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'Computer programmers do not make mistakes.'

DEFINITION: n. A computer programmer who corrects software problems by bugging the users, rather than debugging the software. v. To pinpoint the blame for any defects in a product, especially a software product which you have created, on "illogical" end-users.

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Verboticisms

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Progrimist

Created by: arrrteest

Pronunciation: pro-grim-ist

Sentence: Victor the Progrimist was scheduled to do his rounds on the floor at 10:00 a.m. on Tuesdays. The employees all held a meeting to discuss what problems they had beforehand so they would be prepared for his sarcastic and abusive ways and attitude. They even took a poll to see who's problem would probably attract the most ire and ridicule from him. Every once in a while they would concoct a fake IT problem just to see him react if there was not many issues to discuss.

Etymology: Program + grim +ist

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Dikoder

Kallystie

Created by: Kallystie

Pronunciation: dik-oder

Sentence: Richard was berating Sally for crashing his flawless program. She insisted that it was not user-error, and that there had to be an issue with the code. He continued to be petulant, and finally Sally said, "Hey, stop being such a dikoder Richard!"

Etymology: Possibly a combination of British army slang for "male appendage" circa 1891 and the latin "codex", or book of laws.

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Theebugger

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: dee buh gur

Sentence: Verily I say unto thee, if yon bugger of a theebugger shouldst approach thee, flee with the greatest urgency, lest he bug thee further.

Etymology: debug, bugger, thee

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COMMENTS:

your sentences always make me laugh - Jabberwocky, 2008-05-14: 14:07:00

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Geekbugger

Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: geek - bug - grrr

Sentence: Milton employed his own type of debugging....Instead of spending the arduous hours analyzing, tweaking and rerunning code to locate the errors in his software program; he tried to talk the users into living with it. He even acted as if they were somehow not using it correctly or just being troublesome. The users felt like Milton was the worst geekbugger they had ever met.

Etymology: debug (locate and correct errors in a computer program code), geek (An expert in a technical field, particularly to do with computers),bug (annoy, irritate; also a fault) bugger (a general-purpose expletive, used to imply dissatisfaction, or used to describe someone or something whose behaviour is in some way displeasing)

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Culpabiligeek

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kulp a bili geek

Sentence: Michael was a culpabiligeek. Being a computer programmer elevated him to godly status in his own mind. Whenever a help call came in, he would sigh loudly,reluctantly step down from the sanctity of Mount Olympus (his dark hole of an office, where he lived in his own cyber universe) and deign to visit the offender. These mortal morons were always doing something stupid with their computers and he loved nothing better than blaming them for everything. And they were so stupid, they believed him. One day, he met his match. His company had hired a sassy girl with long blond hair and thick glasses called Phoebe to share his office and duties. He soon fell in love and married her, celebrating his own Big Fat Geek Wedding. Alas, it did not last long, as she too, tired of taking the blame for everything that went wrong. She ran off with a janitor named Mario and Michael was forced to live his own Geek Tragedy.

Etymology: culpability (deserving blame or censure as being wrong or evil or injurious) & geek ( a person with an unusual or odd personality;an expert in a technical field, particularly to do with computers)

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COMMENTS:

My favorite! Best describes the person I have to deal with. Thanks, Nosila. - purpleartichokes, 2008-05-14: 19:29:00

Cheers,purple, and welcome back...we missed you! - Nosila, 2008-05-14: 20:55:00

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Technoway

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: tek-no-way

Sentence: The office staff all called Hubert the tech 'technoway' for the way he tried to dismiss just about every service call by saying 'no way is this a computer error, it's operator error'.

Etymology: blend of technician and the phrase 'no way'

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COMMENTS:

artr Nice combo! - artr, 2009-06-26: 10:58:00

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Userabuser

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: use/er/a/buse/er

Sentence: Our IT department specializes in the userabuser technique to solve most computer problems. It's the "It's got to be you' approach.

Etymology: user + abuse

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COMMENTS:

Must be included in their tech training classes... - Nosila, 2009-06-26: 12:37:00

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Dissinformation

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: disinfərmāshən

Sentence: Lawrence is quite sure of his programming skills. When something doesn’t work the way he expects, he is preemptively sure that it is caused by user error. He has been known to spread dissinformation, belittling anyone who would dare question his skills.

Etymology: diss (act or speak in a disrespectful way toward)+ misinformation (false or inaccurate information, esp. that which is deliberately intended to deceive)

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Techsuppose

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: tek-sup-pose

Sentence: Jean hated to call Techsuppose. Not only would it take half the day to reach someone, but the smarmy voice on the other end of the phone assumed that she was an imbecile and asked the same stupid questions, "Is it plugged in?" "Did you restart it?" Eventually, she discovered that someone neglected to use the "Mother-May-I" command during set-up and now she'd have to spend the rest of the afternoon downloading various patches, drivers, upgrades and fixes. Another day sacrificed to the tyrannical techgods.

Etymology: (play on techsupport) Suppose: to believe, especially on uncertain or tentative grounds; to consider as probable or likely

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COMMENTS:

So true! - splendiction, 2009-06-26: 22:53:00

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Itsk

mrskellyscl

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: I-tisk

Sentence: When Susan's screen went black she dreaded having to call the crabby ITsk guy but she was stymied. The all-knowing geek strolled into the office with his short sleeved shirt, coffee cup and smarmy attitude, looked at the wall where someone had accdentally kicked out the plug. He stood there with the plug in his hand, tsking, then made a huge show of plugging it in. "Please check the plug before you call next time," he snarled, and wafted out of the office.

Etymology: IT: pronounced I - T is the acronym for Informational Technologist + Tsk: sucking sound used to express disappointment or sympathy.

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-05-14: 00:03:02
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-06-26: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by purpleartichokes. Thank you purpleartichokes. ~ James

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