Vote for the best verboticism.

'I guess I'll do a little window shopping...'

DEFINITION: v. What boyfriends and husbands do while they are waiting their girlfriends and/or wives to shop. n. A person doing such a thing.

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Verboticisms

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Mandroid

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: mandroid

Sentence: Whenever Cindy goes shopping, her boyfriend becomes her mandroid. He becomes a purse-holding, head-nodding, cart-pushing robot. He will spout pre-determined phrases like ”that looks great on you” or ”no, that’s not too much to spend if you really like it”.

Etymology: man (an adult human male) + android (a robot with a human appearance)

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Gapetient

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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Boutiquegate

Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /buˈtikˌge(ɪ)t/

Sentence: We who are stuck boutiquegating our significant others are very thankful to those few store designers who thought to provide comfortable seating just outside the dressing rooms.

Etymology: from boutique + tailgate

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Mallinger

Created by: kabloozie

Pronunciation: Mahl-LING-er

Sentence: Two hours after the Wife entered Old Navy, Bob was seen in the food court, mallingering on the cement bench with an empty bag of Cinnabons.

Etymology: Mall: a large retail complex with no hardware stores. Linger: to pass time in a tedious manner.

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COMMENTS:

wow. my first verboticism....sniff. - kabloozie, 2007-09-26: 02:26:00

petaj It's a good one too. No auto parts stores in a Mall either. - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:44:00

good start! - galwaywegian, 2007-09-26: 07:22:00

wow - what a debut!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:42:00

Perhaps Bob should have lingered in lingerie boutique. Might not have been so teduous for him ! Good start:good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:44:00

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Slowmad

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: SLO-mad

Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.

Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)

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COMMENTS:

metrohumanx RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00

metrohumanx Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad. http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00

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Nonnonaye

Created by: wordslikevenom

Pronunciation: Non-non-eye

Sentence: Dave stood by the shop's front entrance and watched mournfully as his missus sailed past the lingerie section onto the comfy cardy department. Turning to face the street, his inner Hefner began selecting new recruits for his imaginary bunny girl club, nonnonaying each young lass as she passed by. "Non ... non ... aye"

Etymology: Non - No (French). Aye - Yes (English; dialect North of the Watford Gap)

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Betrudge

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bih-truhj

Sentence: When Jill wants to go shopping she likes to take Tom with her. She'll bounce from store to store like a lioness on a hunt. He'll betrudge along behind her like a trailer with flat tires. They've been together long enough that he knows when to nod and when to grunt something like "That look great on you".

Etymology: begrudge (to be reluctant to give, grant, or allow) + trudge (to walk, especially laboriously or wearily)

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Browdle

Created by: legalalien

Pronunciation: BROW-dle

Sentence: Although Tiffany promised that it would only be a 3 minute ("I swear, you can time me!") detour into the Sephora store, Hank was left with nothing to do but browdle myriad products whose use he could not fathom.

Etymology: browse (look through or glance at casually) + dawdle (to waste time; idle; trifle; loiter)

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COMMENTS:

clever - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:08:00

Lovely word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 01:06:00

metrohumanx Like it! One can only sympathise with Hank. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:10:00

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Manterval

Created by: Rhyme79

Pronunciation: mann-tuh-vawl

Sentence: Gideon had grown used to waiting outside of the changing rooms in women's shops. In fact he had learnt to almost enjoy mantervals and began to use the time more productively. Instead of spending hours on end waiting by racks of frocks staring at his shoes like he used to, he now uses being surrounded by women to his benefit. Gideon has picked up some of the most amazing make-up tips, he's learnt how to deal with period pain and can now tell the difference between shampoo and shower gel which he, like most men, previously believed were inter-changeable. The list goes on...

Etymology: Man (male adult human) + interval ( intervening period of time)

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Clothesualty

Created by: BSqueeze4

Pronunciation: Clothes-soo-all-tee

Sentence: After seeing the man sitting outside the dressing room with eight shirts in his hands, I knew he was a total clothesualty.

Etymology: Clothes+casualty

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-26: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie! ~ James

metrohumanx metrohumanx - 2008-08-27: 00:50:00
Can't you be arrested for MASTERWAITING in public?

galwaywegian - 2008-08-27: 05:56:00
Or masterbaiting at college

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-08: 00:16:00
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie. ~ James