Verboticisms

Created by: marianasoffer

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology: No - negation ASkHole - asshole/ask hole

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: krass issss tant

Sentence: The crassistant finally gave her the attention she had been trying to attract for the previous twenty minutes. In less than one minute he managed to detatch the barbecue tongs from what was left of his manhood, gift wrap it and hand it to her with such a dazzling smile that she didn't carry out plan b after all. she left the store, dropping the garlic crush on the floor as she walked out.

Etymology: assistant, crass

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COMMENTS:

Great word gww! - didsbury, 2008-05-13: 13:53:00

She didn't give him much choice as she had him in a eunique position. Just lucky she didn't threaten him with a castrato iron fry pan - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 15:37:00

...or the dreaded brissket pan. Excellent word — great sentence too. Girl's got attitude! - Tigger, 2008-05-13: 17:45:00

Sometimes, you've just gotta grab their attention... - Nosila, 2008-05-13: 23:28:00

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: dĭ-sō'shē-ĭt

Sentence: After she made her way back to the electronics department, having to make her way past one dissociate after another who, apparently oblivious to her existence or that of any other customer, had no apparent function beyond taking up aisle space, the blue-smocked critters became scarce. When she finally found one and asked where she could find an adapter to use her ipod with her home stereo, the dull-eyed response was, "that's not my aisle, but if we have 'em they would definitely be in this half of the store."

Etymology: dissociate (-āt'), from the psychological defense mechanism dissociation, whereby an individual compartmentalizes certain thoughts, emotions, sensations, and/or memories; term coined by The French psychiatrist Pierre Janet, later expanded on in Jung's theories; associate (-ĭt), term used by a certain (world's largest)retailer as a euphamism for what passes as a sales staff.

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COMMENTS:

Like it! - pieceof314, 2008-05-13: 13:29:00

thanks, 314. first time I've tried to give a verbotomy to an existing word. - stache, 2008-05-13: 17:02:00

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Vecks-kewz-amee

Sentence: Im really fed up with those vexqueuesamees, every time I go into that shop I have to wait ages in the queue whilst those girls chat away. Im sure I must know their business more than they do by now!

Etymology: Vex (perturbed,put out) Queues(a long line of customers waiting to be served) =Vexqueuesamee(excuse me)

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COMMENTS:

funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 15:41:00

Vexcellent vord! - Nosila, 2008-05-13: 23:21:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: snub skrybe

Sentence: "It's no wonder people shoplift", Betty thought as she waited yet again at Customer Service to make a payment on her layaway. The cashier was going to snubscribe her again because he was too busy yakking on his cellphone on a social call. Fed up, she went to the Store Manager and told him loudly that the hardest part about shopping there was the fact that you had to wait endlessly for them to take your money. The Store Manager would have responded to her sooner, but he was too busy texting someone...

Etymology: Snub (refuse to acknowledge;ignore) & Subscribe (receive or obtain by regular payment;pay (an amount of money) as a contribution to a charity or service, especially at regular intervals)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: at ten duns

Sentence: Jason was typical of the attendunts a retail store can afford, someone who spent his whole shift texting and phoning friends. Jason made people sorry they stopped by. When the CEO came on a Royal Visit, the whole entourage got busy and decorated the store. Except Jason, who told his immediate supervisor (who was 17) that he had to catch up on his filing. I smell an audit coming. Jason is now filing again...his unemployment papers.

Etymology: Attendant (cashier or clerk) & Dunts (To strike; give a blow to; knock) &dunce (stupid person)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: närsəssərvis

Sentence: Meme just knew that some day soon she would be discovered by a Hollywood Producer or modeling agent. The only reason she was working at the Mall was because her mom just didn't understand how much money she needed for her wardrobe and makeup and, of course, for the exposure. As she provided narcisservice to her customers, and practiced her texting skills, she wondered why it was taking so long to become famous.

Etymology: narcissist (extreme selfishness, with a grandiose view of one's own talents and a craving for admiration) + service (the action of helping or doing work for someone)

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Created by: didsbury

Pronunciation: mal-conn-ten-dant

Sentence: I am in a hurry but the staff in this shop are all such malcontendants there is no one who will serve me.

Etymology: Combination of malcontent and attendant. First used by Mark Twain to describe a particularly slovenly, family-run restaurant he visited in Mississippi. The restaurant gained notoriety and indeed some short lived success until it was forcibly closed by the owners who had a sense of humour failure when even physical abuse of the clientele wasn't enough to deter the hordes of malcontent-watchers.

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COMMENTS:

very nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 15:40:00

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: sales/clurk/sum/ness

Sentence: Sally's excitement about shopping at the new megastore was quickly squelched when she discovered the salesclirksomeness of the staff who flipped a 'this register closed' at 9 of the 10 queues.

Etymology: sales clerk + irksomeness(irritating, maddening, infuriating)

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Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: patron+neglect

Sentence: Patroneglect at the mall was almost bad enough to make me yearn for the steady but excruciatingly slow attention customers get at the Post Office.

Etymology: patron+neglect

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