Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Infermidate
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: in-FIR-meh-dayt
Sentence: Waldo would try to infermidate customer service clerks with belligerently exaggerated complaints about products or services.
Etymology: Blend of 'infer' (to hint; imply; suggest)and 'intimidate' (to make timid; fill with fear)
Customonster
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kəstəmänstər
Sentence: Oh no, here he comes Jody said to herself. Her customonster liked to come in at least once a week to make himself feel powerful by chewing on her for a while. He would go out of his way to find an item with some sort of scratch or blemish. Then he would demand a discount. She finally turned the tables on him when she caught him scratching a piece of her merchandise. She scolded him like he was a naughty puppy. She never saw him again.
Etymology: customer (a person or organization that buys goods or services from a store or business) + monster (an imaginary creature that is typically large, ugly, and frightening)
Crusstomer
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: cruss/tum/ur
Sentence: All clerks manning the crusstomer service counters should be equipped with IPODS playing soothing music with positive reinforcement lyrics.
Etymology: customer + crusty (irritable) + cuss (slang for curse)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Shades of "Crusty the Clown." Nicely blended. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:53:00
Good word - TJayzz, 2008-11-14: 04:21:00
----------------------------
Whinestein
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne styne
Sentence: Mrs. Gorgonzola was a real Whinestein. You know the type of customer we mean...one who complained about everything, was a retail snob and showed off her ignorance at the same time. Every week she entered the Gourmet Cheese Shoppe in the Mall called Cheese Louise. And every week she berated the owner, Louise, with her usual rants: "These Emmenthalers were no Gouda...I could barely Edam!"; "It's a Feta Accompli that this Roquefort will be Stilton my Children's Gruyereth!"; "Why is this Fontina the Mozza expensive cheese in the Store?"; "I simply Camembert to try the Chevre...it makes me Cheddar to think what's in it!" "Must they alwheys make Swiss Cheese with holes in it...what poor workmanship!";"My daughter, Velveeta, Brie-ds American Cheese Dogs and is Whey beyond her years!" and "Why does it always smell like milk gone bad in this Shoppe...couldn't you come up with a grater scent?" Louise would smile and nod and take her money, thinking to herself, I hate her, but I'm Fondue, my little greenbacks. Yes, Louise thought it appropriate to have a little Whine with her Cheese!
Etymology: Whine (to moan and complain in a plaintive manner) & Stein (a mug) & Einstein (a genius,someone who has exceptional intellectual ability and originality)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
You're examples are the best...a little cheesy, perhaps, but I've found none butter! - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
I meant your, not you're. - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
What a grate story. Lets Rock n Rocqefort!! - rombus, 2008-11-13: 12:53:00
Very clever - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:49:00
Nothing like a fromage a trois! Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-11-14: 23:54:00
----------------------------
Crusstomer
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: cruss/tum/ur
Sentence: All clerks manning the crusstomer service counters should be equipped with IPODS playing soothing music with positive reinforcement lyrics.
Etymology: customer + crusty (irritable) + cuss (slang for curse)
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Maybe if they listen to the soft rock of "Bread" they won't be so crusty! Another great word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:21:00
----------------------------
Storemonger
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: stor - mon - grrr
Sentence: Nathan was full of hostility and he took it out on everyone, especially service people. One of his favorite pastimes was venting his unhappiness and frustrations on unsuspecting customer service representatives. It was a fertile field filled with an endless supply of targets and he stealthily stalked his prey, victimizing unsuspecting clerks who were only trying to help him. On a good weekend, he might hit 35 stores, leaving a wide swath of storemonger victims. It was a verbal carnage!
Etymology: Store (A place where merchandise is offered for sale; a shop). + Monger (A person promoting something undesirable or discreditable. Often used in combination: a scandalmonger; a warmonger).
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Love the monger combination -esp. the obscure ones such as : Lovemonger, fashionmonger, pardonmonger, statemonger, insect-monger, miracle-monger, massmonger, boroughmonger, wordmonger, questmonger, phrasemonger, jobmonger, loanmonger, conspiracy-monger, legacy-monger, dietmonger, technomonger, scammonger etc,. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:23:00
So a Viagra pitchman is a longermonger?? - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:38:00
Just saw the word "joymonger" on the UK cable channel. Perhaps, a viagra pitchman is a longerjoymonger ?? - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-14: 06:45:00
----------------------------
Whinebuyer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne by er
Sentence: Corky McPlonk was a regular complainer to the winery. He usually had a burgundy beef, a grape gripe, a grappa grumble, a cabernet carp, a retsina regret or a white whine whimper. He was a whinebuyer they just hated to hear from...they didn't know if he drank too much or too little of their products. From Rhone moans, to Liebfraumilch laments, to Rosé rants to Muscatel mutters, he was never happy. One day he phoned and had a cork kvetch. "Your merlot is hard to open...how can I enjoy it if I can't decant it?" he bellowed. The service associate told him that the bottle would open easier if he simply unscrewed the metal cap. Shiraz shooting, it worked!
Etymology: Whine (complain;a complaint uttered in a plaintive whining way) & Buyer (Customer, patron;purchaser)
Irebuyer
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: ahy-ur-BAHY-uhr
Sentence: Bob quickly became an irebuyer, scowling at the brow, when his local cheesemaker decided to decrease the size of the holes in the emmentaler.
Etymology: Conflation of IRE:anger, wrath, rage, & BUYER:purchaser, vendee, client
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
Rhyming creations always ring my bell. Nice one! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:06:00
His argument definately had some holes in it. No holes in your word though! - bananabender, 2008-01-17: 02:27:00
----------------------------
Bullygoat
Created by: bananabender
Pronunciation: bul / li / gote
Sentence: He ranted and raved about the "faulty" nose-hair clippers, complaining that no matter how many times he used them his hair kept growing back. He's such a bullygoat!
Etymology: Bull**** - nonsense, humbug / bully - a tyrannical blustering ruffian / goat - "get on one's goat" (coll) to annoy, also "act the goat" (coll) to behave foolishly
----------------------------
COMMENTS:
"Damn Ram" said Nannygoat, "but I love that old Bullygoat! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:03:00
I like it! Seems to me that he very caprickious! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:27:00
Hey, that's it. That's what the guy in the picture kinda' looks like — a bleating goat! - Tigger, 2008-01-16: 21:02:00
----------------------------
Flustomer
Created by: Biscotti
Pronunciation: flus toh mer
Sentence: Working in retail, I've had many a flustomer in my face!
Etymology: Fluster (angry, upset) + Customer (one who buys things from someone else)
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James