Verboticisms

Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: /EE-gad-van-tij/

Sentence: When Vinny, the apprentice electrician, saw his boss grab his left arm, fall to the floor at his feet and then pass out, he dropped the wires he was holding and grabbed for the wall to steady himself. But he was working in front of the circuit breaker box, and instead of grabbing the wall, he accidentally switched on the main power feed. "Egad!" exclaimed Vinny, as his boss' body convulsed from the electricity, and he quickly switched the power off again. But it turned out to be an egadvantage, since the jolt restarted his boss' heart, saving his life.

Etymology: Egad - an expletive or mild oath (euphemistic corruption of the oath, "by God") + Advantage - a beneficial factor or combination of factors (from Old French, avantage "to come before")

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COMMENTS:

Good word, 'Shocking' story! - TJayzz, 2008-05-02: 16:28:00

Thank God Vinny did not conduct himself well that day!!Is this a shorts story?? - Nosila, 2008-05-03: 22:22:00

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Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: sair-ehn-DUM-eh-tye

Sentence: Once again Filbert was the accidental 'victim' of serendumbity, having made what for anyone else would be a major faux pas but for him ended up with his dream date.

Etymology: Blend of 'serendipity' (finding unexpected treasure or joy) and 'dumb' (stupid - unintelligent)

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Created by: Tigger

Pronunciation: bu-bu-'nan-za

Sentence: Howard had never had much luck betting on the horse races until one day he mixed up his picks betting on the wrong race. His trifecta win, which paid off at 50 to 1 odds, was a real booboonanza.

Etymology: Boo-boo (error or mistake) & Boon (blessing or benefit) + Bonanza (a rich mine or vein of precious metal or stones; anything which yields a large income or return)

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COMMENTS:

Welcome back, Tigger! - Nosila, 2009-06-12: 08:48:00

very good! - Mustang, 2009-06-12: 22:48:00

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Created by: splendiction

Pronunciation: bee u ti FALL

Sentence: Sis accidentally stumbled on Loor Street trying to walk in her new long spandex skinny skirt in vinyl-covered stiletto heels. Her beautifall onto a gorgeous male super model just outside Sheen’s (THE fation house) was well worth the embarrassment of having to tear off the skirt train wear it tore. As sis struggled to get up off Mr. Model, the store’s security emerged along-side the store manager, all wearing worried expressions. The manager offered Sis a serene recovery in the shop’s day spa, followed by lunch and...full replacement of the skirt!

Etymology: A mix of FALL and beautiful.

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: faw lee soop pare ee or

Sentence: FiFi had been a trained ballet dancer who had fallen on hard times and was forced to dance in a cabaret show to earn her keep. Instead of leotards and tulle tutu skirts, she wore skimpy theatrical costumes, often with paste gems and feathers or other items strategically placed on them. For the Victorian times of 1870 she lived in, these costumes were considered very scandalous. All that changed one night when the thin straps of her loose dress burdened with the heavy weight of 10 pounds of fake cherries broke free while she was in motion. Her audience was allowed to gaze upon her totally nude body for several minutes before she realized what had happened. Fifi's wardrobe malfunction became the follysuperior of her career and instantly took her from the back of the chorus line to become the featured performer. The stage manager, smelling a fortune to be made, arranged for her to do this every performance, so appreciative was the audience's response. Yes, gentlemen for miles around came to see her lose her cherries every night and that's how the striptease of burlesque was born.

Etymology: folly ( foolish or senseless behavior, the trait or quality of acting stupidly or rashly, a stupid mistake)& superior (of high or superior quality or performance)& rhymes with Folies Bergères (Paris Music Hall which featured bawdy song and dance reviews between 1890-1920, including burlesque and nearly nude dances and stripteases, and later, Josephine Baker)

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COMMENTS:

Love the story. Hilarious! - Tigger, 2008-05-02: 21:57:00

Top story. - OZZIEBOB, 2008-05-04: 06:52:00

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Created by: alicat

Pronunciation: work-el

Sentence: I wurkelled when I crashed my mom's car. Now the insurance is replacing the car with a new one. Did I do that?

Etymology: Win + Urkel (as in Steve Urkel from Family Matters) or Work + Urkel

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: err or ist

Sentence: Randy was an airrorist. He'd slept in late, had not finished packing and due to heavy traffic got to the airport just as his flight to Miami took off without him. He had to rebook, wait 4 hours and finally boarded, only to learn that the flight he missed had been hijacked to Cuba and no one knew the fate of the passengers yet. His airror this morning saved his life!

Etymology: Air (travel via aircraft;flying) & Error (a misconception resulting from incorrect information;a wrong action attributable to bad judgment or ignorance or inattention) & ist (suffix for a person who follows a belief or does something) (Rhymes with Terrorist (a radical who employs terror as a political weapon; usually organizes with other terrorists in small cells; often uses religion as a cover for terrorist activities)

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Created by: bookowl

Pronunciation: ya/who/bu/bu

Sentence: A yahoobooboo occurs when you're in a hurry and you accidentally push the close button in the elevator just as a large group of people approaches.

Etymology: yahoo + boo boo

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COMMENTS:

That's funny and I like to say the word! - arrrteest, 2008-05-02: 15:48:00

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Created by: metrohumanx

Pronunciation: ben-ih-FLUKKED-up

Sentence: Their boss was a floozy- Todd really expected… To get some "OT" but was firmly rejected. Although he believed through the ranks he’d move up- He’s unemployed now ‘cause he BENEFLUKEDUP. Boasting about how she was more than willin’... His workmates line up now to take penicillin.

Etymology: BENEfits+FLUKE+f*ckeD UP= BENEFLUKEDUP.....BENEFIT: advantage, useful aid, help, a service provided by an employer in addition to wages or salary; Middle English, from Anglo-French benfet, from Latin bene factum, from neuter of bene factus, past participle of bene facere.....FLUKE: a stroke of luck, an accidentally successful stroke at billiards, pool, or social climbing; Middle English floke, fluke, from Old English flōc; akin to Old English flōh chip, Old High German flah smooth, Greek plax flat surface, and probably to Old English flōr floor.....F*ck up: to ruin or spoil especially through stupidity or carelessness, to act foolishly or stupidly, to blunder; origin uncertain.

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COMMENTS:

Your poems are epic, like played in 3D, who knew one could rhyme about the joys of VD? - Nosila, 2009-06-12: 08:53:00

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Created by: TJayzz

Pronunciation: Blun-der-bow-nus

Sentence: If it hadn't been for Jack's stupid mistake of signing up for the cookery class instead of woodwork, then he would never have met his fiance Becky, it certainly had turned out to be a blunderbonus.

Etymology: Blunder(mistake) + Bonus(unexpected pleasant surprise) = Blunderbonus

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