Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
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Customonster
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kəstəmänstər
Sentence: Oh no, here he comes Jody said to herself. Her customonster liked to come in at least once a week to make himself feel powerful by chewing on her for a while. He would go out of his way to find an item with some sort of scratch or blemish. Then he would demand a discount. She finally turned the tables on him when she caught him scratching a piece of her merchandise. She scolded him like he was a naughty puppy. She never saw him again.
Etymology: customer (a person or organization that buys goods or services from a store or business) + monster (an imaginary creature that is typically large, ugly, and frightening)
Foolabluster
Created by: Redrover
Pronunciation: fool-uh-bluster
Sentence: Mark's earbuds are so small that his customers aren't even aware that he can't hear a single word of their foolablustering.
Etymology: fool= a silly or stupid person; a person who lacks judgment or sense bluster = noisy, empty threats or protests
Plaguetron
Created by: thegoatisbad
Pronunciation: puh-lay-ge-tron
Sentence: While Zinnia was on vacation, urgent calls were redirected to Kimberly's desk, and Kimberly hated this. Among Zinnia's tasks, she was responsible for dealing with unsatisfied customers, when these unpleased patrons were forwarded to Kimberly, all hell broke loose. "I can only call them plaguetrons" She said, "I had no idea people could be so upset about a sweater. How is it our fault that her daughter can't ever ride a horse?"
Etymology: Plague (scary things that happened in the bible and the 13th century) + Patron (a customer)
Crusstomer
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: cruss/tum/ur
Sentence: All clerks manning the crusstomer service counters should be equipped with IPODS playing soothing music with positive reinforcement lyrics.
Etymology: customer + crusty (irritable) + cuss (slang for curse)
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COMMENTS:
Shades of "Crusty the Clown." Nicely blended. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:53:00
Good word - TJayzz, 2008-11-14: 04:21:00
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Cathareturn
Created by: zavijava
Pronunciation:
Sentence: After the 100th complaint that someone's Mii didn't love them anymore, Best Buy set up a separate line for people wanting to cathareturn things, with a pyschology student running customer service.
Etymology: catharsis+return Noun: Cathareturner
Whinexpert
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyn ex pert
Sentence: John came into the venders every week, bought 2 bottles of the chaepest plonk he could find and then complained about them next week. He was quite the whinexpert and grew so annoying, the finally barred him from the shop.
Etymology: Whine (complain in annoying manner) & Wordplay on Wine Expert (oenophile;connoisseur)
Tantrumonsters
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: tantrəmänstərs
Sentence: Reggie knew his day was shot when he saw them coming through the door. The tantrumonsters had arrived. The bus from the assisted-living home must have jettisoned its cargo. These three seemed to have nothing better to do than complain over minutia. He calls them T-Vex, Rageasaur and Triscarytops. This time he was ready for them. He threw up a bogo (buy one, get one) banner to momentarily distract them and made a dash for the stock room. It didn't take long for them to get bored and move onto another store and another customer service rep to gnaw on.
Etymology: Tantrum (an uncontrolled outburst of anger and frustration, typically in young child) + Monster (an imaginary creature that is typically large, ugly, and frightening)
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COMMENTS:
Nice blend. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:50:00
Nice story....those dinosars put the "Sore" in Thesaurus! - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:46:00
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Transfereturnence
Created by: mrskellyscl
Pronunciation: trans-fer-re-turn-ence
Sentence: A good CSR knows when an irate customer is making a transfereturnence. When a man complains about a kitchen gadget it means that he had a fight with his wife. When an irate woman argues with him about a sweater it's often because her mother made a nasty comment about it. But when someone returns Postits because they're the wrong color it often reveals some serious potty training issues.
Etymology: transference:in psychoanalysis - the process whereby emotions such as rage or hatred are unconsciously shifted from one person or object to another + return: to bring back to the original place of purchase; coming back to a place or situation
Grobble
Created by: Maxine
Pronunciation: graw bul
Sentence: Every time he was displeased with a purchase, Mike would grobble about his difficult life.
Etymology: grob, n., a petty complaint issued by whiny lips and registered by those who don't know better.
Counterattacker
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Cown-ter-at-aker
Sentence: Jerry was used to dealing with awkward customers, but when it came to Mr Pennyworth, the serial counterattacker, he was at a complete loss. Jerry dreaded the moment when he walked through the doors of his hardware shop. He never actually bought anything but he would continually come to the counter with various items and proceed to tell anyone who would listen that the products were inferior. He then ranted on that things were made to a much higher standard in his day and were made to last. Jerry was just grateful that Mr Pennyworth was well known for his rants all over town, and his other customers never took him seriously.
Etymology: Counter(a long flat-topped fitment over which goods are sold to customers) + Attacker(someone who takes agressive action) = Counterattacker
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COMMENTS:
Talk about a need for Counterintelligence! Good Word - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:43:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James