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'I don't let my laptop date!'

DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".

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Verboticisms

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Blindupdate

Created by: feltcap

Pronunciation: blīndŭp-dāt'

Sentence: Similar to that uneasy feeling you get when one of your friends sets you up he was nervous going into the blindupdate. He was worried that it would result in the same kind of feeling he had on his last blind date - will it ever end!?

Etymology: blind date - a social engagement between two persons who have not previously met, update - the act of instance of bringing something up to date

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Retrofret

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: reh-troh-freht

Sentence: To3m (the 3 was silent) had held onto his Commodore "Daisy" for so long that anytime he tried to update her, she pitched a retrofret.

Etymology: A play on RETROFIT, referring to an upgrade in technology + FRET, disturb or agitate

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Busstop

Created by: otherguy

Pronunciation: bəsstäp

Sentence: The latest "gotta-install-it-or-your-computer-will-blow-up" patch to the patch to the patch turned out to be a complete busstop on my computer. (I'm writing this on a friend's laptop)

Etymology: bus: a distinct set of conductors carrying data and control signals within a computer system, to which pieces of equipment may be connected in parallel + stop: come to an end; cease to happen

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COMMENTS:

artr Ooh, sounds personal! - artr, 2009-02-23: 07:24:00

did busplug inspire you? - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 11:26:00

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Dualsnore

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: doōəlsnôr

Sentence: Ryan is diligent about winstalling every patch and wupgrade that comes along. The latest one turned his fancy dualcore processor into a dualsnore. He can't understand how his bestest-friends-ever at Windows could have let him down. Surely they couldn't have made a mistake. He decides that he must have done something wrong in downloading or winstalling the patch to the patch so he'll wait patiently for the patch to the patch to the patch.

Etymology: dual core (A multi-core processor) + snore (a snorting or grunting sound in a person's breathing while asleep)(a thing that is extremely boring)

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Vistahault

Created by: coachcorrie26

Pronunciation: Vista (windows operating system) hault (to stop)

Sentence: Please do not update my laptop online with all that lollygagging nonsense because it can cause a "vistahault" and crash my entire system!

Etymology: vista (meaning beautiful/wonderful view - my beautiful/wonderful computer's view through the monitor via hard-drive) will hault (stop) running and crash my entire system!

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Busplug

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: Just the way it looks...

Sentence: Rondo fancied himself a computer expert. When he "helped" Lulu upgrade her purloined laptop by downloading the approved version of "service pack 5", he inadvertently created a BUSPLUG similar to the "blue screen of death" so popular in the last century. Rondo's motives were pure, and he offered to buy Lulu a donut and help her "work it out"....even if it took all night!

Etymology: BUS+PLUG=BUSPLUG(busplugged, busplugging).....BUS:In computer architecture, a bus is a subsystem that transfers data between computer components inside a computer or between computers......PLUG:a piece used to fill a hole, a stopper, an obtruding or obstructing mass of material resembling a stopper, any of various devices resembling or functioning like a plug, a male fitting for making an electrical connection to a live circuit by insertion in a receptacle.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Sorry about this one, gang. I just couldn'r resist it.... - metrohumanx, 2009-02-23: 00:30:00

Hope he has some Viaoagra - Nosila, 2009-02-23: 00:46:00

metrohumanx While tecnically inaccurate, i just went with it because it was slopping over with subtlety and nuance... - metrohumanx, 2009-02-23: 01:01:00

Naughty but good, so will cut you some slaxative! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 11:20:00

BUSPLUG similar to the "blue screen of death" - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:09:00

BUSPLUG similar to the "blue screen of death" - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:10:00

WHY doesn't this site pick up the entire comment instead of just parts...???? Ugh - abrakadeborah, 2009-03-25: 14:10:00

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Pleasewaiteternity

GlobalGallery

Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: pleez-wayt-urn-itee

Sentence: "That site has everything" proclaimed Charles, "All the coolest games, movies, and TV shows, and it's all free". William sat there staring eagerly at the screen. He was just moments away from accessing a treasure trove of quality content. Those moments became minutes and the loading bar kept restarting. William was facing a pleasewaiternity when he realised that the promise was too good to be true and the site was a dud. Then his keyboard, mouse and screen all locked up in synchronized chaos.

Etymology: Loading please wait... + eternity (forever)

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Bytehog

Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: bite hog

Sentence: Pcsity proffered many "free" softwear updates to make the computing experience faster and easier. Jake installed one such update, or bytehog, in an effort to recover information on an online application page after the page expired. Jake’s lapshlop ran for four days completing the installation, only to discover another bytehog was needed to finish it. His lapshlop was hog-bitten! And Jake thought the online application form would be easier! That bytehog!

Etymology: From byte (a unit of memory on a computer) and hog - a being that hoards or monopolizes, in this case, one's computer memory/computer bytes.

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COMMENTS:

Clever! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 21:54:00

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Executabledysfunction

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: ecks-uh-cute-abuhl-dis-FUNCT-shun

Sentence: Heinrich cursed his aging laptop when it experience severe executabledysfuntion when he tried to download and install a system update of utmost importance.

Etymology: Blend of executable and dysfunction, a play on the term 'erectile dysfunction'

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Hahahaahah...Heinrich! das ist GUT! - metrohumanx, 2009-02-23: 00:55:00

Killer creation! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 10:49:00

Hee! Hee! - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 18:55:00

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Arthridical

Created by: letty

Pronunciation:

Sentence: You have an arthridical patient.

Etymology:

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-02-23: 00:01:01
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-09-06: 00:31:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James