Verboticisms

Created by: XMbIPb

Pronunciation: /zo-o-tard/ (note: each of the “o”s is a distinct sound as in “zoology,” for example; /zu-tard/ is INcorrect)

Sentence: Q. “Can you believe it?! We left our pet beagle with my idiot brother-in-law for a mere fortnight and that zootard taught it how to leg-hump anyone who sits in my favourite recliner!” A. “What’s so strange about that? I thought all dogs leg-hump?” Q. “Male dogs do. But Betsy’s a bitch!”

Etymology: zoo – fr. Greek for “animal” -tard – a slang root derived from the word “retard”

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Created by: nickmarziani

Pronunciation: Neg-lah-dance

Sentence: Karen, look at the neglidance little Susie is doing. Your bastard brother must have let her watch MTV again.

Etymology: Negligence + Dance, of course.

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Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: pat-rih-bull-dree

Sentence: Dear Mr. Silverstein, I'm writing to you today concerning the behavior of your son, Andrew Dice, in my morning kindergarten class. He has become somewhat of a distraction to the class, and I have to question whether or not he is being exposed to the proper developmental tools at home. His sense of humor is overly mature for a class of this level, and I don't think it would be inaccurate to state that he has the vocabulary of a longshoreman. When asked to share his favorite nursery rhyme in class the other day, he recited a profane perversion of "Jack and Jill". He laughs alound whenever someone mentions playing with balls at recess, or I chastise a member of the class for eating paste. I caught a member of the class a week ago giving herself a haircut with the safety shears, and Andrew suggested that she use them for a "Brazillian". He routinely pulls the covers off of female members of the class during nap time, throws a handful of change at them, and tells them "you gotta get outta here". Whether patribaldry is to blame or some other member of your family has instilled these poor behaviors, this must be corrected, or we will have no other option but to remove your child from our school. Sincerely, Mrs. Abagail Trenton, Sunny Heights Grade School

Etymology: patri - of the father, ribaldry - obscene or improper behavior

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COMMENTS:

Nice word and story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-02-26: 16:13:00

Cringed over the sentence. Great word! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 19:18:00

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Created by: freiflug

Pronunciation: /kəˈreskɒnvəˈluːted/

Sentence: "After I have received my turtle Frances back from my brother-in-law, all he does is nibbling the telephone cable. Frances has totally been caressconvoluted."

Etymology: caress: to touch or kiss lovingly; to fondle convulsion: an intense, paroxysmal, involuntary muscular contraction; an uncontrolled fit, as of laughter; a paroxysm Convulsion hereby alters/modifies the meaning of "caress", concluding in a somewhat spoiled interpretation of caressing sth. or so.

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: kon/trer/giv/er

Sentence: "Every time I'm left with that @%&dam !@#$%&* contrargiver brother of yours, I come back with !@#$%&* awful language like this," lamented Fudgy, my beloved parakeet.

Etymology: contrary + caregiver

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COMMENTS:

Great etymology! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 19:28:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: caw rupt

Sentence: My biggest pollygripe about picking up my pet parrot,Polly Walnuts, from my brother after my vacation was to find that he tried to cawrupt the Gullible bird. Instead of saying his usual "Polly wanna cracker", my brother taught him to swear and to answer the phone and impersonate others. He'd say his name was Capt.Jack Sparrow or Peter Finch or Walter Pigeon or Bird Reynolds or Jay Leno or Dan Quail or Denny Crane or Robin Leach or Russell Crow or Feather Locklear or Placido Flamingo. He also taught him rude sentences like, "Come over and I'll show you a cockatoo" or "You should see the big Parakeets in the next cage" and "You're a Raven Loonatic". One thing about birds is that you cannot unteach them to say something once it is wired into their tiny brains on a Condor that they aren't too Swift and that is something that is very hard to Swallow!

Etymology: corrupt (alter from the original;place under suspicion or cast doubt upon; containing errors or alterations)& Caw (a sound made by birds)

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COMMENTS:

That gave your parrot something to crow about. - Mustang, 2008-12-10: 22:48:00

This is funny....got my vote... - mweinmann, 2008-12-11: 18:27:00

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Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ʃənæniˌgæns/ Sounds like "shenanigans" if you say it fast enough, but make sure you pronounce the y as a long "ee" and not as a schwa.

Sentence: Don't believe what you see in the movies; the shenannygans of most flying babysitters do not end well.

Etymology: from she(nani)gans + nanny

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COMMENTS:

like it! - galwaywegian, 2008-02-26: 11:27:00

Really fits the definition and is a great choice of words with great blending! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 18:39:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: pol lee tek neek

Sentence: When Uncle Mikey babysat the Miller's parrot on their annual vacation, she usually learned a new pollytechnique. This year Polly added 3 new swear words to her vocabulary. These words only seemed to be used when the easily-offended were around. You just cannot unteach an old bird new tricks...

Etymology: Polly (common name for a parrot) I Technique (skillfulness in the command of fundamentals deriving from practice and familiarity) & word play on Polytechnic (a technical school offering instruction in many industrial arts and applied sciences)

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Created by: CanadianAndyCapp

Pronunciation: Mal-a-sit-ter-ism

Sentence: Despite all precautions and checking, one cannot totally avoid the possibility that a child will pick up a malasitterism from the babysitter.

Etymology: Mal- Bad / Sitter- Part-time caregiver / ism- habit or manner

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COMMENTS:

Especially if the baby sitter is Mrs. Malaprop! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 18:59:00

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Created by: ddove60

Pronunciation: u mor upt

Sentence: "If uncle Mike umorupts one more child in this house, he will not be welcome for next weeks Nascar race."

Etymology: Humor + Corrupt

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