Verboticisms

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: dil fik ultee

Sentence: Who knew getting Herb to open a jar of pickles could end up being such a dillficulty? His caper started when Madge asked him to turn the lid. He used such force that he broke off the top and the contents landed on the floor. He turned something that should be dillicious into something dillsastrous.

Etymology: Dill (pickle preserved in brine or vinegar flavored with dill seed)& Difficulty (a factor causing trouble in achieving a positive result or tending to produce a negative result)

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Created by: xirtam

Pronunciation: kən-Tawrk

Sentence: As I watched my girlfriend contorque to open the jar of peanut butter, I thought to myself, “This is not 'good' naked.”

Etymology: Latin contorquēre Latin torques

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: järzilə

Sentence: John is often called upon to do battle with jarzilla. His manhood is truly challenged when he can’t get a simple pickle jar open. The insult is even worse when his petite wife opens one with ease. He always claims he had it 90% open when she got it.

Etymology: jar (a wide-mouthed, cylindrical container made of glass or pottery, esp. one used for storing food.) + Godzilla (prehistoric monster featured in a series of Japanese films from 1955)

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: torrk chewer

Sentence: The torqueture caused the strain of four muscles and at least two little pickles

Etymology: torque torture

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COMMENTS:

excellent - Jabberwocky, 2008-09-26: 15:02:00

The root of this word must be Torquemada, the Grand Torturer of the Spanish Inquisition! - Nosila, 2008-09-26: 20:24:00

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Created by: veranadine

Pronunciation:

Sentence: He began to emascujarggle with assembling the new bicycle, to no avail.

Etymology: masculine, emasculate, jar, struggle, juggle

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: rist sist

Sentence: Stanley could normally open anything but this pickle jar was determined to wristsist all his efforts. Try as he mite, he could not open it. What he did not realize was that he had met the leader of the Wristsistance in his fridge, Colonel Cornichon. The Colonel had dilliberately held his position and mobilized his highly trained commandos, The Gherkins, to hold off Stanley's attacks. When Stanley held their stronghold under hot water and tapped it with a knife, the Colonel knew the siege was almost over and mustard his courage and sent out an SOS (Sweet or Sour) signal: "Mayo-day, Mayo-day, we don't relish this a salt. Although we've worked hard for our bread and butter, pickles, it is time to use our brines and admit defeat, since wristsistance is futile and sing the old war songs. 'Goodbye, Piccallili, Farewell Leicester Square, it's a long, long way to sip a sherry, but my heart's right there'. Dill we meet again, in the Alimentary Canal, I salute you."

Etymology: Wrist (a joint between the distal end of the radius and the proximal row of carpal bones) & Resist (refuse to comply;withstand the force of something;elude, especially in a baffling way)

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COMMENTS:

Can't open the pickle jar? No big dill! Great paranomasiac story... - LoftyDreamer, 2008-09-29: 20:23:00

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Created by: stilt

Pronunciation: dil'-vawlt

Sentence: Stan was determined to free the crisp, Kosher Vlasics from the dillvault. Unfortunately, he chipped a filling while attempting to dillvault the stubborn lid.

Etymology: dillvault from "dill", a spice used in making pickles, and "vault", a safe.

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Created by: November

Pronunciation:

Sentence: He could just as well stop trying to twist and shout, this was one of those definite ajarafar's.

Etymology: (the obvious a Jar) Ajar adv. & adj. Partially opened: left the door ajar. + A far adj., farther or further, farthest or furthest. Being at considerable distance; remote: a far country. Going back a considerable extent in time: the far past. More distant than another: the far corner. Extensive or lengthy: a far trek.

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COMMENTS:

or Ajarafarce Where the ending is also the word *farce • noun 1 a comic dramatic work or genre using buffoonery and horseplay and typically including ludicrously improbable situations. 2 an absurd event. - November, 2008-09-30: 08:43:00

Wow. - metrohumanx, 2008-09-30: 14:36:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: twist/zur/shun

Sentence: Joe's twenty minute twistertion with the mustard jar ended with him smashing it on the kitchen floor and angerily yelling, "I got the #@&^*ing jar open, honey."

Etymology: TWISTERTION - from TWIST (to cause to move with a rotary motion) + EXERTION (vigorous action, or effort)

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Created by: idavecook

Pronunciation: S

Sentence: Henry, despite all his schroucherization, could not budge the cap from Helen's bottle of nail polish remover.

Etymology:

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