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'I don't let my laptop date!'

DEFINITION: v. A software update or patch which uses up a ton of memory and hard drive space, stalling the computer with a crippling case of performance anxiety. n. To stall out a computer by installing a software "upgrade".

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Verboticisms

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Upgreyed

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: uhp grayd

Sentence: she started the upgrade five hours and the screen was still upgreyed.

Etymology: upgrade greyed

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Pleasewaiteternity

GlobalGallery

Created by: GlobalGallery

Pronunciation: pleez-wayt-urn-itee

Sentence: "That site has everything" proclaimed Charles, "All the coolest games, movies, and TV shows, and it's all free". William sat there staring eagerly at the screen. He was just moments away from accessing a treasure trove of quality content. Those moments became minutes and the loading bar kept restarting. William was facing a pleasewaiternity when he realised that the promise was too good to be true and the site was a dud. Then his keyboard, mouse and screen all locked up in synchronized chaos.

Etymology: Loading please wait... + eternity (forever)

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Upstall

Created by: QuantumMechanic

Pronunciation: up-stall

Sentence: I just upstalled that emergency patch, and it slowed to a crawl, before throwing an out of memory error and rebooting.

Etymology: Upgrade (load a new version) + stall (slow down or stop)

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Sapgrade

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: sap/grade

Sentence: Everytime our IT guys install a sapgrade on our systems they create havoc for us and overtime for them - maybe it's some kind of conspiracy.

Etymology: upgrade + sap (meaning both - a foolish person and also to sap energy)

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COMMENTS:

nice jw - galwaywegian, 2009-02-23: 10:06:00

sapgrades as part of a compspiracy - brilliant sentence and verbotomy! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 11:28:00

Great word!! - TJayzz, 2009-02-23: 17:24:00

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Affordapatchee

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: aff ord a pat chee

Sentence: He had his reservations. After all, this new upgrade, while inexpensive (actually free) could cost him his whole computer system. It would affect his computer Manitouls, he'd be shaman his ancestors. It was definitely accessible and affordapatchee, but it tended to slow down his hard drive, took lots of memory and stalled out his access to the Home Shopping Network and his daily dose of Verbomtomy! No good could come from that...it would be Totem bedlam. Using his Inuituition and wearing his Bow Tie and his Arrow shirt,he decided that he would buy the patch anyway...if his system crashed, he could always Sioux the manufacturers!

Etymology: Fort Apache (John Ford movie, starring John Wayne as a commander at Fort Apache, who has sympathy for Cochese and his Native followers. He is replaced (upgraded as it were) by Henry Fonda, who is not so liberal and whose arrogance causes the Natives to uprise and give the Fort trouble...relationships have to be repaired) & Afford ( be the cause or source of;be able to spare or give up) & Patch (a short set of commands to correct a bug in a computer program;a connection intended to be used for a limited time)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Inuituition ....you crack me up, Hon! - metrohumanx, 2009-02-23: 00:53:00

love it! - galwaywegian, 2009-02-23: 07:00:00

superb injunuity! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 10:45:00

injunious.... - Mustang, 2009-02-23: 18:05:00

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Dualsnore

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: doōəlsnôr

Sentence: Ryan is diligent about winstalling every patch and wupgrade that comes along. The latest one turned his fancy dualcore processor into a dualsnore. He can't understand how his bestest-friends-ever at Windows could have let him down. Surely they couldn't have made a mistake. He decides that he must have done something wrong in downloading or winstalling the patch to the patch so he'll wait patiently for the patch to the patch to the patch.

Etymology: dual core (A multi-core processor) + snore (a snorting or grunting sound in a person's breathing while asleep)(a thing that is extremely boring)

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Busstop

Created by: otherguy

Pronunciation: bəsstäp

Sentence: The latest "gotta-install-it-or-your-computer-will-blow-up" patch to the patch to the patch turned out to be a complete busstop on my computer. (I'm writing this on a friend's laptop)

Etymology: bus: a distinct set of conductors carrying data and control signals within a computer system, to which pieces of equipment may be connected in parallel + stop: come to an end; cease to happen

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COMMENTS:

artr Ooh, sounds personal! - artr, 2009-02-23: 07:24:00

did busplug inspire you? - silveryaspen, 2009-02-23: 11:26:00

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Upstallation

BitCrack

Created by: BitCrack

Pronunciation: like installation, with up at the beginning.

Sentence: "watch out man, that Starcraft patch gave me some major upstallation"

Etymology:

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Adopeytablet

Created by: scrabbelicious

Pronunciation: Ah : dope : ee : tab : let

Sentence: It was no flash in the pan, Kernal Panic thought as he looked blankly at the draped screen on his new Adopeytablet. The last time this happened they told me it would be the last time this happened, so the Kernals recursion relationship with technology trundled on. I guess that's some kinda feedback loop or loop-the-loop.

Etymology: A : indefinite article : Dopey : drugged up or slow dwarf : Tablet : Pill, may be screened (6 letters). Pun on Adobe : A byword for nightmareish yet essential software, bring a tonne of RAM.

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Bugfixative

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: bug-fix-a-tiv

Sentence: Help Desk? Have you tried turning it off and on? Yes, but that last patch you pushed out has caused by beetle screensaver to become stuck and I can't do anything! Help! You'll have to go online and log a job to review the bugfixative, then we can address it. But, I can't do anything, not even go online to log a job.

Etymology: bug fix (patch) + fixative (glue, adhesive to hold everything firmly in place, makes things stick)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-02-23: 00:01:01
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-09-06: 00:31:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James