Vote for the best verboticism.

'Why do you always carry that file folder?'

DEFINITION: n. A prop (e.g. papers, files or any non-functional equipment) used to create the illusion of busyness. v. To use office supplies to create the illusion that you are working.

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Verboticisms

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Fauxsimile

Created by: ryanpetie

Pronunciation: foh-sim-ill-lay

Sentence: Darren gathered his fauxsimiles and strode around the office like a man possessed. 'A few more laps,' he thought, 'and I could be managing partner.'

Etymology: faux/facsimile

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Fileusion

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: fyl loo zhun

Sentence: He was the Great Pretender in our office. Sadly, because he was a male, he got away with it for way longer than any female would even dare try. Yes, Seymour Dolittle, was a fileusion. He would stalk the halls carrying a file folder and pretend to "do his rounds" with nothing more than what turned out to be a pizza place menu and and a bus schedule in his file folder. He fooled the senior management for over 5 years (the ladies in the company twigged on after a year or two, but had nowhere to lodge their concerns). When the cuts came, no one could salvage Seymour, as he worked for no one, did not report to anyone and could never successfully explain his presence in the hallowed halls. Luckily for him, he worked long enough to collect a great pension, unemployment insurance and a tasty severance for all his hard-worked time. Nice work if you can get it...and he wasn't even a CEO of anything!

Etymology: File (a set of related records (either written or electronic) kept together) & Illusion (an erroneous mental representation; the act of deluding; deception by creating illusory ideas; an illusory feat; considered magical by naive observers)

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Fibdjet

giveaphuk

Created by: giveaphuk

Pronunciation: Fib De Jet

Sentence: she fibdjeted with pieces of paper while looking @ the clock waiting from home time.

Etymology: Fib = to like & djet - ending of word fidget - meaning to behave or move nervously or restlessly.

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Dosserier

Created by: galwaywegian

Pronunciation: dosss err eee ay

Sentence: he carried his dosserier with him everywhere, adding different coloured stickies each month or so to keep it looking fresh. He called it his licence to kill....time.

Etymology: dossier, dosser

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COMMENTS:

Hopefully the use of his dosserier won't come back to kick him in the dosserriere. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:48:00

Maybe he carried it in a fanny pack - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 09:26:00

How cheeky! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:36:00

i hate to butt in, but is there no rear end to these pun threads?! - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 11:41:00

ooh that reminds me - it's lunchtime and now I'm in the moods for buns - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:10:00

oops I meant mood - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 12:11:00

I'm thinking it would be out-of-line to make a comment about sticky buns, but the air conditioner isn't working in my office today. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 12:36:00

Such a tool would be perfect for hiding the fact that you're just bumming around instead of working your @$$ off. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:05:00

Some might say you should just turn the other cheek, jadenguy, but I'm behind you 100% if you want to get to the bottom of this problem. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:10:00

Rear end to the pun threads? Tush, tush. I've got a haunch we'll be back end the saddle tomorrow. Now, let me hit the can and we can all go grab a Heinie. Fanny that I should put it that way... I've been glute to my seat the hole day. Sorry, that last one was for posteriority. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 14:34:00

OMG Clayton and ErWenn! Too fanny! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 14:45:00

I think we should put an ASSterisk beside this definition - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:47:00

i'm sorry if I came off a little anal before, as i didn't mean to be so stern. but i just find puns comical garbage that we'll always keep with us, but like junk in the trunk of your car that you forget about for as long as possible, bodonkadonk on wood. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 16:59:00

LMAO!! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 17:46:00

petaj No butts about it, my friend laughed so hard it rectum! - petaj, 2007-06-14: 04:29:00

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Portfonio

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: pôrtˈfōnēˌō

Sentence: Gerry has all the correct business props, the pinstripe suit, the proper tie, the Blackberry. He is never seen without his portfolio. The truth; the suit is a cheap knock-off; the tie, a clip-on; Blackberry, a much too expensive cell phone and the portfolio, a portfonio that holds nothing more than his lunch.

Etymology: portfolio (a large, thin, flat case for loose sheets of paper such as drawings or maps) + phony (not genuine; fraudulent)

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Slackcessory

Created by: purpleartichokes

Pronunciation: slak-sess-or-ee

Sentence: Phil's slackcessory wasn't fooling anyone. The "tech manual" he was toting around was the instruction booklet for his lawn mower. Apparently, he was Fridazed when he took that course on shirkonomics.

Etymology: slack (to avoid work), accessory

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COMMENTS:

I thought a slackcessory was a new belt. - galwaywegian, 2007-06-13: 07:01:00

great one purple! - toadstool57, 2007-06-13: 07:07:00

Bravo! - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:42:00

very good!! - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 09:27:00

Galway - a belt would be a britch-hiker. And I'm quite pleased that I finally made a word that I actually like! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:33:00

actually purple I think a britch-hiker is a brilliant word for suspenders - how about a belt being a gutwrencher - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 10:57:00

That's good! Wish one came with the squishsuit I bought this year. - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 11:21:00

"Slackcessory" is indeed a good word, though it sounds like it would apply equally to a device for enhancing the slacking experience (such as a Gameboy) as it would to a device for hiding the slacking experience. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:13:00

And "britch-hiker" is simply awesome. I think it's a generic term for anything that pulls your pants up, such as a belt, a pair of suspenders, or a wedgie-giver. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:14:00

the best - pguse, 2007-06-13: 14:55:00

Yep. Wished I thought of that. - texmom, 2007-06-13: 20:41:00

ErWenn makes a good point, but I think that words such as these might offer more utility than their highly specified synonyms. This one might have eight different sense of meaning. Perhaps more in America. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 20:41:00

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Industricators

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: in-DUST-ri-caters

Sentence: Memo To: WOT Team..... From: WOT Team Leader %%%%%%%%%%%% Hi Team, The big boss is coming to visit on Friday. Please make sure that you have a good selection of industricators and suggestoilibles on hand to ensure that she leaves with 'right' impression. We don't want her to think that WOT stands for Waste of Time. ta, oh and please eat this memo before Friday.

Etymology: industry + indicator + extricate (could get the lazy staffer an allayoffment, and out of a sticky situation)

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COMMENTS:

LOVE the sentence! - purpleartichokes, 2007-06-13: 10:39:00

if the definition was having too many awesome words and not being able to choose, my word would be petajalot. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 12:15:00

if the definition was having too many awesome words and not being able to choose, my word would be petajalot. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 12:26:00

...dont' refresh AND send post data or whatever. - jadenguy, 2007-06-13: 12:27:00

petaj The other one I had that I discarded was apparaphertoilia. Paraphernalia to create an appearance of toil. - petaj, 2007-06-13: 18:33:00

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Disworkillusionment

Created by: keeno82uk

Pronunciation: dis-work-illusion-ment

Sentence: "that guy is so practicing disworkillusionment, as he always carries around that file"

Etymology: Meaning the illusion of work by cloaking your lack of said work using props, i.e folder, laptop

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Earpencil

Created by: texmom

Pronunciation: Eer pen sill

Sentence: He wandered around with an earpencil as if he were doing math.

Etymology: ear - yeah the body part pencil - simple graphic tool

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Evidiligence

Created by: ErWenn

Pronunciation: /ˌɛvəˈdɪlədʒɛns/

Sentence: While folders and papers make excellent passive evidiligence for someone on the move, a mobile phone or PDA can serve the same purpose even when seated at one's desk, though such tools require an active effort to complete the effect of slackofflage.

Etymology: From evidence + diligence

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COMMENTS:

very on-message you evidiligently gave it a lot of thought. - galwaywegian, 2007-06-13: 07:03:00

Don't indilige him. - Clayton, 2007-06-13: 07:50:00

Actually, I didn't give it that much thought. I just borrowed some thoughts I'd had from when I created the previous verboticism "slackofflage." I've noticed that some of my highest-scoring words are ones I was least confident in (such as "mockliment.") Maybe there's a message there. Maybe I just give everything too much thought. Yeah, that seems more likely. - ErWenn, 2007-06-13: 14:02:00

now now ErWenn - you know what they say about making ASSumptions - Jabberwocky, 2007-06-13: 14:20:00

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2007-06-13: 00:01:00
The "S" in Timothy Johnson's GUST stands for Strategy. And strategy is key! Especially if you are trying to get way with doing nothing. Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram and Timothy! ~ James

Rebekah - 2009-11-05: 18:33:00
Protaskinate

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2010-01-07: 00:38:00
Today's definition was suggested by remistram. Thank you remistram. ~ James