Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A type of frustration created by a manager who never notices when you work late, but always nags you for leaving early whenever you leave on time. v. To carefully monitor your subordinates to ensure that they never leave work a minute early.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Chronologre
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: kruh-nol-oh-ger
Sentence: Cindy's boss can be a real chronologre when he wants to be. He acts like you are stealing from him personally if you clock out even a minute early. Maybe if he had the skill or drive to do something really useful life would be different.
Etymology: chronology (the arrangement of dates, events, etc, in order of occurrence) + ogre (a monstrously ugly, cruel, or barbarous person)
Timebeing
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: tīmbēing
Sentence: Tom works for the timebeing. That timebeing is his boss. It doesn't seem to matter how much he gets done or that he arrives early and skips lunch, closing time is closing time. Tom and his boss do a mental minute waltz as 5 o'clock approaches. The fact that the boss's office is aligned with the hallway Tom uses for his escape makes him seem something like a troll guarding a bridge.
Etymology: time (the indefinite continued progress of existence and events in the past, present, and future) + being (a real or imaginary living creature)
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COMMENTS:
very cerebral - bookowl, 2009-06-16: 16:46:00
creepy - mrskellyscl, 2009-06-16: 16:55:00
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Hourgrass
Created by: Jabberwocky
Pronunciation: our/grass
Sentence: Stan was the company hourgrass and would tattle on anyone who took a minute longer for coffee breaks or lunch. He had a special alarm that would sound if the door was opened before 5:00 p.m.
Etymology: hour glass + grass (as in tattle)
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COMMENTS:
Stan sounds like a grasshole! - Nosila, 2009-06-16: 10:48:00
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Latekeeper
Created by: artr
Pronunciation: lātkēpər
Sentence: The rule at Jill’s office is to calculate time cards in 15-minute increments. What that often means is that her boss, will engage her in a conversation for 14 minutes past her scheduled work day. The other trick that this latekeeper will employ is to wait until he hears the click of the time clock to exit his office to ask for a progress report on her various projects.
Etymology: late (doing something or taking place after the expected, proper, or usual time) + gatekeeper (a person or thing that controls access to something)
Obeywatch
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: o bay weatch
Sentence: Mr.Smedley fancied himself a dedicated disciple of the obeywatch old school of management. He decided that those employees who had the misfortune to report to him were not to be trusted with important things like personal time management. Far too often they let their personal lives get in the way of being at work. Imagine calling in sick and failing to come in just because you broke a leg or had minor surgery, like an appendicitis. Where was the loyalty these days? So what if there were days they worked for 12 hours straight and other days when the work flow slowed down? He still expected them to be there 9 to 5, without exception. He positioned his desk near the time clocks, so no one could sneak out past him. He recorded all these indiscretions in a black book. Needless to say, morale was at an all time low and fuses were getting shorter at such treatment. One of these days, someone would go postal and punch out his time clock permanently!
Etymology: obey (be obedient to) & watch (a purposeful surveillance to guard or observe;a small portable timepiece;a person employed to watch for something to happen) & Baywatch(you know,that show, where Hoff says, "Hey we gotta save that guy!" and Pamela goes boing, boing, boing running down the beach after him carrying that red thing...)
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COMMENTS:
That's hard to beat - petaj, 2008-04-23: 02:50:00
I guess the "mean" in 'GMT' meant everything to him! Very clever. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-04-23: 06:25:00
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Stimie
Created by: karenanne
Pronunciation: STY mee
Sentence: Early on in his new job, Ernest made the mistake of working late every day to catch up and to prove himself, thinking that would place him in the boss's good favor. Instead, it means that the boss, who himself doesn't usually hit the office until 10 am, has now forgotten Ernest's actual contract hours and assumes he will always be there until 7 pm. So now when Ernest decides to leave on time (5 pm) to actually spend time with his family, he is stimied at every turn by the boss's obvious disapproval. The boss likes to do such things as staring pointedly at his watch, sighing loudly and saying, "I guess I'll have to stay and finish things by myself tonight since there won't be anyone here to help," and making comments about how "people who are team players will the ones to keep their jobs when cuts are made." The funny thing is, Ernest has actually begun to feel guilty and acts apologetic as he is leaving (on time).
Etymology: time + stymie (to frustrate, hinder, or thwart)
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COMMENTS:
Truer words never spoken... - Nosila, 2010-06-29: 19:25:00
My first thought was "clocksucker" but then I figured I had already put in my share of vulgarity a couple of months ago with "dicktionary," "motherducker," and "bitchnessperson."
- karenanne, 2010-06-29: 19:40:00
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Taskmasterror
Created by: Tigger
Pronunciation: /task-mas-TER-or/
Sentence: Ruth worked late four days out of the week, but she would sometimes have to leave early to pick up her daughter from daycare. On those days her boss, Mr. Petty, would make snide remarks if he saw her getting ready to leave, and she always had a feeling of taskmasterror that he was keeping track of every time she left work early and keeping it in her personnel file.
Etymology: Taskmaster - a person who supervises rigorously the work of others (from Middle English, taske "imposed work, tax" & Old English, magister "great") + Terror - intense, overpowering fear (from Latin, terrēre "to frighten")
Slackervise
Created by: stache
Pronunciation: slak'-ər-vīz'
Sentence: Fred's secretary Ethel had arrived seventy-seven seconds past her forty-minute allotted lunch period, so Fred made sure to slackervise even more diligently than usual to insure she made up the time at actual work before leaving for the evening; at her claimed typing speed of 110 wpm, that should work out to an extra 141.16667 words for the day.
Etymology: 'slacker,' less taut; 'vise,' device for holding objects firmly in place.
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COMMENTS:
Nice word! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-04-23: 17:50:00
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Clockblock
Created by: scissorlips
Pronunciation: klahk-blahk
Sentence: Emily was frequently at work well past closing time, finishing loose ends, making up time that was perhaps wasted by her co-workers. However, Fred, her boss, was always right there; a serious pain-in-the-butt that knew nothing of her week and clockblocked her just because she wanted to beat rush hour on Friday.
Etymology: Blocking progress based on a mutually visible clock.
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COMMENTS:
mad props - daniellegeorge, 2008-04-24: 13:18:00
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Ticcompoop
Created by: jrogan
Pronunciation: tik-com-poop
Sentence: My boss is a real ticcompoop. He even has a ticcompooter to calculate how may seconds we spend in the washroom.
Etymology: tick + nimcompoop
Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
stache - 2008-04-23: 22:10:00
slackervisor looks a little like hank hill.
daniellegeorge - 2008-04-24: 13:17:00
clockblock is genius
- 2008-07-27: 19:30:00
nice words
bob - 2008-07-27: 22:57:00
nice stuff!
wordmeister - 2008-07-27: 23:43:00
Timely words today
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James
Where is everybody today? Vacations galore?
monkey88 - 2011-11-18: 01:36:00