Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Plaguetron
Created by: thegoatisbad
Pronunciation: puh-lay-ge-tron
Sentence: While Zinnia was on vacation, urgent calls were redirected to Kimberly's desk, and Kimberly hated this. Among Zinnia's tasks, she was responsible for dealing with unsatisfied customers, when these unpleased patrons were forwarded to Kimberly, all hell broke loose. "I can only call them plaguetrons" She said, "I had no idea people could be so upset about a sweater. How is it our fault that her daughter can't ever ride a horse?"
Etymology: Plague (scary things that happened in the bible and the 13th century) + Patron (a customer)
Whinestein
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne styne
Sentence: Mrs. Gorgonzola was a real Whinestein. You know the type of customer we mean...one who complained about everything, was a retail snob and showed off her ignorance at the same time. Every week she entered the Gourmet Cheese Shoppe in the Mall called Cheese Louise. And every week she berated the owner, Louise, with her usual rants: "These Emmenthalers were no Gouda...I could barely Edam!"; "It's a Feta Accompli that this Roquefort will be Stilton my Children's Gruyereth!"; "Why is this Fontina the Mozza expensive cheese in the Store?"; "I simply Camembert to try the Chevre...it makes me Cheddar to think what's in it!" "Must they alwheys make Swiss Cheese with holes in it...what poor workmanship!";"My daughter, Velveeta, Brie-ds American Cheese Dogs and is Whey beyond her years!" and "Why does it always smell like milk gone bad in this Shoppe...couldn't you come up with a grater scent?" Louise would smile and nod and take her money, thinking to herself, I hate her, but I'm Fondue, my little greenbacks. Yes, Louise thought it appropriate to have a little Whine with her Cheese!
Etymology: Whine (to moan and complain in a plaintive manner) & Stein (a mug) & Einstein (a genius,someone who has exceptional intellectual ability and originality)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
You're examples are the best...a little cheesy, perhaps, but I've found none butter! - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
I meant your, not you're. - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
What a grate story. Lets Rock n Rocqefort!! - rombus, 2008-11-13: 12:53:00
Very clever - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:49:00
Nothing like a fromage a trois! Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-11-14: 23:54:00
----------------------------
Fauxnystud
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: fo - nee - stud
Sentence: Once again Edmund displayed his fauxnystud persona by making a huge fuss over a very small problem wih a purchase.
Etymology: Fauxny(phony) + stud (macho guy)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Roared with laughter ... good one! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 07:59:00
----------------------------
Cursetomer
Created by: logarithm
Pronunciation: kursstəmər
Sentence:
Etymology: From 'customer' - a person or company that buys goods or services; and 'curse' or 'cuss' - to utter obscenities or profanities.
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Or, better still, 'cusstomer', where the 'cuss' is pronounced with extra hissing sound. - logarithm, 2008-11-17: 05:53:00
----------------------------
Bullygoat
Created by: bananabender
Pronunciation: bul / li / gote
Sentence: He ranted and raved about the "faulty" nose-hair clippers, complaining that no matter how many times he used them his hair kept growing back. He's such a bullygoat!
Etymology: Bull**** - nonsense, humbug / bully - a tyrannical blustering ruffian / goat - "get on one's goat" (coll) to annoy, also "act the goat" (coll) to behave foolishly
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
"Damn Ram" said Nannygoat, "but I love that old Bullygoat! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:03:00
I like it! Seems to me that he very caprickious! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:27:00
Hey, that's it. That's what the guy in the picture kinda' looks like — a bleating goat! - Tigger, 2008-01-16: 21:02:00
----------------------------
Tirate
Created by: yellowbird
Pronunciation: ty-rate
Sentence: Judy waited for the red-faced woman to wind up her tirate before holding up the little white score card on which she had written 8.5. For some reason, this seemed to make the customer even angrier.
Etymology: tirade + rate(as in product rating)
Irebuyer
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: ahy-ur-BAHY-uhr
Sentence: Bob quickly became an irebuyer, scowling at the brow, when his local cheesemaker decided to decrease the size of the holes in the emmentaler.
Etymology: Conflation of IRE:anger, wrath, rage, & BUYER:purchaser, vendee, client
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Rhyming creations always ring my bell. Nice one! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:06:00
His argument definately had some holes in it. No holes in your word though! - bananabender, 2008-01-17: 02:27:00
----------------------------
Whinexpert
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyn ex pert
Sentence: John came into the venders every week, bought 2 bottles of the chaepest plonk he could find and then complained about them next week. He was quite the whinexpert and grew so annoying, the finally barred him from the shop.
Etymology: Whine (complain in annoying manner) & Wordplay on Wine Expert (oenophile;connoisseur)
Creepsumer
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: creep/zoom/er
Sentence: The worst job at Sears is the product return desk which attracts one creepsumer after another.
Etymology: CREEPSUMER noun - from CREEP (an annoyingly unpleasant, or repulsive person) + CONSUMER (one that acquires goods, or services for direct use )
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:51:00
Excellent - Mustang, 2008-11-13: 22:36:00
----------------------------
Paintron
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: payn tron
Sentence: Most customers are nice. They are happy you help them, grateful when you go out of your way to serve them. They are true patrons, they pay your wages. Then there is the paintron, he makes you earn your wages and then some. Although he is only one in a hundred, he makes noise and aggravation enough for the other ninety-nine. You may not remember all the nice ones, but you can never forget the bad ones. Thank goodness they are in the minority!
Etymology: Pain (emotional distress; a fundamental feeling that people try to avoid;a bothersome annoying person)& Patron (client, customer)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James