Verboticisms

Created by: frenchprof

Pronunciation: as it sounds

Sentence: Charlie wasterbated aimlessly once again as Sandra was trying on her pink platforms.

Etymology: waste-akin to waiting and middle English bate to take away; subtract.

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Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: gape.shunt

Sentence: Willard knew the routine as a practiced gapetient: wait outside the dressing rooms, holding the clothes his wife couldn't take in. After she had tried on all her selected items (several trips back and forth), pinched her cellulite while staring into the mirrors until she was bruised, she would appear and say there wasn't a thing she could use. Yes, he had suffered all these years with great gapetience. All this because he had thought she was the cutest car hop at Bob's Big Boy in Glendale in 1963.

Etymology: combination of gape, to stare with mouth open wide + patient, uncomplaining endurace or as well, a person undergoing treatment for disease!

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COMMENTS:

Beautiful writing...and hilarious.Thanks RW - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:29:00

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /buˈtikˌge(ɪ)t/

Sentence: We who are stuck boutiquegating our significant others are very thankful to those few store designers who thought to provide comfortable seating just outside the dressing rooms.

Etymology: from boutique + tailgate

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bih-truhj

Sentence: When Jill wants to go shopping she likes to take Tom with her. She'll bounce from store to store like a lioness on a hunt. He'll betrudge along behind her like a trailer with flat tires. They've been together long enough that he knows when to nod and when to grunt something like "That look great on you".

Etymology: begrudge (to be reluctant to give, grant, or allow) + trudge (to walk, especially laboriously or wearily)

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: funn dress sing

Sentence: I judged that the from the frost hardening on my spectacles that the hot redhead in the queue for the changing rooms was aware that she was being fundressed.

Etymology: undressing, fun

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COMMENTS:

I think I've fundrestimated all the weary shoppers - now I'm aware of the fundertones - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:40:00

that should be funderestimated - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-26: 10:41:00

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Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: gap/tiv

Sentence: He wanted to be at home watching the game but instead he was held gaptive at the Gap outlet

Etymology: gap + captive

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: VAY-pih-DRIFT

Sentence: Lawrence could not bring himself to follow his wife into the Aromabody Boutique, even to dampen her urge to spend,spend, spend. Instead , he chose voluntary exile to the mallhall, where he would VAPIDRIFT with the herd of patient husbandry, a hundred-meter stare in his glazed eyes. Teen girls, ancient immigrants and momshoppers piloting triple tandem strollers jockeyed around him as he waited for the prized seat on a hard plastic bench. Time stretched to infinity as other VAPIDRIFTERS milled around in their assigned areas - no more than ten steps from the entrance, but not too close to the semi-erotic manneqins in the windows of BarnDress Woman discount plus-size fashion emporium. There would be no mercy for the man who wandered away. Lawrence checked his watch for the umpteenth time, resigned to his fate as a docile consumer support unit.

Etymology: VAPId+DRIFT=VAPIDRIFT.....Vapid: lacking liveliness, tang, briskness, or force- Latin vapidus flat-tasting; akin to Latin vappa flat wine and perhaps to Latin vapor steam......DRIFT:something driven, propelled, or urged along or drawn together in a clump by or as if by a natural agency- Middle English; akin to Old English drīfan to drive.

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COMMENTS:

We regret the passing of Laurence Urdang. 1927-2008 - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 00:49:00

how tragic - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:03:00

Another great word and real-life story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 00:59:00

Some day, lad...all this will be yours. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:37:00

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Pow-t-fit

Sentence: After trying on several different dresses, fourteen pairs of shoes and tried a number of handbags to see if they matched, Sarah had still not managed to settle for any of them. Frank had been waiting for two hours and was having a serious poutfit, he had promised his mates he would meet them down the pub and wanted to get there before they gave up on him and headed home. He was thinking of faking some sort of fit so that they get out of the place once and for all.

Etymology: Pout(to push one's lips forward as an expression of petulant annoyance) + Outfit(a set of clothes worn together) + Fit(a sudden attack of convulsions) = Poutfit

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COMMENTS:

Poor Frank ! He just has to learn a little patience. two hours is just considered a warm-up. Hahahah - metrohumanx, 2008-08-27: 01:21:00

so many funny words today - isn't there a store called Urban Poutfitters - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:07:00

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: man - oh - pause

Sentence: Fred was going through manopause today. He started to sweat, have hot flashes and get overemotional as he waited in the sun for 3 hours while Margaret tried on dresses.

Etymology: menopause (a change of life time period where women have many intersting symptoms) + man (a different kind of manopause)..... + pause (to stop or wait)

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Created by: legalalien

Pronunciation: BROW-dle

Sentence: Although Tiffany promised that it would only be a 3 minute ("I swear, you can time me!") detour into the Sephora store, Hank was left with nothing to do but browdle myriad products whose use he could not fathom.

Etymology: browse (look through or glance at casually) + dawdle (to waste time; idle; trifle; loiter)

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COMMENTS:

clever - Jabberwocky, 2008-08-27: 16:08:00

Lovely word. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-28: 01:06:00

Like it! One can only sympathise with Hank. - metrohumanx, 2008-08-28: 03:10:00

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