Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
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Foolabluster
Created by: Redrover
Pronunciation: fool-uh-bluster
Sentence: Mark's earbuds are so small that his customers aren't even aware that he can't hear a single word of their foolablustering.
Etymology: fool= a silly or stupid person; a person who lacks judgment or sense bluster = noisy, empty threats or protests
Whinexpert
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyn ex pert
Sentence: John came into the venders every week, bought 2 bottles of the chaepest plonk he could find and then complained about them next week. He was quite the whinexpert and grew so annoying, the finally barred him from the shop.
Etymology: Whine (complain in annoying manner) & Wordplay on Wine Expert (oenophile;connoisseur)
Whinebuyer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne by er
Sentence: Corky McPlonk was a regular complainer to the winery. He usually had a burgundy beef, a grape gripe, a grappa grumble, a cabernet carp, a retsina regret or a white whine whimper. He was a whinebuyer they just hated to hear from...they didn't know if he drank too much or too little of their products. From Rhone moans, to Liebfraumilch laments, to Rosé rants to Muscatel mutters, he was never happy. One day he phoned and had a cork kvetch. "Your merlot is hard to open...how can I enjoy it if I can't decant it?" he bellowed. The service associate told him that the bottle would open easier if he simply unscrewed the metal cap. Shiraz shooting, it worked!
Etymology: Whine (complain;a complaint uttered in a plaintive whining way) & Buyer (Customer, patron;purchaser)
Fusstomer
Created by: Dougalistic
Pronunciation: Fuss-to-merr
Sentence: He came over to me giving it all that' saying how he was going to nail my head to the floor, just because I couldn't give him a refund on those damm Haribo's. He was a complete fusstomer.
Etymology: Fuss - To make a nuisance or commotion (general annoying git) and Customer.
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COMMENTS:
Nice word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:24:00
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Flustomer
Created by: Biscotti
Pronunciation: flus toh mer
Sentence: Working in retail, I've had many a flustomer in my face!
Etymology: Fluster (angry, upset) + Customer (one who buys things from someone else)
Storemonger
Created by: mweinmann
Pronunciation: stor - mon - grrr
Sentence: Nathan was full of hostility and he took it out on everyone, especially service people. One of his favorite pastimes was venting his unhappiness and frustrations on unsuspecting customer service representatives. It was a fertile field filled with an endless supply of targets and he stealthily stalked his prey, victimizing unsuspecting clerks who were only trying to help him. On a good weekend, he might hit 35 stores, leaving a wide swath of storemonger victims. It was a verbal carnage!
Etymology: Store (A place where merchandise is offered for sale; a shop). + Monger (A person promoting something undesirable or discreditable. Often used in combination: a scandalmonger; a warmonger).
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COMMENTS:
Love the monger combination -esp. the obscure ones such as : Lovemonger, fashionmonger, pardonmonger, statemonger, insect-monger, miracle-monger, massmonger, boroughmonger, wordmonger, questmonger, phrasemonger, jobmonger, loanmonger, conspiracy-monger, legacy-monger, dietmonger, technomonger, scammonger etc,. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:23:00
So a Viagra pitchman is a longermonger?? - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:38:00
Just saw the word "joymonger" on the UK cable channel. Perhaps, a viagra pitchman is a longerjoymonger ?? - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-14: 06:45:00
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Infermidate
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: in-FIR-meh-dayt
Sentence: Waldo would try to infermidate customer service clerks with belligerently exaggerated complaints about products or services.
Etymology: Blend of 'infer' (to hint; imply; suggest)and 'intimidate' (to make timid; fill with fear)
Consuminad
Created by: missyfrose
Pronunciation: con-soo-min-ad
Sentence: That consuminad has some serious self-esteem issues. Don't consuminate to me, I'm not your therapist!
Etymology: consumer, inadequate
Bullygoat
Created by: bananabender
Pronunciation: bul / li / gote
Sentence: He ranted and raved about the "faulty" nose-hair clippers, complaining that no matter how many times he used them his hair kept growing back. He's such a bullygoat!
Etymology: Bull**** - nonsense, humbug / bully - a tyrannical blustering ruffian / goat - "get on one's goat" (coll) to annoy, also "act the goat" (coll) to behave foolishly
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COMMENTS:
"Damn Ram" said Nannygoat, "but I love that old Bullygoat! Clever! - silveryaspen, 2008-01-16: 08:03:00
I like it! Seems to me that he very caprickious! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:27:00
Hey, that's it. That's what the guy in the picture kinda' looks like — a bleating goat! - Tigger, 2008-01-16: 21:02:00
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Cursetomer
Created by: logarithm
Pronunciation: kursstəmər
Sentence:
Etymology: From 'customer' - a person or company that buys goods or services; and 'curse' or 'cuss' - to utter obscenities or profanities.
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COMMENTS:
Or, better still, 'cusstomer', where the 'cuss' is pronounced with extra hissing sound. - logarithm, 2008-11-17: 05:53:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James