Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: v. What boyfriends and husbands do while they are waiting their girlfriends and/or wives to shop. n. A person doing such a thing.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Gapetient
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: gape.shunt
Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.
Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!
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COMMENTS:
Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00
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Mallancholy
Created by: Scrumpy
Pronunciation: mahl-uhn-kuhl-eee
Sentence: Dave went mallancholy as he stood holding Debra's handbag at the Emasculation Station outlet store.
Etymology: mall + melancholy
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COMMENTS:
funny - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 11:50:00
Seems as if Dave got himself into a eunuch predickament. Might decide to keep the handbag! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 22:19:00
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Shoperfunctorate
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: shop-pur-FUNKSHO-rate
Sentence: Bob is not an optimist, he never double parks while Roxie is shopping. All he hopes for, as he shoperfunctorates, is that Roxie's feet will start to hurt before his wallet does. And when she's seriously shoprocrasty, he never ridicules her or becomes boutique-piqued, but remains mart-smart even when she tries on a dozen dresses and an imelda of shoes.
Etymology: Blend of shop & perfunctorate: done merely to get rid of the duty, performed mechanically, by rote, superficially. Cognates: Shoperfunctory, Shoperfunctoriness.
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COMMENTS:
I love boutique-piqued and the imelda of shoes - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:46:00
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Betrudge
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: bih-truhj
Sentence: When Jill wants to go shopping she likes to take Tom with her. She'll bounce from store to store like a lioness on a hunt. He'll betrudge along behind her like a trailer with flat tires. They've been together long enough that he knows when to nod and when to grunt something like "That look great on you".
Etymology: begrudge (to be reluctant to give, grant, or allow) + trudge (to walk, especially laboriously or wearily)
Browdle
Created by: legalalien
Pronunciation: BROW-dle
Sentence: Although Tiffany promised that it would only be a 3 minute ("I swear, you can time me!") detour into the Sephora store, Hank was left with nothing to do but browdle myriad products whose use he could not fathom.
Etymology: browse (look through or glance at casually) + dawdle (to waste time; idle; trifle; loiter)
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COMMENTS:
clever - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:08:00
Lovely word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 01:06:00
Like it! One can only sympathise with Hank. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:10:00
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Windowschlump
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: win - doe - shlump
Sentence: Whenever Minnie would involve herself shopping she did so in a dedicated fashion that left Monty to manage for himself and he would always windowschlump, mindlessly wandrering from store to store looking at the displays.
Etymology: Blend of 'window' and 'schlump' (to loaf or idle)
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COMMENTS:
I've seen a clump of WINDOWSCHLUMPS, and shuffled right along. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:54:00
very descriptive - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:03:00
Ah, Metrohx: you better tell Monty where the store with the 'semi erotic mannequins' is situated. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 01:05:00
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Shopitulate
Created by: eulogy
Pronunciation: shah-pit-you-late
Sentence: I can't go golfing.. I already promised the wife I'd go shopitulate at the mall with her this afternoon.
Etymology: Combination of "shop" and "capitulate" which is pretty much what happens. You know what I'm talking about.
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COMMENTS:
Nice one - cfinleyca, 2007-09-26: 17:38:00
Greater love has no man than that he give up his golf for his wife! Good word - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:49:00
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Mandroid
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: mandroid
Sentence: Whenever Cindy goes shopping, her boyfriend becomes her mandroid. He becomes a purse-holding, head-nodding, cart-pushing robot. He will spout pre-determined phrases like ”that looks great on you” or ”no, that’s not too much to spend if you really like it”.
Etymology: man (an adult human male) + android (a robot with a human appearance)
Slowmad
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: SLO-mad
Sentence: As Tom wandered from store to store waiting for his wife to finish her shopping he became just one more slowmad, looking over each item as if he really cared, fending off sales clerks with the slowmad's mantra "Just looking". He also knew that this activity was slowly driving him stark-raving mad. He could feel his sanity slipping away with each step he took. The last thing he wanted to become was a husbutt-parker — those old men who take up every inch of available bench space vacantly staring into space while a mound of packages accumulates at their feet.
Etymology: Slow (Very not fast) + nomad (a desert wanderer)
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COMMENTS:
RIGHT ON! Great sentence, artr. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:03:00
Slowmad reminds me of Strongbad.
http://www.homestarrunner.com/sbemail.html - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:38:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie! ~ James
Can't you be arrested for MASTERWAITING in public?
galwaywegian - 2008-08-27: 05:56:00
Or masterbaiting at college
Today's definition was suggested by kabloozie. Thank you kabloozie. ~ James