Verboticisms

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: kou-uhs-then-iks

Sentence: Roger goes to the gym on a regular basis. What he calls a workout rarely involves much work. His cowisthenics usually involve hoofing it to the closest vending machine for an "energy" drink and "health" bar. On a really energetic visit he might be moooved to join a short basketball game, take a quick shower and herd for the donut shop on his way home to replenish all those expended carbs.

Etymology: cow (a mature bovine) + calisthenics (gymnastic exercises designed to develop physical health and vigor)

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Created by: moondragon

Pronunciation: fit-nuh-glitch

Sentence: There must be some kind of fitneglitch in this exercise plan. My daily work out just seems to make my love handles bigger.

Etymology: A combination of fitness (health) + glitch (error).

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: hek sir syes

Sentence: Although he exercised regularly and ate properly, Tim felt that someone had cursed him. This hexercise prevented his losing any weight. He was mystified, as he had cut back his donuts to just the one dozen per day. How much more sacrificing could he be expected to do???

Etymology: Hex (cast a spell over someone or something; put a hex on someone or something) & Exercise (the activity of exerting your muscles in various ways to keep fit)

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Created by: lplybon

Pronunciation: "Fat-SI-tees"

Sentence: Over the past four months -- after her doctor scared the beejeesus out of her -- Sophie has religiously exercised, watched what she eats, and even goes to those (sometimes really irritating) support groups. And the result? A total loss of three stinking pounds. And to add insult to injury, Sophie notices that her fascites seems to have grown! How can that be!?!

Etymology: Combination of the word "fat" and "ascites"

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Created by: mweinmann

Pronunciation: fat - kins

Sentence: Ben came from a long line of Fatkins, and to make it worse, everyone in his family was overweight, despite the fact that they were all active people who participated in sports and watched their calories. They had all tried every fad diet that came around, including Jenny Craig, Atkins, Weight Watchers and even the Grapefruit Diet. He remembers that growing up, his mom had been given to using humor as a way to feel better about things. She even affectionately referred to the rolls on her stomach as her little fatkins. Once Ben even tried to sue Dr. Atkins for taking the family surname and capitalizing on it.....

Etymology: Fat (overweight, having an abundance of flesh + Atkins Diet (A diet in which a person attempts to lose weight by reducing the intake of carbohydrates, instead obtaining energy from dietary and stored fat) + Kin (group of people related by blood or marriage)

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COMMENTS:

So he declared a Fatwah on Dr. Atkins...good word! - Nosila, 2009-01-09: 19:48:00

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Created by: Banky

Pronunciation: stellth-food

Sentence: The scale gave a small muffled electronic scream when Andy brought his full weight to bear. He was just about done with trying to shape up; two weeks of treadmill and proper diet had led to a 5-pound gain. Unfortunately, Andy had been mistaken in his meal-selecting logic, and all of the sensible meals he had recently consumed were in fact stealthfoods. The 8-oz portion of fish the night before, for example, had come from an Eastern Stoned Lardwrasse. After a lazy afternoon on the reef smoking reefer, the fish had consumed a bag of Funyuns, 3 Big Macs, 2 orders of fries, a chocolate shake, and a carton of Haagen Daazs. Leaving his friends laughing in his enormous wake, calling him names like "Marlin Brando", the lardwrasse had groggily stumbled into a waiting net, his certain doom, and another veneer of fat on Andy's barely denim-constrained buttocks.

Etymology: stealth + food; ala healthfood

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COMMENTS:

What a witty twist to come up with an eat-it-self-to-death fish that packs weight on humans! Topped off with a meaning full great pun! Excellent Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:06:00

Now I know why I almost bought that bag of Bloomin' Onion Crisps at the store tonight. Bastard Banky! (Sorry James!) Nice word! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-19: 20:55:00

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Created by: artr

Pronunciation: rē-inkärbnāshən

Sentence: It wasn't his fault. It was a matter of reincarbnation. The more Phat thought about it the more he believed in regirth. He must have been a sumo in a former life or perhaps a large animal. That would explain the hippobottomus. It was all in his jeans. After another fruitless trip to the gym, he went out and bought another pair of elepants.

Etymology: reincarnation (a person or animal in whom a particular soul is believed to have been reborn) + carb (short for carbohydrate)

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COMMENTS:

Love them elepants. - wayoffcenter, 2009-01-09: 06:34:00

Funny! - kateinkorea, 2009-01-09: 09:53:00

Love it and the story...so deja vu, all over again! - Nosila, 2009-01-09: 19:51:00

Super punsome and funsome! - silveryaspen, 2009-01-09: 20:45:00

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Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: ass/tun/aj/ment

Sentence: She gasped with asstonnagemnet when she tried to sit in her favourite chair and found she couldn't fit any longer - so much for those protein bars.

Etymology: ass + tonnage + astonishment

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COMMENTS:

HA! Good one! Quite cheeky! - purpleartichokes, 2008-03-19: 07:19:00

Laughing so hard I can barely type! Funtastic Won! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:30:00

Thanks a ton! You made my day! - Jamagra, 2008-03-19: 14:12:00

His day of astonement will suely come! Nice blend of words. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-03-20: 05:05:00

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /siks-pak-FLABZ/

Sentence: Russell had switched to whole-grain doughnuts, light beer, and he was now using only low-fat mayonaise on his bacon and cheese sandwiches, plus, he'd been taking the stairs up to his 2nd floor apartment once a day, instead of using the elevator, and he'd even started doing armchair aerobics — trying to reach down to touch his knees during the TV commercials — and yet he was still gaining weight. Now he had sixpackflabs to show for it, and was well on his way to sporting a keg-belly.

Etymology: blend of; Six-Pack-Abs - well developed abdominal muscles (colloqiualism for the three pairs of bulges apparent in well defined abdominal muscles) + Flabs - soft fatty body tissue (back-formation from flabby, from Middle English, flabband "flapping")

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COMMENTS:

Roared with laughter over keg-belly and sixpackflabs! Terrific Wons! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:02:00

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: snee kee lo

Sentence: He couldn't believe all of those sneakilos that had made their way onto the scales with him, humiliating him in front of his gorgeous personal trainer. Now he could never ask her out. He peered through the window at the gym across the raod, where he could just about see her on the pilates ball over the top of his mcbreakfast.

Etymology: sneakily, kilo

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COMMENTS:

Wonderful sentence and word! - silveryaspen, 2008-03-19: 10:03:00

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