Verboticisms

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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Created by: marglark

Pronunciation: spowse + arreste

Sentence: he was sentenced to spouse arrest after his wife left. He couldn't go too far anywhere and there wasn't much he could do.

Etymology: spouse + house arrest

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: mas/ter/weyt

Sentence: To keep her happy, he goes along shopping and masterwaits patiently for her while she tries on every pair of shoes in the store.

Etymology: MASTERWAIT - verb - from MASTER (a person who commands, or is in charge and of course SHE is) + WAIT (to be patient and remain neglected for a time)

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COMMENTS:

that's why guys wear such bulky overcoats - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:04:00

He thinks it's the best way to achieve "masterpeace" - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:49:00

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Created by: eulogy

Pronunciation: shah-pit-you-late

Sentence: I can't go golfing.. I already promised the wife I'd go shopitulate at the mall with her this afternoon.

Etymology: Combination of "shop" and "capitulate" which is pretty much what happens. You know what I'm talking about.

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COMMENTS:

Nice one - cfinleyca, 2007-09-26: 17:38:00

Greater love has no man than that he give up his golf for his wife! Good word - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:49:00

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: man - oh - pause

Sentence: Fred was going through manopause today. He started to sweat, have hot flashes and get overemotional as he waited in the sun for 3 hours while Margaret tried on dresses.

Etymology: menopause (a change of life time period where women have many intersting symptoms) + man (a different kind of manopause)..... + pause (to stop or wait)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: boy kot

Sentence: When she took her boyfriend shopping, which he hated, he hung around outside the building as a boycaught. He really should have gone into the store, as she was getting final fitting for her wedding dress...

Etymology: Boy (Man or young male) & Caught (the act of catching something)...wordplay on boycott (to ignore;a group's refusal to have commercial dealings with some organization in protest against its policies)

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Created by: astorey

Pronunciation: lye-a-round

Sentence: Tom didn't know why Mindy was so eager for his validation when she was buying clothes, but he had long since become accustomed to his role...he needed to liearound the dressing room, saying encouraging--though not completely honest-- things things like "No you're butt doesn't look fat" or "I don't think that black dress looks too much like your other black dress."

Etymology: lie in two senses--to not tell the truth and to lounge; around in the sense of either prevaricating or lounging in proximity to the shopping.

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: pawl-BAIR-uhr

Sentence: Bob confessed to friends that he would rather go to a funeral than be a mallbearer on one of Roxie's shopping trips.

Etymology: Blend of MALL: (as in shopping mall)mercantile establishment consisting of a carefully landscaped complex of shops representing leading merchandisers; & PALLBEARER: One of those who attend the coffin at a funeral; so called from the pall being formerly carried by them; PALL: lose interest or become bored with something or somebody; grim, gloomy, foreboding.

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COMMENTS:

excellent - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:04:00

Ah, death by debit, all sales final, slashed prices, coffin up more cash...Debt of a Salesman! - Nosila, 2008-08-28: 01:38:00

Bravo! More! More! - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:35:00

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Created by: kabloozie

Pronunciation: Mahl-LING-er

Sentence: Two hours after the Wife entered Old Navy, Bob was seen in the food court, mallingering on the cement bench with an empty bag of Cinnabons.

Etymology: Mall: a large retail complex with no hardware stores. Linger: to pass time in a tedious manner.

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COMMENTS:

wow. my first verboticism....sniff. - kabloozie, 2007-09-26: 02:26:00

It's a good one too. No auto parts stores in a Mall either. - petaj, 2007-09-26: 04:44:00

good start! - galwaywegian, 2007-09-26: 07:22:00

wow - what a debut!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:42:00

Perhaps Bob should have lingered in lingerie boutique. Might not have been so teduous for him ! Good start:good word. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-26: 18:44:00

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Created by: hgofom

Pronunciation: Just like it looks.

Sentence: My wife went into the mall and I was left waitwatching.

Etymology: While waiting, we wait, and we watch. There are also several puns and entendres in the word. One is a play on the diet popular with many women. Another is that while we wait we're not only people watching, but frequently looking at our watches. Also, waitwatch, waitwatcher, etc.

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