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'This may hurt a little. So tell me, how are your kids?'

DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.

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Yackattack

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: YAK-uh-tak

Sentence: When Bertrand went in for his dental appointments he knew he was going to be bombarded with a yackattack from the dentist who never seemed to run out of inane questions and commments.

Etymology: Blend of 'yack' (Prolonged, sometimes senseless talk; chatter) and 'attack' (to set about (a task) or go to work on (a thing) vigorously)

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Jabberflossy

Created by: wordslikevenom

Pronunciation: Jab-ber-floss-ee

Sentence: The dental nurse yanked the tape from the spool and pulling it taut, sliced down into Dick's incisors, grinning as she sawed to-and-fro. He could taste the blood from his gums running down into the back of his mouth. "One, two! One, two! And through and through the vorpal floss went snicker-snack! She left him dead, and with his head she went galumphing back". As the jabberflossy flowed so did the puddle beneath Dick's seat ...

Etymology: Jabber - To talk rapidly, unintelligibly, or idly. Floss - dental floss

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Speakuneasy

Created by: KenM2

Pronunciation:

Sentence: as soon as the dentist placed the the drill in my mouth he started his speakuneasy.

Etymology: speak and uneasy

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Eloquesia

MrDave2176

Created by: MrDave2176

Pronunciation: ello-QWEE-shuh

Sentence: Dr. Lonnigan's eloquesia wasn't putting Harry at ease. In fact, his muttercal [filtered through medical apparatus] responses were painful to make and - to his ears - unintelligible.

Etymology: Eloqu(ence) + (anesth)esia EDIT: it occured to me that the word Queasy is sort of in there. I know I get a little queasy when the doctor starts talking to me.

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COMMENTS:

Will Doc Lonegan's eloquesia, cause Harry to have alopecia?! Great word. - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-16: 23:02:00

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Faqsdicine

vmalcolm

Created by: vmalcolm

Pronunciation: /fæksdsin/

Sentence: While she was attending him, she engaged in a little faqsdicine to relax him a bit.

Etymology: FAQSDICINE. From FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions) + Medicine (the science which relates to the prevention, cure, or alleviation of disease)

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Communicache

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kom myun i kayke

Sentence: Every time Eddy went to see his Dentist, Dr.Iva Payne, he had to endure their usual communicache exchange. She would communicate with him inane questions about the weather, politics and his family and he would endure the ache. He honestly did not know how she understood him, but after years of doing this, she could understand the answers of her victims, er patients.

Etymology: Communicate (transmit thoughts or feelings or information) & Ache (pain)

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Splatterpatter

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: sp latt ur patt ur

Sentence: She engaged in constant splatterpatter, interjecting euphemisms and repatree through the constant stream of gristle and gore

Etymology: patter, splatter

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Zideronker

Created by: Nickvoreas

Pronunciation: Zid-er-onk-er

Sentence: the zideronkerist dentist continued to talk to her patient even while she stuffed his mouth full of tools.

Etymology:

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Wompachat

Created by: danny

Pronunciation: wom-pa-chat

Sentence: The wompachat eased the dental patient.

Etymology: chat- a conversion

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Antiease

Created by: FayeWord

Pronunciation: an-ti-ease

Sentence: The obgyn's kind and gentle words before the examination were all antiease.

Etymology: Against feeling at ease.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-16: 17:54:00
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology

lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-11: 00:03:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James