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'This may hurt a little. So tell me, how are your kids?'

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.

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Verboticisms

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Healspiel

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: Heel-speel

Sentence: Until he met Dr Fang, Bob thought that Dr Payne's leechspeak was doctrivial. But after a few minutes with Fang, Bob soon realized that, despite all the healspiel, it hurts just as much to have a tooth extracted as it does to have one pulled.

Etymology: heal: to make better,well & spiel: plausible, glib talk; patter, line of gab. Doctrivial: blend of doctor, doctrine and trivial.

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COMMENTS:

Showoff, great job. - fourgirls, 2007-10-16: 09:59:00

how true - Jabberwocky, 2007-10-16: 12:27:00

nice blending - scrabbelicious, 2007-10-18: 07:44:00

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Zideronker

Created by: Nickvoreas

Pronunciation: Zid-er-onk-er

Sentence: the zideronkerist dentist continued to talk to her patient even while she stuffed his mouth full of tools.

Etymology:

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Jabwitter

Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Jabb-wit-er

Sentence: Dr B. Kindly always resorted to the tried and tested method of jabwitter to put his patients at ease while injecting them. He would ask them trivial questions, such as, where they were going for their holiday or what they intended to have for lunch to distract their attention away from the pain. After twenty years in the profession he found this was the best tactic to use on most people.

Etymology: Jab(a hypodermic injection) + Witter(to speak about trivial matters) = Jabwitter

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Ciadle

Created by: kenzieg

Pronunciation: see-addle

Sentence: Stop trying to ciadle with me.

Etymology: none

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Zitchat

Created by: crmow

Pronunciation: zit-chat

Sentence: Donna scheduled two medical appointments on the same day. At the dermatologist, she zitchatted about the weather. While having her mammogram, she titchatted with the technician about her pets.

Etymology: zit (pimple) + chitchat

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Blahnaesthesia

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: blah nast eee zya

Sentence: The blahnaesthesia ended up being more painful than the filling.

Etymology: anaesthesia, blah

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Yackattack

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: YAK-uh-tak

Sentence: During his dental procedures Elbert knew he was going to be hammered with a never ending yackattack by his dentist who never seemed to run out of questions and comments.

Etymology: Blend of 'yack' (Prolonged, sometimes senseless talk; chatter) and 'attack' (to set about or go to work on somethng vigorously)

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Communicache

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kom myun i kayke

Sentence: Every time Eddy went to see his Dentist, Dr.Iva Payne, he had to endure their usual communicache exchange. She would communicate with him inane questions about the weather, politics and his family and he would endure the ache. He honestly did not know how she understood him, but after years of doing this, she could understand the answers of her victims, er patients.

Etymology: Communicate (transmit thoughts or feelings or information) & Ache (pain)

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Yaplacate

Created by: Kevcom

Pronunciation: Yeah-plaa-kate

Sentence: Mr. Smith, the family doctor of the Joneses, often yaplicated to his patients so that he could carry on in his torturous dentistry operations without recieving yelps and complaints from his patients.

Etymology: yap (talk), placate (sooth)

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COMMENTS:

Says it all! - FayeWord, 2007-10-17: 17:47:00

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Verbandagize

Created by: NeuroGlyph

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 17:54:00
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-11: 00:03:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James