Vote for the best verboticism.

'Let me hold the door for you...'

DEFINITION: n., A gallant gesture which does not produce the desired effect because of poor execution. v., To offer a small gesture of assistance, which backfires as you trip over your own kind intentions.

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Verboticisms

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You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.

Polchumpite

Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: puhl-chuhmp-ahyt

Sentence: He wanted to offer his sobbing co-worker a tissue, and as he fumbled around to fetch one he mistakenly handed her his used up snot-ridden one thus adding himself to the roster of office polchumpites.

Etymology: polite + chump (as in oaf, klutz))

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Urbean

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ur/bean

Sentence: John's attempt to be urbane, chivalrous, courteous, polite and just plain well-mannered became urbean when his head got jammed in the doorway helping a damsel in distress.

Etymology: urbane + Mr. Bean

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COMMENTS:

Would never have thought to go down the Mr. Bean road. Great word! - purpleartichokes, 2007-10-26: 19:01:00

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Fewtility

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyoo til lit tee

Sentence: Fewbert's heroic gestures towards his fewture wife, Fewgenia, were often attempts in fewtility. Like when he placed his coat over a puddle in the street for her, only to discover that it actually covered an open manhole. Or when he chased her cat FewFew through hill & dale, caught it, was scratched to death and brought it home to her, only to find the real FewFew happily sitting in front of the hearth at home. Poor Fewbert, his fewtile efforts made Fewgenia think that a fewture with Fewbert might be fewtile, at least until after he passed fewberty.

Etymology: Few (an indefinite but relatively small number) & Futility (uselessness as a consequence of having no practical result)

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COMMENTS:

Beware the fewmious bandersnatch.... - Mustang, 2008-09-25: 00:02:00

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Graciouch

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: grāshəouch

Sentence: Tim likes to play the role of a knight in shining armor. Instead, his klutziness often leaves him as a knight with a shiner.

Etymology: gracious (courteous, kind, and pleasant) + ouch (exclamation used to express pain)

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Floormeetface

Created by: vasunlover

Pronunciation:

Sentence: I went to open the door for him, and by golly, oops, floormeetface.

Etymology:

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Mannerd

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: man-nerd

Sentence: Even though Sal was a brilliant rocket scientist, he was totally inept in social situations, especially when it came to his approach to women. In his dreams he was dashing, witty and chivalrous, but the reality was that he was well-mannerd because his attempts to be polite and helpful were so awkward.

Etymology: mannered (well) polite, courteous + nerd: socially inept

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Urbean

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: ur/bean

Sentence: John's attempt to be urbane, chivalrous, courteous, polite and just plain well-mannered became urbean when his head got jammed in the doorway helping a damsel in distress.

Etymology: URBEAN - noun - from URBANE (polite, refined and often elegant in manner) + MR. BEAN

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COMMENTS:

Very clever - OZZIEBOB, 2008-09-25: 18:22:00

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Hurteous

Created by: bzav1

Pronunciation: rhymes with courteous

Sentence: Jeff's clumsy attempts to avoid the impedestrian, led to several hurteous acts. He had no intention of being nonsiderate.

Etymology: impedestrian - one that walks very slowly down the middle of the sidewalk nonsiderate - antonym for considerate

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COMMENTS:

good one! - remistram, 2007-10-26: 09:22:00

MrDave2176 This is a good word...sounds like it feels. - MrDave2176, 2007-10-26: 13:06:00

way to times 'er by 3! - Kevcom, 2007-10-28: 17:20:00

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Assistocramp

Created by: yellowbird

Pronunciation:

Sentence: That girl was so hot that I had an assistocramp and shut her purse in the car door.

Etymology: assistance + cramp

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Behalfgaffe

Created by: Wordfanne

Pronunciation:

Sentence: When Roland stood up to allow a pregnant, fellow-bus-rider his seat, his behalfgaffe of stepping on another woman's skirt hem, pulling its waist to her knees, rather nullified his desired "effect".

Etymology:

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 00:30:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-26: 04:21:00
After you. No after you. No after you. No after yooooooeeeeouwwww!

Kevcom - 2007-10-26: 07:38:00
Awesome cartoon James! That is so funny - I was almost dyin' of laughter of the expression on the guys face...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 10:05:00
Thanks to Kevcom and Petaj for your hurteous thoughts and magnanimistakian clobbergestures ~ James

Lidipop - 2007-10-26: 10:19:00
I actually printed this one out...it's so good, well done!!!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-26: 17:46:00
We must not forget to thank ErWenn again for his generous courteslip. ~ James

purpleartichokes - 2007-10-26: 18:57:00
Yes, thank you ErWenn and James. Fabulous contributions from you two!

yellowbird - 2008-09-24: 11:49:00
Haven't we seen this definition before?

petaj - 2008-09-26: 04:19:00
Yep - looking forward to some new ones

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-23: 00:10:00
Today's definition was suggested by ErWenn. Thank you ErWenn. ~ James