Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in ex zer sha

Sentence: Randy decided that five years away from his fitness club was too long. Inspired by infomercials and a waistline that kept thickening, he decided to re-enroll and get back the hard body he once proudly showed off at the beach. He carefully parked his car as close as possible to the gym - no sense risking a fall on icy pavement before he even started. When he arrived, a cute redhead was working out on an exercise bike. Without stretching or warming up, he mounted the bike beside her and peddled like the wind. After 10 minutes, he threw his leg up to dismount and pulled his groin muscle so hard that 3 attendants had to pull him off the machine and lay him on the floor, where he waited in agony until the ambulance arrived. What did this inexertia end up costing him altogether? $100 gym fee; $500 ambulance ride;$2,500 hospital fees;$500 for pain meds; $200 for having his car towed; $500 to reclaim it later at the impound yard; new shorts $50 (the old ones had to be cut off);and a date with the cute redhead who had visions of her potential suitor being unable to give her children: Priceless!

Etymology: inertia (the tendency of a body to maintain a state of rest or uniform motion unless acted upon by an external force;a disposition to remain inactive or inert) & exertion (use of physical or mental energy; hard work)

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COMMENTS:

Makes me hurt all over just reading it. lol GOOD word!! - Mustang, 2008-05-06: 04:48:00

Oh, that's just perfect. - ErWenn, 2008-05-06: 11:24:00

Muscles come and go; flab lasts. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-06: 17:46:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: FIT-ness-schlump

Sentence: Randall returned to the gym with great zeal after a several month layoff from his workout routine but he had become such a fitnesschlump that he managed to pull several muscles and wrench his back after an over ambitious workout.

Etymology: blend of 'fitness' and 'schlump' (a slovenly person; slob)

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COMMENTS:

Schlumperb word - Nosila, 2009-06-18: 20:56:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: fit - nus - slump

Sentence: Edgar had every intention of quickly regaining muscle tone and getting back on the conditioning routine but found he'd experienced a major fitnesslump and decided to forget the whole thing and return to his couch.

Etymology: Blend of fitness and slump

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COMMENTS:

That sounds like a nasty sort of lump. Should get it seen to. - petaj, 2008-05-06: 03:37:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: work owch

Sentence: Bradley's quest to get trim again turned into a workouch. He dropped a weight on his toe, pulled a groin muscle doing lunges and banged his head on the bench press, after he accidentally lost his grip. His workouch will take him to the workcouch for a week of tv to recover.

Etymology: Workout (exercise regime;the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit) & Ouch (interjection used to express sudden pain)

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Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: mus/cah/la/tore/chur

Sentence: Musculatorture occurs when the muscles are strained beyond endurance which often happens trying to open the heavy gym doors.

Etymology: musculature + torture

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Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: hyper-gym-nast

Sentence: You could tell he was heading for hypergymnasty, by the way he overdid it the very first day.

Etymology: hyper-gym-nast

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Created by: alicat

Pronunciation: Ex-er-dem-eyes

Sentence: Sue hadn't been to the gym in years but decided that it was time to jump back on that horse. She went to a spinning class, gave it her all, and left feeling like a new woman. When she woke up the next morning, however, she realized that she had reached her exerdemise.

Etymology: Exercise + demise

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COMMENTS:

good one - Nosila, 2009-06-18: 20:54:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hurt ills

Sentence: Frankie's new fitness routine was self-designed and not well thought out. He tried to force ten years of inactivity into one afternoon at the gym to get in shape. Of course he instead caused himself a series of hurtills which required medical attention.

Etymology: Hurdles (to jump a barrier)& Hurt (injured;feel pain or be in pain ) & Ills (not in good physical or mental health)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: natch hurt o path ee

Sentence: Arnold's naturopathy exercises turned into nathurtopathy exercises when he strained himself on his dumbells...apparently they were aptly named.

Etymology: Naturopathy (a method of treating disease using food and exercise and heat to assist the natural healing process) & Hurt (sore, in pain)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: wayt for sur juree

Sentence: Smedley was determined to turn himself from a bookish, skinny nerd into a bronzed, buff love god. Unfortunately, he did not prepare himself properly...his bid to get laser surgery to correct his myopia failed and he needed even stronger glasses. His day at the tanning salon was also a disaster since he looked like a buttered lobster when done. And his weight training at the gym made him tear tendons, ligaments and caused him to become a weightforsurgery case. With any luck he'd be back to his old nerdy self in 6-9 months. He should have left well enough alone!

Etymology: weight (sports equipment used in calisthenic exercises and weightlifting; a weight that is not attached to anything and is raised and lowered by use of the hands and arms) & For Surgery (a medical procedure involving an incision with instruments; performed to repair damage or arrest disease in a living body) Rhymes with Wait for Surgery...all too common and lengthy a wait these days, sadly)

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