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DEFINITION: n., Forced small talk used by professional caregivers to put patients at ease. (Not usually effective.) v., To ask insipid questions while subjecting a person to an intimate, awkward or painful procedure.
Verboticisms
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Wompachat
Created by: danny
Pronunciation: wom-pa-chat
Sentence: The wompachat eased the dental patient.
Etymology: chat- a conversion
Ompafone
Created by: BigKP
Pronunciation: Ew-mp-a-fone
Sentence: The doctor continued to make ompafone with me during the procedure.
Etymology: Ompa- funny little people fone- projection
Jabwitter
Created by: TJayzz
Pronunciation: Jabb-wit-er
Sentence: Dr B. Kindly always resorted to the tried and tested method of jabwitter to put his patients at ease while injecting them. He would ask them trivial questions, such as, where they were going for their holiday or what they intended to have for lunch to distract their attention away from the pain. After twenty years in the profession he found this was the best tactic to use on most people.
Etymology: Jab(a hypodermic injection) + Witter(to speak about trivial matters) = Jabwitter
Folaxblabber
Created by: 532915
Pronunciation: fo-lax-blab-ber
Sentence: When Drew broke his arm was the doctor folaxblabbered to ease his pain more.
Etymology: F0-Fake LAX-relax BLABBER- small tall
Splatterpatter
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: sp latt ur patt ur
Sentence: She engaged in constant splatterpatter, interjecting euphemisms and repatree through the constant stream of gristle and gore
Etymology: patter, splatter
Yackattack
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: YAK-uh-tak
Sentence: When Bertrand went in for his dental appointments he knew he was going to be bombarded with a yackattack from the dentist who never seemed to run out of inane questions and commments.
Etymology: Blend of 'yack' (Prolonged, sometimes senseless talk; chatter) and 'attack' (to set about (a task) or go to work on (a thing) vigorously)
Yogurtshove
Created by: greenplaideyes
Pronunciation:
Sentence: My crazy dentist never quits her yogurtshoving when she wants to distract me from her horrid adventures about my cavernous mouth.
Etymology: yogurt-oozy shove-it's being forced upon you
Zitchat
Created by: crmow
Pronunciation: zit-chat
Sentence: Donna scheduled two medical appointments on the same day. At the dermatologist, she zitchatted about the weather. While having her mammogram, she titchatted with the technician about her pets.
Etymology: zit (pimple) + chitchat
Spitchat
Created by: mrskellyscl
Pronunciation: spit-chat
Sentence: Harold hated having to spitchat with the dentist when he had a mouth full of drool from novicaine and dental instruments jammed under his gums.
Etymology: wordplay on chitchat: an informal conversation
Anesthymology
Created by: Mustang
Pronunciation: Uh-nes-thym-ology
Sentence: The dentist absentmindedly practiced anesthymology when he attempted to distract his patients while he worked.
Etymology: Anesthesia- ology
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you again remistram! ~ James
OZZIEBOB - 2007-10-16: 05:32:00
Great definition and cartoon. Recently, I have had the need to attend a variety of medical professionals, and find that they engage in a fair bit of small talk. Dentists , by far, chatter and, also, seem to recommend the use of a wide range of products.
Thanks Ozziebob! I too have been at the dentist and walked out not only with a sore tooth, but also with a sore ear. ~ James
lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:50:00
whynecology
lumina - 2008-09-11: 00:56:00
Sorry bout that...didn't meant to comment...hit wrong button.
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James