Verboticisms

Created by: Haydon

Pronunciation: fac- turb

Sentence: Bobby facturb his little sister when he babysat her.

Etymology: Fac-to make turb- disturb

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Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: pat-rih-bull-dree

Sentence: Dear Mr. Silverstein, I'm writing to you today concerning the behavior of your son, Andrew Dice, in my morning kindergarten class. He has become somewhat of a distraction to the class, and I have to question whether or not he is being exposed to the proper developmental tools at home. His sense of humor is overly mature for a class of this level, and I don't think it would be inaccurate to state that he has the vocabulary of a longshoreman. When asked to share his favorite nursery rhyme in class the other day, he recited a profane perversion of "Jack and Jill". He laughs alound whenever someone mentions playing with balls at recess, or I chastise a member of the class for eating paste. I caught a member of the class a week ago giving herself a haircut with the safety shears, and Andrew suggested that she use them for a "Brazillian". He routinely pulls the covers off of female members of the class during nap time, throws a handful of change at them, and tells them "you gotta get outta here". Whether patribaldry is to blame or some other member of your family has instilled these poor behaviors, this must be corrected, or we will have no other option but to remove your child from our school. Sincerely, Mrs. Abagail Trenton, Sunny Heights Grade School

Etymology: patri - of the father, ribaldry - obscene or improper behavior

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COMMENTS:

Nice word and story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-02-26: 16:13:00

Cringed over the sentence. Great word! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 19:18:00

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Created by: XMbIPb

Pronunciation: /zo-o-tard/ (note: each of the “o”s is a distinct sound as in “zoology,” for example; /zu-tard/ is INcorrect)

Sentence: Q. “Can you believe it?! We left our pet beagle with my idiot brother-in-law for a mere fortnight and that zootard taught it how to leg-hump anyone who sits in my favourite recliner!” A. “What’s so strange about that? I thought all dogs leg-hump?” Q. “Male dogs do. But Betsy’s a bitch!”

Etymology: zoo – fr. Greek for “animal” -tard – a slang root derived from the word “retard”

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Created by: CanadianAndyCapp

Pronunciation: Mal-a-sit-ter-ism

Sentence: Despite all precautions and checking, one cannot totally avoid the possibility that a child will pick up a malasitterism from the babysitter.

Etymology: Mal- Bad / Sitter- Part-time caregiver / ism- habit or manner

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COMMENTS:

Especially if the baby sitter is Mrs. Malaprop! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 18:59:00

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: prank-mar

Sentence: Bonny was starting to suspect that her mother was behaving subversively when babysitting her toddlers. Every time they stayed at Nanna's they would spend the following days saying that singlets were uncool, only dweebs wore hats and that making them tidy up their toys was inhibiting their creative development. Bonny was ready to confront Nanna about the prankmas.

Etymology: prank (joke, jape, trick) + grandma (an overly put upon family member who often cares for their grandchildren)

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COMMENTS:

welcome back petaj - great little story - Jabberwocky, 2008-02-26: 13:14:00

Good comeback! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-02-26: 16:13:00

Clever interplay! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 19:25:00

thanks for the welcome back - although I did verbotomize a couple of days back it has been weeks since i played regularly. - petaj, 2008-02-27: 05:29:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: əngkəloōd

Sentence: The kids loved it when Uncle Lew came to visit or to babysit. Cindy is a bit hesitant to ask him to watch the kids. She was never sure what unclewd trick or stunt he would teach them. Last time it was **pull my finger** for the 2-year-old. The time before that, Michael Jackson-style crotch grabs for the 4-year-old. What next?

Etymology: uncle (the brother of one*s father or mother or the husband of one\'s aunt) + lewd (crude and offensive in a sexual way)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: an tix rood sho

Sentence: With no other babysitting options when she left town on business trips, Marcie had no choice but to live with the anticsrudeshow than ensued after her kids went to stay with her elderly Aunt FiFi. Aunt FiFi was ancient but spry, had never wed, and among other things, had travelled the world, been mistress to many famous and notorious men and entertained in burlesque in Vegas and Atlantic City in her checkered career. From her, Marcie's 5 year old daughter and 7 year old son had learned how to shoot craps, read the racing handicaps, mix martinis extra dry, swear like troopers, dance the Charleston and tango, load a derringer, and had watched every mob movie ever made. They had learned to say a lot of new words in Sicilian, spell "Witness Relocation Program" and knew that "RICO" stood for Racketeer Influenced and Corrupt Organizations Act. Yes, Show and Tell days at school after visits to Aunt Fifi were always riotous and resulted in Marcie's being called to the Principal's Office. Marcie thought that the word describing those days should have been called "Aunticsrudeshowandtell" instead!

Etymology: antics (a ludicrous or grotesque act done for fun) & rude (socially incorrect behaviour) & show (a public exhibition or entertainment) & Antiques Road Show (showing off something old whose value is relative and usually not worth as much to others.

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COMMENTS:

Wow, clever creation and amusing story! Was Aunt Fifi inspired by Auntie Mame, perhaps? - Tigger, 2008-02-26: 02:07:00

great story - Jabberwocky, 2008-02-26: 11:43:00

Clever and funny story! Anyhow, it could have been worse: imagine if Beavis & Butthead were Marie's only choice as baby-sitters! - OZZIEBOB, 2008-02-26: 15:59:00

Admire the inventiveness of your word and the play on the tv show! - silveryaspen, 2008-02-26: 18:46:00

Cheers, my friends and in the words of the show....How much do you think it's worth?.... - Nosila, 2008-02-26: 22:15:00

Tigger, I think it was spelled Auntie Maim in this case... - Nosila, 2008-02-26: 22:52:00

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Created by: abrakadeborah

Pronunciation: an-i-mal-ess-tord

Sentence: Uncle animalesstord Polly Parrot so that anytime anyone spoke to the bird it cursed.

Etymology: A play on the words Animal and the word Molested

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: caw rupt

Sentence: My biggest pollygripe about picking up my pet parrot,Polly Walnuts, from my brother after my vacation was to find that he tried to cawrupt the Gullible bird. Instead of saying his usual "Polly wanna cracker", my brother taught him to swear and to answer the phone and impersonate others. He'd say his name was Capt.Jack Sparrow or Peter Finch or Walter Pigeon or Bird Reynolds or Jay Leno or Dan Quail or Denny Crane or Robin Leach or Russell Crow or Feather Locklear or Placido Flamingo. He also taught him rude sentences like, "Come over and I'll show you a cockatoo" or "You should see the big Parakeets in the next cage" and "You're a Raven Loonatic". One thing about birds is that you cannot unteach them to say something once it is wired into their tiny brains on a Condor that they aren't too Swift and that is something that is very hard to Swallow!

Etymology: corrupt (alter from the original;place under suspicion or cast doubt upon; containing errors or alterations)& Caw (a sound made by birds)

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COMMENTS:

That gave your parrot something to crow about. - Mustang, 2008-12-10: 22:48:00

This is funny....got my vote... - mweinmann, 2008-12-11: 18:27:00

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: ha - bet - ah - pet

Sentence: Jerry regretted that he had participated in habetapet after leaving his dog, Gina with his friend Craig. He felt that it was really his fault that she had picked up several new bad behaviors, like jumping on everyone who walked through the door, excessive begging and worse of all, he had taught her how to flirt.....if that was possible.

Etymology: A combination of Habit with a twisted spelling (a behavior that is repeated) + abet (to aid or encourage, usually in some wrong doing) + Pet (a domesticated animal kept for companionship or amusement)

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