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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Fewtility

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyoo til lit tee

Sentence: Fewbert's heroic gestures towards his fewture wife, Fewgenia, were often attempts in fewtility. Like when he placed his coat over a puddle in the street for her, only to discover that it actually covered an open manhole. Or when he chased her cat FewFew through hill & dale, caught it, was scratched to death and brought it home to her, only to find the real FewFew happily sitting in front of the hearth at home. Poor Fewbert, his fewtile efforts made Fewgenia think that a fewture with Fewbert might be fewtile, at least until after he passed fewberty.

Etymology: Few (an indefinite but relatively small number) & Futility (uselessness as a consequence of having no practical result)

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COMMENTS:

Beware the fewmious bandersnatch.... - Mustang, 2008-09-25: 00:02:00

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Negehelp

Entombor2

Created by: Entombor2

Pronunciation: negg eyy help

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Chivalgaffe

Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: shiv-uh l-gaf

Sentence: Robert commited a chivalgaffe when he closed the car door on his dates leg.

Etymology: ME: chivalrie + F: gaffe

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COMMENTS:

Also chivalwrong - milorush, 2007-10-26: 09:24:00

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Polchumpite

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: puhl-chuhmp-ahyt

Sentence: He wanted to offer his sobbing co-worker a tissue, and as he fumbled around to fetch one he mistakenly handed her his used up snot-ridden one thus adding himself to the roster of office polchumpites.

Etymology: polite + chump (as in oaf, klutz))

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Assuccour

zxvasdf

Created by: zxvasdf

Pronunciation: assuc cour

Sentence: Fred saw his crush and in his dash to be chivalrous he committed a dastardly assuccour. Fred finds himself in the middle of an assuccouring just about everyday; an assuccouring Fred is in his element. Fred doesn't feel right about his day if he hasn't had assuccoured at least once. Assuccourism is sweeping the country as closet geeks finally venture from monitor light to seek adventure and love.

Etymology: Ass (a fool) & succour (to assist)

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Benevoloser

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bənevəloōzər

Sentence: Despite his illusions, Charley is a benevoloser. When Cindy broke up with her boyfriend he envisioned himself as her knight in shining armor. He had her over for a gourmet meal where he started by spilling wine on her and ended by tripping and knocking her off her chair. Instead of sweeping her off her feet and winning her heart, he knocked her to the floor and sat on her spleen.

Etymology: benevolent (well meaning and kindly) + loser (failure)

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Clumsyhurl

vmalcolm

Created by: vmalcolm

Pronunciation: /'klʌmzihɜ:rl/

Sentence: In an attempt to be a gentleman, poor Harry ended up committing an act of clumsyhurl...

Etymology: CLUMSYHURL. From Clumsy + Hurl

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Chivnorant

Created by: MithrilShadow

Pronunciation: Shiv-noor-ant

Sentence: Mike's chivnorant attempt to hold the door open for his girl friend ended up with him pinned under the waiter cart, that came through the door right at that moment.

Etymology: from: Chivalry: gallant or distinguished gentlemen. And Ignorant: resulting from or showing lack of knowledge or intelligence

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Chivalwreck

Created by: QuantumMechanic

Pronunciation: shi val rek

Sentence: I tried to help the old lady across the street, but I was a complete chivalwreck when I got my foot run over, and she dropped her groceries.

Etymology: Chivalry + Wreck

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Gallahadabooboo

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Gallahad-ah-boo boo

Sentence: No knight in shining armor, Harvey committed a gallahadabooboo when he introduced his new bride as his 'first wife'.

Etymology: The gallant Sir Gallahad + boo boo or 'blunder'

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COMMENTS:

Good effort- harvey's no galahad more a galah! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-28: 02:30:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James