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'What are you doing in the fast lane?!!'

DEFINITION: n. A driver who ignores the rules of the road by driving very slowly (i.e. at the legal limit) in the fast lane. v. To strictly observe the "suggested" speed limits, even when using the fast lane.

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Verboticisms

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Slowffeur

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: slo fewer

Sentence: Archie drove his ancient Triumph convertible every day down the freeway to his appointments and errands. He was a slowffeur and believed his car lasted longer if he drove slower. Luckily he was very hard of hearing, so he missed all the honks he got from his fellow commuters in the fast lane. He believed that a safe speed was one that was exactly one half of the posted limit. He was finally pulled over one morning by the Highway Patrol. The officer naturally requested to see his license and insurance papers, to which Archie finally shouted: "Never needed either, since I never go over the limits. I don't need papers, I know how to drive!"

Etymology: Slow (not moving quickly; taking a comparatively long time) & Chauffeur (someone paid to drive a person in a car;to drive someone in a vehicle;a person who drives vehicles for a living)

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COMMENTS:

I think I rode in his taxi once. - Mustang, 2009-05-26: 06:42:00

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Routelout

Created by: Mustang

Pronunciation: ROUT-lout

Sentence: Maggard was an absolute routelout, driving the routes and freeways at his own speed, gawking around at the countryside sightseeing and just absolutely oblivious to the traffic or the concerns of other drivers.

Etymology: Blend of 'route' (highway) and 'lout' (an awkward, stupid person; clumsy, ill-mannered boor; oaf)

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COMMENTS:

He's everywhere! - Nosila, 2009-05-26: 15:58:00

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Velociteedoff

petaj

Created by: petaj

Pronunciation: ve-loss-a-teed-off

Sentence: Melinda changed down another gear, cursed at length and then resorted to deep breathing. But as long as she was checked by the responsible, law abiding and safe driver in front of her, she would suffer the effects of being velociteedoff.

Etymology: velocity + teed off

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COMMENTS:

nice - Jabberwocky, 2008-04-07: 12:52:00

Good word. - Mustang, 2008-04-08: 03:14:00

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Carhography

Created by: Jabberwocky

Pronunciation: car/hog/graf/ee

Sentence: A firm believer in carhography gets out his map and follows the road at a set speed, keeping his eyes forward and never paying attention to anyone behind him.

Etymology: car + hog + cartography

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COMMENTS:

Clever word... like the mapping aspect - Jamagra, 2008-04-07: 14:02:00

(baby you can drive my car...) - purpleartichokes, 2008-04-07: 18:23:00

Very close to the mark - OZZIEBOB, 2008-04-07: 20:34:00

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Slotorist

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: slōtərist

Sentence: It never fails. The only day that you are behind schedule, you get stuck in back of a slotorist. Through the rear window all you can see is a fedora and a set of wrinkled white knuckles. The brake lights pop on at every curve or dip in the road. Just when you think you\'ll explode, you get a section of the road where you can pass. On you go to make up some time only to get pulled for speeding. The procedure takes a few minutes. Just long enough for you to resume your position behind Methuselah.

Etymology: slow (not quick or fast) + motorist (driver of an automobile)

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COMMENTS:

been there done that - Nosila, 2010-06-11: 11:56:00

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Hungruity

Created by: Rikkesop

Pronunciation: Hungerity

Sentence: To be so hungry, that you get angry

Etymology:

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Lackcelerate

Created by: Nosila

Pronunciation: lak sel er ayt

Sentence: When Sydney drove his old sports car out and about, he drove very slowly even in the fast lane, behind a big cow. His failure to lackcelerate caused many passersby to give him the finger and hurl abuse at him. Sydney did not care...he was nearly deaf, wore thick glasses due to his myopia and put-putted his way along. One day the local constabulary pulled him over for obstructing the flow of traffic. The officer was confused why Sydney was always following a cow. Sydney pointed out that the cow was towing him because it saved him a fortune on gas!

Etymology: Lack (to be without) & Accelerate (to move faster)

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COMMENTS:

must have been fresian with the top down :) - galwaywegian, 2010-06-11: 03:40:00

But he lived happily heifer after... - Nosila, 2010-06-11: 11:53:00

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Slomomotorist

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: slōmōmōtərist

Sentence: It never fails, whenever Jim is in a hurry he falls in behind a slomomotorist. He should have known better this time. As he approached this virtual speed bump he saw all the classic signs, the over-sized sedan of dark bland color, the omnipresent turn signal, the silhouette of a fedora and white knuckles. The only thing that was more annoying was the guy in the next lane who felt it was his job to match the speed of the one in front of him effectively blocking him in.

Etymology: slow-motion (action appears slower than in real life) + motorist (the driver of an automobile)

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Egomotortist

Created by: verbherder

Pronunciation: ee-goh-moh-tawr-tist

Sentence: It was ten minutes to close at the only store in town when my baby's mama held up the last diaper in the house and announced that junior had suddenly developed an explosive case of diarrhea. I would have made it there and back with time to spare if not for an egomotortist in a Prius. When I returned without reinforcements, things went south down south. For the rest of the night I wished that junior could have spent just one minute in that guy's car.

Etymology: egotist + motorist + tortoise (in sound mostly)

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Slotorist

artr

Created by: artr

Pronunciation: slōtərist

Sentence: Wouldn’t you know it, the one morning that Jim was running late he gets behind an ancient slotorist. Why this lady is out this early driving her automosnail, nobody knows but it is clear that she is exceeding the impede limit.

Etymology: slow (not quick or fast) + motorist (the driver of an automobile)

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Comments:

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2008-04-07: 00:01:00
Today's definition was suggested by stache and Biscotti. Thank you stache and Biscotti. ~ James

arrrteest - 2008-04-07: 17:40:00
A friend of mine always said, "Beware of old men in hats driving Buicks." I remember driving up the NJ Turnpike at 75MPH and pushing 80 in the right lane and being flashed by motorists thinking I was going too slow!

purpleartichokes - 2008-04-07: 18:03:00
My dad always said "Beware of men smoking cigars and driving station wagons." Wouldn't ya know, my first close call was with one of them?

logarithm - 2008-11-27: 11:18:00
Hehehe...

Verbotomy Verbotomy - 2009-05-26: 00:05:00
Today's definition was suggested by Biscotti. Thank you Biscotti. ~ James

PennonFurl - 2018-06-13: 19:02:00