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'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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Benevoloser

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: bənevəloōzər

Sentence: Despite his illusions, Charley is a benevoloser. When Cindy broke up with her boyfriend he envisioned himself as her knight in shining armor. He had her over for a gourmet meal where he started by spilling wine on her and ended by tripping and knocking her off her chair. Instead of sweeping her off her feet and winning her heart, he knocked her to the floor and sat on her spleen.

Etymology: benevolent (well meaning and kindly) + loser (failure)

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Backsquire

Created by: mplsbohemian

Pronunciation: BAK-skwyre

Sentence: Alex, ever the backsquire, spread out his coat for his date to cross a puddle, only to put her in the way of the spray of a speeding car.

Etymology: backfire + squire (a gentleman)

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Fauxcilitation

Created by: milorush

Pronunciation: (n.) fō-sĭl'ĭ-tā'shən; (tr. v.) fō-sĭl'ĭ-tāt'

Sentence: Henri's poor reflexes and terrible eyesight usually turn his eager attempts to help his friends into nightmarish and dangerous moments of fauxcilitation which usually finish up at the local emergency room.

Etymology: Faux = from faux pas = blunder + [fac]ilitation = The act of making easy or easier.

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COMMENTS:

A shade of meaning might include a subconscious lack of desire to actually help out, which might lead to a purposeful poor or "fake" ("faux") effort to assist. - milorush, 2007-10-26: 07:04:00

A shade of meaning might include a subconscious lack of desire to actually help out, which might lead to a purposefully poor or "fake" ("faux") effort to assist. - milorush, 2007-10-26: 07:05:00

Interesting and good blend! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-28: 02:28:00

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Missistance

Created by: mustkeepsanity

Pronunciation: mis-sis-tans

Sentence: When Cindy dropped her pencil Fred bent down to pick it up for her. The problem was that Cindy also bent to get it, and Fred ended up headbutting her in the nose. He's since learned not to offer his missistance to others.

Etymology: miss+assistance miss (To fail to accomplish or achieve) assistance (Aid, help)

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Floormeetface

Created by: vasunlover

Pronunciation:

Sentence: I went to open the door for him, and by golly, oops, floormeetface.

Etymology:

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Banevolence

MrDave2176

Created by: MrDave2176

Pronunciation: bain-ehv-oh-lence

Sentence: Thomas' banevolence was beginning to cost him. The proliferation of cuts, bruises and trips to the chiropractor was making him think that chivalry was going to get him dead.

Etymology: bane + (ben)evolence

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COMMENTS:

libertybelle Terrific word! - libertybelle, 2007-10-26: 11:10:00

good word MrDave - Jabberwocky, 2007-10-26: 12:19:00

Good word and antonym of benevolence! - OZZIEBOB, 2007-10-28: 02:25:00

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Bungleman

Created by: Koekbroer

Pronunciation: bung-gil-min

Sentence:

Etymology: a contraction of "bungling gentleman"

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Adversassisty

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: ad/vurs/assist/ee

Sentence: My well meaning offer of assistance quickly turned into an adversassisty as I slipped on the ice trying to help an elderly lady across the street. She fractured her hip and I bruised my ego.

Etymology: assist + Adverse (harmful, injurious) + adversity (mishap, misfortune)

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COMMENTS:

zxvasdf Ha Ha! I'd bruise my ego and shatter my own hip as well. - zxvasdf, 2008-09-24: 19:25:00

I like it:flows nicely. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-09-25: 18:19:00

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Galahadabooboo

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: gal-uh-had-uh-BOO-boo

Sentence: Once again, when Forrest made a very gallant attempt to rescue a lady in distress he had yet another galahadabooboo when he was trapped by the revolving door.

Etymology: Blend of 'Galahad' (knight and gentleman) and 'boo boo' (blunder)

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Chivalgaffe

Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: shiv-uh l-gaf

Sentence: Robert commited a chivalgaffe when he closed the car door on his dates leg.

Etymology: ME: chivalrie + F: gaffe

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COMMENTS:

Also chivalwrong - milorush, 2007-10-26: 09:24:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James