Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
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Tirate
Created by: yellowbird
Pronunciation: ty-rate
Sentence: Judy waited for the red-faced woman to wind up her tirate before holding up the little white score card on which she had written 8.5. For some reason, this seemed to make the customer even angrier.
Etymology: tirade + rate(as in product rating)
Cathareturn
Created by: zavijava
Pronunciation:
Sentence: After the 100th complaint that someone's Mii didn't love them anymore, Best Buy set up a separate line for people wanting to cathareturn things, with a pyschology student running customer service.
Etymology: catharsis+return Noun: Cathareturner
Tyranuservicevex
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: TYE-ran-UH-suhr-VIS-veks
Sentence: Bob, at first, an irebuyer, quickly became an tyranuservicevex, scowling at the brow, when his local cheesemaker decided to decrease the size of the holes in the emmentaler.
Etymology: Blend of TYRANUS; SERVICE & VEX. Loosely based on Tyranusaurus Rex. This creature is probably the most famous and most fearsome predator of all times (Cretaceous, 85-65 million years ago), its name meaning 'terrible king lizard'. VEX: To make angry or annoyed by little provocations; to irritate; to plague; to torment; to harass; to afflict; to trouble;
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COMMENTS:
wonderfully wacky - love it - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-13: 14:47:00
Very clever! - Mustang, 2008-11-13: 22:36:00
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Whinebuyer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne by er
Sentence: Corky McPlonk was a regular complainer to the winery. He usually had a burgundy beef, a grape gripe, a grappa grumble, a cabernet carp, a retsina regret or a white whine whimper. He was a whinebuyer they just hated to hear from...they didn't know if he drank too much or too little of their products. From Rhone moans, to Liebfraumilch laments, to Rosé rants to Muscatel mutters, he was never happy. One day he phoned and had a cork kvetch. "Your merlot is hard to open...how can I enjoy it if I can't decant it?" he bellowed. The service associate told him that the bottle would open easier if he simply unscrewed the metal cap. Shiraz shooting, it worked!
Etymology: Whine (complain;a complaint uttered in a plaintive whining way) & Buyer (Customer, patron;purchaser)
Crusstomer
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: cruss/tum/ur
Sentence: All clerks manning the crusstomer service counters should be equipped with IPODS playing soothing music with positive reinforcement lyrics.
Etymology: customer + crusty (irritable) + cuss (slang for curse)
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COMMENTS:
Shades of "Crusty the Clown." Nicely blended. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:53:00
Good word - TJayzz, 2008-11-14: 04:21:00
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Plaguetron
Created by: thegoatisbad
Pronunciation: puh-lay-ge-tron
Sentence: While Zinnia was on vacation, urgent calls were redirected to Kimberly's desk, and Kimberly hated this. Among Zinnia's tasks, she was responsible for dealing with unsatisfied customers, when these unpleased patrons were forwarded to Kimberly, all hell broke loose. "I can only call them plaguetrons" She said, "I had no idea people could be so upset about a sweater. How is it our fault that her daughter can't ever ride a horse?"
Etymology: Plague (scary things that happened in the bible and the 13th century) + Patron (a customer)
Harasshole
Created by: Tigger
Pronunciation: /hah-ras-hohl/
Sentence: Oscar had plenty of cars he needed to work on today, but for twenty minutes now he'd been stuck listening to some harasshole complain that the forty thousand mile warranty on his wife's car tires 'under normal driving conditions' should cover her repeatedly running over curbs, because, he claimed, that's how she normally drives.
Etymology: harass - to torment, as with troubles or cares; pester; persecute (Middle French, harasser "to harry") + asshole - a stupid, mean, or contemptible person, [or a donkey's poopchute, perhaps?] (Origin: 1350–1400; Middle English, arshole "anus")
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COMMENTS:
How funny!!! I can't stop laughing! Love the word, sentence and the description. Good one! - bananabender, 2008-01-16: 05:50:00
great word - Jabberwocky, 2008-01-16: 10:45:00
Funny and a great word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:23:00
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Caustomer
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kaws-tuh-mer
Sentence: Jerry is perfect for the complaint department. He can tolerate the worst caustomer because he really believes that his opinion is the only one that counts.
Etymology: caustic (severely critical or sarcastic) + customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another; buyer)
Tantrumonsters
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: tantrəmänstərs
Sentence: Reggie knew his day was shot when he saw them coming through the door. The tantrumonsters had arrived. The bus from the assisted-living home must have jettisoned its cargo. These three seemed to have nothing better to do than complain over minutia. He calls them T-Vex, Rageasaur and Triscarytops. This time he was ready for them. He threw up a bogo (buy one, get one) banner to momentarily distract them and made a dash for the stock room. It didn't take long for them to get bored and move onto another store and another customer service rep to gnaw on.
Etymology: Tantrum (an uncontrolled outburst of anger and frustration, typically in young child) + Monster (an imaginary creature that is typically large, ugly, and frightening)
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COMMENTS:
Nice blend. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:50:00
Nice story....those dinosars put the "Sore" in Thesaurus! - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:46:00
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Irebuyer
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: ahy-ur-BAHY-uhr
Sentence: Bob quickly became an irebuyer, scowling at the brow, when his local cheesemaker decided to decrease the size of the holes in the emmentaler.
Etymology: Conflation of IRE:anger, wrath, rage, & BUYER:purchaser, vendee, client
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COMMENTS:
Rhyming creations always ring my bell. Nice one! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:06:00
His argument definately had some holes in it. No holes in your word though! - bananabender, 2008-01-17: 02:27:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James