Verboticisms

Created by: zavijava

Pronunciation:

Sentence: Larry sprained his wrist fracturning the jar, but the pickles were just fine.

Etymology: fracture-turn

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Mawtch-o-lim-in-ayshun

Sentence: Failing to open the jar after four attempts Delbert suffered a bout of depressing macholimination.

Etymology: Macho + elimination

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Created by: gcolton

Pronunciation:

Sentence:

Etymology:

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: tork chewer

Sentence: The torqueture was all the more painful because he didn't even like branston pickle.

Etymology: torque, torture

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COMMENTS:

maybe he should dill-iberate more when he chooses his pickles - Jabberwocky, 2007-10-30: 12:15:00

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Created by: Kevcom

Pronunciation: Buh-stah-straèèss

Sentence: Georgie Choo bustastressed the old pickle jar t'ill it cracked, and his hands were bleeding, and his eyes were red and his face was pink, and his wife was saying "What a douche - give me that jar, I'll open it!"

Etymology: Bust (bust open) á (at) stress (stressing levels)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rist sist

Sentence: Stanley could normally open anything but this pickle jar was determined to wristsist all his efforts. Try as he mite, he could not open it. What he did not realize was that he had met the leader of the Wristsistance in his fridge, Colonel Cornichon. The Colonel had dilliberately held his position and mobilized his highly trained commandos, The Gherkins, to hold off Stanley's attacks. When Stanley held their stronghold under hot water and tapped it with a knife, the Colonel knew the siege was almost over and mustard his courage and sent out an SOS (Sweet or Sour) signal: "Mayo-day, Mayo-day, we don't relish this a salt. Although we've worked hard for our bread and butter, pickles, it is time to use our brines and admit defeat, since wristsistance is futile and sing the old war songs. 'Goodbye, Piccallili, Farewell Leicester Square, it's a long, long way to sip a sherry, but my heart's right there'. Dill we meet again, in the Alimentary Canal, I salute you."

Etymology: Wrist (a joint between the distal end of the radius and the proximal row of carpal bones) & Resist (refuse to comply;withstand the force of something;elude, especially in a baffling way)

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COMMENTS:

Can't open the pickle jar? No big dill! Great paranomasiac story... - LoftyDreamer, 2008-09-29: 20:23:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: twist/zur/shun

Sentence: Joe's twenty minute twistertion with the mustard jar ended with him smashing it on the kitchen floor and angerily yelling, "I got the #@&^*ing jar open, honey."

Etymology: TWISTERTION - from TWIST (to cause to move with a rotary motion) + EXERTION (vigorous action, or effort)

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: järzilə

Sentence: John is often called upon to do battle with jarzilla. His manhood is truly challenged when he can’t get a simple pickle jar open. The insult is even worse when his petite wife opens one with ease. He always claims he had it 90% open when she got it.

Etymology: jar (a wide-mouthed, cylindrical container made of glass or pottery, esp. one used for storing food.) + Godzilla (prehistoric monster featured in a series of Japanese films from 1955)

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Created by: lumina

Pronunciation: mah/cheez/bo

Sentence: Judith did her best to never show up at family potlucks, parties, etc. early. She did not want to take the chance that her macheesebeau Ernie might end up in the kitchen with Mom. He didn't know the first thing about cooking. He just liked to impress Mom with his strength. Unfortunately, nine times out of ten, Mom would finally say, "Give that to me!" as she grabbed and with one swift twist opened the jars Ernie had just busted a nut on trying to get open. :)

Etymology: Macho Cheeseball Beau

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: jär-p'ə-lěp'sē

Sentence: Walter's eyes were nearly bulging out of their sockets, his lips pulled back in a rictus snarl, red-faced and snarling, and Sue could see the veins sticking out on his forehead when she walked into the room -- she nearly turned and ran until she saw the pickle jar he was trying to open, and realized it was just a case of jarpilepsy, and his machochistic need to show her that he could pull out his pickle.

Etymology: jar (Middle English jarre) + epilepsy (from Gk. epilepsia "seizure")

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