Verboticisms

Created by: marglark

Pronunciation: spowse + arreste

Sentence: he was sentenced to spouse arrest after his wife left. He couldn't go too far anywhere and there wasn't much he could do.

Etymology: spouse + house arrest

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Created by: astorey

Pronunciation: lye-a-round

Sentence: Tom didn't know why Mindy was so eager for his validation when she was buying clothes, but he had long since become accustomed to his role...he needed to liearound the dressing room, saying encouraging--though not completely honest-- things things like "No you're butt doesn't look fat" or "I don't think that black dress looks too much like your other black dress."

Etymology: lie in two senses--to not tell the truth and to lounge; around in the sense of either prevaricating or lounging in proximity to the shopping.

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Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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Created by: Rhyme79

Pronunciation: mann-tuh-vawl

Sentence: Gideon had grown used to waiting outside of the changing rooms in women's shops. In fact he had learnt to almost enjoy mantervals and began to use the time more productively. Instead of spending hours on end waiting by racks of frocks staring at his shoes like he used to, he now uses being surrounded by women to his benefit. Gideon has picked up some of the most amazing make-up tips, he's learnt how to deal with period pain and can now tell the difference between shampoo and shower gel which he, like most men, previously believed were inter-changeable. The list goes on...

Etymology: Man (male adult human) + interval ( intervening period of time)

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Created by: ScrabbledEgg

Pronunciation: spree-an-durr

Sentence: Spreeandering about the mall for hours while Sandy tried on countless pairs of jeans left Jack barely coherent, and hungry. When he saw his honey finally emerge from her umpteenth dressing room, he grunted something about "done yet" and "food court" - much to her annoyance. "Geez, Jack, don't be such a Spreeanderthal" she retailiated (retail + retaliate), handing him the most expensive pair she had found.

Etymology: (shopping) spree + meander

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COMMENTS:

Is that when he went off in perch haste? - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:47:00

At the end of a shopping spree a woman is tired as well as spent. Nice blend. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:47:00

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Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: guy-browz

Sentence: every time his wife took clothes into the change rooms he would wander awkwardly around the store, trying to guybrowse without drawing attention to himself

Etymology: guy, browse, eyebrows

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: mawl-shlump

Sentence: While most men might get fidgety when their wives browse thru the stores, Marty takes great delight in an opportunity to just mallschlump, wherein he'll cruise around from business to business checking out babes, window displays and oddball people.

Etymology: blend of words 'mall' (n. large retail complex containing a variety of stores and often restaurants ) and 'schlump' (v. to loaf or idle)

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: flea-mar-ket

Sentence: Kevin had a low tolerance for shopping with his girlfriend. Within 2 minutes of waiting for her to inspect the goods, he was toe tapping, within 5 minutes he was watch watching, by 10 minutes he was fleemarketing.

Etymology: flee (depart, leave, escape from) + market (shop) + fleamarket (a type of market that one can spend hours picking over bargains)

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COMMENTS:

good one! - remistram, 2007-09-26: 09:33:00

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Created by: BSqueeze4

Pronunciation: Clothes-soo-all-tee

Sentence: After seeing the man sitting outside the dressing room with eight shirts in his hands, I knew he was a total clothesualty.

Etymology: Clothes+casualty

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Created by: dessessopsid

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Greg became a windower everytime he went shopping with Janine.

Etymology: Window: the display space in and directly behind a shop window. And Widower: a man who has lost his wife by death and has not remarried.

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