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'I need to feel sexy again! Give me Britney's abs!'

DEFINITION: v. intr., To compensate for emotional rejection by trying to change one's appearance through aggressive dieting, exercise and/or plastic surgery -- common among aging divorcees.

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Verboticisms

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Rebait

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: re bayt

Sentence: When Stanley Kupp went trawling for female companionship after his nasty divorce, he decided he needed to rebait the old Stanley hook to make himself look attractive. Alas, no amount of dieting, exercising, tanning or surgery could undo the 28 years' married toll on his former athletic shape. Time and again, he could hear that old play-by-play in his head..."He shoots, He doesn't score!"

Etymology: Re (to do again) & Bait (to lure, entice, or entrap)...wordplay on rebate (to get a little something back)

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Transfigurence

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: trans-FIG-yur-ence

Sentence: Following a messy divorce that included a great deal of harsh criticism about his 'sagging' appearance, Martin began a rigorous program of transfigurence, and finding a great deal of success with his efforts has become a real hunk and is in great demand in the dating game.

Etymology: Based on the word 'transfigure' (vt. transform outwardly and usually for the better)

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Emulateration

Created by: SethelMerman

Pronunciation: em-yoo-LATE-ur-a-shun

Sentence: "My emulateration is complete, should Cher stumble onstage, her tone-deaf back up dancer can step in and save the day. Where did I put my marbles? " ~Shar Bano, Backstage

Etymology: From (Emulate: to imitate to try to equal or excel) + (alteration: the state of being altered. Changed)

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Adonisize

Created by: ScrabbledEgg

Pronunciation: uh-DAH-ni-sighz

Sentence: Mid-life algebra lesson: 1 corporate downsize + 1 marital excise + 100's of drive thru Supersizes = time to Adonisize!

Etymology: Adonis, size, exercise

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Rejuvescape

Created by: lumina

Pronunciation: ree/joov/es/kape

Sentence: Once again Leo's friend's banded together for an intervention. After his last break-up they missed the warning signs. Sure enough they arrived at his apartment only find he had relapsed and was rejuvescaping again. It was a sad sight. Leo on the couch lost in a pile of exercise cd's, books, empty cans of Slim Fast, brochures for cosmetic procedures, and last but not least, a Thigh Master between his legs that they had to wrestle him for.

Etymology: Rejunvenate: Regenerate: return to life; get or give new life or energy. Escape: An inclination to retreat from unpleasant realities through diversion or fantasy.

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Bodification

hooterbug

Created by: hooterbug

Pronunciation: bä-də-fə-ˈkā-shən

Sentence: Gary's bodification didnt quite turn out as he expected. He thought that his skinny chicken legs had been one of the reasons his Ex-wife Marge wasn't attracted to him so he went in for some calf-implants. Unfortunately for Gary, the nurse misread his chart and Gary ended up with breast implants or "moobs" (man boobs)

Etymology: Blend of Body + Modification

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Bourneagain

Created by: porsche

Pronunciation: born/again

Sentence: He decided that the only solution to his lethargy was to sign up to the bourneagain program which guaranteed a body like Jason Bourne

Etymology: born again + Bourne

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Transformoron

MrDave2176

Created by: MrDave2176

Pronunciation: Trans-for-MOR-on

Sentence: Tom's mid-life crisis included a Ferrari, an iPhone, a new girlfriend and a transformoron into a man 10 years younger. Unfortunately Tom looked like a man ten years older.

Etymology: Transform + Moron

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Sadapt

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sad apt

Sentence: After his wife of 20 years dumped him for the pool boy,Kevin decided to enjoy himself and adapt a swinging bachelor lifestyle. His after-work beer therapy sessions gave him a much larger girth than before and his attempts to sadapt to the hedonistic life,made his fsvourite song, "The girls get prettier at closing time..."

Etymology: Sad (bad; unfortunate) & Adapt (make fit for, or change to suit a new purpose)

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Renaisensuate

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: Ree-nay-sen-shul-ate. Noun form: Renaisexual (a la Metrosexual, etc.)

Sentence: A glance in the mirror told Bob that he was hunkjunk: broad, bewigged and fifty, and greatly in need of a strict diet and a strenuous fitness regime to renaisensuate himself. Aucupation had been his pre-occupation, but now he had more feathered friends than fair ones. Perhaps, wondered Bob, would plastic surgery mould him into the renaisexual he longed to be?

Etymology: Blend of Renaissance: renewal, rebirth & sensual: pertaining to the body and physical senses & ate: suffix indicating action of person performing function. Aucupate:bird catching.

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COMMENTS:

I think Bob should use some common renaissense and opt for the good diet - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 11:24:00

Yikes!! sorry Ozziebob - I just realized you might be referring to yourself - hope I didn't insult you - Jabberwocky, 2007-09-20: 13:56:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-09-20: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by staggolee. Thank you staggolee! ~ James

OZZIEBOB - 2007-09-20: 17:44:00
Sure was a tough one. Abfab Jab!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2011-06-02: 00:07:00
Today's definition was suggested by staggolee. Thank you staggolee. ~ James