Verboticisms

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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Created by: SethelMerman

Pronunciation: An-tiss-uh-pray-shun

Sentence: Thinking of his credit card bill and the countless bags from Macy's, passed the time during his anticappraision.

Etymology: From (anticipation: in waiting) + (appraise: judge value)

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: VAY-pih-DRIFT

Sentence: Lawrence could not bring himself to follow his wife into the Aromabody Boutique, even to dampen her urge to spend,spend, spend. Instead , he chose voluntary exile to the mallhall, where he would VAPIDRIFT with the herd of patient husbandry, a hundred-meter stare in his glazed eyes. Teen girls, ancient immigrants and momshoppers piloting triple tandem strollers jockeyed around him as he waited for the prized seat on a hard plastic bench. Time stretched to infinity as other VAPIDRIFTERS milled around in their assigned areas - no more than ten steps from the entrance, but not too close to the semi-erotic manneqins in the windows of BarnDress Woman discount plus-size fashion emporium. There would be no mercy for the man who wandered away. Lawrence checked his watch for the umpteenth time, resigned to his fate as a docile consumer support unit.

Etymology: VAPId+DRIFT=VAPIDRIFT.....Vapid: lacking liveliness, tang, briskness, or force- Latin vapidus flat-tasting; akin to Latin vappa flat wine and perhaps to Latin vapor steam......DRIFT:something driven, propelled, or urged along or drawn together in a clump by or as if by a natural agency- Middle English; akin to Old English drīfan to drive.

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COMMENTS:

We regret the passing of Laurence Urdang. 1927-2008 - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:49:00

how tragic - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:03:00

Another great word and real-life story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:59:00

Some day, lad...all this will be yours. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:37:00

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Created by: frenchprof

Pronunciation: as it sounds

Sentence: Charlie wasterbated aimlessly once again as Sandra was trying on her pink platforms.

Etymology: waste-akin to waiting and middle English bate to take away; subtract.

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Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: chik-pik

Sentence: While Sue was in the dressing room, Bob bided his time with a chickpick session. The first object of his scrutiny was slightly plump, but had nice hair. The second had a nice body, but egad, that eye brow ring had to go! The third had it all going for her, except for the fact that she talked through her nose. The fourth...

Etymology: nit pick, chick

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COMMENTS:

a chick picnic - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:45:00

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Created by: Pseudonym

Pronunciation: pur-chai-ay-tuss

Sentence: "Sorry, I can't meet you at the bar right now, I'm on a purchiatus."

Etymology: purchase + hiatus

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: boy kot

Sentence: When she took her boyfriend shopping, which he hated, he hung around outside the building as a boycaught. He really should have gone into the store, as she was getting final fitting for her wedding dress...

Etymology: Boy (Man or young male) & Caught (the act of catching something)...wordplay on boycott (to ignore;a group's refusal to have commercial dealings with some organization in protest against its policies)

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Created by: astorey

Pronunciation: lye-a-round

Sentence: Tom didn't know why Mindy was so eager for his validation when she was buying clothes, but he had long since become accustomed to his role...he needed to liearound the dressing room, saying encouraging--though not completely honest-- things things like "No you're butt doesn't look fat" or "I don't think that black dress looks too much like your other black dress."

Etymology: lie in two senses--to not tell the truth and to lounge; around in the sense of either prevaricating or lounging in proximity to the shopping.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: man tis ip ayt

Sentence: When Sergio went to the Big Mall with his fiancee, Carmela, to find her a great outfit, he knew it would take all day. He was able to manticipate by doing guy things at the shopping haven...drink expresso, check out the games store, watch a game on the big screen and buy lottery tickets. It was worth it when his princess came out with clothes and accessories to die for, even if it left him lighter in the wallet...

Etymology: Man (adult male) & Anticipate (wishing with confidence of fulfillment;wait with expectation)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bih-truhj

Sentence: When Jill wants to go shopping she likes to take Tom with her. She'll bounce from store to store like a lioness on a hunt. He'll betrudge along behind her like a trailer with flat tires. They've been together long enough that he knows when to nod and when to grunt something like "That look great on you".

Etymology: begrudge (to be reluctant to give, grant, or allow) + trudge (to walk, especially laboriously or wearily)

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