Verboticisms

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kaws-tuh-mer

Sentence: Jerry is perfect for the complaint department. He can tolerate the worst caustomer because he really believes that his opinion is the only one that counts.

Etymology: caustic (severely critical or sarcastic) + customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another; buyer)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: payn tron

Sentence: Most customers are nice. They are happy you help them, grateful when you go out of your way to serve them. They are true patrons, they pay your wages. Then there is the paintron, he makes you earn your wages and then some. Although he is only one in a hundred, he makes noise and aggravation enough for the other ninety-nine. You may not remember all the nice ones, but you can never forget the bad ones. Thank goodness they are in the minority!

Etymology: Pain (emotional distress; a fundamental feeling that people try to avoid;a bothersome annoying person)& Patron (client, customer)

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Created by: Maxine

Pronunciation: graw bul

Sentence: Every time he was displeased with a purchase, Mike would grobble about his difficult life.

Etymology: grob, n., a petty complaint issued by whiny lips and registered by those who don't know better.

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Cown-ter-at-aker

Sentence: Jerry was used to dealing with awkward customers, but when it came to Mr Pennyworth, the serial counterattacker, he was at a complete loss. Jerry dreaded the moment when he walked through the doors of his hardware shop. He never actually bought anything but he would continually come to the counter with various items and proceed to tell anyone who would listen that the products were inferior. He then ranted on that things were made to a much higher standard in his day and were made to last. Jerry was just grateful that Mr Pennyworth was well known for his rants all over town, and his other customers never took him seriously.

Etymology: Counter(a long flat-topped fitment over which goods are sold to customers) + Attacker(someone who takes agressive action) = Counterattacker

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COMMENTS:

Talk about a need for Counterintelligence! Good Word - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:43:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: creep/zoom/er

Sentence: The worst job at Sears is the product return desk which attracts one creepsumer after another.

Etymology: creep + consumer

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: whyn ex pert

Sentence: John came into the venders every week, bought 2 bottles of the chaepest plonk he could find and then complained about them next week. He was quite the whinexpert and grew so annoying, the finally barred him from the shop.

Etymology: Whine (complain in annoying manner) & Wordplay on Wine Expert (oenophile;connoisseur)

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Created by: rombus

Pronunciation: shop - a - brawl - ick

Sentence: John had a really nasty problem that he couldn't seem to control. He often got into intense arguments with shop clerks and check-out personnel in stores over everything from the prices of goods to their functionality. His shopabrawlic behavior was out of control and he couldn't seem to help himself. He felt so much better after an argument that he often bought things just for the thrill of the argument.

Etymology: The word shop (which means to purchase or look for) is combined with brawl (to quarrel angrily or disruptively). This is also kind of smashed in with alcoholic to denote an addiction to the behavior.

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COMMENTS:

very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-13: 14:47:00

Spot on. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:48:00

And the Shopabrawlics all come out at the full moon...oh, that's today! Good Word, timely. - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:48:00

Great! - TJayzz, 2008-11-14: 04:23:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: whyne styne

Sentence: Mrs. Gorgonzola was a real Whinestein. You know the type of customer we mean...one who complained about everything, was a retail snob and showed off her ignorance at the same time. Every week she entered the Gourmet Cheese Shoppe in the Mall called Cheese Louise. And every week she berated the owner, Louise, with her usual rants: "These Emmenthalers were no Gouda...I could barely Edam!"; "It's a Feta Accompli that this Roquefort will be Stilton my Children's Gruyereth!"; "Why is this Fontina the Mozza expensive cheese in the Store?"; "I simply Camembert to try the Chevre...it makes me Cheddar to think what's in it!" "Must they alwheys make Swiss Cheese with holes in it...what poor workmanship!";"My daughter, Velveeta, Brie-ds American Cheese Dogs and is Whey beyond her years!" and "Why does it always smell like milk gone bad in this Shoppe...couldn't you come up with a grater scent?" Louise would smile and nod and take her money, thinking to herself, I hate her, but I'm Fondue, my little greenbacks. Yes, Louise thought it appropriate to have a little Whine with her Cheese!

Etymology: Whine (to moan and complain in a plaintive manner) & Stein (a mug) & Einstein (a genius,someone who has exceptional intellectual ability and originality)

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COMMENTS:

You're examples are the best...a little cheesy, perhaps, but I've found none butter! - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00

I meant your, not you're. - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00

What a grate story. Lets Rock n Rocqefort!! - rombus, 2008-11-13: 12:53:00

Very clever - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:49:00

Nothing like a fromage a trois! Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-11-14: 23:54:00

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Created by: missyfrose

Pronunciation: con-soo-min-ad

Sentence: That consuminad has some serious self-esteem issues. Don't consuminate to me, I'm not your therapist!

Etymology: consumer, inadequate

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Created by: yellowbird

Pronunciation: ty-rate

Sentence: Judy waited for the red-faced woman to wind up her tirate before holding up the little white score card on which she had written 8.5. For some reason, this seemed to make the customer even angrier.

Etymology: tirade + rate(as in product rating)

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