Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
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Retrofret
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: reh-troh-freht
Sentence: To3m (the 3 was silent) had held onto his Commodore "Daisy" for so long that anytime he tried to update her, she pitched a retrofret.
Etymology: A play on RETROFIT, referring to an upgrade in technology + FRET, disturb or agitate
Upstallation
Created by: BitCrack
Pronunciation: like installation, with up at the beginning.
Sentence: "watch out man, that Starcraft patch gave me some major upstallation"
Etymology:
Bugfixative
Created by: petaj
Pronunciation: bug-fix-a-tiv
Sentence: Help Desk? Have you tried turning it off and on? Yes, but that last patch you pushed out has caused by beetle screensaver to become stuck and I can't do anything! Help! You'll have to go online and log a job to review the bugfixative, then we can address it. But, I can't do anything, not even go online to log a job.
Etymology: bug fix (patch) + fixative (glue, adhesive to hold everything firmly in place, makes things stick)
Giveupdate
Created by: Negatrev
Pronunciation: Giv-up-day-t
Sentence: Johnny left for lunch early as his workstation wasn't usable while it was giveupdating.
Etymology: give-up (to concede,relent) and update (to bring in line, to improve)
Appallingvista
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: app awl ing vissssssss ta
Sentence: Her laptop had become so snooty since the appalingvista, it wouldn't let her communicate with any of the "older crowd"
Etymology: appalling vista, windows vista
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COMMENTS:
Aw shucks. Her old night in shining amor got lap lanced by her laptop! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 11:14:00
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Pleasewaiteternity
Created by: GlobalGallery
Pronunciation: pleez-wayt-urn-itee
Sentence: "That site has everything" proclaimed Charles, "All the coolest games, movies, and TV shows, and it's all free". William sat there staring eagerly at the screen. He was just moments away from accessing a treasure trove of quality content. Those moments became minutes and the loading bar kept restarting. William was facing a pleasewaiternity when he realised that the promise was too good to be true and the site was a dud. Then his keyboard, mouse and screen all locked up in synchronized chaos.
Etymology: Loading please wait... + eternity (forever)
Connixion
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kon iks eon
Sentence: Although she had been advised to do so, Marianne was reluctant to install another connixion to slow down her computer.
Etymology: Connexion ( the process of bringing ideas or events together in memory or imagination) & Nix (nothing;a quantity of no importance)
Desktopdysfunction
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: desk top dis funk shun
Sentence: You know the embarrassment, the guilt, the feelings of inadequacy, the viagravvation. Yes, we've all seen the commercials to go to your doctor. But where does your computer go when it suffers from desktopdysfunction? There's no self help groups, no printed literature. All it can do is surf the net and hope for an antidote to the new patch you've installed. The one which was supposed to increase memory and speed, but which instead creates internet impotence. Maybe somewhere there's a cure, but until there's a celebrity spokesperson or a telethon to raise funds and awareness, what's a lowly desktop to do? It's hard-breaking...
Etymology: Desktop ((computer science) the area of the screen in graphical user interfaces against which icons and windows appear) & Dysfunction ((medicine) any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part). Play on erectile dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection)
Bytehog
Created by: splendiction
Pronunciation: bite hog
Sentence: Pcsity proffered many "free" softwear updates to make the computing experience faster and easier. Jake installed one such update, or bytehog, in an effort to recover information on an online application page after the page expired. Jake’s lapshlop ran for four days completing the installation, only to discover another bytehog was needed to finish it. His lapshlop was hog-bitten! And Jake thought the online application form would be easier! That bytehog!
Etymology: From byte (a unit of memory on a computer) and hog - a being that hoards or monopolizes, in this case, one's computer memory/computer bytes.
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COMMENTS:
Clever! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 21:54:00
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Adopeytablet
Created by: scrabbelicious
Pronunciation: Ah : dope : ee : tab : let
Sentence: It was no flash in the pan, Kernal Panic thought as he looked blankly at the draped screen on his new Adopeytablet. The last time this happened they told me it would be the last time this happened, so the Kernals recursion relationship with technology trundled on. I guess that's some kinda feedback loop or loop-the-loop.
Etymology: A : indefinite article : Dopey : drugged up or slow dwarf : Tablet : Pill, may be screened (6 letters). Pun on Adobe : A byword for nightmareish yet essential software, bring a tonne of RAM.
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James