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'I need to feel sexy again! Give me Britney's abs!'

DEFINITION: v. intr., To compensate for emotional rejection by trying to change one's appearance through aggressive dieting, exercise and/or plastic surgery -- common among aging divorcees.

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Verboticisms

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Tartificialing

Created by: Scrumpy

Pronunciation: tahrt-uh-fish-uhl-ng

Sentence: Bill was tartificialing to impress Monica who was the new girl in the office. But Ken, a guy in the office, became suspicious of Bill's self improvement.

Etymology: tart - (garish,overdone ex. to tart up ones appearance.) + artificial + ing

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COMMENTS:

I wonder if he achieved that look with tartificial sweeteners - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 10:53:00

I hope Bill's not a tartificious tataram! (A foolish old man,esp one with sex on his mind- Rasta slang (1930) - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-20: 17:51:00

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Metamorfailosis

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: metəmôrfāləsəs

Sentence: After his wife left, Bruce went on a gym spree. Fellow patrons knew him as big guy in the wet sweats. He expected a huge change. He experienced metamorfailosis. Caterpillar in. Caterpillar out.

Etymology: metamorphosis (a change of the form or nature of a thing or person into a completely different one) + Fail (be unsuccessful in achieving one’s goal)

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Dumprove

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: dum-proov

Sentence: After the divorce, Bert decided he needed to dumprove his image. He lost his unibrow with the help of Nair, but his beach-ball belly was going to need drastic surgery.

Etymology: dump, improve

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COMMENTS:

I thought the unibrow was fashionable again. Hmmm... Great word! - Scrumpy, 2007-09-20: 10:12:00

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Modimagefy

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: mod-im-ij-fy

Sentence: Jeb shouldn't have modifmagefied his body to look like Britney, as she had also modimagefied herself to look like Madonna, but was unsuccessful.

Etymology: modify + image

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Egoplasty

DaddyNewt

Created by: DaddyNewt

Pronunciation: EE-go-plaz-tee

Sentence: Make your egoplasty appointment soon.

Etymology: ego + medical term

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COMMENTS:

DrWebsterIII nice word - DrWebsterIII, 2012-10-24: 00:19:00

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Spreen

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: SPREEN

Sentence: Harsh words from Roxie and a glance in the mirror was enough to spreen Bob into a strict dietary regimen and a strenuous fitness program. Furthermore, he planned to re-assessed his progress every September; it was, I guess, a personal "Spreenclean."

Etymology: Blend of SPURN & PREEN. Cognates: Spreenie .n; Spreeny adj.

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Rejuvescape

Created by: lumina

Pronunciation: ree/joov/es/kape

Sentence: Once again Leo's friend's banded together for an intervention. After his last break-up they missed the warning signs. Sure enough they arrived at his apartment only find he had relapsed and was rejuvescaping again. It was a sad sight. Leo on the couch lost in a pile of exercise cd's, books, empty cans of Slim Fast, brochures for cosmetic procedures, and last but not least, a Thigh Master between his legs that they had to wrestle him for.

Etymology: Rejunvenate: Regenerate: return to life; get or give new life or energy. Escape: An inclination to retreat from unpleasant realities through diversion or fantasy.

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Vexyoursize

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: veks yor syes

Sentence: When Vicki left Victor, he knew he had to vexyoursize and change his appearance in order to win her back or attract someone new. He tried diets, exercise and really could not afford surgery. Depressed he went into a bar to drown his sorrows. Feeling a little tipsy and slurring his words a bit, he stumbled home in the dark. He passed a church and decided to pray to the angels for a new look. He awoke the next day in the church and was stunned to see his reflection in a mirror. He looked worse! How could this be? At that point an old Irish Priest appeared at his side and said, "My son, you must be careful what you ask for when praying to the angels! Your speech was so slurred that they misunderstood you. You asked for a rose, instead of a new nose, so they gave you a big red one. You asked for a gin, instead of a new chin, so they gave you a double. You asked for bigger ears, they thought you said big arrears, so now you're broke. You asked for new hair, they thought you said a good scare, so now you have been neutered. You asked for new legs, they thought you said new pegs, so you can hobble home on two wooden ones. You asked for slimmer thighs, they thought you said dimmer eyes, so now you'll need strong glasses. You asked for a firm jaw, they thought you said a claw, so now you'll look talon-ted!"

Etymology: Vex (change the arrangement or position of;disturb the peace of mind of; afflict with mental agitation or distress) & Ex (former partner) & Your Size (body image, appearance) & exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit)

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Transfigurence

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: trans-FIG-yur-ence

Sentence: Following a messy divorce that included a great deal of harsh criticism about his 'sagging' appearance, Martin began a rigorous program of transfigurence, and finding a great deal of success with his efforts has become a real hunk and is in great demand in the dating game.

Etymology: Based on the word 'transfigure' (vt. transform outwardly and usually for the better)

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Renaisensuate

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: Ree-nay-sen-shul-ate. Noun form: Renaisexual (a la Metrosexual, etc.)

Sentence: A glance in the mirror told Bob that he was hunkjunk: broad, bewigged and fifty, and greatly in need of a strict diet and a strenuous fitness regime to renaisensuate himself. Aucupation had been his pre-occupation, but now he had more feathered friends than fair ones. Perhaps, wondered Bob, would plastic surgery mould him into the renaisexual he longed to be?

Etymology: Blend of Renaissance: renewal, rebirth & sensual: pertaining to the body and physical senses & ate: suffix indicating action of person performing function. Aucupate:bird catching.

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COMMENTS:

I think Bob should use some common renaissense and opt for the good diet - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 11:24:00

Yikes!! sorry Ozziebob - I just realized you might be referring to yourself - hope I didn't insult you - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 13:56:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-20: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by staggolee. Thank you staggolee! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-09-20: 17:44:00
Sure was a tough one. Abfab Jab!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-02: 00:07:00
Today's definition was suggested by staggolee. Thank you staggolee. ~ James