Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v., To share your feelings with a customer service representative by using a perceived product deficiency to express your own sense of inadequacy and/or deep seated rage against the world. n., An irritating or annoying customer.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Shopabrawlic
Created by: rombus
Pronunciation: shop - a - brawl - ick
Sentence: John had a really nasty problem that he couldn't seem to control. He often got into intense arguments with shop clerks and check-out personnel in stores over everything from the prices of goods to their functionality. His shopabrawlic behavior was out of control and he couldn't seem to help himself. He felt so much better after an argument that he often bought things just for the thrill of the argument.
Etymology: The word shop (which means to purchase or look for) is combined with brawl (to quarrel angrily or disruptively). This is also kind of smashed in with alcoholic to denote an addiction to the behavior.
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COMMENTS:
very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-11-13: 14:47:00
Spot on. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:48:00
And the Shopabrawlics all come out at the full moon...oh, that's today! Good Word, timely. - Nosila, 2008-11-13: 20:48:00
Great! - TJayzz, 2008-11-14: 04:23:00
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Infermidate
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: in-FIR-meh-dayt
Sentence: Waldo would try to infermidate customer service clerks with belligerently exaggerated complaints about products or services.
Etymology: Blend of 'infer' (to hint; imply; suggest)and 'intimidate' (to make timid; fill with fear)
Schmucack
Created by: courty3303
Pronunciation: sh-moo-sack
Sentence: I schmucacked that idiot.
Etymology:
Cursetommer
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: kurs tom mer
Sentence: He returned the swearword dictionary with plenty of loud cursetommer. "What a cursetommer!" said the courtesy counter lady, "Why he probably wrote that book!"
Etymology: Interplay of curse and customer. Curse having the double meaning of (1)swearing (using bad negative words) or (2) casting a spell, usually an evil one. Customer meaning one who purchases goods or services.
Caustomer
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kaws-tuh-mer
Sentence: Jerry is perfect for the complaint department. He can tolerate the worst caustomer because he really believes that his opinion is the only one that counts.
Etymology: caustic (severely critical or sarcastic) + customer (a person who purchases goods or services from another; buyer)
Whinebuyer
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne by er
Sentence: Corky McPlonk was a regular complainer to the winery. He usually had a burgundy beef, a grape gripe, a grappa grumble, a cabernet carp, a retsina regret or a white whine whimper. He was a whinebuyer they just hated to hear from...they didn't know if he drank too much or too little of their products. From Rhone moans, to Liebfraumilch laments, to Rosé rants to Muscatel mutters, he was never happy. One day he phoned and had a cork kvetch. "Your merlot is hard to open...how can I enjoy it if I can't decant it?" he bellowed. The service associate told him that the bottle would open easier if he simply unscrewed the metal cap. Shiraz shooting, it worked!
Etymology: Whine (complain;a complaint uttered in a plaintive whining way) & Buyer (Customer, patron;purchaser)
Whinestein
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: whyne styne
Sentence: Mrs. Gorgonzola was a real Whinestein. You know the type of customer we mean...one who complained about everything, was a retail snob and showed off her ignorance at the same time. Every week she entered the Gourmet Cheese Shoppe in the Mall called Cheese Louise. And every week she berated the owner, Louise, with her usual rants: "These Emmenthalers were no Gouda...I could barely Edam!"; "It's a Feta Accompli that this Roquefort will be Stilton my Children's Gruyereth!"; "Why is this Fontina the Mozza expensive cheese in the Store?"; "I simply Camembert to try the Chevre...it makes me Cheddar to think what's in it!" "Must they alwheys make Swiss Cheese with holes in it...what poor workmanship!";"My daughter, Velveeta, Brie-ds American Cheese Dogs and is Whey beyond her years!" and "Why does it always smell like milk gone bad in this Shoppe...couldn't you come up with a grater scent?" Louise would smile and nod and take her money, thinking to herself, I hate her, but I'm Fondue, my little greenbacks. Yes, Louise thought it appropriate to have a little Whine with her Cheese!
Etymology: Whine (to moan and complain in a plaintive manner) & Stein (a mug) & Einstein (a genius,someone who has exceptional intellectual ability and originality)
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COMMENTS:
You're examples are the best...a little cheesy, perhaps, but I've found none butter! - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
I meant your, not you're. - Nuwanda, 2008-11-13: 11:54:00
What a grate story. Lets Rock n Rocqefort!! - rombus, 2008-11-13: 12:53:00
Very clever - OZZIEBOB, 2008-11-13: 16:49:00
Nothing like a fromage a trois! Cheers! - Nosila, 2008-11-14: 23:54:00
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Conshrewmer
Created by: grohldberg12
Pronunciation: (Cun//shroo//mar)
Sentence:
Etymology: Consumer + Shrew
Crusstomer
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: cruss/tum/ur
Sentence: All clerks manning the crusstomer service counters should be equipped with IPODS playing soothing music with positive reinforcement lyrics.
Etymology: customer + crusty (irritable) + cuss (slang for curse)
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COMMENTS:
Maybe if they listen to the soft rock of "Bread" they won't be so crusty! Another great word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-01-16: 16:21:00
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Transfereturnence
Created by: mrskellyscl
Pronunciation: trans-fer-re-turn-ence
Sentence: A good CSR knows when an irate customer is making a transfereturnence. When a man complains about a kitchen gadget it means that he had a fight with his wife. When an irate woman argues with him about a sweater it's often because her mother made a nasty comment about it. But when someone returns Postits because they're the wrong color it often reveals some serious potty training issues.
Etymology: transference:in psychoanalysis - the process whereby emotions such as rage or hatred are unconsciously shifted from one person or object to another + return: to bring back to the original place of purchase; coming back to a place or situation
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James