bones-a-part; The Wizard of Gauze...Yes, he was our own Calmandant. They said he even stayed calm when the aliens abducted him one morning and took him with them to probe at will, never to get to wear his reflective safety vest and clipboard again. There's just no known drill to prevent that kind of incident!
Etymology: calm (steadiness of mind under stress;marked by freedom from agitation or excitement) & commandant (someone in an official position of authority who can command or control others)
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COMMENTS:
"Apocalypse Mao" was just too funny! Excellent. - Tigger, 2008-07-10: 02:03:00
CALMANDANT is cool- Steady Eddy is just the kind of take-charge guy we need ......not - metrohumanx, 2008-07-10: 07:50:00
very apt - Jabberwocky, 2008-07-10: 09:37:00
Steady Eddie is indeed needed in these types of situations, - at least, he'd keep everyone laughing. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-07-11: 18:23:00
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Lifebot
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: lyf - bot
Sentence: Stanley behaved much like a lifebot. No matter what situation he found himself in, he acted predictably detached, calm and methodical; with no apparent emotion.
Etymology: life, robot
Wolfowitz
Created by: uriash
Pronunciation: Wol-Fo-Witz
Sentence: Don't start Wolfowitzing now! You must run for your life!
Etymology: after Paul Wolfowitz
Modusopergandhi
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: mode us op er gan dee
Sentence: No matter what crisis happened at work or at home, Randy was a real modusopergandhi. He planned every detail, faithfully crossed achieved tasks off his to-do list and never allowed another's failure to plan to constitute an emergency on his part. He was the safety officer and very concientious about prevention and procedure. It then came as a great surprise to everyone, including him, when his girlfriend became unexpectedly pregnant. But then these things can happen when you are Randy...
Etymology: Modus Operandi (Latin for an unvarying or habitual method of procedure) & Gandhi (political and spiritual leader during India's struggle with Great Britain for home rule; an advocate of passive resistance (1869-1948. He always appeared calm and collected through physical and emotional strife)
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COMMENTS:
:-) - CharlieB, 2011-04-15: 06:39:00
cracked me up!!! - libertybelle, 2011-04-15: 07:35:00
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Freason
Created by: mishmish
Pronunciation:
Sentence: I get so excited when I'm in front of all these people, but she just freasons.
Etymology: Freeze + reason
Placidifize
Created by: daisy
Pronunciation: pla-si-di-fize
Sentence: Don't placidifize me, with those pictures on the internet, I will never be president!
Etymology:
Samuelel
Created by: playdohheart
Pronunciation: sam-u-uhl-El
Sentence: A constant state of samuelel is important when landing a plane infested with snakes or peacefully resolving the holdup of a diner.
Etymology: Every movie of Samuel L Jackson
Chaotizen
Created by: brucee10
Pronunciation: Kay - ah - Ti - zen
Sentence: His chaotizen attitude was infuriating. How he could read a book during an multi-server crash, I'll never know.
Etymology: Chaotic + zen or chaos+ citizen(someone who lives in constant chaos and is not alarmed by it)
Systemanic
Created by: jschrady
Pronunciation: (sis-ta-man-ick)
Sentence: The way he organized everything on his desk in perfect right angles labeled him as a systemanic among the OCD world.
Etymology: system- A way of defining/organizing things into appropriate sections based on preference & manic- Over the top ridiculous about something
Indexhaustive
Created by: CharlieB
Pronunciation: in-decks-orst-ive
Sentence: In the face of disaster, Sarah got tunnel vision. As her exasperated boyfriend pakced his suitcase to leave for a new life, she followed him round and indexhaustively rearranged the books he wasn't taking into alphabetical order.
Etymology: index (to put into order) + exhaustive (tiring out, draining) + ex (former partner or spouse)
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COMMENTS:
cute - Nosila, 2011-04-15: 11:30:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was inspired by Cory Doctorow's short story "When Sysadmins Ruled the Earth" which is published in Overclocked, and was suggested by autophile. Thank you Cory and autophile! ~ James
I'm still grinning at this one. Well done!
Today's definition was suggested by doctorow. Thank you doctorow. ~ James