Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: byer lyer

Sentence: Randy could always tell when the full moon approached...all the buyerliars in town came into his store to vent their spleens.

Etymology: Buyer & Liar

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: whyne styne

Sentence: Mrs. Gorgonzola was a real Whinestein. You know the type of customer we mean...one who complained about everything, was a retail snob and showed off her ignorance at the same time. Every week she entered the Gourmet Cheese Shoppe in the Mall called Cheese Louise. And every week she berated the owner, Louise, with her usual rants: "These Emmenthalers were no Gouda...I could barely Edam!"; "It's a Feta Accompli that this Roquefort will be Stilton my Children's Gruyereth!"; "Why is this Fontina the Mozza expensive cheese in the Store?"; "I simply Camembert to try the Chevre...it makes me Cheddar to think what's in it!" "Must they alwheys make Swiss Cheese with holes in it...what poor workmanship!";"My daughter, Velveeta, Brie-ds American Cheese Dogs and is Whey beyond her years!" and "Why does it always smell like milk gone bad in this Shoppe...couldn't you come up with a grater scent?" Louise would smile and nod and take her money, thinking to herself, I hate her, but I'm Fondue, my little greenbacks. Yes, Louise thought it appropriate to have a little Whine with her Cheese!

Etymology: Whine (to moan and complain in a plaintive manner) & Stein (a mug) & Einstein (a genius,someone who has exceptional intellectual ability and originality)

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COMMENTS:

You're examples are the best...a little cheesy, perhaps, but I've found none butter! - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00

I meant your, not you're. - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00

What a grate story. Lets Rock n Rocqefort!! - rombus, 2008-11-13: 12:53:00

Very clever - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:49:00

Nothing like a fromage a trois! Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-11-14: 23:54:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: creep/zoom/er

Sentence: The worst job at Sears is the product return desk which attracts one creepsumer after another.

Etymology: creep + consumer

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: whyn ex pert

Sentence: John came into the venders every week, bought 2 bottles of the chaepest plonk he could find and then complained about them next week. He was quite the whinexpert and grew so annoying, the finally barred him from the shop.

Etymology: Whine (complain in annoying manner) & Wordplay on Wine Expert (oenophile;connoisseur)

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Created by: bananabender

Pronunciation: bul / li / gote

Sentence: He ranted and raved about the "faulty" nose-hair clippers, complaining that no matter how many times he used them his hair kept growing back. He's such a bullygoat!

Etymology: Bull**** - nonsense, humbug / bully - a tyrannical blustering ruffian / goat - "get on one's goat" (coll) to annoy, also "act the goat" (coll) to behave foolishly

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COMMENTS:

"Damn Ram" said Nannygoat, "but I love that old Bullygoat! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:03:00

I like it! Seems to me that he very caprickious! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:27:00

Hey, that's it. That's what the guy in the picture kinda' looks like — a bleating goat! - Tigger, 2008-01-16: 21:02:00

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Created by: logarithm

Pronunciation: kursstəmər

Sentence:

Etymology: From 'customer' - a person or company that buys goods or services; and 'curse' or 'cuss' - to utter obscenities or profanities.

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COMMENTS:

Or, better still, 'cusstomer', where the 'cuss' is pronounced with extra hissing sound. - logarithm, 2008-11-17: 05:53:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: TYE-ran-UH-suhr-VIS-veks

Sentence: Bob, at first, an irebuyer, quickly became an tyranuservicevex, scowling at the brow, when his local cheesemaker decided to decrease the size of the holes in the emmentaler.

Etymology: Blend of TYRANUS; SERVICE & VEX. Loosely based on Tyranusaurus Rex. This creature is probably the most famous and most fearsome predator of all times (Cretaceous, 85-65 million years ago), its name meaning 'terrible king lizard'. VEX: To make angry or annoyed by little provocations; to irritate; to plague; to torment; to harass; to afflict; to trouble;

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COMMENTS:

wonderfully wacky - love it - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-13: 14:47:00

Very clever! - Mustang, 2008-11-13: 22:36:00

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Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: kurs tom mer

Sentence: He returned the swearword dictionary with plenty of loud cursetommer. "What a cursetommer!" said the courtesy counter lady, "Why he probably wrote that book!"

Etymology: Interplay of curse and customer. Curse having the double meaning of (1)swearing (using bad negative words) or (2) casting a spell, usually an evil one. Customer meaning one who purchases goods or services.

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Created by: Biscotti

Pronunciation: flus toh mer

Sentence: Working in retail, I've had many a flustomer in my face!

Etymology: Fluster (angry, upset) + Customer (one who buys things from someone else)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kaws-tuh-mer

Sentence: Jerry is perfect for the complaint department. He can tolerate the worst caustomer because he really believes that his opinion is the only one that counts.

Etymology: caustic (severely critical or sarcastic) + customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another; buyer)

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