Verboticisms

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: präksplitiv

Sentence: ”What the fudge is wrong with you? You’re a frickin rock star”, fumed Iggy’s manager. ”You’re supposed to be a hard-brass who curses like a sailor and the best we can get out of you is a proxpletive”.

Etymology: proxy (a person authorized to act on behalf of another) + expletive (an oath or swear word)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fo kuss

Sentence: Dr.Seemore Glasses was an optometrist and normally a man of vision. Born a Presbyopic, he'd rather ride the cataracts than attend Church or Temple. He was short-sighted in one aspect: he was afraid to make a spectacle of himself in front of his clients. Although it sounded cornea, he hated to swear in front of them. He would tell them he needed to fauxcuss, when they did or said something stupid. One fellow kept making an astigmatism of himself, so Dr. Seemore stopped seeing him, before their macular degenerated anymore. Through his contacts, the doctor also teaches at the university and lens his experience to the newbies. Unfortunately, the boring nature of eye topics often made his pupils dilate. One day he fauxcussed on his lovely assistant, Iris,who he claimed was untidy, blind to messes and kept their office like a sty. She in turn accused Dr. Seemore of ogling her. Although it later turned out that she was bipolarized and also binocular, she pressed charges. As the police led away the good Dr.Seemore, he was heard to yell, "I've been framed!"

Etymology: Faux (not genuine or real; being an imitation of the genuine article) & Cuss (profane or obscene expression usually of surprise or anger;utter obscenities or profanities)

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COMMENTS:

Good word! - Mustang, 2008-05-08: 07:45:00

best word this month!! - galwaywegian, 2008-05-08: 12:13:00

The story alone is worth a vote! - pieceof314, 2008-05-08: 14:05:00

wow - so many good words today - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-08: 14:22:00

Spot on - Love it! - Tigger, 2008-05-08: 18:59:00

Excellent. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-08: 19:35:00

My fave - arrrteest, 2008-05-08: 22:39:00

I'd like to thank the members of the Academy...Cheers All! - Nosila, 2008-05-08: 23:09:00

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: bloo-pur-poo-pur

Sentence: Those blooperpoopers really annoy me . Only the other day I heard a woman say she had got in a right mucking fuddle, it took me ages to realise what she meant.

Etymology: Blooper(something that should not have been said)Pooper(To ruin, spoil)

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Created by: pieceof314

Pronunciation: sub-ter-fyood

Sentence: Marvin mumbled under his breath, "You rockem sockem, bean pole ridin, frickin, dung eating, rear end of a moose's petutie." "What?" responded his partner, "You can certainly come up with better subterfeud than that, can't you?" "Uh, what a BEACH!"

Etymology: subterfuge, Late Latin subterfugium, from Latin subterfugere to escape, evade, from subter- secretly (from subter underneath; + fugere to flee + feud, a mutual enmity or quarrel that is often prolonged or inveterate

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Created by: verbherder

Pronunciation: els-swair

Sentence: Howie Mandel always uses vulgarities, but Ed Begley Jr. speaks like a saint. Elseswears come out of his mouth in place of curse words even when he's talking about Mark Harmon and Denzel Washington.

Etymology: else (in some other way) + swear (To use profane oaths; curse)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: yoo fen iz im

Sentence: When Barney and his Mom fought it was funny. When they spoke of the other, they only said a youphenism, instead of the really rude words they were thinking.

Etymology: You (2nd person singular) & Euphenism (A euphemism is a substitution of an agreeable or less offensive expression in place of one that may offend or suggest something unpleasant to the listener,[1] or in the case of doublespeak, to make it less troublesome for the speaker.)

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: Pyu-tres-oh--TER-ik

Sentence: What was said, in a putresoteric drone, by the old "sea-salt" that made the seasoned skanky-ho blush so profoundly?

Etymology: Blend of PUTRESCENCE: rotting; fig: obscene or profane; vulgar; as foul words or language & ESOTERIC: "belonging to the inner circle," private, secret, confidential.

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Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation: pro-f-eye-nn

Sentence: I'm sorry officer but you must have misheard me. If we do go to court I think you will find that 'crucking funt' is a profinity and not a profanity.

Etymology: Turning the profane into the profine was an art form perfected by the French aristocracy in the early years of the republic. They were also helped by atrocious aural hygiene standards during this period of history.

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COMMENTS:

reminds me of the guy on Capitol Steps who tells the stories with initial letters transposed. One concluded thast Haris Pilton simply needed a little soap in her hole; then there was the spale of Elliot Titzler.... - stache, 2008-05-08: 19:02:00

...er, Titzer. You know, the guy wh went to all the hicey prookers? nd I mean hicey. We're not talking bwenty tucks. No, not birty thucks. No, not even borty...never mind. - stache, 2008-05-08: 19:05:00

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: sŭb'tər-fēm'

Sentence: "GOT DANDRUFF, SOMEOFITITCHES!" Grandpa shouted his well-known subterpheme, as he bonked his thumb with the ball-peen hammer for the third time.

Etymology: 'sub,' short for underwater marine vessel, also used to describe an oversized sandwich served on long bread; 'terph,' alt. of turf, locale where one finds one's homies; 'eme,' collapsed form of e-me, avatar used as an on-line representation of oneself.

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Created by: tyler775

Pronunciation: /par * ah * ka * ore/

Sentence: Whenever our boss acts very rule and demanding, we call him the parracore 'flux bucket' behind his back.

Etymology: *Parra- from Greek prefix Para- meaning apart from or abnormal. *Suffix -core from English which meant stubborn or unyielding prior to 1930s

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