Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
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Bullygoat
Created by: bananabender
Pronunciation: bul / li / gote
Sentence: He ranted and raved about the "faulty" nose-hair clippers, complaining that no matter how many times he used them his hair kept growing back. He's such a bullygoat!
Etymology: Bull**** - nonsense, humbug / bully - a tyrannical blustering ruffian / goat - "get on one's goat" (coll) to annoy, also "act the goat" (coll) to behave foolishly
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COMMENTS:
"Damn Ram" said Nannygoat, "but I love that old Bullygoat! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:03:00
I like it! Seems to me that he very caprickious! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:27:00
Hey, that's it. That's what the guy in the picture kinda' looks like — a bleating goat! - Tigger, 2008-01-16: 21:02:00
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Custobluster
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kəstəbləstər
Sentence: The store wasn’t even open yet but there he was, Mr. Bellow. At least that’s what Carlos and his coworkers call him. He is full of custobluster, all too ready to scream and yell about whatever minor issue he could find. He doesn’t really worry Carlos that much. He can easily be distracted by the introduction of the newest ”shiny thing”.
Etymology: customer (a person or organization that buys goods or services from a store or business) + bluster (talk in a loud, aggressive, or indignant way with little effect)
Conshrewmer
Created by: grohldberg12
Pronunciation: (Cun//shroo//mar)
Sentence:
Etymology: Consumer + Shrew
Consuminad
Created by: missyfrose
Pronunciation: con-soo-min-ad
Sentence: That consuminad has some serious self-esteem issues. Don't consuminate to me, I'm not your therapist!
Etymology: consumer, inadequate
Transfereturnence
Created by: mrskellyscl
Pronunciation: trans-fer-re-turn-ence
Sentence: A good CSR knows when an irate customer is making a transfereturnence. When a man complains about a kitchen gadget it means that he had a fight with his wife. When an irate woman argues with him about a sweater it's often because her mother made a nasty comment about it. But when someone returns Postits because they're the wrong color it often reveals some serious potty training issues.
Etymology: transference:in psychoanalysis - the process whereby emotions such as rage or hatred are unconsciously shifted from one person or object to another + return: to bring back to the original place of purchase; coming back to a place or situation
Caustomer
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kaws-tuh-mer
Sentence: Jerry is perfect for the complaint department. He can tolerate the worst caustomer because he really believes that his opinion is the only one that counts.
Etymology: caustic (severely critical or sarcastic) + customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another; buyer)
Whinestein
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne styne
Sentence: Mrs. Gorgonzola was a real Whinestein. You know the type of customer we mean...one who complained about everything, was a retail snob and showed off her ignorance at the same time. Every week she entered the Gourmet Cheese Shoppe in the Mall called Cheese Louise. And every week she berated the owner, Louise, with her usual rants: "These Emmenthalers were no Gouda...I could barely Edam!"; "It's a Feta Accompli that this Roquefort will be Stilton my Children's Gruyereth!"; "Why is this Fontina the Mozza expensive cheese in the Store?"; "I simply Camembert to try the Chevre...it makes me Cheddar to think what's in it!" "Must they alwheys make Swiss Cheese with holes in it...what poor workmanship!";"My daughter, Velveeta, Brie-ds American Cheese Dogs and is Whey beyond her years!" and "Why does it always smell like milk gone bad in this Shoppe...couldn't you come up with a grater scent?" Louise would smile and nod and take her money, thinking to herself, I hate her, but I'm Fondue, my little greenbacks. Yes, Louise thought it appropriate to have a little Whine with her Cheese!
Etymology: Whine (to moan and complain in a plaintive manner) & Stein (a mug) & Einstein (a genius,someone who has exceptional intellectual ability and originality)
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COMMENTS:
You're examples are the best...a little cheesy, perhaps, but I've found none butter! - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
I meant your, not you're. - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
What a grate story. Lets Rock n Rocqefort!! - rombus, 2008-11-13: 12:53:00
Very clever - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:49:00
Nothing like a fromage a trois! Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-11-14: 23:54:00
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Fauxnystud
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: fo - nee - stud
Sentence: Once again Edmund displayed his fauxnystud persona by making a huge fuss over a very small problem wih a purchase.
Etymology: Fauxny(phony) + stud (macho guy)
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COMMENTS:
Roared with laughter ... good one! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 07:59:00
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Whinebuyer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne by er
Sentence: Corky McPlonk was a regular complainer to the winery. He usually had a burgundy beef, a grape gripe, a grappa grumble, a cabernet carp, a retsina regret or a white whine whimper. He was a whinebuyer they just hated to hear from...they didn't know if he drank too much or too little of their products. From Rhone moans, to Liebfraumilch laments, to Rosé rants to Muscatel mutters, he was never happy. One day he phoned and had a cork kvetch. "Your merlot is hard to open...how can I enjoy it if I can't decant it?" he bellowed. The service associate told him that the bottle would open easier if he simply unscrewed the metal cap. Shiraz shooting, it worked!
Etymology: Whine (complain;a complaint uttered in a plaintive whining way) & Buyer (Customer, patron;purchaser)
Creepsumer
Created by: Stevenson0
Pronunciation: creep/zoom/er
Sentence: The worst job at Sears is the product return desk which attracts one creepsumer after another.
Etymology: creep + consumer
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James