Verboticisms

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: Mc/Job/i/mize

Sentence: To be even considered for the position at Dollarama, Joe had to McJobimize his resume leaving everything out that he did since high school.

Etymology: McJobimize - verb - from McJob (a none descript low paying job such as a burger server, or store greeter) + minimize (to represent at the lowest possible amount)

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: dee/ny/I/grate

Sentence: In these tough economic times the only way I could get a job at the local McDonalds was to denyigreat, which was difficult because I am.

Etymology: deny + I + great + denigrate (disparage)

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Created by: readerwriter

Pronunciation: cellf-eh-fak-ting

Sentence: Downey Outman was so selfeffacting on his resume the Human Resources Manager, Noah Job, could hardly bear (or is it bare?) to read the words printed by hand on the soft double-ply tissues.

Etymology: A play on SELFEFFACING, humble or modest using FACT, knowledge or information based on real occurances

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COMMENTS:

very funny - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:41:00

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Created by: matte76

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Bob was splinterviewing for the fry cook job since there was nothing else available. The 60-year olds' resume had obviously been splinterviewed to increase its' appeal.

Etymology:

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: dis-con-job-yu-LAY-shun

Sentence: With no possible chance to find another job in his highly specialized field, Alexander found it necessary to apply for jobs he once considered beneath himself and found a little disconjobulation was necessary in order to 'qualify' for such menial positions.

Etymology: A play on the word discombobulation, or discombobulate (To throw into a state of confusion)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: jentrēlevəl

Sentence: When Prince Gustuv found that the family fortune was not what it once was, it became clear that he would have to find a way to make some money. There are few jobs earmarked for the nobility so it looked he would have to downplay his rank and take a (gasp!) gentrylevel position. The interviewer tried hard to not burst out laughing when he saw "formerly know as Prince" on the resume.

Etymology: gentry (the class of people next below the nobility in position and birth) + level (a height or distance from the ground or another stated or understood base) play on entry-level

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COMMENTS:

superb - Jabberwocky, 2009-02-25: 14:40:00

Very good, and it made me laugh! - kateinkorea, 2009-02-26: 20:11:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: coor rik yu lum bee day

Sentence: His curriculum vitae read more like it had been made into a curriculumbidet...all the most recent events on his resume had been whitewashed and changed as though they never had happened or had not as much impact as one would have thought. When the recruiter asked him what skills he brought to the job of a waiter, Dubya as he was known for short, thought hard and long about it before responding. Okay, 10 seconds. "Well, I am good at taking orders from my Mom, Dad and Wife; I know how to run up a large tab; I can recommend Rice as a staple in any regime;Iraq up tips; I am good at nonsensical banter and if we get real busy, my two burly friends, who speak into their cufflinks, can lend a hand."

Etymology: Rhymes with Curriculum Vitae (a summary of your academic and work history) & Bidet (a basin for washing genitals and anal area)

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COMMENTS:

You are queen of the delightful denouement! His-tor-ically Funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:11:00

Make that His-story-cally funny! - silveryaspen, 2009-02-25: 02:12:00

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: rez you mey noht

Sentence: her resumaynot neglected to mention any of her achievements since high school apart from the mose killing stuff

Etymology: resume may not

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: non kom plish ments

Sentence: When Bank Manager Mr. Drysdale applied at the fast food restaurant for a part-time job, his resume was full of noncomplishments. His interest in the job was on account of the fact that he'd lost a lot in his bank retirement savings plan. The Assistant Manager who interviewed him after he deposited his application did not trust his resume. It was a wicket lie he knew, but he could hardly teller the truth. He had worked at a Sperm Bank...

Etymology: Non (negative, not at all) & Accomplishments (achievements, qualifications, abilities acquired by training)

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Created by: FreakyDeak

Pronunciation: Down-pay

Sentence:

Etymology: Downplay + pay

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