Verboticisms

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: krass issss tant

Sentence: The crassistant finally gave her the attention she had been trying to attract for the previous twenty minutes. In less than one minute he managed to detatch the barbecue tongs from what was left of his manhood, gift wrap it and hand it to her with such a dazzling smile that she didn't carry out plan b after all. she left the store, dropping the garlic crush on the floor as she walked out.

Etymology: assistant, crass

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COMMENTS:

Great word gww! - didsbury, 2008-05-13: 13:53:00

She didn't give him much choice as she had him in a eunique position. Just lucky she didn't threaten him with a castrato iron fry pan - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-13: 15:37:00

...or the dreaded brissket pan. Excellent word — great sentence too. Girl's got attitude! - Tigger, 2008-05-13: 17:45:00

Sometimes, you've just gotta grab their attention... - Nosila, 2008-05-13: 23:28:00

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Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: patron+neglect

Sentence: Patroneglect at the mall was almost bad enough to make me yearn for the steady but excruciatingly slow attention customers get at the Post Office.

Etymology: patron+neglect

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: cashier-basher

Sentence: Despite the number of cashearbashers working at CashCow, they seemed to make inordinate amounts of money. Yet, every week on the current affairs show, there were complainants describing their pitiful stories of how they had been ignored by sales staff too busy chatting to offer real service and how they had resorted to violence to get some attention.

Etymology: cashier + earbasher (someone who talks a lot) + basher (customer who eventually gives the chatty cashier a black eye)

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Created by: stache

Pronunciation: dĭ-sō'shē-ĭt

Sentence: After she made her way back to the electronics department, having to make her way past one dissociate after another who, apparently oblivious to her existence or that of any other customer, had no apparent function beyond taking up aisle space, the blue-smocked critters became scarce. When she finally found one and asked where she could find an adapter to use her ipod with her home stereo, the dull-eyed response was, "that's not my aisle, but if we have 'em they would definitely be in this half of the store."

Etymology: dissociate (-āt'), from the psychological defense mechanism dissociation, whereby an individual compartmentalizes certain thoughts, emotions, sensations, and/or memories; term coined by The French psychiatrist Pierre Janet, later expanded on in Jung's theories; associate (-ĭt), term used by a certain (world's largest)retailer as a euphamism for what passes as a sales staff.

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COMMENTS:

Like it! - pieceof314, 2008-05-13: 13:29:00

thanks, 314. first time I've tried to give a verbotomy to an existing word. - stache, 2008-05-13: 17:02:00

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Created by: youmustvotenato

Pronunciation: Steve+Clerk-ol

Sentence: The line growing increasingly longer, the SteveClerkel, immersed in his conversation with his girfriend couldn't sense that everyone in line wanted to strangle him.

Etymology: Steve Urkel (the annoying TV character) + Clerk

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: TILL-shy

Sentence: Why don't you shop on-line, and stop rudely interrupting my day, was the routine retort to customers from the tillshy, check-out "chick".

Etymology: Combination of TILL: drawer for money in cash-register etc., & SHY: as in workshy - to be afraid of.

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Created by: rombus

Pronunciation: kr - ass - is - tant

Sentence: Dominick was waited on by a crassistant in the local Starbucks.... She grudgingly took his order because he interrupted her "texting" marathon.

Etymology: crass (lacking in discrimination and sensibility), assistant

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COMMENTS:

good one - Mustang, 2009-06-26: 02:17:00

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Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: slack er cash er

Sentence: Bill first thought the store had planted a mannequin, arms crossed, at the cash desk. She possessed a vacant stare and exhibited limited life. He stood perplexed, waited for the slackercasher to get into motion. Patience turned to desperation as he heard another cusstomer behind him snarl for help. “OK LET’S GET SOME SERVICE HERE, we don’t have all day!” The slackercasher did get into action: she picked up her cell and began typing a text! Bill resigned to step over to wait in a long line of another aisle.

Etymology: From slacker and casher or cashier.

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: cells-rep

Sentence: Adept at multitasking, Sean excelled as a cellsrep by chatting with his girlfriend, waiting on customers and doing his geometry homework all at the same time.

Etymology: cells: cellular + rep (short for representative) as in sales rep.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: un siv ill ser vant

Sentence: Megan was definitely a most uncivilservant. She never allowed anything as insignificant as a customer to interrupt her busy day. She was in a deep phone conversation (the fourth today) with her best friend, Vanessa, who was on duty working in another store, two blocks away. Their brainy exchanges usually went "Well, he says,I don't know,like, what are you doing?" "And I go,like, I dunno" "And he says 'Whatever'". "Can you imagine? Like, as if." Megan carried on in this vein for like five or ten minutes, when a customer arrived at her till. The customer was getting impatient. Megan glowered at him and turned her back to continue her very important phone call. When the man started saying, "Excuse me", Megan reluctantly turned around and chewing gum loudly, with her phone jammed into her ear, gave him an impatient "What do you want?" gesture with hands and face. Too late she twigged he wore a balaclava and held a gun in one hand (pointed at her head)and a bag to collect the money he was going to rob from her till, in the other hand. "Oh-Ma-God", she thought, "My cell phone is dying..."

Etymology: uncivil(rude, impolite,lacking good manners) & servant (one who serves or provides a service) & civil servant for rhyming (a public official, member of the civil service)

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