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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Urbean

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ur/bean

Sentence: John's attempt to be urbane, chivalrous, courteous, polite and just plain well-mannered became urbean when his head got jammed in the doorway helping a damsel in distress.

Etymology: URBEAN - noun - from URBANE (polite, refined and often elegant in manner) + MR. BEAN

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Chivnorant

Created by: MithrilShadow

Pronunciation: Shiv-noor-ant

Sentence: Mike's chivnorant attempt to hold the door open for his girl friend ended up with him pinned under the waiter cart, that came through the door right at that moment.

Etymology: from: Chivalry: gallant or distinguished gentlemen. And Ignorant: resulting from or showing lack of knowledge or intelligence

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Kinddesirity

Created by: greenbree

Pronunciation: ka/in/de/sai/ri/ti

Sentence: yesterday my boyfriend do a kindesirity thing, opening the door of the car for me.

Etymology: kind+desire

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Benefracture

Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: ben-uh-FRAK-cher

Sentence: Roxie was a tender-hearted tryplease, who sincerely shambled her way through life. And though her intentions remained pure and noble, her saintretemps and benefractures were often plain scary. In the end, to kin and kith alike, she became a must-to-avoid.

Etymology: Benefracture: blend of benefactor & fracture - " when good intentions comes apart or unstuck." Saintretemps: blend of saint & contretemps-"hitch"

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COMMENTS:

Sweet word OZZIEBOB! You long time-verbotomists are really creative with your words. For me, its hard to stay away from the thesaurus! - Kevcom, 2007-10-28: 00:23:00

I did this one time -- A female coworker dropped a paper by the printer and, trying to be gentlemanly, I quickly bent down to grab it (as she was also) and 'benefractured' her glasses. :/ - Tigger, 2007-11-06: 17:41:00

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Backsquire

Created by: mplsbohemian

Pronunciation: BAK-skwyre

Sentence: Alex, ever the backsquire, spread out his coat for his date to cross a puddle, only to put her in the way of the spray of a speeding car.

Etymology: backfire + squire (a gentleman)

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Majestiklutz

Created by: dredryder

Pronunciation:

Sentence: "It is a wonder he has any face left; he is so prone to majestiklution!"

Etymology: too obvious - "majestic" and "klutch" (a "klutz" who panics in a pinch)

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Dorkalert

Created by: kimbo123

Pronunciation: Dork-Alert

Sentence: Once again, she fell victim of a Dorkalert.

Etymology:

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Assistocramp

Created by: yellowbird

Pronunciation:

Sentence: That girl was so hot that I had an assistocramp and shut her purse in the car door.

Etymology: assistance + cramp

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Recomime

Created by: Kevcom

Pronunciation: rea-ko-meeme

Sentence: Danny shot a helpful recomime to the old lady waiting on the subway platform at Glencairn, Glencairn station, but was unfortunately left behind and delayed by the slowness of the old lady, and by the speed at which the doors open and close on the rocket.

Etymology: recoil + pantomime

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Galahadabooboo

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: gal-uh-had-uh-BOO-boo

Sentence: Once again, when Forrest made a very gallant attempt to rescue a lady in distress he had yet another galahadabooboo when he was trapped by the revolving door.

Etymology: Blend of 'Galahad' (knight and gentleman) and 'boo boo' (blunder)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James