DEFINITION: n. Embarrassing pet behavior; may be perfectly natural for the pet, but often makes humans feel self-conscious or ill at ease. v. To be embarrassed by your pet's beahviour

Droolofdenial

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: drool of de ny al

Sentence: When Jack Russell ran into Germaine Shepherd at the Greyhound Bus Depot, he had been walking his hound, Fido. Fido immediately jumped all over Germaine and slobbered all over her face. She shouted at Jack to Puli him off her. Jack tried valiantly but said, "Sorry, he's just friendly...he has so much love to give, like me! You are such a pretty Lassie!" Germaine unleashed her fury and demanded that Jack & Fido's adoration be harnassed. To calm Germaine, he invited her into the nearest pub, "The Dirty Dog" for a hair of the dog that bit her. She told the bartender, "I'll Havanese...no, make it a double!" Jack ordered a Scotch Terrier and soda. "Muzzle Tov!", he said and they had a few more. "Jack", she said, "You are not such a bad breed, but you need to send Fido to obedience school". When he objected, she told him she was not usually a Pointer, but he was in a Droolofdenial and that if he wanted to see her again, he'd have to obey. Well, our Jack tried many schools, he even went as far away as Labrador, Newfoundland, the Great Pyrenees, even Afghanistan, Lhasa Apso, Chihuahua and Brittany. But none could train his Fido not to drool. He had run away for months. He even prayed to Saint Bernard for guidance. Finally, he returned to the pub and was panting when he saw Germaine,looking fetching in her Poodle skirt, eating Beagles & Lox and drinking Bassett Ale. When he went over to Retriever, he saw that she was curled up with a Husky Boxer, a Great Dane named Erik, who was eating his Chow with a Pinscher salt,some Collieflour and some Maltese candies. He was also taking a Pekingnese at her Schnauzer with his Bischon Frise, his Mastiff, as he tried to Whippet out. Russell thought it disgusting and trotted over to mark his territory. "Oh, Jack", she said, "Don't be Samoyed... what you felt was only Puppy Love for me, what I love about Erik is that he is a Rover, not a Setter, the best Keeshond I've had and he won't Stay unless I want him to!" Jack slinked out of the pub, with his tail between his legs, saying, "That Bitch, I'm so past Cairn! I don't give a Rin Tin Tin for her"

Etymology: drool (slobber, saliva spilling from the mouth,pretentious or silly talk or writing) & denial ((psychiatry) a defense mechanism that denies painful thoughts;the act of refusing to comply (as with a request);the act of asserting that something alleged is not true) & Jewel of The Nile (for rhyming effect)(a popular 1985 Michael Douglas/Kathleen Turner/Danny DeVito movie whose tagline was "When the going gets tough, the tough get going".

Points: 443

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