Verboticisms

Created by: catgrin

Pronunciation: ant-il-yuh n (sounds like "ant" + "million" -"m")

Sentence: (n) No amount of hours at the gym could stop the antileans from taking oven my waistline. (v) By 35, most women antilean, diet and exercise simply cannot return them to their size fours.

Etymology: A simple compound of "anti" and "lean" using a softer vowel sounds and slightly shifted emphasis to give the sound of tiny hordes attacking.

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kou-uhs-then-iks

Sentence: Roger goes to the gym on a regular basis. What he calls a workout rarely involves much work. His cowisthenics usually involve hoofing it to the closest vending machine for an "energy" drink and "health" bar. On a really energetic visit he might be moooved to join a short basketball game, take a quick shower and herd for the donut shop on his way home to replenish all those expended carbs.

Etymology: cow (a mature bovine) + calisthenics (gymnastic exercises designed to develop physical health and vigor)

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Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: nin-jewels

Sentence: Dear Lord, "So grant me strength that I may not fall, Into the clutches of cholesterol. May my flesh with carrot curls be sated That my soul may be polyunsaturated. And show me the light that I may bear witness To the President's Council on Physical Fitness." Deliver us from ninjoules so those sneaky pounds won't make us fools. Amen Quoted section by Victor Buono "The fat man's prayer" -- http://www.themadmusicarchive.com/song_details.aspx?SongID=3657.

Etymology: ninja (practitioners of japanese espionage, characterised by stealth) + joules (units of energy, that are easily converted into adipose tissue by the unsuspecting couch potato)

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COMMENTS:

Great fat man's prayer! Great Word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 09:58:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: rē-inkärbnāshən

Sentence: It wasn't his fault. It was a matter of reincarbnation. The more Phat thought about it the more he believed in regirth. He must have been a sumo in a former life or perhaps a large animal. That would explain the hippobottomus. It was all in his jeans. After another fruitless trip to the gym, he went out and bought another pair of elepants.

Etymology: reincarnation (a person or animal in whom a particular soul is believed to have been reborn) + carb (short for carbohydrate)

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COMMENTS:

Love them elepants. - wayoffcenter, 2009-01-09: 06:34:00

Funny! - kateinkorea, 2009-01-09: 09:53:00

Love it and the story...so deja vu, all over again! - Nosila, 2009-01-09: 19:51:00

Super punsome and funsome! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-09: 20:45:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kil ler gramz

Sentence: Melanie had tried everything to lose a few pounds, like Weight Watchers, Nutrisystem, Jenny Craig, Atkins, LA Weight Loss, Herbal Magic, Scarsdale, The Zone, heck even Oprah Winfrey's latest method. She visited their sites everyday, but lost not an ounce. She had also tried every possible fitness regime, too. But no matter what she tried, she still had those extra killergrams on her that she could not shed. She actually got a lot of exercise in her daily routine: she surfed the Net, jumped to conclusions, ran out of money, juggled her tasks, pushed her luck, drove her family mad and plowed through her paperwork, but still a thin body eluded her. How would she ever look as good as those women on the magazine covers in the grocery store? You know, the ones who stared back at you accusingly as you bought ice cream, pop, chips, candy and booze!

Etymology: Kilograms (metric weight unit of 1000 grams) & Killer (a difficulty that is hard to deal with;the causal agent resulting in death Example: "Heart disease is the biggest killer in America")

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COMMENTS:

heeheehee!!! - galwaywegian, 2009-01-09: 04:16:00

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Created by: rikboyee

Pronunciation: kil-err-joolz

Sentence: every time he attempted to lose weight he would be ambushed by killerjoules

Etymology: killer, kilojoules

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COMMENTS:

So true! So Powerful! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:11:00

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Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: lard/jes

Sentence: He was know far and wide for his lardgesse

Etymology: lard + largesse

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COMMENTS:

Heh! Love it! - Jamagra, 2008-03-19: 14:09:00

Simple and Super Word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 20:38:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hek sir syes

Sentence: Although he exercised regularly and ate properly, Tim felt that someone had cursed him. This hexercise prevented his losing any weight. He was mystified, as he had cut back his donuts to just the one dozen per day. How much more sacrificing could he be expected to do???

Etymology: Hex (cast a spell over someone or something; put a hex on someone or something) & Exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit)

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Created by: moondragon

Pronunciation: fit-nuh-glitch

Sentence: There must be some kind of fitneglitch in this exercise plan. My daily work out just seems to make my love handles bigger.

Etymology: A combination of fitness (health) + glitch (error).

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Created by: paperhoard

Pronunciation: Fatty-mo-sis

Sentence: Jim seems to gain weight by simply having fatty food near his paunch. Scientifically this process is called fattimosis, fat traveling from one area to another directly through the paunch layer. Jim is now at the point where he can butter his bread simply by rubbing it across his stomach.

Etymology: Fatty + Osmosis

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COMMENTS:

Great last line ... Great Verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:46:00

very funny - bookowl, 2008-03-19: 14:23:00

Thank you! - paperhoard, 2008-03-19: 14:46:00

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