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'Yikes! Spring is almost here and this stupid scale is still wrong.'

DEFINITION: n. That sinking feeling you get when you realize that you will be shedding your winter coat, before you can possibly shed the extra layer of insulation (i.e. fat) that you gained over the winter. v. To worry about your weight.

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Verboticisms

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Springleaning

thegoatisbad

Created by: thegoatisbad

Pronunciation: spring-lem-ing

Sentence: Kimberly yawned and began to excavate her way out of her bedding. When she looked out of the window in her Den and saw the daffodils poking through layers of dead leaves and sticks; she knew it was time for springleaning. She began by dusting off and climbing onto the scale. The number was no more grisly than it had been in previous years and she glanced at the number, at herself in the mirror and then began searching her pantry for rice cakes.

Etymology: spring ("time of growth") + gleaning (gather bit by bit) Play on "Spring Cleaning"

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Physeek

CharlieB

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: fizz-eek

Sentence: Stepping on the scales, Jeannie struggled to come to terms with her new physeek.

Etymology: physical (of the body) + eek (a squeak of fear) + physique (physical or bodily structure or appearance)

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Springdumb

Created by: BMott

Pronunciation: spring-dumb

Sentence: She realized she had suffered a case of springdumb all winter as she munched on twinkies to keep the winter blues at bay, forgetting that spring bikinis would soon be in fashion.

Etymology: Spring: That lovely time of year when everything blooms, but your body isn't supposed to. -- Dumb: The ability to ignore the obvious.

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Blubs

contiki

Created by: contiki

Pronunciation: blubbs

Sentence: After I saw the number on the scale it really gave me the blubs :(

Etymology: Blubber + blues

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Bikinevasion

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: bikini-vay-shun

Sentence: Carlotta sighed as she examined the flabby white flesh exposed when she took off her coat. Yes, bikinevasion season had arrived.

Etymology: bikini (two piece swimwear) + evasion (avoidance)

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COMMENTS:

funny petaj - Jabberwocky, 2007-02-28: 15:37:00

petaj thanks - petaj, 2007-03-01: 04:58:00

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Equinoxious

Created by: Alchemist

Pronunciation: eh-kwuh-NOKS-shush

Sentence: As Barb peered over her belly to read the scale she felt so equinoxious she had to sit down. She began to sob, "Damn, I KNEW I should've thrown those last dozen fruitcakes away!"

Etymology: equinox (first day of spring) + anxious with a side of noxious.

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Frostflabitis

Created by: sunny

Pronunciation:

Sentence: As the first robin flew past her window, she stepped upon the scale and was struck by a bout of frostflabitis.

Etymology:

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Pounderance

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pown der ans

Sentence: Paula hated the onslaught of spring because of worrying whether or not she could wear a bikini at the shore. Each year was more of a pounderance for her than the last. She would soon have to shop at the Big Girls' Stores or consider moving far from the beach.

Etymology: Pound (unit of weight measurement) & Ponderance (weight/gravity of something thought about;reflect deeply on it)

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Poundxiety

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pownd zuy etee

Sentence: When Betsey lived in Montana, she dreaded Spring, because her poundxiety would return. She knew she had gained some pounds over Christmas and winter and had a hard time losing it. At her doctor's office, the scale read 187 pounds...thirty more than normal for her. When her husband was transferred to Canada, she was delighted to find that at her new doctor's office, she only weighed in at 85...she figured all the effort and stress of the move had helped her slim down,until her doctor pointed out that her weight was measured here in kilograms. He told her that if she had transferred to England, she'd only weigh 13.35 (stone that is).

Etymology: Pounds (weight measurement, especially of the body) & Anxiety ( a vague unpleasant emotion that is experienced in anticipation of some (usually ill-defined) misfortune;a relatively permanent state of anxiety occurring in a variety of mental disorders)

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Exertsighs

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: ex ert syz

Sentence: Every year at this time, Phyllis Withbread, goes through the agony of how much winter weight she has gained. In an effort to try a lose a few pounds, she races herself each year to lose weight before the snow all melts. Between meagre diet and exertsighs, she tries to ruminweight about her extra pounds and kilos. Luckily for Phyllis, the snow won't be gone until May or June, so she will have longer to fight the Battle of the Bulge, the Scales of Injustice and the Mounds of Pounds.

Etymology: Exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit) & Exert (make a great effort at a mental or physical task) & Sighs (heave or utter a sigh; breathe deeply and heavily)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-02-28: 00:08:31
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes.
Thank you purpleartichokes! ~ James