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'Yikes! Spring is almost here and this stupid scale is still wrong.'

DEFINITION: n. That sinking feeling you get when you realize that you will be shedding your winter coat, before you can possibly shed the extra layer of insulation (i.e. fat) that you gained over the winter. v. To worry about your weight.

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Verboticisms

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Equinoxious

Created by: Alchemist

Pronunciation: eh-kwuh-NOKS-shush

Sentence: As Barb peered over her belly to read the scale she felt so equinoxious she had to sit down. She began to sob, "Damn, I KNEW I should've thrown those last dozen fruitcakes away!"

Etymology: equinox (first day of spring) + anxious with a side of noxious.

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Expostfatto

Created by: Discoveria

Pronunciation: Ex-post-fat-toe

Sentence: Brenda was more blue than the blues, more down than the Downs, and more depressed than her mattress springs. She was experiencing the post-Christmas dieter's syndrome of expostfatto.

Etymology: From "ex post facto", a legal term referring to laws that change the legal status of events that happened before the law is enacted. (i.e. Hoping that the effect of overeating can be changed.)

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COMMENTS:

The mattress reference is hillarious!! - purpleartichokes, 2007-02-28: 06:42:00

Took me a while to think up...but I didn't want to get rid of the beginning of the sentence! - Discoveria, 2007-02-28: 07:49:00

Silly, but amusing. - ErWenn, 2007-02-28: 11:57:00

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Sheddread

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: 'shed-dred

Sentence: Once again facing the awful prospect of having to lose the winter fat she had stored up, Carmen had an almost overwhelming case of sheddread, not sure she could drum up the discipline needed to pull it off.

Etymology: Blend of 'shed' (v. to cast off or let fall - leaves, hair, feathers, skin, shell, etc - by natural process) and 'dread' (n. terror or apprehension as to something in the future; great fear)

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Dressimism

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: dress-i-mi-zm

Sentence: Cheryl was dressimistic about her chances of fitting into the fabulous little frock she bought for the Spring Gala. Being a weightalist by nature, she just knew that her weight was sealed because both her life and the dress were unalterable.

Etymology: dress + pessimism: a tendency to see the gloomiest view of a situation

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Bulgeblues

Created by: jedijawa

Pronunciation: bulje-blues

Sentence: Mary got the buldgeblues every time she got on the scales and saw the holiday turkey show up to haunt her.

Etymology: buldge + blues

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Lipidowner

Created by: magenta

Pronunciation: li-pi-dau-ner

Sentence: I was on such a high today until I got on the scales - what a lipidowner that was.

Etymology: lipids(fats) + downer

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Pounderance

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pown der ans

Sentence: Paula hated the onslaught of spring because of worrying whether or not she could wear a bikini at the shore. Each year was more of a pounderance for her than the last. She would soon have to shop at the Big Girls' Stores or consider moving far from the beach.

Etymology: Pound (unit of weight measurement) & Ponderance (weight/gravity of something thought about;reflect deeply on it)

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Hibermodelosis

Created by: w5lf9s

Pronunciation: hy.ber.mo.del.oh.sis

Sentence: "I can't even see my toes when I'm standing on the scale" he whined. "Not unless you turn the light on", she replied flicking the switch. He was a clear case of hibermodelosis to her.

Etymology: The pathological need (psychosis) to get through the winter (hibernate)looking like a model and the resulting and unavoidable depression

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Lardistress

Created by: Osomatic

Pronunciation: lar dih stress

Sentence: "Lardistress" means that sinking feeling you get when you realize you will be shedding your winter coat before you can possibly shed the fat you gained over the holidays.

Etymology: From the Old Norman "chubummer."

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COMMENTS:

wow! It means EXACTLY that! you got my vote for the sterling sentence~ - Alchemist, 2007-03-01: 00:26:00

petaj It's ironic that all that lard would actually make one more buoyant literally, but not figuratively. Not to mention the negative effect on the figure. - petaj, 2007-03-01: 05:04:00

Thanks, Alchemist. It's the sort of thing one can only get away with once, though. :) - Osomatic, 2007-03-01: 14:26:00

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Springleaning

thegoatisbad

Created by: thegoatisbad

Pronunciation: spring-lem-ing

Sentence: Kimberly yawned and began to excavate her way out of her bedding. When she looked out of the window in her Den and saw the daffodils poking through layers of dead leaves and sticks; she knew it was time for springleaning. She began by dusting off and climbing onto the scale. The number was no more grisly than it had been in previous years and she glanced at the number, at herself in the mirror and then began searching her pantry for rice cakes.

Etymology: spring ("time of growth") + gleaning (gather bit by bit) Play on "Spring Cleaning"

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-02-28: 00:08:31
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes.
Thank you purpleartichokes! ~ James