Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".
Verboticisms
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Vistahault
Created by: coachcorrie26
Pronunciation: Vista (windows operating system) hault (to stop)
Sentence: Please do not update my laptop online with all that lollygagging nonsense because it can cause a "vistahault" and crash my entire system!
Etymology: vista (meaning beautiful/wonderful view - my beautiful/wonderful computer's view through the monitor via hard-drive) will hault (stop) running and crash my entire system!
Connixion
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: kon iks eon
Sentence: Although she had been advised to do so, Marianne was reluctant to install another connixion to slow down her computer.
Etymology: Connexion ( the process of bringing ideas or events together in memory or imagination) & Nix (nothing;a quantity of no importance)
Executabledysfunction
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: ecks-uh-cute-abuhl-dis-FUNCT-shun
Sentence: Brad cursed his aging laptop when it experience severe executabledysfuntion when he tried to download and install a system update of utmost importance.
Etymology: Blend of 'executable' (An executable file is a file that is used to perform various functions or operations on a computer) and 'dysfunction' (when something doesn't operate normally), a play on the term 'erectile dysfunction'
Desktopdysfunction
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: desk top dis funk shun
Sentence: You know the embarrassment, the guilt, the feelings of inadequacy, the viagravvation. Yes, we've all seen the commercials to go to your doctor. But where does your computer go when it suffers from desktopdysfunction? There's no self help groups, no printed literature. All it can do is surf the net and hope for an antidote to the new patch you've installed. The one which was supposed to increase memory and speed, but which instead creates internet impotence. Maybe somewhere there's a cure, but until there's a celebrity spokesperson or a telethon to raise funds and awareness, what's a lowly desktop to do? It's hard-breaking...
Etymology: Desktop ((computer science) the area of the screen in graphical user interfaces against which icons and windows appear) & Dysfunction ((medicine) any disturbance in the function of an organ or body part). Play on erectile dysfunction (impotence resulting from a man's inability to have or maintain an erection)
Dualsnore
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: doōəlsnôr
Sentence: Ryan is diligent about winstalling every patch and wupgrade that comes along. The latest one turned his fancy dualcore processor into a dualsnore. He can't understand how his bestest-friends-ever at Windows could have let him down. Surely they couldn't have made a mistake. He decides that he must have done something wrong in downloading or winstalling the patch to the patch so he'll wait patiently for the patch to the patch to the patch.
Etymology: dual core (A multi-core processor) + snore (a snorting or grunting sound in a person's breathing while asleep)(a thing that is extremely boring)
Upstall
Created by: QuantumMechanic
Pronunciation: up-stall
Sentence: I just upstalled that emergency patch, and it slowed to a crawl, before throwing an out of memory error and rebooting.
Etymology: Upgrade (load a new version) + stall (slow down or stop)
Webstuck
Created by: silveryaspen
Pronunciation: web stuk
Sentence: It takes so long for some embedded files, they should call them inbedded files, for they take all night! ET hated spyware, and wished they made spryware, a program for nimble and quick downloads. ET didn't call it a web stack, he called it a webstuck! While waiting for his software on demand to download, ET not only had time to phone home, but every one on his home planet!
Etymology: WEBSTUCK is a play on WEB STACK, Web stack is the term used to refer to software stacks in Web development environments. The stack of software, mainly comprised of open source software, will contain an operating system, Web server, database server, and programming language. One of the most most well-known web stacks is LAMP. Let us hope it will enlighten our way!
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COMMENTS:
very apt - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-23: 15:52:00
Like it - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 17:26:00
Beeee good! - Nosila, 2009-02-23: 21:48:00
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Upgrate
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: uhpgreyt
Sentence: When the start-up chime on your computer sounds more like fingernails on a chalkboard, it might be an indication that the the latest upgrate isn't operating in quite the way it was expected to.
Etymology: upgrade (to incorporate new or more accurate information) + grate (to scrape or rub with rough or noisy friction)
Blindupdate
Created by: feltcap
Pronunciation: blīndŭp-dāt'
Sentence: Similar to that uneasy feeling you get when one of your friends sets you up he was nervous going into the blindupdate. He was worried that it would result in the same kind of feeling he had on his last blind date - will it ever end!?
Etymology: blind date - a social engagement between two persons who have not previously met, update - the act of instance of bringing something up to date
Freezamavista
Created by: kateinkorea
Pronunciation: FREE zah mah VEES tah
Sentence: June came in and found me working on her computer trying to give her the office upgrades. The next thing she's saying "Hasta la vista, Baby. Back away from my computer. You are not going to freezamavista." "Hasta la vista to you too June. And I won't be back," I told her.
Etymology: FREEZE: as in computer freeze MY: VISTA: operating system PLAY ON HASTA LA VISTA: see you later in Spanish
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James