Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
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Bugfixative
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: bug-fix-a-tiv
Sentence: Help Desk? Have you tried turning it off and on? Yes, but that last patch you pushed out has caused by beetle screensaver to become stuck and I can't do anything! Help! You'll have to go online and log a job to review the bugfixative, then we can address it. But, I can't do anything, not even go online to log a job.
Etymology: bug fix (patch) + fixative (glue, adhesive to hold everything firmly in place, makes things stick)
Blindupdate
Created by: feltcap
Pronunciation: blīndŭp-dāt'
Sentence: Similar to that uneasy feeling you get when one of your friends sets you up he was nervous going into the blindupdate. He was worried that it would result in the same kind of feeling he had on his last blind date - will it ever end!?
Etymology: blind date - a social engagement between two persons who have not previously met, update - the act of instance of bringing something up to date
Scupperdate
Created by: muffinman
Pronunciation: Scup-per-date
Sentence: n. My computer went into meltdown last night after that Windows scupperdate started by itself. v. Windows started scupperdating my laptop last night because I left it to restart by mistake.
Etymology: Scupper + update = scupperdate
Upgreyed
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: uhp grayd
Sentence: she started the upgrade five hours and the screen was still upgreyed.
Etymology: upgrade greyed
Desktopdysfunction
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: desk top dis funk shun
Sentence: You know the embarrassment, the guilt, the feelings of inadequacy, the viagravvation. Yes, we've all seen the commercials to go to your doctor. But where does your computer go when it suffers from desktopdysfunction? There's no self help groups, no printed literature. All it can do is surf the net and hope for an antidote to the new patch you've installed. The one which was supposed to increase memory and speed, but which instead creates internet impotence. Maybe somewhere there's a cure, but until there's a celebrity spokesperson or a telethon to raise funds and awareness, what's a lowly desktop to do? It's hard-breaking...
Etymology: Desktop ((computer science) the area of the screen in graphical user interfaces against which icons and windows appear) & Dysfunction ((medicine) any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part). Play on erectile dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection)
Webstuck
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: web stuk
Sentence: It takes so long for some embedded files, they should call them inbedded files, for they take all night! ET hated spyware, and wished they made spryware, a program for nimble and quick downloads. ET didn't call it a web stack, he called it a webstuck! While waiting for his software on demand to download, ET not only had time to phone home, but every one on his home planet!
Etymology: WEBSTUCK is a play on WEB STACK, Web stack is the term used to refer to software stacks in Web development environments. The stack of software, mainly comprised of open source software, will contain an operating system, Web server, database server, and programming language. One of the most most well-known web stacks is LAMP. Let us hope it will enlighten our way!
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COMMENTS:
very apt - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-23: 15:52:00
Like it - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 17:26:00
Beeee good! - Nosila, 2009-02-23: 21:48:00
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Vistahault
Created by: coachcorrie26
Pronunciation: Vista (windows operating system) hault (to stop)
Sentence: Please do not update my laptop online with all that lollygagging nonsense because it can cause a "vistahault" and crash my entire system!
Etymology: vista (meaning beautiful/wonderful view - my beautiful/wonderful computer's view through the monitor via hard-drive) will hault (stop) running and crash my entire system!
Upstallation
Created by: BitCrack
Pronunciation: like installation, with up at the beginning.
Sentence: "watch out man, that Starcraft patch gave me some major upstallation"
Etymology:
Upstall
Created by: QuantumMechanic
Pronunciation: up-stall
Sentence: I just upstalled that emergency patch, and it slowed to a crawl, before throwing an out of memory error and rebooting.
Etymology: Upgrade (load a new version) + stall (slow down or stop)
Affordapatchee
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: aff ord a pat chee
Sentence: He had his reservations. After all, this new upgrade, while inexpensive (actually free) could cost him his whole computer system. It would affect his computer Manitouls, he'd be shaman his ancestors. It was definitely accessible and affordapatchee, but it tended to slow down his hard drive, took lots of memory and stalled out his access to the Home Shopping Network and his daily dose of Verbomtomy! No good could come from that...it would be Totem bedlam. Using his Inuituition and wearing his Bow Tie and his Arrow shirt,he decided that he would buy the patch anyway...if his system crashed, he could always Sioux the manufacturers!
Etymology: Fort Apache (John Ford movie, starring John Wayne as a commander at Fort Apache, who has sympathy for Cochese and his Native followers. He is replaced (upgraded as it were) by Henry Fonda, who is not so liberal and whose arrogance causes the Natives to uprise and give the Fort trouble...relationships have to be repaired) & Afford ( be the cause or source of;be able to spare or give up) & Patch (a short set of commands to correct a bug in a computer program;a connection intended to be used for a limited time)
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COMMENTS:
Inuituition ....you crack me up, Hon! - metrohumanx, 2009-02-23: 00:53:00
love it! - galwaywegian, 2009-02-23: 07:00:00
superb injunuity! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 10:45:00
injunious.... - Mustang, 2009-02-23: 18:05:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James