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'I guess I'll do a little window shopping...'

DEFINITION: v. What boyfriends and husbands do while they are waiting their girlfriends and/or wives to shop. n. A person doing such a thing.

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Verboticisms

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Shopitulate

Created by: eulogy

Pronunciation: shah-pit-you-late

Sentence: I can't go golfing.. I already promised the wife I'd go shopitulate at the mall with her this afternoon.

Etymology: Combination of "shop" and "capitulate" which is pretty much what happens. You know what I'm talking about.

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COMMENTS:

Nice one - cfinleyca, 2007-09-26: 17:38:00

Greater love has no man than that he give up his golf for his wife! Good word - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:49:00

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Mallancholy

Created by: Scrumpy

Pronunciation: mahl-uhn-kuhl-eee

Sentence: Dave went mallancholy as he stood holding Debra's handbag at the Emasculation Station outlet store.

Etymology: mall + melancholy

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COMMENTS:

funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 11:50:00

Seems as if Dave got himself into a eunuch predickament. Might decide to keep the handbag! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 22:19:00

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Slowmad

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: SLO-mad

Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.

Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00

metrohumanx Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad. http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00

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Gapetient

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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Masterwait

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: mas/ter/weyt

Sentence: To keep her happy, he goes along shopping and masterwaits patiently for her while she tries on every pair of shoes in the store.

Etymology: MASTERWAIT - verb - from MASTER (a person who commands, or is in charge and of course SHE is) + WAIT (to be patient and remain neglected for a time)

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COMMENTS:

that's why guys wear such bulky overcoats - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:04:00

He thinks it's the best way to achieve "masterpeace" - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:49:00

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Spousearrest

Created by: marglark

Pronunciation: spowse + arreste

Sentence: he was sentenced to spouse arrest after his wife left. He couldn't go too far anywhere and there wasn't much he could do.

Etymology: spouse + house arrest

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Mallbearer

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: pawl-BAIR-uhr

Sentence: Bob confessed to friends that he would rather go to a funeral than be a mallbearer on one of Roxie's shopping trips.

Etymology: Blend of MALL: (as in shopping mall)mercantile establishment consisting of a carefully landscaped complex of shops representing leading merchandisers; & PALLBEARER: One of those who attend the coffin at a funeral; so called from the pall being formerly carried by them; PALL: lose interest or become bored with something or somebody; grim, gloomy, foreboding.

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COMMENTS:

excellent - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:04:00

Ah, death by debit, all sales final, slashed prices, coffin up more cash...Debt of a Salesman! - Nosila, 2008-08-28: 01:38:00

metrohumanx Bravo! More! More! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:35:00

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Parcelmoany

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: par/sell/moany

Sentence: Parcelmoany is a state of extreme vexation when one is loaded down with expensive items he can't afford.

Etymology: parcel + parsimony (extreme econmoy) + moan

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Parcelmoany is inspired. I'd like to read more about the affliction. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:08:00

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Mallschlump

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: mawl-shlump

Sentence: While most men might get fidgety when their wives browse thru the stores, Marty takes great delight in an opportunity to just mallschlump, wherein he'll cruise around from business to business checking out babes, window displays and oddball people.

Etymology: blend of words 'mall' (n. large retail complex containing a variety of stores and often restaurants ) and 'schlump' (v. to loaf or idle)

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Fleemarket

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: flea-mar-ket

Sentence: Kevin had a low tolerance for shopping with his girlfriend. Within 2 minutes of waiting for her to inspect the goods, he was toe tapping, within 5 minutes he was watch watching, by 10 minutes he was fleemarketing.

Etymology: flee (depart, leave, escape from) + market (shop) + fleamarket (a type of market that one can spend hours picking over bargains)

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COMMENTS:

good one! - remistram, 2007-09-26: 09:33:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-26: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie! ~ James

metrohumanx metrohumanx - 2008-08-27: 00:50:00
Can't you be arrested for MASTERWAITING in public?

galwaywegian - 2008-08-27: 05:56:00
Or masterbaiting at college

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-08: 00:16:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie. ~ James