Verboticism: Lackcident

'Should I call an ambulance?'

DEFINITION: v. To deny that you have stupidly injured yourself for fear of punishment or ridicule. n. A person who won't admit it when they shoot themselves in the foot (which they seem to do quite often).

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Lackcident

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: lak sid dent

Sentence: The upper management at the Quick Letter Company, who made big signs, brought in a new edgy Health and Safety Program designed to reduce the injury rate at their manufacturing facility. They offered rewards like cash, merchandise and paid days off as incentives to those employees who had few or no missed days due to workplace injuries. The theory was great, the company would get compensation rebates for no lost times and raise safety awareness. The lost time days vanished and it appeared that they had broken all previous safety records on the job. It soon became evident, however, that people failed to report the work injuries in the hope of winning fabulous prizes. People smuggled in their own first aid kits and treated themselves secretly as each mishap occurred, and failed to report them. The management should have been more suspicious of employees with staples stuck in their fingers, nails protruding from feet and all manner of bruises and bumps not visible earlier in the day. The common response to "What happened to you?" was "It happened at home." Since they could prove no corruption of their program, it continued, with all it's suspicious events. Everything was fine until one day, when someone drove a forklift too quickly into a company sign and one of the metal letters in the words "Quick Letter Company" fell from a high height on a manager's head, embedded itself in his cranium and reduced him to a blinded, blethering fool. Yes, having a lackcident is fun until someone loses an "i"!

Etymology: Lack (not have, be without) & Accident (a mishap; especially one causing injury or death)

Points: 902

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Comments: Lackcident

silveryaspen - 2009-04-14: 11:35:00
I luved the sleye, witty, w-I's-e ending! Your lacksIdental story and verbotomy caught my aye!

abrakadeborah - 2009-04-17: 03:32:00
What a great mind's "I" you have Nosila! :) I enjoyed your story!