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'Oh no! I hate it when my husband tries to dress me!'

DEFINITION: v., To carefully place a lid on a bottle, especially a salad dressing bottle, so that it appears closed and will not spill unless the bottle is moved or shaken. n., A bottle which has been prepared in such a manner.

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Verboticisms

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Lobottlemee

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Lo-bottle-me

Sentence: When she shook the catsup bottle the lid flew off, catsup slattered her forehead giving her a frontal lobottlemee

Etymology: Lobotomy + bottle

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Condimark

MrDave2176

Created by: MrDave2176

Pronunciation: CON-de-mark / tom-FOOD-er-ee

Sentence: Kevin was often the condimark of such tomfoodery as the loose salt shaker or the mustard in the ketchup bottle.

Etymology: condiment+mark (the target of malice) / tomfoolery + food.

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Vinregrette

Created by: bzav1

Pronunciation: vin - regret

Sentence: The manager was of the opinion that because the vinregrette was unintentional, the restaurant was not responsible for the dry cleaning of Debbie's blouse.

Etymology: vinaigrette + regret

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Vinairegrette

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: vin eh ree gret

Sentence: Lettuce reinact the crime. Rosie Roquefort had gone to the fridge cos she wanted to romaine slim by eating a healthy salad. She combined the vegetable ingredients and tossed them into the salad bowl. She retraced her steps back to the fridge to get a bottle of salad dressing. From the array in the door, she pondered whether to pick Paul Newman or something more Krafty as her choy-ce, checking for expiry dates. She picked a bottle of vinaigrette and took it over to shake and pour over her salad. Only she had picked a bottle of vinairegrette instead... because when she tried to shake it, the entire contents of the full bottle sprayed all over her, her kitchen and everything in it. The Usual Suspect, her husband, Basil Roguefort came to mind. Her suspicions were confirmed when she spotted him rolling on the dining room floor with laughter and the video camera in his hand. The beet cobbs would turnip later when she caught Basil and tried to artichoke him. The CSI(Criminal Salad Investigators) measured the spatter patterns and chard the trajectories. Basil was collard when his fingerprints were found all over the bottle and lid of the dressing. He was charged with bottle-ism, a rare form of vandalism involving bottles. Rosie was charged with attempted manslawter. When the case came to court, Rosie beet the wrap because the vegetarian judge thought she got a raw deal. The judge tossed out the salad case, as there was mushroom for doubt. Rosie was later featured on the Okra Winfrey show and has now optioned her life story in a book called "Salad Days"...she will never have to earn a celery again. Basil romaines in custody where he has found Judaism and plans to become a kohlrabi.

Etymology: Vinaigrette (a salad dressing with oil and vinegar as well as mustard and garlic) & Regret (sadness associated with some wrong done or some disappointment)

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Shookenfreude

Created by: pungineer

Pronunciation: Shoe/ken/froy/duh

Sentence: Part of the Nazis' dastardly masterplan to conquer America during WW2 was to spread confusion and terror across the land by recruiting waitresses to act as Shookenfreuders

Etymology: Shook (as in all shook up) + Schadenfreude (to take pleasure in the misfortunes of others mwah ha ha ha etc)

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COMMENTS:

libertybelle now that's clever!! - libertybelle, 2007-10-23: 09:14:00

Thanks, i'm liking yours too, sounds more exciting than a caesar salad somehow.. - pungineer, 2007-10-23: 09:19:00

Thanks, i'm liking yours too, sounds more exciting than a caesar salad somehow.. - pungineer, 2007-10-23: 09:26:00

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Lidlizard

Created by: looseball

Pronunciation:

Sentence: ok who's the lidlizard? This stuff is going to stain my favorite table cloth.

Etymology:

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Heinzed

Created by: wordslikevenom

Pronunciation: Hi-nzzzz'd (something like that)

Sentence: Shaking the bottle, Lilly was about to taste the 58th variety ... SPLAT! She'd been Heinzed.

Etymology: Heinz - The sauce manufacturer

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Haspewedu

Created by: kimbo123

Pronunciation: Ha-spewed you

Sentence: She fell again for the Haspewedu bottle.

Etymology:

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Screwictim

Created by: Osmosis

Pronunciation:

Sentence: After the Wishbone salad dressing exploding on her, Mary became enraged at being the latest screwictim of her husband's pranks.

Etymology: Screw + victim

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COMMENTS:

Typo: should be "exploded" instead of "exploding" - Osmosis, 2007-10-23: 22:06:00

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Fliddle

Created by: lawlore

Pronunciation: flid-l

Sentence: I loved my girlfriend, but she had so many annoying habits. I got so sick of her fliddling every time we went out to dinner- she thought it was sooooo funny, but I think she just had shares in my dry cleaners.

Etymology: Portmanteau of fiddle (v., in the sense of "to interfere or play with") and lid (n., the top of a container)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-23: 02:57:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram! ~ James

petaj petaj - 2007-10-23: 08:19:00
Definitely Krafty behaviour!

remistram - 2007-10-23: 09:52:00
I had to marry the loose lidder...I'm a shake first, tight lidder thus the birth of this definition.

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-10-23: 10:19:00
Time to throttle the bottler? ~ James

galwaywegian - 2008-09-19: 06:29:00

galwaywegian - 2008-09-19: 06:30:00
very high standard so far today!

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-02-18: 00:36:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James