Vote for the best verboticism.
DEFINITION: n. A person who constantly corrects other people's grammar. v. To habitually correct the grammar of everyone with whom you speak regardless of the social context or the minuteness the perceived error.
Verboticisms
Click on each verboticism to read the sentences created by the Verbotomy writers, and to see your voting options...
You have two votes. Click on the words to read the details, then vote your favorite.
Syntaxassessor
Created by: Nosila
Pronunciation: sin taks as ses sor
Sentence: Comma Chameleon found her mark in her new boyfriend, Colon. Although he came from good parenttheses, was very dashing, earned a high income bracket and had a hyphenated name, his English skills were dreadful. Although his Grammar had taught him well, Comma found she had to edit everything he said. She became his syntaxassessor and if it were not for the fact that he had a cute asterisk and was great at the old interrobang, she would have put a bullet beside his name before now. It did not hurt that he punctuated his wedding proposal with a large caret diamond ring...
Etymology: Syntax ( the grammatical arrangement of words in sentences) & Wordplay on Tax Assessor (an official who evaluates property for the purpose of taxing it)
Wordprefect
Created by: OZZIEBOB
Pronunciation: wurd-PREE-fekt
Sentence: "But this is madness. I am trying to stop this company from becoming a grammatical graveyard! Don't you realize it concerns every person in this country - and, moreover, in the greater part of the world to speak English perfectly" Behind his back, in a low voice, someone murmured, " Oh no, has someone split an infinitive again." Things were becoming tense as Bob, flushing crimson, started to leave the room. After few moments, someone said, "Hope that's the last of "Verndracula" for a while. "Verndracula", "Dipthong", "Cretaphor" and, quasi-officially, "The Wordprefect" were but a few pejoratives for Bob, whose habitual correcting of even the slightest grammatical error was driving his colleagues to demential declensia. However, they agreed, that it was a "critical period" in the company's history, and that it would be a "double negative" if they sat there tangentiality, and did nothing to put a "glottal stop" to his psycholinguistic punishment. Firstly they started to mutilate plurals, one boomerang became two "beemearang"; one cuckoo was two "cuckee". And, in an attempt, to render this onomatopedant almost apoplexic: 'Boo-hoo' became "bee-hee" and "boom" became "beem" Reaching for the mountain top of malapropisms, they uttered howlers such as a "let's not talk about tattoo subjects". Gradually, Bob began to realize that he had lost all "soap in his hole" when he began to slip, more and more, into spoonerisms - of course, that should be speenerism.
Etymology: Blend of WORD & PREFECT: School boy,especially in English Grammar schools, with responsibility for th discipline and "proper" behavior of other students.
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COMMENTS:
There's nothing like clouding up the waters with a good mixed metaphor, ya know! - arrrteest, 2008-03-26: 12:04:00
excellent sentence - Jabberwocky, 2008-03-26: 14:00:00
So many hysterical stories today! Very amusing. - Tigger, 2008-03-26: 22:29:00
Loved it...it left me almost comma-tose. Period. Doesn't a dipthong sound like the kind of low-cut bathing suit that Borat wore? Isn't a beemerang a carphone call for a yuppie? Cheers!(Is the singular form of that a cher?) - Nosila, 2008-03-26: 22:40:00
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Pedaunt
Created by: galwaywegian
Pronunciation: pedd ant
Sentence: Hilary , a complete pedaunt, had driven all of her nephews to totally reject education with her "little chats"
Etymology: pedant, aunt
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COMMENTS:
pedant - how nicely arcane... :) - otherguy, 2009-01-16: 04:50:00
Exceptional. Perfectly fits the definition. - silveryaspen, 2009-01-16: 09:34:00
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Grammuscribe
Created by: mercury258
Pronunciation: gram-you-scribe
Sentence: Jenna: Where'd you go to? My water broke and I need a ride to the hospital! Sarah: I think you mean to say, "To where did you go?" Jenna: Quit grammuscribing me and give me a ride!
Etymology: From Grammar and to Prescribe
Linguisbitch
Created by: kateinkorea
Pronunciation: lin GWIS bitch
Sentence: I am sick and tired of her linguisbitch, annoying behaviour.
Etymology: LINGUISTICS: connected with language BITCH: complain
Lexactitude
Created by: karenanne
Pronunciation: lek ZAK tih tood
Sentence: Lexie's constant correcting of what everyone was saying was really wearing thin. I told her I was chomping at the bit to get out of there because I found her lexactitude so annoying, and she responded, "Actually, it's 'champing at the bit,' not 'chomping.'" I told her something she could chomp as I was leaving.
Etymology: lex- (prefix meaning "word") + exactitude
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COMMENTS:
Lexie...love it! - Nosila, 2010-06-02: 23:41:00
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Englishmajor
Created by: Biscotti
Pronunciation: in-glish-may-jor
Sentence: Alex really took his englishmajorism over the top when he tried to convince people they were speaking with the wrong form of the word (too, two, to).
Etymology: english (a language many people speak) + major (the main course of study at a 4 year university or college)
Jackgrammar
Created by: readerwriter
Pronunciation: jak-grahm-mer
Sentence: In the Teacher's Room, out of her hearing, of course, the red-haired English teacher was referred to as "The Jackgrammar." Even the Physics teacher, a man of few words and much substance, laughed out loud at the label. The barrage of her daily correction was intolerable. Her red pen not only marked her students papers, but the notice board ("final grade's due on...") , the photocopy machine ("put xtra paper here.."), the Principle's (sic) suggestion box. Little did the teachers know that her boyfriend was a tattoo artist and that underneath her long-sleeved blouses, on the skin of her left forearm (unseen in the drawing), was a red and blue heart and the words, "Luv Conquers All."
Etymology: A play on "jackhammer," a pneumatic tool for breaking pavement and drilling rock.
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COMMENTS:
Laughed all the way through the sentence. Luv the way the etymology implies such people hit us like a hammar and break us. - silveryaspen, 2009-01-16: 10:08:00
Good one! - Nosila, 2009-01-16: 20:46:00
This one's destined to be a classic. - metrohumanx, 2009-01-21: 15:34:00
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Grammamend
Created by: diyan627
Pronunciation: gram-a-mend
Sentence: Rohit was a grammamend I couldn't date, much less tolerate in any setting. So what? -I meant "couldn't bear it" rather than "couldn't bare it". He corrected me in the instant messenger, and my replying with "Ahh" was not good enough. He went on to say that he can't stand people who can't handle criticism, and he thinks I'm petty. He wouldn't move on until I cyber-bowed down before him and thanked him for putting me on the right path. Quite bizarre. At first I didn't mind the correction at all..It didn't even phase me.. It was his insistence for recognition of his brilliance that was the clincher! And he actually thought I'd go out with him for a first-meet after that.
Etymology: grammar + amend
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COMMENTS:
Sounds like a true story. [By the way, you mixed verb tenses in one of your sentences. — Yours Truly, Rohit] Just kidding, diyan. - Tigger, 2008-03-26: 23:10:00
Don't worry. I'm not your [hopefully fictional] linguistalker. - Tigger, 2008-03-26: 23:15:00
Tigger, "linguistalker" is correct! The linguadventure is a true tale. hahaha... And he did keep calling me and IMing me after that one, but I linguiblocked him. - diyan627, 2008-03-27: 11:48:00
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Speakrighter
Created by: purpleartichokes
Pronunciation: speek-rite-ur
Sentence: It's, like, impossible to talk at Mary. Always correcting me, she is. She's a speakrighter determined to make me speak righter.
Etymology: speak, right, speech writer
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COMMENTS:
Dylan Thomas said, 'British broadcasters speak as if they had Elgin's marbles in their mouth," - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-26: 17:36:00
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Comments:
Today's definition was suggested by stache. Thank you stache. ~ James
stache - 2008-03-26: 09:16:00
You're welcome, JG. Very worthy submissions today
doseydotes - 2008-03-26: 09:22:00
I'm afraid stache's definition is in reference to yours truly. I looked at the suggested words and I'm floored. I might as well give up right now. Great job, everybody.
doseydotes - 2008-03-26: 10:53:00
And I gotta add, "Man, you loving bestest ever!" to my repertoire.
stache - 2008-03-26: 11:47:00
That'd be hoovy of you, 'dotes.
Yes, there are lots of gramudgeons and linguweenies here. Apparently, they're the bestest! ~ James
Today's definition was suggested by stache. Thank you stache. ~ James
KatrinaNhor - 2018-06-02: 07:46:00
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