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'I need to feel sexy again! Give me Britney's abs!'

DEFINITION: v. intr., To compensate for emotional rejection by trying to change one's appearance through aggressive dieting, exercise and/or plastic surgery -- common among aging divorcees.

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Verboticisms

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Abpolish

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: ab/poll/ish

Sentence: The only way to abpolish her demons and win back her self esteem was to throw herself wholeheartedly into sculpting a new physique.

Etymology: ab (as in abdominal) + polish + abolish

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COMMENTS:

Anuddergudun'! - Scrumpy, 2007-09-20: 10:02:00

I must abpologize - I found this one tough so I had to milk it for all it was worth - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 10:35:00

Abpolish doesn't have the snarky pejorative connotations. Yours is best! - skeeterzirra, 2007-09-20: 14:23:00

Sure was a tough one. Abfab Jab! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-20: 17:46:00

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Vexyoursize

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: veks yor syes

Sentence: When Vicki left Victor, he knew he had to vexyoursize and change his appearance in order to win her back or attract someone new. He tried diets, exercise and really could not afford surgery. Depressed he went into a bar to drown his sorrows. Feeling a little tipsy and slurring his words a bit, he stumbled home in the dark. He passed a church and decided to pray to the angels for a new look. He awoke the next day in the church and was stunned to see his reflection in a mirror. He looked worse! How could this be? At that point an old Irish Priest appeared at his side and said, "My son, you must be careful what you ask for when praying to the angels! Your speech was so slurred that they misunderstood you. You asked for a rose, instead of a new nose, so they gave you a big red one. You asked for a gin, instead of a new chin, so they gave you a double. You asked for bigger ears, they thought you said big arrears, so now you're broke. You asked for new hair, they thought you said a good scare, so now you have been neutered. You asked for new legs, they thought you said new pegs, so you can hobble home on two wooden ones. You asked for slimmer thighs, they thought you said dimmer eyes, so now you'll need strong glasses. You asked for a firm jaw, they thought you said a claw, so now you'll look talon-ted!"

Etymology: Vex (change the arrangement or position of;disturb the peace of mind of; afflict with mental agitation or distress) & Ex (former partner) & Your Size (body image, appearance) & exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit)

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Gympensate

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: jim-pen-sayt

Sentence: he looked in the mirror and decided then and there that he was going to gympensate like a crazy man

Etymology: gym, compensate

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Sadapt

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sad apt

Sentence: After his wife of 20 years dumped him for the pool boy,Kevin decided to enjoy himself and adapt a swinging bachelor lifestyle. His after-work beer therapy sessions gave him a much larger girth than before and his attempts to sadapt to the hedonistic life,made his fsvourite song, "The girls get prettier at closing time..."

Etymology: Sad (bad; unfortunate) & Adapt (make fit for, or change to suit a new purpose)

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Onthemakeover

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Rejexsery

Created by: WordSlammer

Pronunciation: Re-jeck-sir-ee

Sentence: The guy had Rejexsery after the divorce

Etymology:

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Metamorfailosis

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: metəmôrfāləsəs

Sentence: After his wife left, Bruce went on a gym spree. Fellow patrons knew him as big guy in the wet sweats. He expected a huge change. He experienced metamorfailosis. Caterpillar in. Caterpillar out.

Etymology: metamorphosis (a change of the form or nature of a thing or person into a completely different one) + Fail (be unsuccessful in achieving one’s goal)

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Modimagefy

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: mod-im-ij-fy

Sentence: Jeb shouldn't have modifmagefied his body to look like Britney, as she had also modimagefied herself to look like Madonna, but was unsuccessful.

Etymology: modify + image

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Expite

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: Ex-pite Just like it looks.

Sentence: Once the divorce was final they couldn't wait to to run into each other at the gym for a good dose of expite. Of course that didn't take too long since each was spending almost every spare moment there trying to make up for years of whocouldcareless marital workouts.

Etymology: Ex (former spouse) Spite (Nya Nya...)

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Spreen

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: SPREEN

Sentence: Harsh words from Roxie and a glance in the mirror was enough to spreen Bob into a strict dietary regimen and a strenuous fitness program. Furthermore, he planned to re-assessed his progress every September; it was, I guess, a personal "Spreenclean."

Etymology: Blend of SPURN & PREEN. Cognates: Spreenie .n; Spreeny adj.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-20: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by staggolee. Thank you staggolee! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-09-20: 17:44:00
Sure was a tough one. Abfab Jab!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-02: 00:07:00
Today's definition was suggested by staggolee. Thank you staggolee. ~ James