Verboticisms

Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: tek-sup-pose

Sentence: Jean hated to call Techsuppose. Not only would it take half the day to reach someone, but the smarmy voice on the other end of the phone assumed that she was an imbecile and asked the same stupid questions, "Is it plugged in?" "Did you restart it?" Eventually, she discovered that someone neglected to use the "Mother-May-I" command during set-up and now she'd have to spend the rest of the afternoon downloading various patches, drivers, upgrades and fixes. Another day sacrificed to the tyrannical techgods.

Etymology: (play on techsupport) Suppose: to believe, especially on uncertain or tentative grounds; to consider as probable or likely

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COMMENTS:

So true! - splendiction, 2009-06-26: 22:53:00

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Created by: rombus

Pronunciation: dee - bug - ah - boo

Sentence: It was an exasperating debugaboo that the employees found themselves in. The front end application sometimes connected and sometimes did not. The programmer kept saying that the users were just not concentrating or had a bad work attitude when they could not connect.

Etymology: debug, bugaboo (source of concern, trickster or prankster)

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COMMENTS:

Dee Bootiful word! - Nosila, 2009-06-26: 12:41:00

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Created by: rebelvin

Pronunciation: CUSTOmer+CULPable+ATE

Sentence: His first reaction to any reported application problem is to custoculpate, not wanting to think the code could be incorrect, even when that has proven to be the case over and over.

Etymology: CUSTOmer+CULPable+ATE

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: poe grom mer

Sentence: Gerd the Nerd, King of the Keys, WiFi Art Thou was on his usual grumpy morning rounds. It was always demeaning for a man of his superior intellect and obvious supreme being status to have to help the peons in data entry sort their miniscule problems. And so he conducted his morning pogrommer act, successfully designed to terrify and cower. But when he deigned to enter the murky waters of the call centre, he was blinded by the beauty of the end-user. She had long gold plaits and looked so helpless and vulnerable, so he went gently on her. He found himself thinking of her all day and dreamed that night that his Big Fat Geek Wedding would soon be a reality.

Etymology: Pogrom (organized persecution of an ethnic group, in this case, blonde end-users) & Programmer (a person who designs and writes and tests computer programs)

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: tek-no-way

Sentence: The office staff all called Hubert the tech 'technoway' for the way he tried to dismiss just about every service call by saying 'no way is this a computer error, it's operator error'.

Etymology: blend of technician and the phrase 'no way'

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COMMENTS:

Nice combo! - artr, 2009-06-26: 10:58:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kulp a bili geek

Sentence: Michael was a culpabiligeek. Being a computer programmer elevated him to godly status in his own mind. Whenever a help call came in, he would sigh loudly,reluctantly step down from the sanctity of Mount Olympus (his dark hole of an office, where he lived in his own cyber universe) and deign to visit the offender. These mortal morons were always doing something stupid with their computers and he loved nothing better than blaming them for everything. And they were so stupid, they believed him. One day, he met his match. His company had hired a sassy girl with long blond hair and thick glasses called Phoebe to share his office and duties. He soon fell in love and married her, celebrating his own Big Fat Geek Wedding. Alas, it did not last long, as she too, tired of taking the blame for everything that went wrong. She ran off with a janitor named Mario and Michael was forced to live his own Geek Tragedy.

Etymology: culpability (deserving blame or censure as being wrong or evil or injurious) & geek ( a person with an unusual or odd personality;an expert in a technical field, particularly to do with computers)

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COMMENTS:

My favorite! Best describes the person I have to deal with. Thanks, Nosila. - purpleartichokes, 2008-05-14: 19:29:00

Cheers,purple, and welcome back...we missed you! - Nosila, 2008-05-14: 20:55:00

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Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: soft ware spesh ial ass

Sentence: Hank's new income tax software’s many glitches prompted him to call technical support. However, the softwarespecialass maintained his program was flawless. He suggested Hank give the software another try while completing another random task, such as juggling oranges or counting sheep.

Etymology: From software specialist and ass.

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Created by: Kallystie

Pronunciation: dik-oder

Sentence: Richard was berating Sally for crashing his flawless program. She insisted that it was not user-error, and that there had to be an issue with the code. He continued to be petulant, and finally Sally said, "Hey, stop being such a dikoder Richard!"

Etymology: Possibly a combination of British army slang for "male appendage" circa 1891 and the latin "codex", or book of laws.

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: nin/com/pute/abul

Sentence: Our IT department always makes me feel like a nincomputable.

Etymology: nincompoop + computable

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Krit-ee-komp-a-doss

Sentence: The criticompados was insistent that the blame lay with me, but I was sure I was not in the wrong, and he knew it!! He tried the same trick on my colleague only last week.

Etymology: Criti(Critisize,blame) comp(computer) dos(Disk operating system)

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