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'These Post-it Notes don't post!'

DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.

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Verboticisms

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Cathareturn

Created by: zavijava

Pronunciation:

Sentence: After the 100th complaint that someone's Mii didn't love them anymore, Best Buy set up a separate line for people wanting to cathareturn things, with a pyschology student running customer service.

Etymology: catharsis+return Noun: Cathareturner

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Cursetomer

Created by: logarithm

Pronunciation: kursstəmər

Sentence:

Etymology: From 'customer' - a person or company that buys goods or services; and 'curse' or 'cuss' - to utter obscenities or profanities.

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COMMENTS:

Or, better still, 'cusstomer', where the 'cuss' is pronounced with extra hissing sound. - logarithm, 2008-11-17: 05:53:00

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Caustomer

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kaws-tuh-mer

Sentence: Jerry is perfect for the complaint department. He can tolerate the worst caustomer because he really believes that his opinion is the only one that counts.

Etymology: caustic (severely critical or sarcastic) + customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another; buyer)

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Schmucack

Created by: courty3303

Pronunciation: sh-moo-sack

Sentence: I schmucacked that idiot.

Etymology:

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Storemonger

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: stor - mon - grrr

Sentence: Nathan was full of hostility and he took it out on everyone, especially service people. One of his favorite pastimes was venting his unhappiness and frustrations on unsuspecting customer service representatives. It was a fertile field filled with an endless supply of targets and he stealthily stalked his prey, victimizing unsuspecting clerks who were only trying to help him. On a good weekend, he might hit 35 stores, leaving a wide swath of storemonger victims. It was a verbal carnage!

Etymology: Store (A place where merchandise is offered for sale; a shop). + Monger (A person promoting something undesirable or discreditable. Often used in combination: a scandalmonger; a warmonger).

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COMMENTS:

Love the monger combination -esp. the obscure ones such as : Lovemonger, fashionmonger, pardonmonger, statemonger, insect-monger, miracle-monger, massmonger, boroughmonger, wordmonger, questmonger, phrasemonger, jobmonger, loanmonger, conspiracy-monger, legacy-monger, dietmonger, technomonger, scammonger etc,. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:23:00

So a Viagra pitchman is a longermonger?? - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:38:00

Just saw the word "joymonger" on the UK cable channel. Perhaps, a viagra pitchman is a longerjoymonger ?? - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-14: 06:45:00

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Bullygoat

Created by: bananabender

Pronunciation: bul / li / gote

Sentence: He ranted and raved about the "faulty" nose-hair clippers, complaining that no matter how many times he used them his hair kept growing back. He's such a bullygoat!

Etymology: Bull**** - nonsense, humbug / bully - a tyrannical blustering ruffian / goat - "get on one's goat" (coll) to annoy, also "act the goat" (coll) to behave foolishly

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COMMENTS:

"Damn Ram" said Nannygoat, "but I love that old Bullygoat! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:03:00

I like it! Seems to me that he very caprickious! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:27:00

Hey, that's it. That's what the guy in the picture kinda' looks like — a bleating goat! - Tigger, 2008-01-16: 21:02:00

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Custobluster

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kəstəbləstər

Sentence: The store wasn’t even open yet but there he was, Mr. Bellow. At least that’s what Carlos and his coworkers call him. He is full of custobluster, all too ready to scream and yell about whatever minor issue he could find. He doesn’t really worry Carlos that much. He can easily be distracted by the introduction of the newest ”shiny thing”.

Etymology: customer (a person or organization that buys goods or services from a store or business) + bluster (talk in a loud, aggressive, or indignant way with little effect)

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Conshrewmer

Created by: grohldberg12

Pronunciation: (Cun//shroo//mar)

Sentence:

Etymology: Consumer + Shrew

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Tirate

Created by: yellowbird

Pronunciation: ty-rate

Sentence: Judy waited for the red-faced woman to wind up her tirate before holding up the little white score card on which she had written 8.5. For some reason, this seemed to make the customer even angrier.

Etymology: tirade + rate(as in product rating)

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Losererror

Created by: Nuwanda

Pronunciation: lou-zer-air-er

Sentence: It never occurred to Melody that her computer problems might not actually be the fault of the poor guy at tech support who she berated daily. He tried, as politely as he could, to help her understand that her inability to turn on her computer was a losererror and not a hardware malfunction. Only after she accidentally stepped on the powerstrip and turned it back on did she stop calling the hapless support team.

Etymology: user error transformed into loser error.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-01-16: 01:08:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-04-12: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James