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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Misstention

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: miss ten shun

Sentence: Leonard always meant well, but in his hurry to impress the fairer sex, his good deeds turned into the misstention kind. His awkward attempts at basic gallantry often came back to bite him. For instance, he tried to impress Mary Jane, the cute new receptionist by holding the revolving door open, only to get his head caught in it. Then when they got up to the office, he leaned on the wall to talk to her and set off the fire alarm. The final misstention was when he bought her a nice hot latte and accidently spilled it all over her new dress, computer keyboard and important report the boss was waiting on. Yes, sometimes the road to Hell is indeed paved with misstentions...

Etymology: Miss (fail to perceive or to catch with the senses or the mind;fail to reach or get to) & Intention (an act of intending; a volition that you intend to carry out;an anticipated outcome that is intended or that guides your planned actions)

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Chivnorant

Created by: MithrilShadow

Pronunciation: Shiv-noor-ant

Sentence: Mike's chivnorant attempt to hold the door open for his girl friend ended up with him pinned under the waiter cart, that came through the door right at that moment.

Etymology: from: Chivalry: gallant or distinguished gentlemen. And Ignorant: resulting from or showing lack of knowledge or intelligence

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Chivalreeeeeeek

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: shiv al reeeeeeeeeek

Sentence: his act of chivalry turned into an act of chivalreeeeeeeek. He won't try that again without checking his flies

Etymology: chivalry eeeeek

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Bungleman

Created by: Koekbroer

Pronunciation: bung-gil-min

Sentence:

Etymology: a contraction of "bungling gentleman"

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Zeable

Created by: KenM2

Pronunciation: zea-bull

Sentence: Nice zeabull you pulled back there, wonder if you should have offered to pick up the old lady you dropped while helping her to cross the street.

Etymology: Zeal+Stumble

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Jobole

Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: JA-BOWL

Sentence: As Dan had been planning for months, he finally decided to take his chance when suddenly he got his neck caught in the dore, all the while while jaboling Diane.

Etymology:

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Jesture

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: jest chur

Sentence: While trying to impress Inga on their first date, Jeremy used all his polite charms to ensure she thought him a true gentleman. Allowing her to go first buit trying to stay with her, he got caught in the fast moving doorway. Although his intention was good, his attention was not and he got caught in the door. "Son of a gun", she thought. "His jesture proved to me that he does not know how to handle a revolver. I guess he is not quite of the calibre I thought he should be".

Etymology: Jest (act in a funny or teasing way;activity characterized by good humor)& Gesture ( something done as an indication of intention;show, express or direct through movement)

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Chivalgaffe

Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: shiv-uh l-gaf

Sentence: Robert commited a chivalgaffe when he closed the car door on his dates leg.

Etymology: ME: chivalrie + F: gaffe

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COMMENTS:

Also chivalwrong - milorush, 2007-10-26: 09:24:00

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Benevoloser

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bənevəloōzər

Sentence: Despite his illusions, Charley is a benevoloser. When Cindy broke up with her boyfriend he envisioned himself as her knight in shining armor. He had her over for a gourmet meal where he started by spilling wine on her and ended by tripping and knocking her off her chair. Instead of sweeping her off her feet and winning her heart, he knocked her to the floor and sat on her spleen.

Etymology: benevolent (well meaning and kindly) + loser (failure)

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Assuccour

zxvasdf

Created by: zxvasdf

Pronunciation: assuc cour

Sentence: Fred saw his crush and in his dash to be chivalrous he committed a dastardly assuccour. Fred finds himself in the middle of an assuccouring just about everyday; an assuccouring Fred is in his element. Fred doesn't feel right about his day if he hasn't had assuccoured at least once. Assuccourism is sweeping the country as closet geeks finally venture from monitor light to seek adventure and love.

Etymology: Ass (a fool) & succour (to assist)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James