Verboticisms

Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: jak-grahm-mer

Sentence: In the Teacher's Room, out of her hearing, of course, the red-haired English teacher was referred to as "The Jackgrammar." Even the Physics teacher, a man of few words and much substance, laughed out loud at the label. The barrage of her daily correction was intolerable. Her red pen not only marked her students papers, but the notice board ("final grade's due on...") , the photocopy machine ("put xtra paper here.."), the Principle's (sic) suggestion box. Little did the teachers know that her boyfriend was a tattoo artist and that underneath her long-sleeved blouses, on the skin of her left forearm (unseen in the drawing), was a red and blue heart and the words, "Luv Conquers All."

Etymology: A play on "jackhammer," a pneumatic tool for breaking pavement and drilling rock.

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COMMENTS:

Laughed all the way through the sentence. Luv the way the etymology implies such people hit us like a hammar and break us. - silveryaspen, 2009-01-16: 10:08:00

Good one! - Nosila, 2009-01-16: 20:46:00

This one's destined to be a classic. - metrohumanx, 2009-01-21: 15:34:00

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| Comments and Points

Created by: verbherder

Pronunciation: gram-ahrs-hohl

Sentence: I don't mind someone pointing out an error in speech every now and then, but that grammarsehole did it throughout the entire meeting and we couldn't get anything accomplished.

Etymology:

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COMMENTS:

I like it! Too bad I already used my votes... - readerwriter, 2009-01-16: 12:24:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sin taxi der mist

Sentence: Lynn Gwistik was secretly known as Marian the Grammarian. She was a stickler for correct grammar. She was neither passive nor active, but always very tense. When she fell in love with the object of her desire, Jerry Und, she knew he was not perfect and she would have to try and modify him, because he was such an onomatopoeian. He had prepositioned her and when their ellipsis met, he was superlative. But we all know that love is of a transitive nature and when she tired of his dangling modifiers, her clause came out and she attempted a ligature on him. Jerry had not known that Lynn was a syntaxidermist before she had tried to have him mounted on her trophy wall with her other antecedents. Thanks to his testimony, she is serving an indefinite,run-on, compound sentence for her crimes.

Etymology: Syntax (the grammatical arrangement of words in sentences; studies of the rules for forming admissible sentences;a systematic orderly arrangement & Taxidermist (a craftsman who stuffs and mounts the skins of animals for display)

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COMMENTS:

That was a lot of thought on your part - very clever! I voted for yours but forgot to sign in first. - karenanne, 2010-06-02: 15:49:00

I count 18 grammatical references, plus the two punny names. - karenanne, 2010-06-02: 15:51:00

They call me the Queen of the Pundra...what can I say? - Nosila, 2010-06-03: 00:11:00

SO - you are on the site at 11 min. past midnight - THAT'S how you do it. Most of your REM sleep is probably spent on dreaming up words and sentences for Verbotomy! - karenanne, 2010-06-03: 19:37:00

Oh, that's right - I forgot you are on Mountain Standard Time, so it was only 10:11 pm for you. - karenanne, 2010-06-04: 19:17:00

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| Comments and Points

Created by: kashman

Pronunciation: gram-o-poop

Sentence: Alicia's act of gramopooping every sentence spoken by her mismatched boyfriend Billy Bob was fully justified in her heard; she had a Master's degree in English Language, while poor Billy Bob never even completed his high school education. Even though Alicia was the biggest ever gramopoop Billy has come across, he knew that's the highest level of intellectual dating chain he will ever get, so he kept hoping for Alicia's "gramonstipation".

Etymology: Grammar + Poop (slang for a person regarded as spoiler/fun destroyer).

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COMMENTS:

"Gramonstipation"! Oh, that takes the cake! No pun intended. - diyan627, 2008-03-26: 03:45:00

It seems that Billy Bob knew all about the "dative case" - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-26: 17:54:00

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| Comments and Points

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: gramerkraker

Sentence: James hates e-mail, not for its intrusive nature but the way most people use it. Worse yet is text messaging. (He refuses to call it texting) When someone sends him a message, he replies with a corrected edition of the original message with commas, hyphens, spelling and proper verb tense. He won't respond to the content until the originator sends it back in its corrected form. His friends have started calling him a grammarcracker. He is amused by the term but won't actually type it because it isn't in the dictionary.

Etymology: grammar (the whole system and structure of a language) + cracker (a fine example of something)

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COMMENTS:

I h8 txtn 2. - wayoffcenter, 2009-01-16: 04:46:00

And a very nice play on graham crackers! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-16: 10:12:00

Show them no Grammercy! - Nosila, 2009-01-16: 20:44:00

Those purists can really contaminate our ebonics. - metrohumanx, 2009-01-21: 15:35:00

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| Comments and Points

Created by: diyan627

Pronunciation: gram-a-mend

Sentence: Rohit was a grammamend I couldn't date, much less tolerate in any setting. So what? -I meant "couldn't bear it" rather than "couldn't bare it". He corrected me in the instant messenger, and my replying with "Ahh" was not good enough. He went on to say that he can't stand people who can't handle criticism, and he thinks I'm petty. He wouldn't move on until I cyber-bowed down before him and thanked him for putting me on the right path. Quite bizarre. At first I didn't mind the correction at all..It didn't even phase me.. It was his insistence for recognition of his brilliance that was the clincher! And he actually thought I'd go out with him for a first-meet after that.

Etymology: grammar + amend

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COMMENTS:

Sounds like a true story. [By the way, you mixed verb tenses in one of your sentences. — Yours Truly, Rohit] Just kidding, diyan. - Tigger, 2008-03-26: 23:10:00

Don't worry. I'm not your [hopefully fictional] linguistalker. - Tigger, 2008-03-26: 23:15:00

Tigger, "linguistalker" is correct! The linguadventure is a true tale. hahaha... And he did keep calling me and IMing me after that one, but I linguiblocked him. - diyan627, 2008-03-27: 11:48:00

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| Comments and Points

Created by: mercury258

Pronunciation: gram-you-scribe

Sentence: Jenna: Where'd you go to? My water broke and I need a ride to the hospital! Sarah: I think you mean to say, "To where did you go?" Jenna: Quit grammuscribing me and give me a ride!

Etymology: From Grammar and to Prescribe

| Comments and Points

Created by: silveryaspen

Pronunciation: Rek ti fy

Sentence: Killsay was excellent at morphemes and constituents. He was born a Grammar. Killsay was very in tense, and always in the accusative. He was overly generous in sharing his grammar. Killsay would restruckture the speecch of any one. No was was safe from his guydance (guidance) ... shuffling his feet, waving his finger, tweaking your verbose, nitpicking through one's words ... he would wrectify everything said.

Etymology: RECTIFY, WRECK. RECTIFY - correct, amend, revise. WRECK - to damage and destroy with too much revision. --- (Morphemes are basic word-building units. Constituents are sentence-building units. They are true grammatical words, not verbotomies.) Killsay Grammar is a pun on actor Kelsey Grammer, star of the tv show Frasier.

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COMMENTS:

Bet she had a bad rectutation.... - Mustang, 2009-01-16: 04:17:00

After she irritates enough people, she might turn a wreckluse. - mweinmann, 2009-01-16: 08:12:00

Thank you for the clever comments. But Killsay is a he ... not a she! Men are guilty of doing this, too! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-16: 10:03:00

nice - Jabberwocky, 2009-01-16: 16:16:00

Killsay Grammar...love it! - Nosila, 2009-01-16: 20:43:00

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| Comments and Points

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: pedd ant

Sentence: emma was a pedaunt, she took after her gramma

Etymology: pedant, aunt

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COMMENTS:

it's all relative...good one! - Nosila, 2010-06-02: 23:43:00

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| Comments and Points

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: werd - zill - uh

Sentence: Brunhilda was a stickler for grammar and had become a veritable wordzilla at parsing every one of Geoffrey's utterings.

Etymology: Blend of word and Godzilla

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COMMENTS:

I parse on this one. Good blend. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-26: 17:39:00

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