Verboticisms

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: pat-rih-bull-dree

Sentence: Dear Mr. Silverstein, I'm writing to you today concerning the behavior of your son, Andrew Dice, in my morning kindergarten class. He has become somewhat of a distraction to the class, and I have to question whether or not he is being exposed to the proper developmental tools at home. His sense of humor is overly mature for a class of this level, and I don't think it would be inaccurate to state that he has the vocabulary of a longshoreman. When asked to share his favorite nursery rhyme in class the other day, he recited a profane perversion of "Jack and Jill". He laughs alound whenever someone mentions playing with balls at recess, or I chastise a member of the class for eating paste. I caught a member of the class a week ago giving herself a haircut with the safety shears, and Andrew suggested that she use them for a "Brazillian". He routinely pulls the covers off of female members of the class during nap time, throws a handful of change at them, and tells them "you gotta get outta here". Whether patribaldry is to blame or some other member of your family has instilled these poor behaviors, this must be corrected, or we will have no other option but to remove your child from our school. Sincerely, Mrs. Abagail Trenton, Sunny Heights Grade School

Etymology: patri - of the father, ribaldry - obscene or improper behavior

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COMMENTS:

Nice word and story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-02-26: 16:13:00

Cringed over the sentence. Great word! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 19:18:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: kon/trer/giv/er

Sentence: "Every time I'm left with that @%&dam !@#$%&* contrargiver brother of yours, I come back with !@#$%&* awful language like this," lamented Fudgy, my beloved parakeet.

Etymology: contrary + caregiver

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COMMENTS:

Great etymology! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 19:28:00

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Created by: drewsky

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Created by: dochanne

Pronunciation: Cust owe dee um

Sentence: Daniel sighed in relief to be home. The month-long work trip had incultivated various nasty habits he planned to exorcise, but first poor George had to be retrieved from the neighbour. The bird seemed happy to see him, hopping up and down, flapping it's wings. "Farqueue!" said the bird. "Farqueue!Farqueue!" And Daniel just stared. Beside him sniggered the teenage son, responsible no doubt for this true cusstodium, his parrot no longer suitable for nursing home visits.

Etymology: Cuss - to use naughty words; Custodian - caretaker; Odium - obnoxious thing. Naughty obnxious words acquired from one's caretaker.

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Created by: nickmarziani

Pronunciation: Neg-lah-dance

Sentence: Karen, look at the neglidance little Susie is doing. Your bastard brother must have let her watch MTV again.

Etymology: Negligence + Dance, of course.

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Created by: logarithm

Pronunciation: kluhk-kE-tu-wa

Sentence:

Etymology: 1) Cluck: the sound made by a hen (as in calling her chicks) 2) Kakaktua or 'cockatoo': from the Malay name for these birds, kaka(k)tua (either from kaka "parrot" + tuwah, or "older sister" from kakak "sister" + tua, "old").

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COMMENTS:

Alternative spelling: 'Cluckatoo'. - logarithm, 2008-12-11: 00:03:00

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Created by: ddove60

Pronunciation: u mor upt

Sentence: "If uncle Mike umorupts one more child in this house, he will not be welcome for next weeks Nascar race."

Etymology: Humor + Corrupt

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: petz - tuh - didj - ih - tay -shun

Sentence: While keeping his brother in law Morton's favorite hunting dog while Morton was on vacation, Myron resorted to some underhanded petstidigitation to teach the old dog a couple new and socially unacceptable tricks.

Etymology: blend of pet and prestidigitation (sleight of hand or ('trick')

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COMMENTS:

Petty good! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 18:58:00

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Created by: CanadianAndyCapp

Pronunciation: Mal-a-sit-ter-ism

Sentence: Despite all precautions and checking, one cannot totally avoid the possibility that a child will pick up a malasitterism from the babysitter.

Etymology: Mal- Bad / Sitter- Part-time caregiver / ism- habit or manner

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COMMENTS:

Especially if the baby sitter is Mrs. Malaprop! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 18:59:00

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Created by: XMbIPb

Pronunciation: /zo-o-tard/ (note: each of the “o”s is a distinct sound as in “zoology,” for example; /zu-tard/ is INcorrect)

Sentence: Q. “Can you believe it?! We left our pet beagle with my idiot brother-in-law for a mere fortnight and that zootard taught it how to leg-hump anyone who sits in my favourite recliner!” A. “What’s so strange about that? I thought all dogs leg-hump?” Q. “Male dogs do. But Betsy’s a bitch!”

Etymology: zoo – fr. Greek for “animal” -tard – a slang root derived from the word “retard”

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