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'I guess I'll do a little window shopping...'

DEFINITION: v. What boyfriends and husbands do while they are waiting their girlfriends and/or wives to shop. n. A person doing such a thing.

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Vapidrift

metrohumanx

Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: VAY-pih-DRIFT

Sentence: Lawrence could not bring himself to follow his wife into the Aromabody Boutique, even to dampen her urge to spend,spend, spend. Instead , he chose voluntary exile to the mallhall, where he would VAPIDRIFT with the herd of patient husbandry, a hundred-meter stare in his glazed eyes. Teen girls, ancient immigrants and momshoppers piloting triple tandem strollers jockeyed around him as he waited for the prized seat on a hard plastic bench. Time stretched to infinity as other VAPIDRIFTERS milled around in their assigned areas - no more than ten steps from the entrance, but not too close to the semi-erotic manneqins in the windows of BarnDress Woman discount plus-size fashion emporium. There would be no mercy for the man who wandered away. Lawrence checked his watch for the umpteenth time, resigned to his fate as a docile consumer support unit.

Etymology: VAPId+DRIFT=VAPIDRIFT.....Vapid: lacking liveliness, tang, briskness, or force- Latin vapidus flat-tasting; akin to Latin vappa flat wine and perhaps to Latin vapor steam......DRIFT:something driven, propelled, or urged along or drawn together in a clump by or as if by a natural agency- Middle English; akin to Old English drīfan to drive.

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx We regret the passing of Laurence Urdang. 1927-2008 - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:49:00

how tragic - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:03:00

Another great word and real-life story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:59:00

metrohumanx Some day, lad...all this will be yours. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:37:00

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Contemplaza

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: con/tem/pla/za

Sentence: While dutifully lugging bags around like a pack mule, Chris would quietly contemplaza the meaning of life.

Etymology: contemplate + plaza

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COMMENTS:

aplaz (clapclapclap) - galwaywegian, 2007-09-26: 07:21:00

Perhaps Chris should comtemplaza this that: some women become nags because their husbands behave like mules! Good word:looks nice, sounds nice. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 19:01:00

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Spreeander

Created by: ScrabbledEgg

Pronunciation: spree-an-durr

Sentence: Spreeandering about the mall for hours while Sandy tried on countless pairs of jeans left Jack barely coherent, and hungry. When he saw his honey finally emerge from her umpteenth dressing room, he grunted something about "done yet" and "food court" - much to her annoyance. "Geez, Jack, don't be such a Spreeanderthal" she retailiated (retail + retaliate), handing him the most expensive pair she had found.

Etymology: (shopping) spree + meander

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COMMENTS:

petaj Is that when he went off in perch haste? - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:47:00

At the end of a shopping spree a woman is tired as well as spent. Nice blend. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:47:00

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Spousearrest

Created by: marglark

Pronunciation: spowse + arreste

Sentence: he was sentenced to spouse arrest after his wife left. He couldn't go too far anywhere and there wasn't much he could do.

Etymology: spouse + house arrest

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Cashtrate

DrWebsterIII

Created by: DrWebsterIII

Pronunciation: ˈkash trāt

Sentence: Leonard always felt cashtrated at the mall whilst his girlfriend Amanda took charge of his credit card and tossed him like a hangar in the dressing home

Etymology: cash ( currency, money) + castrate (to emasculate, deprive vigor)

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COMMENTS:

That's why they call money geld! - Nosila, 2012-11-02: 19:27:00

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Guybrowse

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gye browz

Sentence: Most men hate shopping and even worse hate waiting while someone they are with shops. Mark was no exception and when his wife Lana dragged him to the store to wait for her to try on some new fashions, he took that waiting opportunity to guybrowse in other departments. When Lana finished shopping in a department store, armed with lots of bags and boxes, she then would waste half an hour looking for Mark. Invariably she'd find him sampling free food; catching up on the latest thought-provoking articles in Playboy Magazine; watching a big screen TV football game or trying out the latest Lazyboy recliner. She often wished that the stores would smarten up and copy an idea of Harrod's. They had a lounge area similar to a gentleman's club, with comfy wingback chairs set in a room with television and newspapers, serving cold ale to waiting guybrows. It was like a nursery for men.

Etymology: Guy (male;an informal term for a youth or man) & Browse (look around casually and randomly, without seeking anything in particular;shop around; not necessarily buying) & rhyming with: Eyebrows (the arch of hair above each eye...when raised it acts as an unspoken question (Are you really buying that?)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx You never let us down, Nosila. Mark had a lot of nerve- I would NEVER break with protocol and drft away from the store entrance... - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:58:00

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:05:00

How true. It takes years of practice to become a champion guybrowser. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:53:00

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Gaptive

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: gap/tiv

Sentence: He wanted to be at home watching the game but instead he was held gaptive at the Gap outlet

Etymology: gap + captive

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Manterval

Created by: Rhyme79

Pronunciation: mann-tuh-vawl

Sentence: Gideon had grown used to waiting outside of the changing rooms in women's shops. In fact he had learnt to almost enjoy mantervals and began to use the time more productively. Instead of spending hours on end waiting by racks of frocks staring at his shoes like he used to, he now uses being surrounded by women to his benefit. Gideon has picked up some of the most amazing make-up tips, he's learnt how to deal with period pain and can now tell the difference between shampoo and shower gel which he, like most men, previously believed were inter-changeable. The list goes on...

Etymology: Man (male adult human) + interval ( intervening period of time)

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Shoperfunctorate

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: shop-pur-FUNKSHO-rate

Sentence: Bob is not an optimist, he never double parks while Roxie is shopping. All he hopes for, as he shoperfunctorates, is that Roxie's feet will start to hurt before his wallet does. And when she's seriously shoprocrasty, he never ridicules her or becomes boutique-piqued, but remains mart-smart even when she tries on a dozen dresses and an imelda of shoes.

Etymology: Blend of shop & perfunctorate: done merely to get rid of the duty, performed mechanically, by rote, superficially. Cognates: Shoperfunctory, Shoperfunctoriness.

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COMMENTS:

I love boutique-piqued and the imelda of shoes - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:46:00

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Manopause

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: man - oh - pause

Sentence: Fred was going through manopause today. He started to sweat, have hot flashes and get overemotional as he waited in the sun for 3 hours while Margaret tried on dresses.

Etymology: menopause (a change of life time period where women have many intersting symptoms) + man (a different kind of manopause)..... + pause (to stop or wait)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-26: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie! ~ James

metrohumanx metrohumanx - 2008-08-27: 00:50:00
Can't you be arrested for MASTERWAITING in public?

galwaywegian - 2008-08-27: 05:56:00
Or masterbaiting at college

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-08: 00:16:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie. ~ James