Verboticisms

Created by: missyfrose

Pronunciation: con-soo-min-ad

Sentence: That consuminad has some serious self-esteem issues. Don't consuminate to me, I'm not your therapist!

Etymology: consumer, inadequate

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: whyne by er

Sentence: Corky McPlonk was a regular complainer to the winery. He usually had a burgundy beef, a grape gripe, a grappa grumble, a cabernet carp, a retsina regret or a white whine whimper. He was a whinebuyer they just hated to hear from...they didn't know if he drank too much or too little of their products. From Rhone moans, to Liebfraumilch laments, to Rosé rants to Muscatel mutters, he was never happy. One day he phoned and had a cork kvetch. "Your merlot is hard to open...how can I enjoy it if I can't decant it?" he bellowed. The service associate told him that the bottle would open easier if he simply unscrewed the metal cap. Shiraz shooting, it worked!

Etymology: Whine (complain;a complaint uttered in a plaintive whining way) & Buyer (Customer, patron;purchaser)

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Created by: thegoatisbad

Pronunciation: puh-lay-ge-tron

Sentence: While Zinnia was on vacation, urgent calls were redirected to Kimberly's desk, and Kimberly hated this. Among Zinnia's tasks, she was responsible for dealing with unsatisfied customers, when these unpleased patrons were forwarded to Kimberly, all hell broke loose. "I can only call them plaguetrons" She said, "I had no idea people could be so upset about a sweater. How is it our fault that her daughter can't ever ride a horse?"

Etymology: Plague (scary things that happened in the bible and the 13th century) + Patron (a customer)

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: trans-fer-re-turn-ence

Sentence: A good CSR knows when an irate customer is making a transfereturnence. When a man complains about a kitchen gadget it means that he had a fight with his wife. When an irate woman argues with him about a sweater it's often because her mother made a nasty comment about it. But when someone returns Postits because they're the wrong color it often reveals some serious potty training issues.

Etymology: transference:in psychoanalysis - the process whereby emotions such as rage or hatred are unconsciously shifted from one person or object to another + return: to bring back to the original place of purchase; coming back to a place or situation

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: cruss/tum/ur

Sentence: All clerks manning the crusstomer service counters should be equipped with IPODS playing soothing music with positive reinforcement lyrics.

Etymology: customer + crusty (irritable) + cuss (slang for curse)

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COMMENTS:

Shades of "Crusty the Clown." Nicely blended. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:53:00

Good word - TJayzz, 2008-11-14: 04:21:00

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Created by: bananabender

Pronunciation: bul / li / gote

Sentence: He ranted and raved about the "faulty" nose-hair clippers, complaining that no matter how many times he used them his hair kept growing back. He's such a bullygoat!

Etymology: Bull**** - nonsense, humbug / bully - a tyrannical blustering ruffian / goat - "get on one's goat" (coll) to annoy, also "act the goat" (coll) to behave foolishly

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COMMENTS:

"Damn Ram" said Nannygoat, "but I love that old Bullygoat! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:03:00

I like it! Seems to me that he very caprickious! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:27:00

Hey, that's it. That's what the guy in the picture kinda' looks like — a bleating goat! - Tigger, 2008-01-16: 21:02:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: ahy-ur-BAHY-uhr

Sentence: Bob quickly became an irebuyer, scowling at the brow, when his local cheesemaker decided to decrease the size of the holes in the emmentaler.

Etymology: Conflation of IRE:anger, wrath, rage, & BUYER:purchaser, vendee, client

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COMMENTS:

Rhyming creations always ring my bell. Nice one! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:06:00

His argument definately had some holes in it. No holes in your word though! - bananabender, 2008-01-17: 02:27:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: tantrəmänstərs

Sentence: Reggie knew his day was shot when he saw them coming through the door. The tantrumonsters had arrived. The bus from the assisted-living home must have jettisoned its cargo. These three seemed to have nothing better to do than complain over minutia. He calls them T-Vex, Rageasaur and Triscarytops. This time he was ready for them. He threw up a bogo (buy one, get one) banner to momentarily distract them and made a dash for the stock room. It didn't take long for them to get bored and move onto another store and another customer service rep to gnaw on.

Etymology: Tantrum (an uncontrolled outburst of anger and frustration, typically in young child) + Monster (an imaginary creature that is typically large, ugly, and frightening)

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COMMENTS:

Nice blend. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:50:00

Nice story....those dinosars put the "Sore" in Thesaurus! - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:46:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: payn tron

Sentence: Most customers are nice. They are happy you help them, grateful when you go out of your way to serve them. They are true patrons, they pay your wages. Then there is the paintron, he makes you earn your wages and then some. Although he is only one in a hundred, he makes noise and aggravation enough for the other ninety-nine. You may not remember all the nice ones, but you can never forget the bad ones. Thank goodness they are in the minority!

Etymology: Pain (emotional distress; a fundamental feeling that people try to avoid;a bothersome annoying person)& Patron (client, customer)

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: creep/zoom/er

Sentence: The worst job at Sears is the product return desk which attracts one creepsumer after another.

Etymology: CREEPSUMER noun - from CREEP (an annoyingly unpleasant, or repulsive person) + CONSUMER (one that acquires goods, or services for direct use )

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COMMENTS:

Good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:51:00

Excellent - Mustang, 2008-11-13: 22:36:00

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