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'I've been working out on this ab machine every day for a week'

DEFINITION: n. The creepy pounds that sneak onto your waist even though you've been exercising and watching what you eat. v. To exercise rigorously, diet fastidiously, and yet still gain weight.

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Verboticisms

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Sixpackflabs

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /siks-pak-FLABZ/

Sentence: Russell had switched to whole-grain doughnuts, light beer, and he was now using only low-fat mayonaise on his bacon and cheese sandwiches, plus, he'd been taking the stairs up to his 2nd floor apartment once a day, instead of using the elevator, and he'd even started doing armchair aerobics — trying to reach down to touch his knees during the TV commercials — and yet he was still gaining weight. Now he had sixpackflabs to show for it, and was well on his way to sporting a keg-belly.

Etymology: blend of; Six-Pack-Abs - well developed abdominal muscles (colloqiualism for the three pairs of bulges apparent in well defined abdominal muscles) + Flabs - soft fatty body tissue (back-formation from flabby, from Middle English, flabband "flapping")

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COMMENTS:

Roared with laughter over keg-belly and sixpackflabs! Terrific Wons! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:02:00

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Phenomaprocurity

Created by: yelloweyes

Pronunciation: fe-naw-maw-pro-cure-it-ee

Sentence: Shelly has been gaining weight recently. She said it was because she is experiencing phenomaprocurity, but I do not believe she is actually dieting or exercising.

Etymology: Phenoma - from phenomenon (fact or situation with a questionable/unknown cause) Procurity - from procure (to obtain).

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Fitneglitch

moondragon

Created by: moondragon

Pronunciation: fit-nuh-glitch

Sentence: There must be some kind of fitneglitch in this exercise plan. My daily work out just seems to make my love handles bigger.

Etymology: A combination of fitness (health) + glitch (error).

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Fatscites

lplybon

Created by: lplybon

Pronunciation: "Fat-SI-tees"

Sentence: Over the past four months -- after her doctor scared the beejeesus out of her -- Sophie has religiously exercised, watched what she eats, and even goes to those (sometimes really irritating) support groups. And the result? A total loss of three stinking pounds. And to add insult to injury, Sophie notices that her fascites seems to have grown! How can that be!?!

Etymology: Combination of the word "fat" and "ascites"

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Itsfatsyouate

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: Itz - fats - yoo - ayt

Sentence: When Melvin saw how much 'girth' he'd gained in recent months he muttered to himself while staring, mouth agape, at his reflection in the mirror, "I know itsfatsyouate, you big blob."

Etymology: Play on the word infatuate. Infers being infatuated with rich, fatty foods.

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Cowisthenics

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kou-uhs-then-iks

Sentence: Roger goes to the gym on a regular basis. What he calls a workout rarely involves much work. His cowisthenics usually involve hoofing it to the closest vending machine for an "energy" drink and "health" bar. On a really energetic visit he might be moooved to join a short basketball game, take a quick shower and herd for the donut shop on his way home to replenish all those expended carbs.

Etymology: cow (a mature bovine) + calisthenics (gymnastic exercises designed to develop physical health and vigor)

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Fattimosis

Created by: paperhoard

Pronunciation: Fatty-mo-sis

Sentence: Jim seems to gain weight by simply having fatty food near his paunch. Scientifically this process is called fattimosis, fat traveling from one area to another directly through the paunch layer. Jim is now at the point where he can butter his bread simply by rubbing it across his stomach.

Etymology: Fatty + Osmosis

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COMMENTS:

Great last line ... Great Verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:46:00

very funny - bookowl, 2008-03-19: 14:23:00

Thank you! - paperhoard, 2008-03-19: 14:46:00

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Stealthfood

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: stellth-food

Sentence: The scale gave a small muffled electronic scream when Andy brought his full weight to bear. He was just about done with trying to shape up; two weeks of treadmill and proper diet had led to a 5-pound gain. Unfortunately, Andy had been mistaken in his meal-selecting logic, and all of the sensible meals he had recently consumed were in fact stealthfoods. The 8-oz portion of fish the night before, for example, had come from an Eastern Stoned Lardwrasse. After a lazy afternoon on the reef smoking reefer, the fish had consumed a bag of Funyuns, 3 Big Macs, 2 orders of fries, a chocolate shake, and a carton of Haagen Daazs. Leaving his friends laughing in his enormous wake, calling him names like "Marlin Brando", the lardwrasse had groggily stumbled into a waiting net, his certain doom, and another veneer of fat on Andy's barely denim-constrained buttocks.

Etymology: stealth + food; ala healthfood

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COMMENTS:

What a witty twist to come up with an eat-it-self-to-death fish that packs weight on humans! Topped off with a meaning full great pun! Excellent Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:06:00

Now I know why I almost bought that bag of Bloomin' Onion Crisps at the store tonight. Bastard Banky! (Sorry James!) Nice word! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-19: 20:55:00

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Faticulous

Created by: kateinkorea

Pronunciation: fat IC u lus

Sentence: I work out, I try to eat properly and then even after painstaking detailed gym attendance this damn faticulous weight appears.

Etymology: FAT: + RIDICULOUS: not serious, unreasonable METICULOUS: careful attention to detail

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Sofanogood

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: so fa no gud

Sentence: Dwight's campaign motto to lose weight was (sofasogood) but it was turning into (sofanogood) due to his unexpected weight gain on lettuce leaves alone in the first week.

Etymology: So far so good (optimistic) & Sofa (couch) no good (not for weight loss, anyway!)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-19: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

Mustang - 2008-03-19: 00:49:00
Infatsyouate

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-26: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

hombwedleMi - 2018-05-26: 08:39:00
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hombwedleMi - 2018-05-26: 11:22:00
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