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'I need to feel sexy again! Give me Britney's abs!'

DEFINITION: v. intr., To compensate for emotional rejection by trying to change one's appearance through aggressive dieting, exercise and/or plastic surgery -- common among aging divorcees.

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Verboticisms

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Metadivorcesis

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: met/uh/di/vohrs/sis

Sentence: To get back in the game after his marriage fell apart, he had to go through a metadivorcesis to redefine himself physically, mentally and spiritually.

Etymology: METADIVORCESIS - from - METAMORPHOSIS (any complete change in appearance, character, or circumstances) + DIVORCE (total separation, or disunion)

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Vexyoursize

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: veks yor syes

Sentence: When Vicki left Victor, he knew he had to vexyoursize and change his appearance in order to win her back or attract someone new. He tried diets, exercise and really could not afford surgery. Depressed he went into a bar to drown his sorrows. Feeling a little tipsy and slurring his words a bit, he stumbled home in the dark. He passed a church and decided to pray to the angels for a new look. He awoke the next day in the church and was stunned to see his reflection in a mirror. He looked worse! How could this be? At that point an old Irish Priest appeared at his side and said, "My son, you must be careful what you ask for when praying to the angels! Your speech was so slurred that they misunderstood you. You asked for a rose, instead of a new nose, so they gave you a big red one. You asked for a gin, instead of a new chin, so they gave you a double. You asked for bigger ears, they thought you said big arrears, so now you're broke. You asked for new hair, they thought you said a good scare, so now you have been neutered. You asked for new legs, they thought you said new pegs, so you can hobble home on two wooden ones. You asked for slimmer thighs, they thought you said dimmer eyes, so now you'll need strong glasses. You asked for a firm jaw, they thought you said a claw, so now you'll look talon-ted!"

Etymology: Vex (change the arrangement or position of;disturb the peace of mind of; afflict with mental agitation or distress) & Ex (former partner) & Your Size (body image, appearance) & exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit)

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Makeoverreact

Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˈmeɪkoʊvəˌɹiækt/

Sentence: The reality show "If My Ex Could See Me Now" became very popular due to the disastrous makeoverreactions of its stars.

Etymology: makeover + overreact

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COMMENTS:

good one ErWenn - nice to see you're back - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 12:11:00

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Tartificialing

Created by: Scrumpy

Pronunciation: tahrt-uh-fish-uhl-ng

Sentence: Bill was tartificialing to impress Monica who was the new girl in the office. But Ken, a guy in the office, became suspicious of Bill's self improvement.

Etymology: tart - (garish,overdone ex. to tart up ones appearance.) + artificial + ing

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COMMENTS:

I wonder if he achieved that look with tartificial sweeteners - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 10:53:00

I hope Bill's not a tartificious tataram! (A foolish old man,esp one with sex on his mind- Rasta slang (1930) - OZZIEBOB, 2007-09-20: 17:51:00

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Mendorphins

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: men dohrr finns

Sentence: She started to feel good about herself after the first 10k, the mendorphins kicked in as she saw the guys in the mirror checking out her tush

Etymology: endorphins, mend, men

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Nipsuck

Created by: astorey

Pronunciation: nip-suk

Sentence: In a shameless effort to regain her mojo and show her ex(es) what they were missing, Vanessa went for the full nipsuck...from the "can't-stop-smiling facelift" to the drastic stomach stapling that kept her from eating anything on the many dinner dates she finagled through the ironically named www.divorcedandlovingit.com.

Etymology: Variation of nip and tuck.

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COMMENTS:

Four words! Hil Ar I Ous! - lumina, 2008-08-20: 15:20:00

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Transfigurize

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: tranz - FIG - yur - ize

Sentence: After a messy divorce with lots of criticism being aimed at his 'sagging' physique, Brandon decided it was time for him to transfigurize and to remold his body to a shape and condition he'd had many years earlier.

Etymology: Based on the word 'transfigure', (to change in outward form or appearance; transform)

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Divomorphosis

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: dih-va-mawr-fuh-sis

Sentence: It only took Larry a couple of weeks to end his marriage. The divomorphosis to a slim, trim date-ready dude is going to take a bit longer.

Etymology: divorce (split-up of marriage ) + metamorphosis (conversion, transformation )

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Victualizashun

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: vic/tu/al/i/zay/shun

Sentence: Harvey hoped that by aggressively embracing victualizashun he would once again possess the toned body he had been so proud of.

Etymology: victuals + shun + actualization

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COMMENTS:

Always wanted to use "victual" in one of my verbotomies. brings back memories of the 1960s and the "Beverley Hillbillies. " Nice word - OZZIEBOB, 2008-08-22: 05:03:00

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Gympensate

Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: jim-pen-sayt

Sentence: he looked in the mirror and decided then and there that he was going to gympensate like a crazy man

Etymology: gym, compensate

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-20: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by staggolee. Thank you staggolee! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-09-20: 17:44:00
Sure was a tough one. Abfab Jab!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-02: 00:07:00
Today's definition was suggested by staggolee. Thank you staggolee. ~ James