Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: vin eh ree gret

Sentence: Lettuce reinact the crime. Rosie Roquefort had gone to the fridge cos she wanted to romaine slim by eating a healthy salad. She combined the vegetable ingredients and tossed them into the salad bowl. She retraced her steps back to the fridge to get a bottle of salad dressing. From the array in the door, she pondered whether to pick Paul Newman or something more Krafty as her choy-ce, checking for expiry dates. She picked a bottle of vinaigrette and took it over to shake and pour over her salad. Only she had picked a bottle of vinairegrette instead... because when she tried to shake it, the entire contents of the full bottle sprayed all over her, her kitchen and everything in it. The Usual Suspect, her husband, Basil Roguefort came to mind. Her suspicions were confirmed when she spotted him rolling on the dining room floor with laughter and the video camera in his hand. The beet cobbs would turnip later when she caught Basil and tried to artichoke him. The CSI(Criminal Salad Investigators) measured the spatter patterns and chard the trajectories. Basil was collard when his fingerprints were found all over the bottle and lid of the dressing. He was charged with bottle-ism, a rare form of vandalism involving bottles. Rosie was charged with attempted manslawter. When the case came to court, Rosie beet the wrap because the vegetarian judge thought she got a raw deal. The judge tossed out the salad case, as there was mushroom for doubt. Rosie was later featured on the Okra Winfrey show and has now optioned her life story in a book called "Salad Days"...she will never have to earn a celery again. Basil romaines in custody where he has found Judaism and plans to become a kohlrabi.

Etymology: Vinaigrette (a salad dressing with oil and vinegar as well as mustard and garlic) & Regret (sadness associated with some wrong done or some disappointment)

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Created by: pungineer

Pronunciation: Shoe/ken/froy/duh

Sentence: Part of the Nazis' dastardly masterplan to conquer America during WW2 was to spread confusion and terror across the land by recruiting waitresses to act as Shookenfreuders

Etymology: Shook (as in all shook up) + Schadenfreude (to take pleasure in the misfortunes of others mwah ha ha ha etc)

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COMMENTS:

now that's clever!! - libertybelle, 2007-10-23: 09:14:00

Thanks, i'm liking yours too, sounds more exciting than a caesar salad somehow.. - pungineer, 2007-10-23: 09:19:00

Thanks, i'm liking yours too, sounds more exciting than a caesar salad somehow.. - pungineer, 2007-10-23: 09:26:00

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: condiment

Sentence: Doris's mother-in-law loved to poke around in the fridge whenever she came to visit. She would pull out all the sauce and dressings bottles, giving them a firm shake and peering at the use by dates before exclaiming loudly to embarrass Doris, when she found an old one. This time, Doris had a cunning plan to thwart the old biddy. Her fridge was now full of connedements - at the first shake, her mother-in-law was sure to get a face full of thousand island dressing, fish sauce or aioli.

Etymology: conned (subject to a confidence trick) + dement (to cause someone to lose their faculties) + condiment (accompaniments for your food)

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COMMENTS:

Hey Petaj - welcome back!! Great word today - Jabberwocky, 2008-09-19: 09:25:00

Good one! - Mustang, 2008-09-19: 17:13:00

Welcome back...my connedeplements on your word! - Nosila, 2008-09-19: 20:08:00

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Created by: vmalcolm

Pronunciation: /dretl/

Sentence: He has drettled this bottle again! How many times will I have to deal with this drettle?!?!

Etymology: DRETTLE. v. tr/ n From Dressing + Throttle

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Fly-ing-sors-ur

Sentence: When Susan shook the ketchup bottle she realised that her dear husband, aka 'The Joker' had rigged the bottle so that it turned into a flyingsauceugh, sending the whole contents flying through the air landing straight in her face. She vowed to get her own back one day when he was least expecting it, if only she could think of a plan mean enough.

Etymology: Flying(to travel through the air) + Sauce(a thick liquid to add to food to improve the flavour) + Ugh(Used to express something unpleasant) = Flyingsauceugh

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COMMENTS:

very funny - Jabberwocky, 2008-09-19: 09:26:00

Gets my vote for sure! I could NOT think of anything on this one! - lumina, 2008-09-19: 18:04:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Lo-bottle-me

Sentence: When she shook the catsup bottle the lid flew off, catsup slattered her forehead giving her a frontal lobottlemee

Etymology: Lobotomy + bottle

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: dee-CAP-lyd-tayt

Sentence: With perverse joy, Lucinda would secretly decaplidtate various salad dressing bottles in the fridge and would wait for some hapless soul to shake them and would squeal with delight at the messy outcome.

Etymology: Blend of 'decapitate' (remove the head of a person or critter) and 'lid' (cap or top for a container)

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Created by: Osmosis

Pronunciation:

Sentence: After the Wishbone salad dressing exploding on her, Mary became enraged at being the latest screwictim of her husband's pranks.

Etymology: Screw + victim

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COMMENTS:

Typo: should be "exploded" instead of "exploding" - Osmosis, 2007-10-23: 22:06:00

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Created by: bzav1

Pronunciation: vin - regret

Sentence: The manager was of the opinion that because the vinregrette was unintentional, the restaurant was not responsible for the dry cleaning of Debbie's blouse.

Etymology: vinaigrette + regret

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Created by: thebaron

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Once again, he pseudosealed the salad dressing, so that when she picked it up, it spilled all over her blouse.

Etymology: pseudo (fake/false) seal (to cover)

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