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'This may hurt a little. So tell me, how are your kids?'

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.

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Verboticisms

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Qandaches

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kew and ayks

Sentence: Dr. Yvonne is one multi-tasking dentist. She can mask up, get both fists in your mouth simultaneously, probe and scrape and poke and pull and all the while, ask what you thought about medical/political/societal and philosophical issues, while giving you the benefit of her own thoughts on each topic and understanding your feeble, numb, unintelligible answers. At the same time, she gives verbal notes to her dental assistant for your file, as she tells her what she needs next and calculates your bill and how much your insurance will pay for each treatment. Yes, she has QandAches down to a fine science. No wonder they call her Leader of the Plaque!

Etymology: Q and A (Questions and Answers)& Aches (a dull persistent (usually moderately intense) pain; be the source of pain;feel physical pain)

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Antiease

Created by: FayeWord

Pronunciation: an-ti-ease

Sentence: The obgyn's kind and gentle words before the examination were all antiease.

Etymology: Against feeling at ease.

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Hospitalitalk

Created by: Koekbroer

Pronunciation: hos.pit.al.lee.torque

Sentence:

Etymology: hospital, talk

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Prostagrabgab

Created by: aayeye

Pronunciation: prŏs'tĭ-'grăb-găb

Sentence: Dr. Stinky would not shut up during my prostate exam. He definately has the gift of prostagrabgab.

Etymology: Postate+grab= prostate exam gab= chit chat during said exam

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Jabbertalky

Created by: TheFlawlessWord

Pronunciation:

Sentence: "Beware the Jabbertalk, my twit! The hose that sucks, the drills that buzz! Beware the dental bird, and spit The voluminous cottonmouth fuzz!"

Etymology: Apologies to Lewis Carroll

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Healspiel

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: Heel-speel

Sentence: Until he met Dr Fang, Bob thought that Dr Payne's leechspeak was doctrivial. But after a few minutes with Fang, Bob soon realized that, despite all the healspiel, it hurts just as much to have a tooth extracted as it does to have one pulled.

Etymology: heal: to make better,well & spiel: plausible, glib talk; patter, line of gab. Doctrivial: blend of doctor, doctrine and trivial.

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COMMENTS:

Showoff, great job. - fourgirls, 2007-10-16: 09:59:00

how true - Jabberwocky, 2007-10-16: 12:27:00

nice blending - scrabbelicious, 2007-10-18: 07:44:00

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Anesthymology

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Uh-nes-thym-ology

Sentence: The dentist absentmindedly practiced anesthymology when he attempted to distract his patients while he worked.

Etymology: Anesthesia- ology

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Wompachat

Created by: danny

Pronunciation: wom-pa-chat

Sentence: The wompachat eased the dental patient.

Etymology: chat- a conversion

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Defearism

Created by: aigle101

Pronunciation: de-fear-ism

Sentence: To "defear"in a moment of extreme fear or panic: "The dentist used defearism to make the patient feel comfortable"

Etymology: de; to undo - fear ;terribly scared of something

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COMMENTS:

makes sense to me .... - aigle101, 2007-10-17: 13:49:00

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Interrorgate

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: in ter or gayt

Sentence: When Dr.Payne had George in her dental chair, she often asked him casual questions to get his mind off his ordeal. But since he really could not answer the questions properly, he felt this questioning was a way to interrorgate him.

Etymology: Interrogate (pose a series of questions to) & Terror (an overwhelming feeling of fear and anxiety)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 17:54:00
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-11: 00:03:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James