Verboticisms

Created by: Osmosis

Pronunciation:

Sentence: After the Wishbone salad dressing exploding on her, Mary became enraged at being the latest screwictim of her husband's pranks.

Etymology: Screw + victim

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COMMENTS:

Typo: should be "exploded" instead of "exploding" - Osmosis, 2007-10-23: 22:06:00

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Created by: mrskellyscl

Pronunciation: sal-ad-mes-sing

Sentence: Jim, a perpetual five year old, played one too many practical jokes on his wife when he fixed the lid on the salad dressing, what he called saladmessing, so that it would completely ruin her new sweater. She packed her bags, and handed him a letter from her lawyer. "How's that for closure," she asked before slamming the door.

Etymology: wordplay on salad dressing -- salad + messing: to mess around with or make a mess

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COMMENTS:

nice - galwaywegian, 2010-02-18: 07:12:00

like it...don't mess with the dressing! - Nosila, 2010-02-18: 17:22:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: vin eh ree gret

Sentence: Lettuce reinact the crime. Rosie Roquefort had gone to the fridge cos she wanted to romaine slim by eating a healthy salad. She combined the vegetable ingredients and tossed them into the salad bowl. She retraced her steps back to the fridge to get a bottle of salad dressing. From the array in the door, she pondered whether to pick Paul Newman or something more Krafty as her choy-ce, checking for expiry dates. She picked a bottle of vinaigrette and took it over to shake and pour over her salad. Only she had picked a bottle of vinairegrette instead... because when she tried to shake it, the entire contents of the full bottle sprayed all over her, her kitchen and everything in it. The Usual Suspect, her husband, Basil Roguefort came to mind. Her suspicions were confirmed when she spotted him rolling on the dining room floor with laughter and the video camera in his hand. The beet cobbs would turnip later when she caught Basil and tried to artichoke him. The CSI(Criminal Salad Investigators) measured the spatter patterns and chard the trajectories. Basil was collard when his fingerprints were found all over the bottle and lid of the dressing. He was charged with bottle-ism, a rare form of vandalism involving bottles. Rosie was charged with attempted manslawter. When the case came to court, Rosie beet the wrap because the vegetarian judge thought she got a raw deal. The judge tossed out the salad case, as there was mushroom for doubt. Rosie was later featured on the Okra Winfrey show and has now optioned her life story in a book called "Salad Days"...she will never have to earn a celery again. Basil romaines in custody where he has found Judaism and plans to become a kohlrabi.

Etymology: Vinaigrette (a salad dressing with oil and vinegar as well as mustard and garlic) & Regret (sadness associated with some wrong done or some disappointment)

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Created by: Chickp

Pronunciation: Cap/splatter

Sentence: The lid was just loose enough that I was kapsplattered with Thousand Island Dressing when I shoke the bottle

Etymology: Cap+splatter

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Created by: thebaron

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Once again, he pseudosealed the salad dressing, so that when she picked it up, it spilled all over her blouse.

Etymology: pseudo (fake/false) seal (to cover)

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Created by: CDH167

Pronunciation: vinn-uh-gress

Sentence: "My roommate short-sheeted my bed and set my alarm clock two hours early, so I'll get back by vinaigressing her new bottle of Catalina."

Etymology: Portmanteau from 'vinaigrette' and 'aggressive'.

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Created by: kimbo123

Pronunciation: Ha-spewed you

Sentence: She fell again for the Haspewedu bottle.

Etymology:

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Created by: leechdude

Pronunciation: cap-foon

Sentence: Susan put the glass ranch dressing in a capfoon way which resulted in having to call a maid.

Etymology: cap (lid), foon (just made it up)

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Created by: lawlore

Pronunciation: flid-l

Sentence: I loved my girlfriend, but she had so many annoying habits. I got so sick of her fliddling every time we went out to dinner- she thought it was sooooo funny, but I think she just had shares in my dry cleaners.

Etymology: Portmanteau of fiddle (v., in the sense of "to interfere or play with") and lid (n., the top of a container)

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Created by: lawvol

Pronunciation: Slippt-ôh-lidd

Sentence: Jake was careful to sliptolid the bottle such that his roommate was unaware that something was afoot with the "Ken's Steak House Ranch Dressing".

Etymology: Slipped Lid

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