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'How many trees did you kill to print that?'

DEFINITION: v., To compulsively print out paper copies of all electronic files. n., A printing fetish common among paper pushers who suffer from a paranoid fear that their digital files are disintegrating on their hard drives.

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Verboticisms

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Microhardoffensive

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: my kro hard off fen siff

Sentence: When she was in school, long ago, Millie learned that computers (or machines that did your talking and thinking for you) were something out of science fiction. Trying to not feel like a dinosaur on a space station, she had dutifully taken all the computer courses her company had offered. She managed most programs with good efficiency, but one aspect dogged her progress in the company. It was noted that she always printed off absolutely everything that she received or sent over the computer. In a paperless society, she had managed to accrue more paper files than anyone else. It was said she had a microhardoffensive disorder...she had a compulsion to print out everything, not trusting the memory or hard drive of the systems her company used. It was a touch of irony that when the BIG CRASH came and wiped out all primary and back-up systems, that the management came to Millie to get her paper files in order to rebuild and salvage their records!

Etymology: Microhard (as opposed to Microsoft,the computer giant) & Hard (not easy; requiring great physical or mental effort to accomplish or comprehend or endure)also Hard (as in hard copy...a printed version of something on screen) & offensive (unpleasant or disgusting especially to the senses)

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Clericalamity

Created by: bzav1

Pronunciation: clear-ick-al-a-mity

Sentence: A colossal clericalamity, Jane had changed the lock for the photocopy room and insisted that all office correspondence pass through her in order to be categorized by a colour coding that she had devised.

Etymology: clerical+calamity

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Dittolusion

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: dĭt-ō-lōō'-zhən

Sentence: Marlene's desk simply could not handle the weight -- it wasn't built to handle that type of load. Due to her technophrenia, and her compulsion to actually handle these apparently invisible files everyone kept telling her were stored inside her computer, she would print out every single e-mail and add it to the growing stacks, forming a 'literal fort' inside her cubicle. It's obvious that she's suffering from a dittolusion, and her desk finally paid the price.

Etymology: ditto (a duplicate or copy) + delusion (a false belief in spite of invalidating evidence).

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COMMENTS:

Trees actually cringe when Marlene walks by, and printers consider her Satan's avatar. - Tigger, 2007-11-07: 22:31:00

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Eforestation

Created by: wordslikevenom

Pronunciation: ee-for-est-station

Sentence: Kellie could never shake the old adage drummed into her since back in the days before eforestation was coined as a winning word on Verbotomy dot com. "If it's not printed out on fan-fold, continuous stripy green paper, it's not backed-up", she'd mumble.

Etymology: (d)eforestation: electronic removal of a forest or stand of trees

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Rughaper

Created by: WriteBrighton

Pronunciation: Rug-hay-pur

Sentence: The office rughaper would be arrested for raping trees without consent or consideration if Mother Nature was in charge of the law.

Etymology:

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COMMENTS:

2nd Choice: KINKBLOTCH - WriteBrighton, 2018-03-04: 14:38:00

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Substantialiate

Created by: serickson

Pronunciation: sub stan shull yate

Sentence: "But it will get lost in the ethers of cyberspace, which is only a fantasy world after all," grumbled Kyle when his boss told him he'd have to pay for the paper he used if he kept on substantialating his email messages. "At least this way I have something I can hold on to. Email messages aren't really real - You don't even have to be a magician to make them disappear. Look at this," he continued, nodding towards the stack of papers that were bowing him down," I can touch these...pant...pant...pant."

Etymology: substantial - solid, heavy, and real. substantiate - to verify that something is indeed something.

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Inkjedi

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: i ng k jedˌī

Sentence: Lewis didn't didn't care that he was burning through reams of paper for he was an InkJedi. He was saving the company e-files from the dark force that causes documents to go stale if they sit too long on the server. Forget that most of this stuff should have deleted soon after it was created, Lewis kept himself busy lining his squirrel's nest of an office with papers he could never find if he had to. It made him feel at one with the Force even if it kept him from getting any real work done.

Etymology: ink-jet (a printer in which the characters are formed by minute jets of ink) Jedi (a member of the mystical knightly order in the Star Wars films, trained to guard peace and justice in the the universe)

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COMMENTS:

He was probably responding to the voices coming from the stacks of pristine paper - "Luke - I am your fodder". - Jabberwocky, 2008-10-06: 10:24:00

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Datascriber

Created by: yellowbird

Pronunciation: da-ta-screye-bur

Sentence: Vicki's such a datascriber there's no paper left in the whole office!

Etymology: data + scribe (writer)

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Papyrulimia

Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: puh/pahy/ruhlim/ee/uh

Sentence: With unlimited reams of corporate paper, Jenny slowly descended the long, lonely path of papyrulimia where she continuously feed the photocopy machine as much paper as it could swallow and with great satisfaction watched it spew out copy after copy after copy.

Etymology: PAPYRULIMIA - noun - from PAPYRUS (paper) + BULIMIA (an eating disorder characterized by frequent episodes of grossly excessive food intake followed by self-induced vomiting)

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COMMENTS:

good, but icky! - Nosila, 2010-03-04: 18:10:00

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