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'I've been working out on this ab machine every day for a week'

DEFINITION: n. The creepy pounds that sneak onto your waist even though you've been exercising and watching what you eat. v. To exercise rigorously, diet fastidiously, and yet still gain weight.

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Verboticisms

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Stealthfood

Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: stellth-food

Sentence: The scale gave a small muffled electronic scream when Andy brought his full weight to bear. He was just about done with trying to shape up; two weeks of treadmill and proper diet had led to a 5-pound gain. Unfortunately, Andy had been mistaken in his meal-selecting logic, and all of the sensible meals he had recently consumed were in fact stealthfoods. The 8-oz portion of fish the night before, for example, had come from an Eastern Stoned Lardwrasse. After a lazy afternoon on the reef smoking reefer, the fish had consumed a bag of Funyuns, 3 Big Macs, 2 orders of fries, a chocolate shake, and a carton of Haagen Daazs. Leaving his friends laughing in his enormous wake, calling him names like "Marlin Brando", the lardwrasse had groggily stumbled into a waiting net, his certain doom, and another veneer of fat on Andy's barely denim-constrained buttocks.

Etymology: stealth + food; ala healthfood

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COMMENTS:

What a witty twist to come up with an eat-it-self-to-death fish that packs weight on humans! Topped off with a meaning full great pun! Excellent Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:06:00

Now I know why I almost bought that bag of Bloomin' Onion Crisps at the store tonight. Bastard Banky! (Sorry James!) Nice word! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-19: 20:55:00

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Asstonnagement

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: ass/tun/aj/ment

Sentence: She gasped with asstonnagemnet when she tried to sit in her favourite chair and found she couldn't fit any longer - so much for those protein bars.

Etymology: ass + tonnage + astonishment

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COMMENTS:

HA! Good one! Quite cheeky! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-19: 07:19:00

Laughing so hard I can barely type! Funtastic Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:30:00

Thanks a ton! You made my day! - Jamagra, 2008-03-19: 14:12:00

His day of astonement will suely come! Nice blend of words. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-20: 05:05:00

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Fattimosis

Created by: paperhoard

Pronunciation: Fatty-mo-sis

Sentence: Jim seems to gain weight by simply having fatty food near his paunch. Scientifically this process is called fattimosis, fat traveling from one area to another directly through the paunch layer. Jim is now at the point where he can butter his bread simply by rubbing it across his stomach.

Etymology: Fatty + Osmosis

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COMMENTS:

Great last line ... Great Verboticism! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:46:00

very funny - bookowl, 2008-03-19: 14:23:00

Thank you! - paperhoard, 2008-03-19: 14:46:00

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Lardgesse

Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: lard/jes

Sentence: He was know far and wide for his lardgesse

Etymology: lard + largesse

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COMMENTS:

Heh! Love it! - Jamagra, 2008-03-19: 14:09:00

Simple and Super Word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 20:38:00

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Asstonnagement

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: ass/tun/aj/ment

Sentence: Sally gasped with asstonnagement when she tried to sit in her favourite chair and found she couldn't fit any longer - so much for those protein bars.

Etymology: ass + tonnage + astonishment

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COMMENTS:

Cute word - Nosila, 2009-01-09: 19:53:00

Very memorable! Nice way to say being overweight is a real pain in the a** ...in more ways than one. Sticks in my memory like Sally's bottom sticks in the chair! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-09: 20:51:00

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Rolbax

Created by: Biscotti

Pronunciation: role-backs

Sentence: John couldn't figure out why he had a horrible case of the rolbax. He weighed himself every night before bed and then weighed himself every morning at about 5 pounds more than the previous day's start. He used the weight set day and night for weeks; and was ready to file a complaint to the company until his wife told him he had a horrible midnight snack attack every night...to which John replied, "But I only ate 5 pork chops, two gallons of ice cream and drank half a keg of beer..."

Etymology: roll (to move) + backs (coming back)

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COMMENTS:

Like those rollbacks at Walmart ... that keep creeping up on you! Best part of your words is the 'ax' ... for chopping fat off! Fun Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:15:00

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Cowisthenics

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kou-uhs-then-iks

Sentence: Roger goes to the gym on a regular basis. What he calls a workout rarely involves much work. His cowisthenics usually involve hoofing it to the closest vending machine for an "energy" drink and "health" bar. On a really energetic visit he might be moooved to join a short basketball game, take a quick shower and herd for the donut shop on his way home to replenish all those expended carbs.

Etymology: cow (a mature bovine) + calisthenics (gymnastic exercises designed to develop physical health and vigor)

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Killergrams

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: kil ler gramz

Sentence: Melanie had tried everything to lose a few pounds, like Weight Watchers, Nutrisystem, Jenny Craig, Atkins, LA Weight Loss, Herbal Magic, Scarsdale, The Zone, heck even Oprah Winfrey's latest method. She visited their sites everyday, but lost not an ounce. She had also tried every possible fitness regime, too. But no matter what she tried, she still had those extra killergrams on her that she could not shed. She actually got a lot of exercise in her daily routine: she surfed the Net, jumped to conclusions, ran out of money, juggled her tasks, pushed her luck, drove her family mad and plowed through her paperwork, but still a thin body eluded her. How would she ever look as good as those women on the magazine covers in the grocery store? You know, the ones who stared back at you accusingly as you bought ice cream, pop, chips, candy and booze!

Etymology: Kilograms (metric weight unit of 1000 grams) & Killer (a difficulty that is hard to deal with;the causal agent resulting in death Example: "Heart disease is the biggest killer in America")

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COMMENTS:

heeheehee!!! - galwaywegian, 2009-01-09: 04:16:00

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Sofanogood

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: so fa no gud

Sentence: Dwight's campaign motto to lose weight was (sofasogood) but it was turning into (sofanogood) due to his unexpected weight gain on lettuce leaves alone in the first week.

Etymology: So far so good (optimistic) & Sofa (couch) no good (not for weight loss, anyway!)

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Sneakilo

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: snee kee lo

Sentence: He couldn't believe all of those sneakilos that had made their way onto the scales with him, humiliating him in front of his gorgeous personal trainer. Now he could never ask her out. He peered through the window at the gym across the raod, where he could just about see her on the pilates ball over the top of his mcbreakfast.

Etymology: sneakily, kilo

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COMMENTS:

Wonderful sentence and word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:03:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-03-19: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

Mustang - 2008-03-19: 00:49:00
Infatsyouate

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-05-26: 00:00:00
Today's definition was suggested by silveryaspen. Thank you silveryaspen. ~ James

hombwedleMi - 2018-05-26: 08:39:00
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hombwedleMi - 2018-05-26: 11:22:00
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