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'This may hurt a little. So tell me, how are your kids?'

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.

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Verboticisms

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Speakuneasy

Created by: KenM2

Pronunciation:

Sentence: as soon as the dentist placed the the drill in my mouth he started his speakuneasy.

Etymology: speak and uneasy

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Eloquesia

MrDave2176

Created by: MrDave2176

Pronunciation: ello-QWEE-shuh

Sentence: Dr. Lonnigan's eloquesia wasn't putting Harry at ease. In fact, his muttercal [filtered through medical apparatus] responses were painful to make and - to his ears - unintelligible.

Etymology: Eloqu(ence) + (anesth)esia EDIT: it occured to me that the word Queasy is sort of in there. I know I get a little queasy when the doctor starts talking to me.

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COMMENTS:

Will Doc Lonegan's eloquesia, cause Harry to have alopecia?! Great word. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-16: 23:02:00

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Proprattlaction

Created by: jmckays

Pronunciation: pro-prattl-aktion

Sentence: The doctor's proprattlaction proved ineffective as the scope slid into an intimate location no one but myself and my closest lovers had gone before...

Etymology: professional; prattle; distraction

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Yaplacate

Created by: Kevcom

Pronunciation: Yeah-plaa-kate

Sentence: Mr. Smith, the family doctor of the Joneses, often yaplicated to his patients so that he could carry on in his torturous dentistry operations without recieving yelps and complaints from his patients.

Etymology: yap (talk), placate (sooth)

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COMMENTS:

Says it all! - FayeWord, 2007-10-17: 17:47:00

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Painfutter

Created by: Seth89

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology: painful utter

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Anestactic

Created by: simoneshin

Pronunciation: an-uhs-tak-tik

Sentence: boy, nurse hilda had some good anestactics while doctor bob gently severed my toe. she kept on talking about that blueberry-lime cheesecake...

Etymology: anesthesia + tactic

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COMMENTS:

mrskellyscl good one. - mrskellyscl, 2010-02-11: 10:38:00

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Medigab

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: med/i/gab

Sentence: Dentist's medigab is designed to move the patient's attention past the procedure so they will be somewhat more relaxed.

Etymology: MEDIGAB - noun - from - MEDICAL + GAB

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Yackattack

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: YAK-uh-tak

Sentence: When Bertrand went in for his dental appointments he knew he was going to be bombarded with a yackattack from the dentist who never seemed to run out of inane questions and commments.

Etymology: Blend of 'yack' (Prolonged, sometimes senseless talk; chatter) and 'attack' (to set about (a task) or go to work on (a thing) vigorously)

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Communicache

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kom myun i kayke

Sentence: Every time Eddy went to see his Dentist, Dr.Iva Payne, he had to endure their usual communicache exchange. She would communicate with him inane questions about the weather, politics and his family and he would endure the ache. He honestly did not know how she understood him, but after years of doing this, she could understand the answers of her victims, er patients.

Etymology: Communicate (transmit thoughts or feelings or information) & Ache (pain)

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Healspiel

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: Heel-speel

Sentence: Until he met Dr Fang, Bob thought that Dr Payne's leechspeak was doctrivial. But after a few minutes with Fang, Bob soon realized that, despite all the healspiel, it hurts just as much to have a tooth extracted as it does to have one pulled.

Etymology: heal: to make better,well & spiel: plausible, glib talk; patter, line of gab. Doctrivial: blend of doctor, doctrine and trivial.

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COMMENTS:

Showoff, great job. - fourgirls, 2007-10-16: 09:59:00

how true - Jabberwocky, 2007-10-16: 12:27:00

nice blending - scrabbelicious, 2007-10-18: 07:44:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 17:54:00
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-11: 00:03:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James