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'Are you just browsing?'

DEFINITION: n. An overbearing or pushy salesperson who makes you want to leave a store rather than look around and buy something. v. To aggressively sell something to someone who doesn't want it.

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Verboticisms

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Sirenade

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: sīrəˈnād

Sentence: Melody is a wonderful salesperson. Even her detractors have to admit she is hard to resist. Once she starts her sirenade, the sale is all but final. The first verse usually starts with **How may I help You Today?** The final chorus... **Come see us again**. Her song can be soothing, flirting, or annoying but always unrelenting. Anyone who wanders too close buys something. A customer once tried to return an ugly green sweater and returned home with two sweaters, one blue and one yellow. **Blue and yellow make green** made sense when Melody said it.

Etymology: siren (Greek Mythology each of a number of women or winged creatures whose singing lured unwary sailors onto rocks) + serenade (a piece of music sung or played in the open air, typically by a man at night under the window of his lover)

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Shopressor

CharlieB

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: shop-res-er

Sentence: Kevin was so excited about the prospect of someone buying one of his hand made silk shirts, that he unfortunately morphed from laid back salesman to fidgety shopressor.

Etymology: shop (to buy merchandise) + oppressor (someone who puts pressure on others)

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Pushinator

Created by: jonobo

Pronunciation: "push" like in push + "inator" like in terminator.

Sentence: At first sight i thought he would just be an average standard legal pusher, then i had to realise that he was at least one of those new powerpusher models, but when i tried to leave the shop he showed his real potential and i finally came to the only rational conclusion left: he was the Pushinator.

Etymology: Pusher + Terminator = Pushinator.

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Peddlerpushers

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: ped/lur/push/urs

Sentence: Our local video store is full of peddlerpushers who sneak up behind you when you're deep in thought and then shadow you relentlessly as you peruse the movie selection

Etymology: peddler + pusher + pedal pushers

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COMMENTS:

funny AND fashionable! - galwaywegian, 2007-05-16: 06:06:00

how did you see that so fast - you must work in our video store - Jabberwocky, 2007-05-16: 06:09:00

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Sellcubus

Created by: cohenarie

Pronunciation:

Sentence: The obnoxiously obsequious sellcubus cleaved to me the moment I entered the store, offering a pitch on each item I browsed.

Etymology: sell + succubus (or incubus)

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Offenseller

Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /əˈfɛnˈsɛlɚ/

Sentence: Sadly, for every person who is pushed out of the store by an offenseller, there are two more who are convinced to buy something that they wouldn't have otherwise.

Etymology: From offensive + seller

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COMMENTS:

I voted already, but I like this one. An offenseller seems like an instoramus. - Clayton, 2007-05-16: 19:55:00

Thanks. I seem to get that a lot if I decide to go to bed before 1 or 2am and end up making up my words the next morning. - ErWenn, 2007-05-16: 22:38:00

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Shopcreeper

Created by: ziggy41

Pronunciation: Shawp-kreep-err

Sentence: That shopcreeper was pushing me way too much. I grabbed that stupid block of cheese he was trying to sell me and shoved it right in his mouth. He now sells basketballs because he knows no one can stuff those in his mouth... I proved him wrong.

Etymology: Shopkeeper (owner of a shop that sells goods) + creep (an annoying and detestable person)

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COMMENTS:

I already gave my vote to peddlarpusher, but this is even better. - cohenarie, 2007-05-16: 10:51:00

Nice one. - Clayton, 2007-05-16: 14:55:00

great ...awesome - pguse, 2007-06-01: 14:00:00

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Impeddler

Created by: Discoveria

Pronunciation: imm-PED-lur

Sentence: The impeddler was so obnoxious that I stormed out of the shop, accidentally breaking some cheap plastic products on my way out.

Etymology: impede (to obstruct or hinder) + peddler (a travelling seller of goods)

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Vulturoso

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: vul-tsur-OH-so

Sentence: When new customers would come into the showroom Ronald would become a smooth operting vulturoso and would pounce on the prospect with high pressure tactics and almost always succeeded in getting a sale.

Etymology: Blend of the words 'vulture' (n. 2. A person of a rapacious, predatory, or profiteering nature) and 'virtuoso' (n. 1. a person who has special knowledge or skill in a field)

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Salesdouche

Created by: Paulefinch

Pronunciation: sails-doosh'

Sentence: I was going to buy a few new cds, but the salesdouche just made me want to leave.

Etymology: salesman+douchebag

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-05-16: 03:36:00
Today's definition was suggested by iwasatripwire. Thank you iwasatripwire! ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-12-01: 00:16:00
Today's definition was suggested by iwasatripwire. Thank you iwasatripwire. ~ James