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'I guess I'll do a little window shopping...'

DEFINITION: v. What boyfriends and husbands do while they are waiting their girlfriends and/or wives to shop. n. A person doing such a thing.

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Verboticisms

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Gapetient

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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Manopause

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: man - oh - pause

Sentence: Fred was going through manopause today. He started to sweat, have hot flashes and get overemotional as he waited in the sun for 3 hours while Margaret tried on dresses.

Etymology: menopause (a change of life time period where women have many intersting symptoms) + man (a different kind of manopause)..... + pause (to stop or wait)

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Shoperone

Created by: lumina

Pronunciation: shop/er/one

Sentence: Eugene was so disappointed in himself. He should have known it was too good to be true. When Tiffany said, "Pick me up at 6:00 big boy, and we'll paint the town" he had no idea she just needed a ride to the mall, and a shoperone to carry her bags. You could almost see the neon sign blinking "Fool" on his forehead.

Etymology: derived from chaperone: One who accompanies and supervises

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx I have seen the glare of that neon sign all too often- reflected in a shoppe window. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:51:00

great word - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:06:00

very good. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:56:00

Love it! - Nosila, 2008-08-28: 01:35:00

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Gaptive

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: gap/tiv

Sentence: He wanted to be at home watching the game but instead he was held gaptive at the Gap outlet

Etymology: gap + captive

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Mallinger

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: mawl-ing-gerr

Sentence: he was simply expected to mallinger while she disappeared into an endless stream of shops

Etymology: mall, linger, malinger

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Good word.I sympathize. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 01:26:00

Like it - TJayzz, 2008-08-27: 03:44:00

very good - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:08:00

Nice word - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:43:00

Excellent! - Mustang, 2008-08-28: 01:54:00

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Mandroid

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: mandroid

Sentence: Whenever Cindy goes shopping, her boyfriend becomes her mandroid. He becomes a purse-holding, head-nodding, cart-pushing robot. He will spout pre-determined phrases like ”that looks great on you” or ”no, that’s not too much to spend if you really like it”.

Etymology: man (an adult human male) + android (a robot with a human appearance)

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Guybrowse

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gye browz

Sentence: Most men hate shopping and even worse hate waiting while someone they are with shops. Mark was no exception and when his wife Lana dragged him to the store to wait for her to try on some new fashions, he took that waiting opportunity to guybrowse in other departments. When Lana finished shopping in a department store, armed with lots of bags and boxes, she then would waste half an hour looking for Mark. Invariably she'd find him sampling free food; catching up on the latest thought-provoking articles in Playboy Magazine; watching a big screen TV football game or trying out the latest Lazyboy recliner. She often wished that the stores would smarten up and copy an idea of Harrod's. They had a lounge area similar to a gentleman's club, with comfy wingback chairs set in a room with television and newspapers, serving cold ale to waiting guybrows. It was like a nursery for men.

Etymology: Guy (male;an informal term for a youth or man) & Browse (look around casually and randomly, without seeking anything in particular;shop around; not necessarily buying) & rhyming with: Eyebrows (the arch of hair above each eye...when raised it acts as an unspoken question (Are you really buying that?)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx You never let us down, Nosila. Mark had a lot of nerve- I would NEVER break with protocol and drft away from the store entrance... - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:58:00

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:05:00

How true. It takes years of practice to become a champion guybrowser. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:53:00

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Contemplaza

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: con/tem/pla/za

Sentence: While dutifully lugging bags around like a pack mule, Chris would quietly contemplaza the meaning of life.

Etymology: contemplate + plaza

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COMMENTS:

aplaz (clapclapclap) - galwaywegian, 2007-09-26: 07:21:00

Perhaps Chris should comtemplaza this that: some women become nags because their husbands behave like mules! Good word:looks nice, sounds nice. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 19:01:00

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Waitwatching

Created by: hgofom

Pronunciation: Just like it looks.

Sentence: My wife went into the mall and I was left waitwatching.

Etymology: While waiting, we wait, and we watch. There are also several puns and entendres in the word. One is a play on the diet popular with many women. Another is that while we wait we're not only people watching, but frequently looking at our watches. Also, waitwatch, waitwatcher, etc.

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Slowmad

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: SLO-mad

Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.

Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00

metrohumanx Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad. http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-26: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie! ~ James

metrohumanx metrohumanx - 2008-08-27: 00:50:00
Can't you be arrested for MASTERWAITING in public?

galwaywegian - 2008-08-27: 05:56:00
Or masterbaiting at college

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-08: 00:16:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie. ~ James