Verboticisms

Created by: CharlieB

Pronunciation: ex-sell-usion

Sentence: You might think Bob is working hard on his spreadsheets. But they're not real. It's an excellusion.

Etymology: Excel (data spread sheets) + illusion (a false impression of reality)

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Created by: remistram

Pronunciation: ill-uge-ee-busy-un

Sentence: Stan was an expert at utilizing effective illusibusions - so much so that he was promoted to senior clerk.

Etymology: illusion + busy

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Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: dosss err eee ay

Sentence: he carried his dosserier with him everywhere, adding different coloured stickies each month or so to keep it looking fresh. He called it his licence to kill....time.

Etymology: dossier, dosser

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COMMENTS:

Hopefully the use of his dosserier won't come back to kick him in the dosserriere. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:48:00

Maybe he carried it in a fanny pack - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 09:26:00

How cheeky! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:36:00

i hate to butt in, but is there no rear end to these pun threads?! - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:41:00

ooh that reminds me - it's lunchtime and now I'm in the moods for buns - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:10:00

oops I meant mood - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:11:00

I'm thinking it would be out-of-line to make a comment about sticky buns, but the air conditioner isn't working in my office today. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 12:36:00

Such a tool would be perfect for hiding the fact that you're just bumming around instead of working your @$$ off. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:05:00

Some might say you should just turn the other cheek, jadenguy, but I'm behind you 100% if you want to get to the bottom of this problem. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:10:00

Rear end to the pun threads? Tush, tush. I've got a haunch we'll be back end the saddle tomorrow. Now, let me hit the can and we can all go grab a Heinie. Fanny that I should put it that way... I've been glute to my seat the hole day. Sorry, that last one was for posteriority. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 14:34:00

OMG Clayton and ErWenn! Too fanny! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 14:45:00

I think we should put an ASSterisk beside this definition - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:47:00

i'm sorry if I came off a little anal before, as i didn't mean to be so stern. but i just find puns comical garbage that we'll always keep with us, but like junk in the trunk of your car that you forget about for as long as possible, bodonkadonk on wood. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 16:59:00

LMAO!! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 17:46:00

No butts about it, my friend laughed so hard it rectum! - petaj, 2007-06-14: 04:29:00

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: sha man ila

Sentence: Steve was the shamanila at the office. Most of his 8 hour shift was devoted to avoiding work. He had carried around his faithful manila folder daily trying to look busy. For 8 years he had fooled everyone. Until the day he got his new manager, Liz. She asked him to write out his job description. How in the world was he going to turn his one sentence actual duties (Carries around a file folder.) into a whole page or two of action verbs and activities?

Etymology: Sham (a person who makes deceitful pretenses;something that is a counterfeit; not what it seems to be) & Manila (a strong paper or thin cardboard with a smooth light brown finish made from e.g. Manila hemp & Shaman (one who practices sorcery)

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Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyl loo zhun

Sentence: He was the Great Pretender in our office. Sadly, because he was a male, he got away with it for way longer than any female would even dare try. Yes, Seymour Dolittle, was a fileusion. He would stalk the halls carrying a file folder and pretend to "do his rounds" with nothing more than what turned out to be a pizza place menu and and a bus schedule in his file folder. He fooled the senior management for over 5 years (the ladies in the company twigged on after a year or two, but had nowhere to lodge their concerns). When the cuts came, no one could salvage Seymour, as he worked for no one, did not report to anyone and could never successfully explain his presence in the hallowed halls. Luckily for him, he worked long enough to collect a great pension, unemployment insurance and a tasty severance for all his hard-worked time. Nice work if you can get it...and he wasn't even a CEO of anything!

Etymology: File (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & Illusion (an erroneous mental representation; the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; an illusory feat; considered magical by naive observers)

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: fan/tuh/files

Sentence: John had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's completed three different projects today and it's only noon." John's phantofiles put him in line for a raise.

Etymology: phantom + files

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COMMENTS:

phantastic - Nosila, 2010-01-07: 18:50:00

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Created by: OZZIEBOB

Pronunciation: SHURK-prop

Sentence: Bob was a fauxbullient gizbo, but most of all he was a scheming skirkprop.

Etymology: SHIRK: One who lives by shifts and tricks; one who avoids the performance of duty or labor& PROP: any movable articles, item or objects used on the set of a play or movie;

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COMMENTS:

Bob sounds like a complete fauxny. Shirkbait? Good word! - Mustang, 2008-08-06: 05:35:00

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Created by: Stevenson0

Pronunciation: fan/tuh/files

Sentence: John had six different coloured sets of phantofiles he alternated at various times of the day to keep 'The Man' off his case and to demonstrate his industriousness and multitasking abilities. "Damn, he's good!" thought his boss. "He's completed three different projects today and it's only noon." John's phantofiles put him in line for a raise.

Etymology: phantom + files

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COMMENTS:

hmm - good ploy - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 10:53:00

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Created by: jesster

Pronunciation: Ass-id-you-plicity

Sentence: While Neville's constant assiduplicity never fooled the people that actually accomplished things, management was completely taken in. He was promoted so frequently that his failures never caught up to him, and soon was in charge of the entire department.

Etymology: assiduous (involved in often constant activity )+ duplicity (the inclination or practice of misleading others through lies or trickery)

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Created by: kendriveset

Pronunciation: bo-ga-strive

Sentence: Jim took more effort to bogustrive around the office than it would\'ve taken to actually do some work.

Etymology: bogus + strive

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COMMENTS:

good one - Nosila, 2010-01-07: 18:50:00

thanks so much - kendriveset, 2010-01-08: 15:48:00

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