Verboticisms

Created by: bigdog

Pronunciation: mahl-ah-pube-izm

Sentence: Ever since Gerry Atric started taking his viagra cocktail, he's demonstrating all sorts of malapubisms - started skateboarding at 70 and suddenly everyone's a "dude"...

Etymology: malapropism (incorrect or undesirable word usage) + pubescence

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COMMENTS:

just saw this - very clever! - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-18: 14:22:00

Takes me back - where? - ajcor, 2007-06-20: 19:12:00

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Created by: Katisms1

Pronunciation: OOPS! - SHOULD READ: Sprydefect! (Pron: SPRYIDE-e-fekked. Fekked, like my typing. I can't believe I managed to misspell a word I made up! ;-)

Sentence: While Granny was initially happy the little pill had brought some lovin' back into their bedroom, being awakened ten times a night by an urgent poking in the small of her back was rapidly becoming an unwelcomed sprydefect of the drug.

Etymology: spry + defect

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: joo ven eyl de lin kon se kwens

Sentence: Mabel was on the phone to her husband Walter's doctor about his most recent prescription and it's bizarre side effects. She asked him if was supposed to make him act young and immature again. "No", said, Dr. Gerry N. Tologist, "it's just supposed to revive his libido". "Well", said Mabel, "It has not done that because he is too busy listening to rap music, wearing his pants too low and acting like a punk. In fact, he's been arrested for driving his power chair too fast and spraying graffiti all over the neighbours' fences. I am throwing out these pills, because I cannot live with the juveniledelinconsequence of his actions!"

Etymology: Juvenile Deliquent (a young offender) & Consequence (aftermath;result;outcome of an action)

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COMMENTS:

wow what long word, it works too - sanssouci, 2010-01-13: 14:59:00

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Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: cah-coon-see-kwens

Sentence: sure, i had extra vitality, but the appearance of 15 superfluous nipples was an upsetting cocoonsequence

Etymology: consequence, cocoon[the movie...with steve guttenberg]

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COMMENTS:

too much catnip pill error, i'd say - galwaywegian, 2007-06-18: 06:18:00

Sheesh, that's some breast unhancement! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-18: 09:38:00

She must have misread the part where it said it would improve her mammary. unrelate: Everybody knows Wilford Brimley was the star of Cocoon! - jadenguy, 2007-06-18: 11:51:00

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Created by: rephil

Pronunciation: pawnse

Sentence: Dr. A: "How did the procedure work out for Mrs. Hyde?" Nurse B: "The face lift turned out great -- got her a new boy toy. But he left over the stretch marks from the lipo -- so that was a bit of a ponce.

Etymology: Colloquial -- after Juan Ponce De Leon, first Spanish governor of Puerto Rico and legendary seeker of the Fountain of Youth.

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Created by: bubbos

Pronunciation: You-ther-apy

Sentence: A heavy dose of youtherapy has made John realize what he's been missing all these years.

Etymology: Youth + therapy

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Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: teen-men-chah

Sentence: After a trip to the stud farmacologist and eating two boxes of Wild Oats 'n' Bran, Bob got a wicked case of Teenmentia. His neighbors watched in horror as he chased his poor old wife Alice around the yard while simulataneously crooning the Barry White tune "Let's Get It On."

Etymology: teen, dementia

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COMMENTS:

Got my vote! - remistram, 2007-06-18: 14:38:00

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Created by: texmom

Pronunciation: re-vivi-sect-shun

Sentence: By having the revivisection done, Mr. Jones felt like climbing rocks again.

Etymology: re- do again vivi - live section - procedure

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Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: Vie Act Tra

Sentence: Eugene's viactra had gotten so bad, he just asked his granddaughter to the prom.

Etymology: Viagra + Actor

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Created by: mplsbohemian

Pronunciation: reh-troh-KUHSH-uhn

Sentence: When Alex's father purchased a Maserati for his fiftieth birthday, the retrocussions were embarrassing, especially when Alex would introduce girlfriends to his gold-laden, shades-wearing, slang-misusing dad.

Etymology: retro- + repercussion

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COMMENTS:

Came alive when read in the sentence -- nice! - rephil, 2007-06-18: 10:15:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rep tyl dis funk shun

Sentence: When Stan's libido started to take long vacations, he went to the doctor to get some help in the form of little blue pills. After taking one or two, he started displaying unusual side effects. One of the more disturbing was what his wife Joyce called his reptiledysfunction. He ran around like a randy iguana. He stood in a menacing stance, tongue flicking in and out of his mouth, singing, "We're off to see the Lizard, the wonderful Lizard of Awes". Time to get that dosage checked...

Etymology: Reptile (any cold-blooded vertebrate) & Dysfunction ((medicine) any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part) and Wordplay on Erectile Dysfunction (the reason they made Viagra and such products-impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection of his penis)

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Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: ther-a-pew-tix

Sentence: Jim felt young again after he started taking the pills. He had endless energy and couldn't sit still. Unfortunately, the side effect was an uncurable nervous tic, where his head twitched manically all day and night. His wife left him and everyone pointed and laughed at him in the streets. But to him the therapeuttics were worth it. They'd all be dead and he'd be living it up in Ibiza.

Etymology: therapeutic (helpful healing) + tic (persistent muscular contraction)

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: yoo/thuh/ney/zee/ast

Sentence: Viagra and some other new miracle drugs are a form of youthanasia. With these drugs, young ideas, images and urgings are brought about in an old, incapable body.

Etymology: youth + euthanasia

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Created by: jadenguy

Pronunciation: pan ay see ak sen shu ay shon

Sentence: Little did Thomas realize that the memory pills would have this level of panaceaccentation. Soon, he was remembering the entire history of his family, learning deeper and darker secrets than he'd ever hoped to imagine, having seen in reminiscent first hand the moment of his conception, and what his father was doing at the other side of town when it happened.

Etymology: panacea + accentuation

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COMMENTS:

The ashes of the latter half of last week are beneath me, forgotten, as I am reborn, at work again, assuming this week will suck as well. also, if you wanted to know what his dad was doing, *spoilers* probably drinking? - jadenguy, 2007-06-18: 11:38:00

His father must have been well hung -over to have managed it from the other side of town - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-18: 11:49:00

that wasn't exactly the case, but let's just say they decided to stay together once the killherinsticts subsided. - jadenguy, 2007-06-18: 11:59:00

His mother was a peter panderer. (oops) - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-18: 13:00:00

Actually I think she only dated Dicks - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-18: 14:25:00

She dated John's son for a schlong time - maybe he was the father. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-18: 15:20:00

I think you're being a bit hard on John's son - he always practised safe sex - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-18: 15:43:00

HA! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-18: 15:53:00

i warned you guys about getting cocky with puns! i'm really gonna have to drop The Hammer sometimes. it's getting hard to come here night after night. - jadenguy, 2007-06-18: 17:27:00

OMG, too funny! I guess the pen-is mightier than the sword! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-18: 17:55:00

hehe - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-18: 19:38:00

So, she dated John's son, and gave birth to Thomas, but where was John's Thomas? And how could she have known that Thomas wood grow into such a firm specimen? Sure, he seemed like a rigid tool to all the dorks he played ball with, but the staff found it hard to yank him. Of course, most of the jerks were jealous, having seen him whack multiple times with his club. Many of them attributed his exceptional schmuck to his years of wang chun training in Hung Dong. By the bellend he was ready to toss in the towel. - Clayton, 2007-06-18: 19:52:00

Clayton - you really are the master..... - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-18: 19:58:00

I try. How's that for a happy ending? - Clayton, 2007-06-18: 23:35:00

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Created by: ziggy41

Pronunciation: Add-oce-les-sent

Sentence: After two hours of a spoonful of the medicine, I could clearly see the adoselescents of it. She was whining in a feeble position on the floor, and all functions of "going" in the toilet became null and void.

Etymology: Adolescent (a young person) + dose (a prescribed amount of medicine)

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Created by: Discoveria

Pronunciation: ree-PEW-burr-tyze

Sentence: Gerald repubertised on Viagra, regaining the physical competence (and mental incompetence) of a teenager.

Etymology: re- (prefix) + puberty (physiological process of sexual maturation) + -ise (suffix)

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COMMENTS:

Haha! :) Voted! - Rhyme79, 2012-10-11: 10:18:00

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Created by: marinus

Pronunciation: geri-pee-di-o-morph-ism

Sentence: Grandpa said the pills made him feel twenty years younger, but after he broke his hip mountain biking we began to suspect that it was that geripediomophism the new commercials warned about.

Etymology: geriatric (old). pediatric (young). ideo- greek prefix "image" morph- form

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Created by: Rhyme79

Pronunciation: frisk-ee-fighs

Sentence: Dr., I want to friskifize myself. Can I get something over the counter, or should I try a shady, grey-market website?

Etymology: Frisky- energetic, horny. Suffix 'ize' to infer the subject becoming the nature of the verb.

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: yoo/thuh/ney/zee/ast

Sentence: Viagra and some other new miracle drugs are a form of youthanasia. With these drugs, young ideas, images and urgings are brought about in an old, incapable body.

Etymology: youth + euthanasia

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COMMENTS:

I always thought Youth In Asia was an evangelical missionary program... - rephil, 2007-06-18: 10:14:00

I thought Yoot in Asia was a documentary about Seaman creator Yoot Saito. - jadenguy, 2007-06-18: 11:45:00

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Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: re/act/ten

Sentence: Istead of giving him Reactin the pharmacist gave him Reacten. His wife couldn't figure out why he was dressing like Denis the Menace

Etymology: reactin + ten

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈbækˌlæps/

Sentence: Since I no longer owned any Quicksilver t-shirts or jams, the effects of the backlapse were mild, and I merely spent the day playing Prince of Persia.

Etymology: From backlash + relapse

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: medidātng

Sentence: Since Edith passed Richard has had little interest in re-kindling his love life but his doctor has introduced him to a new sport; medidating. A couple of little pills give him the redumb to seek out the company of women with confidunce.

Etymology: medicate (administer medicine or a drug to someone) + dating (a social or romantic appointment or engagement)

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COMMENTS:

clever... - mweinmann, 2010-01-12: 07:41:00

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: vi-ag-gra-vate

Sentence: Herb was feeling like a young buck again; however, Martha was becoming viaggravated because he kept following her around the house, making lewd comments and showing off what was left of his scrawny body. Exasperated, she dumped his prescription down the garbage disposal, tossed ice water in his lap and left to play bingo.

Etymology: viagra: prescription for a certain male dysfunctional condition + aggravate: to rouse to exasperation; annoy

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COMMENTS:

viagreat word! - Nosila, 2010-01-12: 07:08:00

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Created by: karenanne

Pronunciation: ree JOO ven ay teez

Sentence: Randy has entered his rejuveneighties - that time of life with renewed vigor and the feeling that he should finish all those items on his "Bucket List" before it's too late. He also notices that many women eye him, and therefore says magnanimously that he should "make the rounds" and "give them what they want." But the main reason they pay attention to him is that he's one of the few available men remaining.

Etymology: rejuvenate + eighties (age)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: tess-TOST-ehr-ram-paij

Sentence: Harleigh was a very sedate and well behaved senior citizen until he began taking some 'new age' suppliments he got thru a TV offer and after a few days on the therapy he went on a testosterage, not only frightening his wife, Heloise, but wearing her to a frazzle as well.

Etymology: Blend of 'testosterone' (n. the sex hormone, C 19 H 28 O 2 , secreted by the testes, that stimulates the development of male sex organs, secondary sexual traits, and sperm) and 'rampage' (n. violent or excited behavior that is reckless, uncontrolled, or destructive)

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: slide/eefekt

Sentence: The slideefect to the new medication made Bob wear baggy pants that hung low on his hips and let his underwear show. It gave a whole new meaning to slip slidin away

Etymology: slide + side effect

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COMMENTS:

Glad you put that song in my head. "Let's Get It On" was kinda inappropriate for work. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-18: 06:54:00

Excellent word. - ErWenn, 2007-06-18: 12:22:00

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Created by: sanssouci

Pronunciation: Ree Flick Sir Lies

Sentence: I hesitated outside the brightly decorated shop and peered through the window. The shop was called Medimagic, it had only been trading for a month but already the business had got quiet a good reputation here in our little village of Greenwood, especially amongst the older community. Just the other day, while I was sitting on my wooden bench, relaxing in the afternoon sun outside my old little cottage. I was flabergasted to observe an energetic figure running towards me, my old mate Harold, 85 years old and there he was full of life like a sixteen year old lad! "They sell this herbal remedy George! They call it Relixerlize, I don't know what they put in it. It must be magic, look at me! I'm on fire" he loudly proclaimed, dancing around on my daffadils. Now here I was, curiosity got the better of me and I wanted a bit of what Harold had got. I stepped inside, I was getting myself some Relixerlize.

Etymology: reflex + elixer + revitalize = relixerlize reflex 1. noting or pertaining to an involuntary response to a stimulus 2. occurring in reaction; responsive. elixir 2.A substance believed to maintain life indefinitely. Also called elixir of life. 3. A substance or medicine believed to have the power to cure all ills. revitalize 1. to give new life to. 2. to give new vitality or vigor to.

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Created by: ajcor

Pronunciation: as it sounds

Sentence: Cyril suffered delightedly from PhonyPubePoints after taking his herbal remedy for hair loss and ingrowing toe nails.

Etymology: Phony - as in fake Pube as in pubescent = youth Points as in an unexpected hardening of personal protubing muscle = tent pegs

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: joo-vuh-skrip

Sentence: Willy is so happy with his new juvescrip for Cialis. Just like in the commercial he installed two bathtubs in the backyard. Now he needs to figure out how to get his wife in the other tub and what this has to do with sex.

Etymology: juvenile (young; youthful) + scrip (a prescription, as for a drug)

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: froli - su - tik - ul

Sentence: Mabel was drawn along on one of Elmer's froliceutical adventures after he popped one of the new pills his doctor prescribed. The craziness lasted well past supper time.

Etymology: frolic, pharmaceutical

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Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: there-ap-oops

Sentence: Dr. Evil didn't warn Albert & Lena about possible side effects or that therapoops is known to occur in older people.

Etymology: therapy + oops!

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COMMENTS:

I think that this word also describes that "cleansing" diet. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-18: 12:53:00

like the liver detox thingy? - remistram, 2007-06-18: 14:36:00

Yep, the dietrhea. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-18: 14:39:00

but of course...is dietrhea yours? - remistram, 2007-06-18: 15:11:00

If you mean have I ever tried that dietrhea - no. I'd likely gag on the tonic shitzer. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-18: 15:23:00

I think that's a runs-on sentence. - Clayton, 2007-06-18: 19:55:00

you guys areeeebbjbbb....sorry i slipped...its hard to type at the moment because i'm sitting on a loose stool - rikboyee, 2007-06-18: 21:21:00

ok enough verbal diarrhea! (my apologies...) - remistram, 2007-06-19: 09:47:00

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Created by: jermainechambers44

Pronunciation: Tie-ger-wood-ical

Sentence: Agnas wanted to light a little fire in the bedroom,not burn down the town.She knew then that it could be nothing other than a case of Tigerwoodical,that been plagueing the old-folks home since they got the golf channel.

Etymology:

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: rijoōvəninē

Sentence: Walter was having issues with his circulation. A side effect of his new prescription is increased blood flow to certain underused parts of his anatomy. His wife amused and bemused by his rejuveninny behavior.

Etymology: rejuvenate (make someone or something look or feel younger) + ninny (a foolish person)

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: satt n eye t fee vur

Sentence: well, you could tell by the way he used his walk, his satnitefever turned his brain to chalk.

Etymology: fever, saturday night fever

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COMMENTS:

Travolta? I hardly know her! - Clayton, 2007-06-18: 19:56:00

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Created by: Clayton

Pronunciation: man-uh-fruh-STREY-shuhn

Sentence: A bad string of luck for old Joe. Because of his trick knee, he couldn't even walk the dog or rock the cradle anymore. With each new manifrustration, the constant ups and downs of having been a complete yo-yo throughout his life, Joe was ever closer to winding it all up. Maybe he should just put it to sleep already.

Etymology: manifestation + frustration

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COMMENTS:

did you know - the first yo-yos were made of clay? hmmm - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-18: 12:00:00

Love the sentence - it's knot every day you get to experience a 'time warp' in an 'elevator' and take a trip 'around the world' - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-18: 12:25:00

Clay, huh? I hadn't realized that, but it makes sense. But of course I have a great affinity for yo-yos, and pocketwatches, and spiders... anything filipendulous. - Clayton, 2007-06-18: 19:27:00

ah and your real name is Peter Parker and you're a journalist - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-18: 19:36:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rep tyle dis funk shun

Sentence: "Doctor, Doctor" said Maude into the phone, "Those pills you gave Ed are making him act like a horny toad and an iguana who wanna...what's wrong with him?" The Doctor calmly replied, "He's just suffering from reptiledysfunction. He will go through stages where he will become a lounge lizard, play "Karma Chameleon"; vote for Newt Gingrich and redo your home in Art Gecko style. Just Monitor him and call me in the morning".

Etymology: Reptile (cold-blooded vertebrate) Dysfunction (any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part) & Wordplay on Erectile Dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection of his penis)

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COMMENTS:

Lol, how many reptile puns can you fit in?! You are clearly talented! ;) Made me smile. - Rhyme79, 2012-10-11: 10:23:00

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: ther-age-pew-trick

Sentence: The tragedy was that her older husband had only wanted to surprise her for her birthday, but instead the theragepeutrick resulted in him spending the weekend sucking on a pacifier and wetting his pants.

Etymology: therapeutic + age + trick

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COMMENTS:

gives a whole new meaning to the endearment 'Baby' - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-18: 14:23:00

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Created by: Osomatic

Pronunciation: ther + up + eek!

Sentence: Oh gosh, Grandpa's doing one-armed Marine pushups in the garden again - I wish he'd never gotten that therapeeeek.

Etymology: therapy + eek

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Created by: Pythias

Pronunciation: vi-a-tro-gen-e-sis

Sentence: Your husband's behaviour may result from a rare side effect sometimes referred to as clinical viatrogenesis. This is not necessarily a bad thing.

Etymology: Viagra + iatrogenesis ( means "brought forth by a healer" )

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Created by: Jeaneai

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Created by: serendipity9000

Pronunciation: spry-pra-duct

Sentence: The therapy had the weirdest spryproduct - he started doing cartwheels after every session!

Etymology: spry (lively or active) + product; pun on byproduct (side effect)

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COMMENTS:

Wonderful! - ErWenn, 2007-06-18: 12:22:00

Though I think your pronunciation has one too many syllables. - ErWenn, 2007-06-18: 12:23:00

I fixed the pronunciation guide - thanks! - serendipity9000, 2007-06-18: 12:30:00

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Created by: guesser

Pronunciation: Amor + oops

Sentence: Jenny, bothered by her husbands new "condition", called his Doctor to ask, "How many more mornings am I going to have to put up with his desire for Fruit Loops and Amoroops for Breakfast"?

Etymology: Amorous ( passionate ) + oops ( mistake )

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Created by: ohwtepph

Pronunciation: not-thees [thin]

Sentence: Mr. Crooks always had a problem with his ears. One day, he went to the doctor and asked, "Doctor, my ears are semi-deaf. Hell, I can't even hear my own farts." The doctor gave him a wonder medicine that was described to miraculously heal the ears. One day, the meds kicked in and he was rushed to the emergency room with the wife screaming, "Notthis! Notthis!" The emergeny room was in a mess when the medicine that the doctor gave Mr. Crooks intensified his flatus rather than aid his hearing.

Etymology: not this

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Created by: Mrgoodtimes

Pronunciation: Pu - bes - cebo

Sentence: Martha would not have told her husband that she added a multivitamin to his breakfast if she could have foreseen the pubescebo effect it would have on him, resulting in a trip to the doctor after his back went out.

Etymology: Pubescent - Placebo

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