Verboticisms

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: mas/ter/weyt

Sentence: To keep her happy, he goes along shopping and will masterwait patiently while she tries on every pair of shoes in the store.

Etymology: master (of course she is this) + wait

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COMMENTS:

Oh geez, I just now "got it"! Funny! - purpleartichokes, 2007-09-26: 11:55:00

Ah you beat me to it!! >:) Voting now. - joelb, 2007-09-26: 21:55:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: shop-pur-FUNKSHO-rate

Sentence: Bob is not an optimist, he never double parks while Roxie is shopping. All he hopes for, as he shoperfunctorates, is that Roxie's feet will start to hurt before his wallet does. And when she's seriously shoprocrasty, he never ridicules her or becomes boutique-piqued, but remains mart-smart even when she tries on a dozen dresses and an imelda of shoes.

Etymology: Blend of shop & perfunctorate: done merely to get rid of the duty, performed mechanically, by rote, superficially. Cognates: Shoperfunctory, Shoperfunctoriness.

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COMMENTS:

I love boutique-piqued and the imelda of shoes - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:46:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: SLO-mad

Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.

Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)

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COMMENTS:

RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00

Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad. http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gye browz

Sentence: Most men hate shopping and even worse hate waiting while someone they are with shops. Mark was no exception and when his wife Lana dragged him to the store to wait for her to try on some new fashions, he took that waiting opportunity to guybrowse in other departments. When Lana finished shopping in a department store, armed with lots of bags and boxes, she then would waste half an hour looking for Mark. Invariably she'd find him sampling free food; catching up on the latest thought-provoking articles in Playboy Magazine; watching a big screen TV football game or trying out the latest Lazyboy recliner. She often wished that the stores would smarten up and copy an idea of Harrod's. They had a lounge area similar to a gentleman's club, with comfy wingback chairs set in a room with television and newspapers, serving cold ale to waiting guybrows. It was like a nursery for men.

Etymology: Guy (male;an informal term for a youth or man) & Browse (look around casually and randomly, without seeking anything in particular;shop around; not necessarily buying) & rhyming with: Eyebrows (the arch of hair above each eye...when raised it acts as an unspoken question (Are you really buying that?)

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COMMENTS:

You never let us down, Nosila. Mark had a lot of nerve- I would NEVER break with protocol and drft away from the store entrance... - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:58:00

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:05:00

How true. It takes years of practice to become a champion guybrowser. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:53:00

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Created by: Magic94

Pronunciation: L-oi-ling

Sentence: Geoff had to stand and leul whilst Jane looked through Marks and Spencers.

Etymology:

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Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: chik-pik

Sentence: While Sue was in the dressing room, Bob bided his time with a chickpick session. The first object of his scrutiny was slightly plump, but had nice hair. The second had a nice body, but egad, that eye brow ring had to go! The third had it all going for her, except for the fact that she talked through her nose. The fourth...

Etymology: nit pick, chick

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COMMENTS:

a chick picnic - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:45:00

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: man - oh - pause

Sentence: Fred was going through manopause today. He started to sweat, have hot flashes and get overemotional as he waited in the sun for 3 hours while Margaret tried on dresses.

Etymology: menopause (a change of life time period where women have many intersting symptoms) + man (a different kind of manopause)..... + pause (to stop or wait)

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: con/tem/pla/za

Sentence: While dutifully lugging bags around the mall like a pack mule, Chris would quietly contemplaza the meaning of life.

Etymology: contemplate + plaza

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COMMENTS:

Has he discovered what it is? If so, please let me know. Good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:55:00

Always look on the BRIGHT side of lfe. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 01:29:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: boy kot

Sentence: When she took her boyfriend shopping, which he hated, he hung around outside the building as a boycaught. He really should have gone into the store, as she was getting final fitting for her wedding dress...

Etymology: Boy (Man or young male) & Caught (the act of catching something)...wordplay on boycott (to ignore;a group's refusal to have commercial dealings with some organization in protest against its policies)

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Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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