Verboticisms

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: SLO-mad

Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.

Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)

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COMMENTS:

RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00

Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad. http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00

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Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: guy-browz

Sentence: every time his wife took clothes into the change rooms he would wander awkwardly around the store, trying to guybrowse without drawing attention to himself

Etymology: guy, browse, eyebrows

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Created by: kathleen

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Created by: legalalien

Pronunciation: BROW-dle

Sentence: Although Tiffany promised that it would only be a 3 minute ("I swear, you can time me!") detour into the Sephora store, Hank was left with nothing to do but browdle myriad products whose use he could not fathom.

Etymology: browse (look through or glance at casually) + dawdle (to waste time; idle; trifle; loiter)

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COMMENTS:

clever - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:08:00

Lovely word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 01:06:00

Like it! One can only sympathise with Hank. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:10:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: gye browz

Sentence: Most men hate shopping and even worse hate waiting while someone they are with shops. Mark was no exception and when his wife Lana dragged him to the store to wait for her to try on some new fashions, he took that waiting opportunity to guybrowse in other departments. When Lana finished shopping in a department store, armed with lots of bags and boxes, she then would waste half an hour looking for Mark. Invariably she'd find him sampling free food; catching up on the latest thought-provoking articles in Playboy Magazine; watching a big screen TV football game or trying out the latest Lazyboy recliner. She often wished that the stores would smarten up and copy an idea of Harrod's. They had a lounge area similar to a gentleman's club, with comfy wingback chairs set in a room with television and newspapers, serving cold ale to waiting guybrows. It was like a nursery for men.

Etymology: Guy (male;an informal term for a youth or man) & Browse (look around casually and randomly, without seeking anything in particular;shop around; not necessarily buying) & rhyming with: Eyebrows (the arch of hair above each eye...when raised it acts as an unspoken question (Are you really buying that?)

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COMMENTS:

You never let us down, Nosila. Mark had a lot of nerve- I would NEVER break with protocol and drft away from the store entrance... - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:58:00

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:05:00

How true. It takes years of practice to become a champion guybrowser. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:53:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: mawl-shlump

Sentence: While most men might get fidgety when their wives browse thru the stores, Marty takes great delight in an opportunity to just mallschlump, wherein he'll cruise around from business to business checking out babes, window displays and oddball people.

Etymology: blend of words 'mall' (n. large retail complex containing a variety of stores and often restaurants ) and 'schlump' (v. to loaf or idle)

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Created by: ScrabbledEgg

Pronunciation: spree-an-durr

Sentence: Spreeandering about the mall for hours while Sandy tried on countless pairs of jeans left Jack barely coherent, and hungry. When he saw his honey finally emerge from her umpteenth dressing room, he grunted something about "done yet" and "food court" - much to her annoyance. "Geez, Jack, don't be such a Spreeanderthal" she retailiated (retail + retaliate), handing him the most expensive pair she had found.

Etymology: (shopping) spree + meander

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COMMENTS:

Is that when he went off in perch haste? - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:47:00

At the end of a shopping spree a woman is tired as well as spent. Nice blend. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:47:00

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: VAY-pih-DRIFT

Sentence: Lawrence could not bring himself to follow his wife into the Aromabody Boutique, even to dampen her urge to spend,spend, spend. Instead , he chose voluntary exile to the mallhall, where he would VAPIDRIFT with the herd of patient husbandry, a hundred-meter stare in his glazed eyes. Teen girls, ancient immigrants and momshoppers piloting triple tandem strollers jockeyed around him as he waited for the prized seat on a hard plastic bench. Time stretched to infinity as other VAPIDRIFTERS milled around in their assigned areas - no more than ten steps from the entrance, but not too close to the semi-erotic manneqins in the windows of BarnDress Woman discount plus-size fashion emporium. There would be no mercy for the man who wandered away. Lawrence checked his watch for the umpteenth time, resigned to his fate as a docile consumer support unit.

Etymology: VAPId+DRIFT=VAPIDRIFT.....Vapid: lacking liveliness, tang, briskness, or force- Latin vapidus flat-tasting; akin to Latin vappa flat wine and perhaps to Latin vapor steam......DRIFT:something driven, propelled, or urged along or drawn together in a clump by or as if by a natural agency- Middle English; akin to Old English drīfan to drive.

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COMMENTS:

We regret the passing of Laurence Urdang. 1927-2008 - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:49:00

how tragic - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:03:00

Another great word and real-life story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:59:00

Some day, lad...all this will be yours. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:37:00

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Pow-t-fit

Sentence: After trying on several different dresses, fourteen pairs of shoes and tried a number of handbags to see if they matched, Sarah had still not managed to settle for any of them. Frank had been waiting for two hours and was having a serious poutfit, he had promised his mates he would meet them down the pub and wanted to get there before they gave up on him and headed home. He was thinking of faking some sort of fit so that they get out of the place once and for all.

Etymology: Pout(to push one's lips forward as an expression of petulant annoyance) + Outfit(a set of clothes worn together) + Fit(a sudden attack of convulsions) = Poutfit

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COMMENTS:

Poor Frank ! He just has to learn a little patience. two hours is just considered a warm-up. Hahahah - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 01:21:00

so many funny words today - isn't there a store called Urban Poutfitters - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:07:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: shop-pur-FUNKSHO-rate

Sentence: Bob is not an optimist, he never double parks while Roxie is shopping. All he hopes for, as he shoperfunctorates, is that Roxie's feet will start to hurt before his wallet does. And when she's seriously shoprocrasty, he never ridicules her or becomes boutique-piqued, but remains mart-smart even when she tries on a dozen dresses and an imelda of shoes.

Etymology: Blend of shop & perfunctorate: done merely to get rid of the duty, performed mechanically, by rote, superficially. Cognates: Shoperfunctory, Shoperfunctoriness.

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COMMENTS:

I love boutique-piqued and the imelda of shoes - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:46:00

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